Tag: school

Scattershot – 5th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

You made them, baby boys
Conceived in a sweaty room
Forgotten fruit left to rot
The urge to run too soon

Scattershot bonds stretch
Heated passion, spoiled seeds
Helpless baby boys flailing
Without the direction he needs

You made them, baby girls
Breeders, they can’t stop breeding
Pretty pink unkissed lips
Rushing towards the seeding

Scattershot, the TV dreams
Promises whispered or unspoken
Babies make babies cry
So all the boys and girls are broken

Submitted to FOWC with Fandango and inspired by my experiences teaching wild and untamed students already on their sexual journies as their young parents are missing in action (for various reasons).

Today I’m feeling:

Good again.  I pushed through the tough exercise again this morning, feeling breathless and sweaty by the end.  Amy has been sound asleep in the mornings for the last few days and in the evenings I’m usually asleep well before her.

I enjoyed my first two grade 11 classes this morning and just have a reading class with the grade 8s this afternoon and it’s the weekend again.

Today I’m grateful for:

My student, Beam. In the task I set his class yesterday of sending me an oral diary telling me what they learned that day, Beam told me that he really enjoys my class and learning things from me. 

Whilst he is smart enough to know how to butter someone up I believe his sincerity. It felt good to hear and encourages me. I will return that encouragement to the class.

The best thing about today was:

… (As I’m writing this on Saturday morning, I don’t feel that there was one best thing about yesterday. The day was pretty good all round until I ran out of energy, and as I’m still not fully recovered yet, it is clouding my memory of yesterday a little too.)

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In my last class, I could feel my energy giving out and was glad to end it a little early and then head home.  I revived briefly with some dinner, but by around 7.30 pm, I was crashing badly and melting into the lounge, mindlessly watching TV.

Amy tried to revive me again before sleep, but ended up disappointed, and I was asleep an instant later.

(I didn’t even have energy to complete writing here and doing it now on Saturday morning)

Something I learned today?

Praew told me that she will leave our school at the end of the semester because of her unhappiness, and on further investigation, she told me it was because she was bullied in our class. 

I thought maybe this was by her old friends, Nudee and Ueang, but I was surprised to learn that it was by KanomBang. I hadn’t seen this at all.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I sympathised with Praew and her situation.

Satisfied – 1st July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments

Through a process of elimination
We conquered our impulsive mind
To overcome the madness
That once made us so blind

Valley waters now run clean
Pure air fills our lungs
Meditating on our madness
Forced to review the sums

So the moon eyes open
A twinkle amongst the gleams
Falcon flight a-diving
At the fish thriving in our streams

Submitted to No Theme Thursday and Three Things Challenge #M739

Today I’m feeling:

A little bit down this morning, but not about anything specifically.  I think it was still the leftover rust from drinking on Friday.  It takes so long for me to recover now that it just isn’t worth it.

I struggled with exercise this morning but glad that I did.  I have found some videos that I might try to follow, too.  I keep going across different exercise apps, but they all want my money and for some reason I only just now realised I can just follow along with videos instead.  I’ll try my first one tomorrow.

I felt much better after my first class, my happy grade 12s and the lesson I had come up with worked well with them, so that gives me confidence for the next two classes that I try it with.

Today I’m grateful for:

My wage (again!).  Much of it disappearing already into cat food, the electricity bill and a little shopping.  A bit more will disappear tomorrow when I pay off my credit at House.

The best thing about today was:

Kru Tang roping me into helping a trio of primary students with their pronunciation for a presentation that they will give next week.  Their English is excellent already and I could only offer minimal advice.

But the best things that came out of it is that for three days next week, many students are away at these competitions so the school will be closed to students. Those not in competitions are to be taught online.

What that means for me, though, is no classes as I don’t have the knowledge or facility to teach online.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Suddenly, the power went out when I was teaching and I was assuming that it was in the whole building, school or area.  I continued teaching without missing a beat and writing on the board instead of using the projector.

Something I learned today?

At the end of the class, when the power went out, I discovered that it was just our room where it was out and so I assumed that a breaker had been tripped and now I know where they are.  

Another teacher asked me if both of the air conditioning units were on and I wasn’t sure but it made me think afterwards, what if they were?  There are two air conditioning units in each classroom, why have them if there is not enough capacity to use them!?

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I sent Baipad and Anchan a translated parable from Khalil Gibran.  It is about fear and dealing with it.  

I talked it through with Baipad who is not well practiced at understanding allegory or thinking more broadly about things.  

I hope that she understood the meaning a little deeper than before.

