Tag: learning

Difficult Days – 31st August 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Give me a bad day
To show you who I am
Disturb my applecart
And mess with my plan

Look at you, all smiles
The sun, it always shines
The measure of the man
Is found in difficult times

An easy day for me
Fills me with compassion
For those facing struggle
And life comes down a-crashing

So give me a bad day
I’m gonna turn it around
Enduring all the pain
With this attitude I’ve found

Today I’m feeling:

Good for pushing through exercise this morning setting me up for my long day ahead. I’m starting to run out of time each day doing all the things I want to do and I think something is going to have to go and that will be TV and YouTube videos. I’m already cutting down just because of lack of time. Focus on the things I really prefer and enjoy to be doing. Stop wasting time.

Today I’m grateful for:

The language learning app Drops which I use to study Thai but which I have also asked a couple of my poorer students, Namsai and Nomsen, to use to study English and they checked it out this afternoon and seemed find it a little more compelling than Duolingo. I will introduce more of my classes to Drops instead and in the future. I think it is a slightly better learning tool despite not offering any opportunities to speak.

The best thing about today was:

Kinda improvising a lesson with one of my classes today and having it go really well. 

The original lesson I had planned wasn’t going to be long enough so I picked up a worksheet about ordinal numbers (they always struggle when asked what the date is) that could fill up the time. I started with it as I was expecting it to only take a few minutes. 

As they were getting themselves used to ordinal numbers I figured a best way to remember them was by doing birthdays so I went around the class asking everyone and writing them on the board. I noticed some smart students grabbing pictures so they could remember their classmate’s birthdays.

Once we had all the birthdays I got everyone and asked them to form a line from the first birthday of the year to the last and then spent 10 minutes sorting themselves out and finally I took a photo of them all.

By now time was too short to finish my planned lesson too. So I got them all to write the list of names in the order that had just just stood. This took them a good thirty minutes and I could see everyone puzzling out which name came next until finally they were done. To end, a long Kahoot to reinforce their learning. Everyone was happy and maybe they even learned something.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I decided I needed to catch up a handful of students in one class and the best way to do was to clear out the rest of the students so these ones could concentrate better. 

The class went well with the nine students, without all the usual distractions. They were initially a little miffed at their classmates going off for free time but soon understood the faster they got to it the sooner they’d be able to leave. 

With some slow careful explanations, I could see some twinkling of understanding in most of them. They finished with 30 minutes spare and off they went and off I went to House for extra coffee. 

Whilst I was there I got a message from our department head asking why my students were in the library at the time I was supposed to be teaching them. I got a little annoyed at this at first but I knew that it needed an explanation so I replied doing so. I didn’t get any reply.

Something I learned today?

Scientists have synthesised sugar out of carbon dioxide. Neat!

I took this picture because I wanted a record of the kids doing today’s lesson and lining up in birthday order. There are a few hilarious kids in this class and I hope this picture will be a useful reminder.

Cheers Big Ears – 1st June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Fighting over artificial instincts
Whilst slowly marching to unity
We come together as we fall apart
Unable to counter inevitable entropy

Fighting it is fighting oneself
Let’s all move this thing along
A cheer for you is a cheer for me
Hear the harmony within its song

Today I’m feeling:

Sweaty and in a good mood. A little tired and looking forward to the weekend, finding out Monday is yet another holiday. I also feel a little cautious and cynical in that things are going well and that I must be prepared for anything that might happen to upset that. Do I deserve to feel so content?

Today I’m grateful for:

The lady at the market for giving me a 10 baht discount as I’ve been to buy food there twice this week and bring my own plastic bag too. Maybe I’ll try and learn her name next time.

The best thing about today was:

Getting through it without much hassle. Thursday is three two-hour classes with only one one-hour gap in there. The struggling kids I was able to help along with the assistance of some of the better students in each. It gives a feeling of teamwork and camaraderie that I hope continues. The kids have learned quickly that they can have fun with me but that they also need to get things done too.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Can’t think of much again today except running out of time to do all the things I might like to do. It’s not that big a deal. 

Something I learned today?

