Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful to have met Kru Tang. She has all the qualities of a good person and has helped me a lot.
We got that attitude! – 6th October 2019
The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #06 – 5th October 2019
Music from Faun Fables, Ruins, Unrest, Minibeast, The Deviants, Deerhoof, The Clarendonians, The Mekons, Radio Thailand, The Solid State, NoHayBandaTrio, Joe Strummer, The Jesus Lizard, Martin Cure and the Peeps and Iowa Beef Experience.
Woke up with the sun and again I’m already mentally preparing for my classes next semester. It’s good but could probably turn it down a bit!
It’s only 7am and I already achieved a small thing for today. I went for an early morning walk around the village. A lot of aunties around already selling their veggies and meats. They were all happily curious, as was I. I should try some conversation next time.
Today I will try to remember that life is brief and can be taken away at any time.
I love watching my cats around the house and garden. How lucky we are to be here together.
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful to watch the sunrise as I walked around the village this morning. Smiling monks, curious aunties, playful dogs, foggy fields.
Then the cowboy turned the gun on himself as he sang – 4th October 2019
Cats don’t judge. A cat is just a cat.
My last day of school. How do I feel? A little sad and disappointed to leave my students behind but hopeful and positive for the next school. I can visualise myself in class, prepared. Happy.
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful to the students who made me goodbye cards. I could feel how much I had affected them and what a good influence I had been. They really touched my heart.
Got to have my origin in this house of suffering – 3rd October 2019
Poisonous people are a lesson waiting to be learned. It’s a tough test and it feels like suffering. Must remain calm and clear.
In my dream, many friends appeared. They were not ones I readily recognise but I knew they were my friends.
In Sydney I felt like everyone I knew or was acquainted with in the music scene was someone I could trust. Quite naive but the feeling was real. Our scene is built on mutual respect and understanding.
Those who know me know all too well, all my sins and failings – 2nd October 2019
Got upset and angry yesterday at someone’s behaviour – that I perceived as a message towards me. I was oversensitive and reactive. I took myself away from the situation and sat by the river. I imagined the debris in the river were my hurt, anger and frustrations and watched them pass by and disappear.
I felt better.
It’s tough though.
The older you get the less you’re worth – 1st October 2019
Picture was taken a few months later when I went back for a visit.
Yesterday I told my class I was leaving. It was a little emotional – two of the students got teary. It was sad to see – those kids can’t go a whole semester with the same teacher. It did make me realise the impression I can make on students though. I hope I can work in the high school so I will still have the opportunity to see them sometimes. I know I can work in another school ok but I’m also dreading it a little.
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful to Amy for helping me through all the tough situations since we met. Many things I can deal with and help her with but there have been times when she had been so wonderful and supportive. I know she gets frustrated with me sometimes too but at the end of the day, she is always there for me. I love her so much.
Weight: 83.1kg
Resting heart rate: 50
No windows, no ceiling or floor – 30th September 2019
Woke up just before my alarm. In my dream, I was trying to enter a password for something but kept getting it wrong. Things are fairly normal at home. Normal is good. Why I write this is because all our cats are happy at the moment.
All the humans are happy too.
My last week at school. Very relaxed. Not sure about what is coming up next – well, actually, I am. It’s holiday time. LIve in the moment. Your job doesn’t define you.
Gratitude Journal
Playing sport with some of the school kids made me smile, even when I fell over and hurt myself! I smiled and laughed with Amy a lot this week, feeling better about things in general. I smiled coming to school knowing that a holiday is coming and I will be leaving this environment. I smiled at Kim Chi and Cap chasing each other around the house. I smiled when the big dead lizard made Amy jump a mile into the air!
9th Mar 2021 – When I think about working at schools in Thailand I can’t help but believe that I am there for the student’s education and I care more about them than the ‘adults’ working there, who I can generally take or leave. The Thai staff at the schools I have worked at have a different agenda entirely as far as I can tell.
We got that attitude! – 29th September 2019
Gratitude Journal
I’m happy and grateful to have people who care about me all over the world.
7th Mar 2021 – Today I added the post for 23rd October 1994 where I called back to my friends in England that I was missing very much. My collection of friends and acquaintances around the world has increased substantially since then and I am grateful to them all, no matter how minor our connections may have been.
The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #05 – 28th September 2019
Music from All Right The Captain, Plastic Blues Band, Phleg Camp, Replacements, Tanjaret Daghet, Sweetheart, Mike Watt, Flin Flon, Drive Like Jehu/BlackPink, Keukhot, Birdsongs of the Mesozoic, Ruins, Free Salamander Exhibit, The Halo Benders, The Red Krayola, Eat Avery’s Bones, Idiot Flesh, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282.
Gratitude Journal
Thank you to me for always growing and learning. I know it has been hard but it got my where I am today.
I’m grateful for our friend Baew who always shows us kindness and caring. I’m thankful she is in our lives.
We got that attitude! – 27th September 2019
Even though a new job feels like it may involve more work, it is a relief to leave this current job.
When I think back to my other jobs I can identify a person who made life difficult in many of them. Sometimes I could handle it well but I have a great sense of injustice with many of them. I can’t control their personalities but find it difficult to control my own reactions.
I will try to improve.
Gratitude Journal
I am grateful for my mother and the respectful characteristics she instilled in me. She taught me to be independent and showed me how to do it.
27th Feb 2021 – It’s inevitable we start to see our parents in our own actions when we are older and have stopped fighting against them to find our own way. I was lucky my mum was a good one. I sometimes think about my old friends and their parents and wonder what quirks they now enact.
1994ever 