Accord – 14th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Agreeance is harmony
Connected in symmetry
She and he, they and thee
It’s the you and me
The we,
Written in accord

Submitted for Reena’s Xploration Challenge #330

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty rough this morning, starting at around 60% I guess and now, in the evening back to around 80%.  I will skip exercising in the mornings this week and start again next week instead.  

We start teaching our classes on Thursday.  

It was freaking hot walking around school today and I have a lot more walking between buildings than before too.

Today I’m grateful for:

Spending a little time with Kru Ren, chatting about the new program that he is supposed to be writing lessons for but which he hasn’t even started yet because he’s just not sure what he’s supposed to be doing!

The best thing about today was:

Getting my head around how everything will work for me this semester.  There will be some challenges ahead, some teething problems but I’m sure I will settle in pretty well.  

I found and printed some fun activities from the Twinkl downloads on Sunday and hope they go well.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I ran out of A4 paper to print on in the main office and when I asked someone there for some more they only gave me a few sheets.  Even though I couldn’t finish what I wanted I decided not to get bothered by it and will find some paper somewhere else to print with tomorrow.

Something I learned today?

JubJib told me where building 8 was this morning and I explored it to see the rooms that I will be teaching in there.  They are a bit rough but I’ll do my best.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I rescued a dragonfly in the kitchen.  After what must have been a frustrating few hours for it, it settled on my finger and I walked it outside to freedom.

My vile deed:  I appropriated an ethernet cable from one of the classrooms to carry with me as I’m never sure of the Wifi access in each building and don’t trust its stability.

Did you do something difficult or challenging today?

I’m suffering a little with the heat as I’m getting used to wearing long pants and long sleeves again.  If I was feeling 100% I would be ok but as I’m a little under the weather it was a bit of a challenge today.

Plucky – 7th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Pray tell me, where it is you go
Lady of this loveless moon
Underneath the stars on show
Could it be considered too soon?
Kisses taken nice and slow
Youthful daring saw this romance bloom

Submitted to RDP – Plucky

Today I’m feeling:

Exhausted (at the end of the day).  I got through the morning exercise easily, hurting my legs further after two 10,000-step days.

I kept running ok throughout the day but once home in the afternoon, I flaked pretty quickly.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Keng and Kru Bright, who provided me with a table to store my stuff in their room in the new building, where I will generally be teaching now.

The building is a little removed from the rest of the school but if I keep parking out by the cafe it means I will have to walk through the canteen and the main playground so I will be sure to still meet many of my students.

The best thing about today was:

Meeting the new teacher in Primary. He’s an Aussie ‘activist’, obviously a weed smoker and hinted at being a conspiracy theorist.  He was quite interesting to talk to for a while as he had been in China around the same time I was there and knew some of the bands.

He mentioned how much he was looking forward to teaching here but I got the feeling from his personality that he won’t last long.

12th Dec 2024 – I found out later that he didn’t even make it a full week!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Back to school, back to disorganisation.  There was a message about the Songkran blessing with the school directors and I was told it would start at nine, so I got back from coffee at that time but then the word was that it would be somewhere between 10 and 11.

I contemplated going back to the cafe but instead decided to check out where I could put my things in the new building and after moving my things, the teachers there told me it was just about to start.

No sign of George or David (though I had heard he was spotted there in the morning) so I was the only representative of the high school English teachers.  Hopefully, someone has noted that somewhere that I have been a good boy!

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

A customer at House left their charger in the wall and I alerted Ying, the latest new staff there, who ran out and gave it back.

I also dropped the word search book around to Baipad this afternoon.

After I closed the gate this evening, Amy ran out asking me to take her to the twenty-baht shop to buy a gift for Yaya, Nong Mai’s daughter, who we will meet tomorrow.  A minor annoyance but at least the 200 metre ride to the shop was nice, cool and refreshing!

Did you do something difficult or challenging today?

Back in long pants and long sleeves, I was heating up quickly and easily today.  I didn’t complain though and just got on with everything.

I should have been doing more lesson plans but ended up writing more poetry and updating the blog.  I did scan over what I still need to update and tomorrow, I will work on the next couple of IELTS lessons and Thursday, more of the presentation lessons and then Friday figuring out what else I need to add.  I just put the seed in my mind for today.

My old student from grade 7, Yaya, sent me this picture because I asked her to. I usually send her a message once a year to see how she is doing since she moved away. She was another smart kid and I’m happy to see her doing well. She appreciates my asking after her too.

For What It’s Worth – 29th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

Tell me what you want me to say
And I’ll say it
Just slip a dollar into my hand

The great shepherds of society
Created an illusion of fear
To maintain their demand

For whatever it’s worth
I’m just as happy as all the other people
I know

So drop some silver in my pocket
Buy me now
Before I go

Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – buy now.