I finally gave in to having Amy teach me some Thai. I’m at a level now where she seems a little bit impressed that I remember and have learned a lot of new things and that I’m also a little more confident too. I learned easy and difficult (ง่าย and ยาก), strong and weak (แข็งแรง and อ่อนแอ), thick and thin (หนา and บาง).

What are my priorities for this month?

Pretty much just school and the classroom for work and then to do more regular learning of Thai.
There are a few other things that are on my mental list that would be best to get done such as getting the car cleaned and the bike serviced.

I took this picture because I drive past this tree every day on my way home. I’m usually in too much of a hurry to stop and take a photo so I deliberately took the time at lunch to go and take this one. It feels like it is telling a story.

Writing For Myself – 25th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

The words I write, they are for me
Sure to be making assumptions
We are brothers and sisters in arms
(and anyone that cares to fall between)

Sometimes listening to the wind
Eases my burden, settles my heart

The hard code of my heart
Has been passed along for generations
back to the dawn of time

Now at this time of life, whenever it is
Let’s hope the engine keeps running

I only stop learning to rest my eyes
Things long gone are encoded and not forgotten
Whatever is coming towards me
Is all a part of nature’s play

A paraphrasing of section 1 of Walt Whitman’s Song For Myself
2nd May 2024 – Submitted to dVerse

Today I’m feeling:

Like I had a long day with three two-hour classes. I enjoy the days filled with work just as much as the days with little to do. I don’t really have a chance to think about how I’m feeling until I get home, have a cold shower and rest my aching legs. By that time I’m happy with the work being completed.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Tongjai for offering to write some instructions for my classes in Thai to help sort out the login problems I was having with Quizizz. She said she would do it at around midday. However during my classes that morning I figured out how to fix the problem myself and finally understood how it worked. When I saw her in the afternoon I told her I had sorted it out and she was happy because she had gotten called away to do something else too. I’ve learned to trust in things working out in time but this one was getting me worried as all my lessons are arranged around using the website. As I’ve been looking deeper into the website reporting I am also seeing more and more great options for the classroom. So I am grateful to Quizizz too.

The best thing about today was:

As mentioned above, figuring out fixing that problem felt pretty good. Along with that was some welcome rain and a continued good feeling amongst the students at school.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Finding out my student lists are all messed up was a bit annoying but then I remembered that this happens every year. One upside of this was figuring out who students were by their student ID numbers stitched onto their uniforms in Thai script. I need to learn how their numbers are written.

Something I learned today?

Looking at what I’ve written already I can see that I’ve learned many things today that are at least of some use in my day-to-day life. Maybe not substantial life-changing knowledge but useful at least.

What changes am I experiencing in my life right now?

Some physical changes due to aging such as getting tired more easily and not being able to get all my pee put easily. Will the upside of that be that I won’t suffer incontinence though maybe kidney stones instead? 
As to mental changes, I believe I am still learning and getting smarter each day. I think I’m happier as I age too, the irony of which is not lost on me.
As to life in general I don’t feel like there are any significant changes really. Nothing beyond what I can expect. There will be a change soon enough when Amy gets back in October which will have to be dealt with but I feel confident we will work things out for the best.

I took this picture from the top floor of our school building because I have to remind myself how nice it is here. I am comfortable and relaxed with my work stresses. Things are going well.

Hey Coach – 20th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Everyone’s a life coach these days
Selling dopamine for the bucks
Hiding behind their plastic smiles
Of a thousand nips and tucks

No one is living by their words
But knows the right things to say
Stuck forever in the idea of living
Instead of just living that way

Today I’m feeling:

A little weak and tired from lack of sleep but I got a little motivation after talking with Amy. Sometimes I just need a kick-along and be given a task or a deadline. She’s very good at giving me tasks. I’ve gotten very lazy since she’s been overseas.

