Failure Porn World – 6th May 2023

Everyone is looking for a laugh
To put a smile on their face
In an upside-down world
Digging down is the safest place
Pick ourselves up by putting down
Cut down all the tall poppies
Misfortune brings us all together
So that’s what everyone copies
Fortune cookie philosophers rant
How to make a million dollars
But the need for the dopamine rush
Will never make us into scholars
A promise one day it could be you
That is the star of the show
Turnover is high in failure porn world
Clicked over to the next video


Today I’m feeling:

Hot. It’s hot. This is Thailand. What did I expect? The aircon stopped working in the bedroom last night and the temperature never dropped below 28 degrees. I slept fine though. Tonight I may have to sleep with the window open and have the fan next to it, weakly sucking in cooler air from the night. In the meantime, I have to contact someone to come and fix the machine.

Today I’m grateful for:

My portable hard drives that allow me to save and move files around from one place to another. When my crusty cranky old MBP stopped recognizing one of the drives I was able to swap things around and get things running again with a freshly formatted drive. I think I may be at the point now where I just don’t need any more drives. I’ve slowed down my music consumption a lot recently and I have too many movies to ever have enough time to watch.

The best thing about today was:

A general feeling of well-being. Perhaps the only thing that really stood out was riding back from Utopia and going on a convoluted path home. The sun’s heat was like a blanket around my skin with the breeze being just enough to stop feeling crispy. I slowed down a little to savour the feeling. The mountains looked like a photograph from the 70s, all washed out due to the hazy air, enough blue sky shimmering through from above to highlight the depth.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

It was time to start a new book whilst sipping coffee at Utopia so I had a quick scan of the shelves at home. I use my Utopia time to read music biographies or music-related books. Yesterday I  finished Dave Simpson’s The Fallen. Now it was a choice between SNFU or Rollins Broken Summers. I opted for the latter. As I start reading I get back into Henry’s groove quickly and easily. He’s a maniac. I respect his attitude a lot. I see parallels with myself in his words though I’m totally softcore in comparison.
As I keep reading I realise I’ve read this before and not too long ago. I wonder whether to ditch it and swap it tomorrow. However, the strength of the writing keeps me intent to follow along as he prepares for another tour of duty. I feel compelled to bring his attitude back into my thinking as I prepare for my own lovely little war in the classroom over the next couple of weeks. I need to get back to some discipline. Cut the flabby excesses of lethargy.

Something I learned today?

I’ve seen a few videos of people telling jokes to make each other laugh and if they do they lose a point or take a drink or similar punishment. Sometimes they are fun to watch. One popped up and the thumbnail looked like a guy I vaguely knew back in Sydney so I watched it and sure enough, Rodney Todd in all his afro-hairy glory!

What is something I can’t live without?

There’s nothing beyond air, food and water. Without other things, life would certainly be uncomfortable. It’s like people who lose everything in house fires, they find that their lives still go on. I’m thinking about Kim Chi today and how sad I still feel about losing her. But here I am.

Where are you, Kim Chi? Why are you not here? I miss you so much.

Let me know your thoughts

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