Today I’m feeling:

Really tired again.  It feels like I just can’t get enough good unbroken sleep.  Cap woke us both up again last night, vomiting up some food.  

I’m starting to feel really concerned for him now.  He’s not eating or drinking enough and is all saggy skin and bones.  It feels like this might be his final days but I hope I’m wrong.  

Maybe I’m just being overly cautious after being less concerned with Kim Chi last year.

Today I’m grateful for:

The people who found Leo after he ran off this evening and Amy had to go and ride around to search for him. Without luck, she then just happened to check a local online message board where someone had posted that they’d found a lost dog. That crazy Leo!

The best thing about today was:

Watching more of the 3 Body Problem. I don’t have energy for much at the moment and am already in bed at 8 pm.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

After a couple of coffees, I cancelled meeting up with Matt and figured to go to school and sign the documents to get paid before going home to catch up on sleep. Nancy sent a reminder to go to sign the documents so that was my trigger to leave. 

It was already about 36 degrees and with the bad air and lack of sleep, I was super dizzy, especially after walking up to the fourth floor where waiting for me was absolutely no one. 

I was about to pass out and couldn’t wait around and so left a message with Nancy saying there was no one there and I was sick and leaving.

When I got home there was another message from Nancy saying that if I didn’t sign today I would be paid late, without giving any indication of what late meant.

I flaked into bed but couldn’t get a good rest, sleeping for maybe only twenty minutes. I tried to get Kru Mai to go and sign for me. Why not! Why do we even need to go through this nonsense every month?

At three-forty, looking like there was no other way around it I decided to drive back just to sign their paper.

I took this picture because this tree at school is blossoming and looked great with the sun rising and the school building in contrast.

Where’s Your Courage? – 28th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

“The little things are the big things.”

Courage demands bravery in this very moment
Of heroic action.

And so happiness is possible,
Living an ordinary life
In an extraordinary way

Text is borrowed and arranged from this post at The Stoa Letter and the form (Cherita) is inspired by this post at the Skeptic’s Kaddish and the title is from the Minutemen.

Today I’m feeling:

Super tired again.  Yesterday I managed to resist an afternoon nap and I got to sleep OK, until Cap kept crying to go in and out of the bedroom and then to be fed.  Happy to know that he has his appetite but I just want to sleep more!

Today I’m grateful for:

Amy and her family deciding to go for a fish lunch out in the rice fields.  It was good to do something different though it was funny that they decided on the restaurant that Bruno and I went and tried as we were riding by a year or two ago.

Also to Kru Karn who offered me her shelf space in the teacher’s room to keep my things.  I’ll do that for now but may move it to somewhere more suitable later.

The best thing about today was:

Reading more about the British Empire in Africa.  It was interesting to read that there were people who abhorred the colonial treatment of other human beings at the time.  Interesting in that nothing much has changed, sadly.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I haven’t been able to do any more lesson planning as I haven’t been able to get more information from Kru Mai about my classes yet.  It’s a little frustrating as it is what we are supposed to be doing this week and now it means I will have to do more in the actual holiday time.

When I went to school just before lunch I found lots of people cleaning out the office space for Kru Puu who will stay in there in future.  Unfortunately, this means moving my stuff out from there and also not being able to use it for one-to-one speaking exercises anymore.  A lot of student’s work that I was keeping to look at later was also missing, presumably thrown out. Oh well. Nothing stays the same.

Something I learned today?

I just got sent a video by Noey. It was of me riding the wrong way at the traffic lights (to save time) as I was out getting a tub of ice cream at the 7-11.  She must have been on her bike at the traffic lights going in the other direction.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I messaged a few more students today and had little conversations of encouragement with them.

I took this picture because this was the view from our restaurant table at lunch time.

Our Part – 26th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

When judgement comes, what may you say
In your defence?
For every tiny part you play
Comes at some expense
With violence spent, you walked away
All of it forgotten
Whilst those you hurt were forced to stay
Sour and turning rotten

When judgement comes, it will be
Seen from your heart
For better or worse, you set me free
You played your part
A part in miniature, a part of me
Reborn stronger
My part in this is plain to see
And I will stay longer

Inspired by the poem Until Then (’till the last petal falls) by Michelle Ayon Navajas and comments there.
Submitted to Weekly Prompts Weekend Challenge Miniature

Today I’m feeling:

Uncertain.  I just looked in the mirror and felt old and worthless.  Perhaps it’s because I’m not around the energy of the kids at the moment.