Today I’m grateful for:

Inspiration found in different places. Sometimes I struggle to find things to write a poem about but if I’m noticing enough and paying attention to the small things then ideas can be transformed into words in my head and then to paper.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling satisfied with just instant noodles, a little chopped onion and an egg for lunch. Some days it’s enough.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy inspired me to take a look at the back door and try and make it usable again and I soon realized I’d need the electric drill to get out the screws her dad had put in. I found it again and was reminded of the fact that our drill is useless. It works for two seconds and then stops and will maybe start again with a jiggle of the battery or fully removing it and slamming back in again.
I remembered that this seemed to be the case even after charging the batteries up but I had no choice and will have to try again tomorrow in the hope the batteries are improved after an overnight charge.
It’s frustrating because I remember when we first moved here that Amy didn’t trust me to buy a drill and said her dad knew more about these things. I didn’t want a cordless drill figuring we have power outlets all over the place. The drill we ended up with is a pain in the ass and I was getting so frustrated with it this evening that I almost threw it in the field and wanted to drive to the store to get a decent drill instead.
Hopefully, I can have the door sorted tomorrow.

Something I learned today?

I learned a bit more Thai after downloading a new app DuoCards. I’ll try and keep some momentum going with studying again.

How did this past week go?

This week has been pleasant. I could go to school and hang out with my students again and come home and chill for most of each day. My new timetable only has me teaching for one hour on Mondays so it’s almost like a three-day weekend

Last night Amy took this picture because she is staying at her boss’s house to take care of this ball of fur. He’s like a massive dog version of Cap! Amy is still a little wary of dogs after Tokyo bit her and this pooch is bigger than her but he seems quite gentle and soft.

Google It – 14th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Just give me the answer
I don’t want to think
The end result the same
No waste of pen and ink

I don’t want to learn
Just want to jump the queue
Find the fast way forward
And the easiest way through

Smart enough to cheat
I’ll copy from the best
And when the time comes
I’ll just bluff the test

If I end up in the field
Painfully planting rice
I’ll remember those times
At the top were really nice

Today I’m feeling:

Smooth, content. I didn’t get enough sleep last night but it hasn’t put me in a bad mood, more like a dream state that I’m gliding through.

Today I’m grateful for:

The lady that always serves me at Oasis. She recognises me now and knows that I like to add sugar, vinegar and pickled chilli to my food.

The best thing about today was:

Relaxing a little into my classes today and enjoying the interactions with everyone. I was also heartened to receive small Valentine’s gifts from my old students as well as stickers from my current ones.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy called me and was annoyed and upset. I’d been to the hospital to see the psyche but I didn’t wait around to get the meds as there were too many people waiting. I knew I could come back later when it was quieter.

At some point, the hospital called Amy’s number because I hadn’t collected the meds. Amy’s phone diverts to her mum here in Thailand and then she calls Amy. I don’t know why no one calls me!

Amy checked on the camera and thought I wasn’t at home as I’d kept the doors all closed because of the air pollution but I was in the living room eating food and watching TV. When she called she wanted to know where I’d been and talked in an accusatory manner and this annoyed me as I was feeling very good until then.

Anyway, a little while later I’d worked my mood back into feeling positive again and called her at our regular time. She was tired and still a little grumpy so we didn’t talk long. Everything will be fine again.

Something I learned today?

I’ve read a little about a serious train derailment in Ohio that caused a huge explosion of dangerous toxic chemicals and that it hasn’t got much coverage there as the US focuses its media towards its coming war with China and having its population on board with that idea. Some reports have said that the effects of the situation are worse than a nuclear reactor meltdown!

I can feel it will soon be time to disconnect from news again soon. Everything is just seemingly fucked everywhere you look.

What makes me laugh?

Really there are not many things that make me laugh as such. I still enjoy comedy etc but that has a purpose to make you laugh. So the main thing that makes me laugh is, of course, my students. They make me laugh when they are happy and playful but also when they are angry and emotional.

I took this picture because the morning sun burns red through the haze on the horizon.

Teacher’s Lament – 31st January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Don’t be angry with me
I know you don’t see it
But I’m trying to steer you
In the right direction
I know you’re upset
Your fun was curtailed
But I’m trying to guide you
Towards self-correction

You’ll see it one day
Long after I’m gone
It will be you
With wise words to pass on

22nd Oct 2024 – Shared with Word of the Day Challenge – correct

Today I’m feeling:

A little frustrated at first but ok now. Happy.

Today I’m grateful for:

Dr Arnon for giving me medicine and cleaning spray for Tigger’s skin problem without me having to take him in. Putting the spray on today though I can see one of the wounds on his head is big and deep, with the scab coming away. I just hope the antibiotics stop him from getting infected and it can heal quickly, otherwise, it will be another trip back for Tig.

The best thing about today was:

The very cold reception I got from my class of truants from yesterday and then as they slowly understood the work they needed to do and then have to read for me and as they did it, sometimes laughing at their mistakes and finally showing some pride at their ability to do it. They are smart kids just choosing not to be.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

This morning the students were kept late at assembly and straggled into class with many things on their minds except studying. This class (1/6) has broken up into little groups that distract themselves constantly so that today no one was listening. Frustrated, I just let them leave, considering other ways or things I can teach them. Speaking with their head student though she said it’s like that in every other class too. I have a plan for tomorrow but after that… I don’t know. I do hope we get better levels of students next year or I will have to continue dumbing things down even further.

And, on top of that, the reason they were kept late was that they were being told about next week which, I just found out, is scout week! Another whole week of no classes! Any possible momentum to get going after sports week, lost again!

Something I learned today?

Luckily the thing I was trying to remember yesterday was brought back to mind today as it was whilst I was listening to the End On End podcast talking about the Autoclave record and the track Hotspur. One of the hosts mentioned that Hotspur was the name of a character in a Shakespeare play (I forget which) and just word Hotspur reminds me of one of Rik Mayall’s outrageous characters in the Black Adder. I hope to find some books of Shakespeares’ plays with cliff notes to help me understand it all. I have one on the shelf already but it’s not really at the top of the pile yet.

What is something I want to do for myself in the coming year?
Lose fat.

I took this picture because it’s not often that Tigger is close to Cap or Kim.

One Time Phenomenon – 4th January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Unique DNA makes you
What you are
Primal inclinations
Forces within
Moved to action
Mind grows
A seed planted
One time phenomenon

Inspired and borrowed from The Daily Laws by Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:

Tired but happy and satisfied.

Today I’m grateful for:

The pizza oven at Bruno and Nut’s for quickly baking delicious pizza for me, Amy, mum and dad. Nut had prepared the dough and ingredients and we made our own pizza toppings. Bruno enjoyed talking with Amy’s dad and got us all invited to their home for a Chinese New Year celebration in a few weeks time.

The best thing about today was:

Seeing Tangmo and his friend running, playing and rolling around on our lawn as I was eating breakfast. It made me smile, these stupid crazy dogs having fun at our house. Just a few seconds later they were gone and I saw them running up the street in the distance.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The way I structured my last class of the day meant many students could take advantage and do as little work as they wanted but they needed to be ready when they were called. As it was the end of the day some students were keen to leave early and eventually when I called the next student they weren’t there, even though the class wasn’t over. I was a little disappointed but not surprised anymore. I was able to get some useful work out of maybe 60% of them and that would have to be as good as it was going to get. I need to think about a better way to keep the ‘free’ students occupied whilst I’m busy with others. I’m still a work in progress myself. Always learning.

Something I learned today?

Nut had prepared an Akha herb that I’d never tried before. It looked a little like a mini-sized mint and tasted a little like rocket with a hint of something which I’m not quite sure of. It was nice to munch on and add to the top of the pizza.

List three of your “greatest hits” from last year.

Greatest hits….? Hmm… In fact, a quick reflection doesn’t seem to generate any greatest hits particularly and I think that is a better place to be in. Having hits or highs would also mean having lows and I’d much prefer not to have those these days. But at a push…

  1. Riding around the rice fields behind the airport was nice, especially at golden hour. I did a few trips there during the October holiday and really felt serene.
  2. Another bike ride around the same time of year, this time with Bruno and across many mountains to the Burmese border and hanging out at a country school there.
  3. Meeting, befriending and watching my new groups of students. Seeing them learn and grow even a little was very rewarding.
I took this picture because Fon brought her handmade cookies last night but I only saw them today. This is a great one of me from a picture taken just a couple of days ago. I bet I taste good too.