Last night Amy also cried that Thailand isn’t her place anymore and that she feels more at home in Australia.  There’s a lot behind that but there is also a factor that I haven’t written about here because it’s a sensitive topic and the situation is ongoing.  Needless to say, I understand her feeling, whilst not sharing it.

She also asked me if I would ever go back to England to live and I said no, which made me consider her position.

I seem to have really found myself here and just have no real idea what I would do with myself back in Australia.

Anyway, this is not a new feeling or thought and is not able to be actioned upon just yet due to having our cats and our home here, which we would need to sell.  Sometime in the future though, it looks a given that we will be back in Australia.

Today I’m grateful for:

My student, Nong Aoi, who called me this evening as she was happily cooking and eating with her boyfriend and friends.  Despite giving me big headaches last year enough to make me worry that she was going off the rails, she has calmed down a little now and is quite sweet and affectionate.  I think it’s nice that my students feel comfortable enough to call me.  I’m doubtful that they call other any other teachers.

Yesterday I also messaged a little with Nong Nam, who was Aoi’s accomplice in giving me grief last year.  She has also matured a little more now and said that she really appreciates that I contact her every six months or so to check in on her.  Sometimes it’s the small actions that make all the difference.

The best thing about today was:

Quietly reading 2000AD and Judge Dread Megazine stories after getting home mid-afternoon.  It was excellent and I was savouring the time spent.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I got a glimpse of my new classes from Kru Mai today and whilst he has taken heed of my reluctance to be involved with the Integrated classes for next semester he has spread me out into other high school classes which means figuring out new lessons to teach.

I would also not teach any grade 7 classes, for which I already have a hundred lessons accumulated over the last three years.  Oh well, new challenges lay ahead.

Cappuccino is still not looking too good at the moment and doesn’t seem to be able to settle himself into a comfortable position, like there’s something not right in his hips or belly.  Poking around doesn’t seem to cause him any discomfort but something is obviously not right.

Amy and I are both wary as it was at this time last year that Kim got sick and went to the vet a couple of times until that fateful day she didn’t come back alive.

Something I learned today?

In medieval Europe, mercury was used in medicine and manufacturing. Hatters were specifically exposed to mercuric nitrate, a form of inorganic mercury.

By 1837, “mad as a hatter” was a common saying.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I sent messages out to a few more students today to check in on how they are doing.  I discovered that Anchan is having a tough time of things these days.

She has been living with her uncle as the rest of her family have been put in prison for an illegal online gambling website!  She says her uncle is never around so she has to take care of the house and as she is not getting any money from her mum now she has to help her grandmum with selling things and gets barely enough to buy herself food.

And all that is taking away from her school work where, amazingly, she is still motivated to push herself and enrolling herself in extracurricular activities.  She’s only 14 years old.

She asked for some help with information about exchange programs to Australia and I talked a little with Kru Champ about that as it is something he is working on in the future.

It’s frustrating to see smart, motivated kids trapped in situations like this.  I hope she doesn’t give up and lose herself as so many teenagers can do.

I took this picture because Cap is not quite feeling well at the moment, unfortunately. 

The Truants – 4th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

We found our place, a gathering stone
A place to hide and smoke cigarettes
To tell each other dirty jokes
And stories of first-love fumbled sex

Hidden away from prying eyes
Though all knew where we were
Once a month, rounded up
To the headmaster’s wrath incur

It was our heaven in quiet times
To laugh and joke and sing
Away from all the realities
That our wasted lives would bring

Submitted to Crimson’s Creative Challenge, inspired by the picture above.
11th Apr 2024 – Submitted to RDP Thursday

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty relaxed and happy.  A little tired as Amy kept me up late when she got home last night, tired and emotional, overthinking about family things.

Today I’m grateful for:

The jelly candies that I bought in Mae Sai last month.  I’ve been eating them myself because they are delicious but they are also a good candy to give to my students as treats.  They mostly prefer them over the fruity Mentos.

The best thing about today was:

Having my students read one-on-one and two-on-one in my classes today.  I was happily surprised by a couple of students’ improvement over the last twelve months.  I like this time of year for the relaxed attitude towards study.

I’ve thought before that it would be good if it could be like this all the time but when I think deeper it is perhaps because of all the pushing and hard work during the year that they have gotten more comfortable with their study.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In the morning Amy told me she wanted me to come home between classes to take Cap to the vet.  I wasn’t into this idea because I wanted to chill at the cafe, catching up on reading and also because with the change of plans at the weekend it meant driving to the city and back twice instead of once.  Her plan for today would’ve meant another two trips in one day.

I suggested it would be better to wait until we got the truck back and then she can take Cap at her leisure.  Thankfully she agreed to this idea before I left for school.