Amy and I went to Bruno and Nut’s for pizza dinner and Amy’s mum and dad joined too, Bruno’s invite. Despite being tired from lack of sleep I was in a good mood, even joking with Amy’s dad a little. It was quite noticeable to me that I felt different to usual and I couldn’t be too sure why?

It was a lively evening of talk, Bruno and I talking a little about European politics which I really don’t know so much about. I felt it was nice to be away from all that where we can just casually chat about things that don’t affect us directly like they used to.

Dog tired at home and into bed and wonderful vivid dreams, I woke up to pee at one point, happy knowing that I could enjoy some more lucid dreaming again before falling back into a deeper sleep. That’s one way to be positive about broken sleep I suppose!

Tonight is Amy’s last night here before heading back to Australia and I likely won’t see her again for six months. I’ll miss her but we are both happy and love each other. Time is nothing.

Baited For The Bite – 28th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

When the rain pours
Is it angry at man?
The anger addict shouts
At all the clouds he can

Looking for a reason
To again raise his voice
Practice becomes instinct
The anger addicts’ choice

Upset by words written
Baited for the bite
The anger addict screaming
That he is always right

Finally, breath runs out
Wasted time disappeared
No one ever listened
As the anger addict feared

Proved himself correct
With nothing left to say
Quietly, proudly satisfied
Happy in his own way

There is no complete life. There are only fragments. We are born to have nothing, to have it pour through our hands.

James Salter

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Dutchie, JubJib, Sheena and Khet for working hard to organise a fun lesson (scavenger hunt in the park opposite the school) for the last one of the year for their class. They even pushed me along to get going with things today. They all learned a lot about organising and planning and how throwing a bunch of people of students into the mix will likely fuck up those plans!
The best thing about today was:
The happy faces of the class when I told them we’d be doing the rest of the class in the park. They didn’t know what to expect but they were surely not disappointed when I told them to put their books away!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
As usual, these will be my classes. I think outside of those there wasn’t anything really exciting that got too wacky. In my 2/7 class Gun became particularly annoying and instead of confronting and escalating further I just tried to ignore him and dobbed him in to his homeroom teacher. I like Gun even though he’s crude, rude and lazy but he stops other students from learning and that’s something I can’t accept.
Something I learned today?
I learned that tomorrow I have to wake up at 5 am. I know that other information entered my brain today but it’s shoved somewhere at the back and right now, getting up early is what’s on my mind as I’m laying here in bed wondering when I might actually fall asleep!
Add a photo that makes you smile every time you see it.
Our first king-size mattress. It would be a while before we got a bed. Either way, Amy made claim on her part of the bed immediately.

Nicha took this picture because I was helping her and another student with some reading. Whilst I wasn’t looking she unlocked the photo app and snapped this selfie. I found it a few hours later and cracked up. Nicha’s English is very poor but she is smart and can work out ways to look as if she is able. That’s fine for now but will trip her up in the future. She’s picking up things though. I doubt if English will ever play a big part in her life but I hope she learns that learning is its own reward.

In This House – 26th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

The open door
Inviting

Fresh air and
Foreigners

(Presents under the
Tree)

Coffee fills this
Place

Two cups then
Go

*format from The Red Wheelbarrow by William Carlos Williams
Submitted to Writer’s Workshop

Every path is the right path. Anything might have been anything else and had just as much meaning to it.

Tennessee Williams

Today I’m feeling:
Happy, a little tired from noisy classes
Today I’m grateful for:
The salad seller at the market again. Amy told me she would be out for dinner when I got home so I rode off to the market not sure what I would decide to have and this time I went back to the salad which I haven’t had for a while now. It was great.
The best thing about today was:
Having fun in my classes despite the kids being noisy and lazy. I made Nam and Aoi laugh when they sometimes get angry with me pushing them. Goya was loud and hard-working and enjoying things and at the end, Gam happily stayed back to finish her work whilst I played around with Fah who was waiting for her.
In the morning I helped Dena, Nicha and Namkhing individually with some reading and sent the top 4 off to investigate and prepare for our scavenger hunt which we should have on Wednesday if all goes to plan. I think that I’ve got my mind in the right place for these kids now.
I also found out today that we have Friday and Monday off for the new year holiday. Cool!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
The kids in the morning were particularly noisy so I moved a few of them around which helped for a while. As I was trying to help them with reading and pronunciation most were just talking with each other so I stopped and told them I wouldn’t help them anymore and to record themselves reading the passage. I almost lost it but distracted myself by talking with the top 4 as described above, so at least I still felt useful. Slowly students started to come and ask for my help, realising they should have been listening before. They all did it and did it well enough in the end. There are different ways to get to the destination.
Something I learned today?
Tangmo has got a new friend and decided to bring them here tonight. I thought it was ‘Mo on the terrace but then saw it was a slightly thinner shape and when I went to open the door it ran off. Later I went out to see if it was still around when I thought I saw it in the darkness but then Tangmo ran out to me. I went to get the rope for him and then saw the other dog cautiously nearby. It wouldn’t come close but was curious. I threw the rope for ‘Mo who collected it and then ran out with it, then to chase the new dog up the road and out of sight with the rope flowing behind him from his mouth…probably never to be seen again! The rope, that is. Dopey ‘Mo will be back tomorrow wondering why I have no rope to play with anymore.
What could you let go of, for the sake of harmony?
I’m not sure that I’m holding on to anything these days. I’ve let go of most things that have caused me trouble, often, maybe too often, by avoidance or running away, but now just by forgiveness and forgetting. I don’t make other people’s problems mine anymore.
Sometimes I still hold on to the point that I should be trying to stuff as much information into my student’s heads as possible and whilst that may be suitable for one or two kids it doesn’t lead to harmony in the classroom. So I do usually let that go anyway.

I took this picture because I want to remember the view when leaving home. This house has been more of a home for me than anywhere else but still, it’s hard to appreciate it whilst living here. Homes are often created through nostalgia and the memories of everything that occurred there. One day I may look at this photo and think about all the things that I was part of here, which may as simple as reading in the hammock, eating on the terrace or managing the garden.

Moron Convention – 11th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Janky parking in entitled lots
The prize to get has got to be gots
The hustled and hustlers dancing in jitters
A microcosm of moronic critters
Overrun with amateurs, unable to discern
Anything beyond their own concern
Grown men anxious and chomping at bits
Losing their minds in explosive fits
Society and humanity seemingly forgotten
The race to the top has now reached the bottom
Used to a life full of broken noses
Shop til you drop, or at least til it closes

Embrace all obstacles as learning experiences, as means to getting stronger.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Content and tired
Today I’m grateful for:
Nong May, Amy’s cousin (?), for driving me to get coffee in Lampang. Also dad for driving on the way in the morning, and mum for paying for lunch.
The best thing about today was:
I really enjoyed driving back from Lampang for the first hour. My neck got sore after that though. I also enjoyed lucid dreams again on the way there and was amazed it was already 11am when we got there. The drive only felt like 30 minutes to me but was almost 4 hours. Also meeting the little girl doing dot-to-dot in the cafe whilst I was waiting for coffee. She was very cute and curious.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Most of the day was out of my control and I had already accepted this beforehand.
Something I learned today?
Why do I struggle to recall things at the end of the day? Does information logged in my brain stay in there? Is it useful? Does it only get activated when triggered by something relevant? I suppose that makes sense. Or am I going through days without learning anything at all?
I did learn it was Nong Fah’s birthday today, thanks to a notification in LINE!
What’s your favourite time of day?
Sunrise and golden hour are both up there. Birth and death. Why? The living and sleeping parts don’t hold the same appeal? Like the land meeting the sea is more special than being in the ocean or the middle of the land. Do special things only happen at the edges?

I took this picture because this was the pretty garden area behind the restaurant we ate lunch at in Lampang. There were some amazing mountains along the way but I was driving and couldn’t take pictures.