Something I learned today?

I saw a headline about a Palestinian mother’s newborn twin babies who were killed in an Israeli airstrike.  She had been waiting ten years to conceive.  

Zionists sure know how to inspire hatred.  This will not end well.

25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO –  24. Never Look Back Too Long. Reflecting on the past is only good for one thing: Learning.

I am taking a lot of time looking back these days as I go through putting information into this blog.  I am sometimes nostalgic but as the life lesson says, I am using this information for learning.  

I’ve almost fully given myself over to my students and Amy these days.  I’m less inward-focused in my day-to-day life even though I do do a lot of thinking.  

I’m happy where I’m at though not sure where I am going just now.

I took this picture of the flowering tree that I park my car under in the afternoons, in a vague attempt at keeping it cool. The flowers are pretty. I think I took a similar picture last year.

The Empty Room – 19th January 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

This space buzzed by mosquitoes
A history was being carved out
Dusty messes swept into the corners
Where cockroaches nested, no doubt

Now an empty room remains
A hunger within this home
The incense lights the way
So we don’t have to be alone

Ghosts are only seen by some
A chilly feeling in prickly air
Once a room full of new stories
Is left in stasis with nothing there

Grandmum’s empty room

Today I’m feeling:

Still a little tired though I slept quite a lot. Not going to push my classes today and going to take it easy myself too.

Today I’m grateful for:

A surprise lunch date with the family at the seafood restaurant Amy and I tried last Sunday. At first I felt a little annoyed as I had wanted to stay at House to read and write after going to apply for the work permit after my first class. That quickly faded though as I’ve grown much more accustomed to sudden changes of plans. The food was also great, which certainly helped too!

The best thing about today was:

Sitting with groups of three students at a time and working on a grammar rule with them. I can usually get a good response out of small groups when there’s an opportunity to do so and we all could laugh and learn together.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I went to get my work permit and in the process they asked if I want it for two years to which I thought ‘sure!’ It was only then I wondered how much it would cost and I found out it will be 6000 baht which is all the money I have left this month!

Something I learned today?

As we’ve been busy for this last week I haven’t really asked Amy about much of what the latest news is or about all the stuff at the temple. With a couple of wines under her belt she talked for a long while about different people that attended the funeral, all of the costs and stresses for the family and what little she knew about the Buddhist rituals and rules.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I sent supportive messages to three of my students who struggled with situations today.

Nicha took this picture because she snatched my phone out of my pocket whilst I was distracted with another student. I’m quite happy for some students to do this because I can look forward to a surprise batch of photos to check later. Obviously in this shot I had caught up with her to get my phone back.

The Retreat – 17th January 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Shacked up with a slacker
Who said our gold was in the hills
A guitar strapped to his back
To sing of other people’s thrills

The words are spat with bitterness
The war is raging in his head
But anger without direction
Is replaced by apathy instead

The party starts at home
With our disaffected friends
With the battle in our songs
Forgotten when it ends

Stirred into one final action
When the pipe of peace got broke
Understanding that our pain
Is only countered by the smoke

So it was, we came and went
We conquered nothing at all
We disappeared without a trace
Into the bottom of the bowl

Nearer heaven we rested heads
Too tired to take our chance
Extinguished, all those little fires
Where we no longer dance

inspired by ‘The Slacker’ in Zachary Mexico’s book China Underground

Today I’m feeling:

A little better again though still not quite right in the sinuses. Exercise got me going and I felt in a good mood for the whole day.

Today I’m grateful for:

The vegetarian food from Oasis and dessert snacks from the snack shop. Hopefully, there are snack boxes left over again tonight.

The best thing about today was:

Teaching my grade 10 class again. It’s a good feeling to have more mature students who try and want to understand more.

It did get me feeling a little like asking to spread out the classes between the foreign teachers so that not all the juniors are dumped on me and David. I know asking this is going to upset George though as he refuses to teach the younger ones, but it feels a little unfair not to split them more evenly.

I would be less tired at the end of the week and David is always talking of quitting because of the stress of his junior classes. I love those kids but I also value my health.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Another day of going with the flow mostly.

Something I learned today?

As I teach my grade 10s about relationships I’m learning a little about each of them and their personalities. Toon told me she is a people pleaser whilst Milk doesn’t care if a boy is interested in her. They joked that between them they make a balanced human being.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I gave some leftover snacks from last night’s ceremony to some students this morning.

I drove Amy and me home and back to the city to pick up snack boxes and food for tonight’s ceremony.

I took this picture because Tokyo was pretty relaxed. I still have to be very careful with her though. She can bite really quickly and with no apparent provocation.