*The Week That Was – 20th February 1984

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Record of the week: DOA – Bloodied But Unbowed (again), Middle Class Fantasies – Publikum, Minutemen – (anything)

20th February 1984
Burd and Rupe came round with rest of booze. Went to Mr Houldey’s – I did his drying up. Went to Shirl’s. Went home. Recorded some Bloodstains. Went to Mr Houldey’s again. Pissed around in Dandy’s room. Made some pancakes for them. Nicked her pyjamas. Recorded some more – can’t remember much else. DOA.

21st February 1984
Woke up at 4. Had a drink. Went back to bed. Woke up 6. Had a drink and squeezed some zits. Got up 11. Took Dandy’s pyjamas back. Started Bloodstains booklet. Listening to Crass. Giving up fags, booze etc. Written letter to Zoe. Feeling good today.

22nd February 1984
Got up 11. Had a bath. Had a wank. Listened to some Crass. Decided to stop getting Sounds. Went to see Muz and saw Burt and Jasp. Me and Muz went to Houldey’s, found out there was a party at Jo Holloway’s so went there later at night. Had some good times with Tanya and Mandy and had some bad times with Jo, Vicky and mum and dad. Anyway, DOA. Wrote letter to Zoe again.

23rd February 1984
Muz and Scott and Burt woke me up at 10.30. Went to Queen’s Copse. Saw Annabel on the way. Got done by. the Forestry Commission. Came back. They went home. Went to Gaunts later. Had a go on Muz’s computer at Football Manager. Went up to Annabels’ with Muz, Scott and Burt. Came back – pissed around on Muz’s computer some more. Went home.

24th February 1984
Went to Wimborne to go to dentists. Saw Liz J so decided to stay in Wimborne. Was with her and Jason most of the day. Went into the Yew Tree three times for some tea. Pissed about all day. Came back on the bus.Had to give Andy Froud a lift to Horton on moped as bus didn’t go to Horton. Went to Muz’s and we went to Houldey’s.

25th February 1984
Woke up 12.30. Went to Muz’s 1.30. Got to First Division in Football Manager. Lost FA Cup Final to Brighton. Came back 4.35, took dog for walk. Played with cat. Had tea. Went to Muz’s 6.30. Decided to go to party. His mum gave us some money. Went to Wimborne. Bought some booze to add to the wine. Saw Stroud who was going so we followed him to Pamphill. We decided not to go in so we came back to my place and got snotted. Fell asleep watching a film – according to mum.

26th February 1984
Woke up 12. Had some lovely food. I was fucking starving for some reason. Played some records while doing Maths homework – what a bore – maths that is. Thinking about becoming a vegan. Going down Muz’s later, see what state he’s in. Had a bath. Had a wank. Listening to DOA again. Went to Muz’s. He wouldn’t come out/I couldn’t go in – doing his Maths homework – yawn. Came home. Went to find Chris on my moped – couldn’t find him so came home and watch the film – pretty good. God knows how I’m going to get up tomorrow.

A Piece Of Paper – 15th February 1984

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All the songs on a piece of paper
Writing about my extravagant caper
And of my hate for this system
School, army, law – I’m no Christian

29th May 2023 – A succinct list of hated things. Or was I already aware that everything I was listening to and writing myself was about the same things over and over? I don’t think I was that self-aware yet. I do remember my mum asking me to stop listening to such angry and depressing music but my contradictory self denied that it made me feel depressed. She may have been right but I felt it was important at the time to be learning about things worked out there in the real world, which I was still very far away from.

*The Week That Was – 13th February 1984

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Record of the week: Crass – Don’t Get Caught

13th February 1984
Last week of term. Physics – fuckin’ laugh as usual. Maths – fuckin’ really shitty – did a test. Lunchtime played football. Detention’s come through Wed and Fri. Social Studies – boring. H.E. – not too bad. Made a quiche. Falling in love with Ange (huh!). Got letter from Zoe – quite interesting. Hill Street Blues was ace.

14th February 1984
R.E – ok. P.S.C.E. – boring. Maths – shit. Business Studies – boring. Lunchtime – played football again – had a laugh. English – quite good – bit of a piss around. P.E. – fucked around playing basketball. Got a crash helmet so went out on ‘ped for a while. Watching ice skating at the mo’. Torville and Dean win.

15th February 1984
H.E. – made apple turnovers – again. Physics – fuckin’ ace laugh. Me, Burd, Rupe and Jim are organising a pissup on Monday at my house. Jim’s backed out ‘cos he doesn’t want to come.’ – god knows why. Bernice probably. Detention – wrote up smoking leaflet. R.E. – ok. English – reading. Business Studies – ok. Maths – shitface wouldn’t let us out til after the bell – wanker. Andy called – seemed quite happy. Minder was good. Football tonight – Liverpool vs Walsall 2nd leg. Was played yesterday 2-0 to Liverpool.

16th February 1984
Art – Mr Hough wasn’t here. P.E. – slaughtered Chesh at badminton. Played football at lunch. Jane Seabright was making enquiries ie she wants to go out with me. Social Studies – flew by. Business Studies – pissed off with Bell – the cow. English – didn’t do much. Got Kathryn’s (that girl on the bus to Bournemouth) telephone number – so rang her up and had a strange conversation. Rang Jane and she was giving me some bull.

17th February 1984
Took in MDC cover – shut everyone up. English – talking about fashion. H.E. – shit. Maths – shit. Detention at lunch. Art – Mr Hough was pissed so I sobered him up with MDC cover. Business Studies – boring. Physics – nothing special. Went down Gaunts on moped – had a fucking ace laugh. Got some of Murray’s wine for Monday. Went to St James school with Muz and Burt.- had a laugh in the tube thingy. Did a flame thrower thing with a bike pump and some petrol out of my bike – nearly ran out of petrol so used some of Muz’s mower petrol.

18th February 1984
Supposed to see Rupe on the bus but he didn’t show – rung up, said was ill. Bought the new Crass single and plenty of booze for Monday – let’s hope everything goes to plan. Fish was pissing me off a bit cos he was a bit drunk and acting a bigger prat than usual. He’s off to Cirencester on a job tomorrow. Got chucked out of Arts Centre for allegedly smoking dope – it was only a fag stinker(?). Just looked under my bed – fucking cat’s piss. Good film – The Reincarnation of Peter Proud.

18th February 1984
Got up. Ate. Rode into Wimborne to meet Chesh – he said he couldn’t afford to come over on Monday – so he isn’t. Annabel and co may be coming over as well. Went to Simon’s for a while. Came home. Chris came round on his moped. Went down to the club. Met Burdett and Rupert, who should be coming. Brought Rupert’s drinks back. Saw Chris in Hinton Martell so left my bike there and he brought me back on his moped.

(You’re The) Afterbirth Of Life – 8th February 1984

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You’re worth nothing cos no one wants you
Is it your fault? Do you want to
Change to be with the flowing crowd
But you can be – keep yourself proud
– Change for the crowd

Got no friends, nowhere to go
You can’t go to the disco
Cos you stick out like a sore thumb
If anyone sees you, you’re gonna be done
– The afterbirth of life

Do you want friends or to be alone?
Life is more fun on your own
“If no one trusts you, why trust them?”
Twisted philosophy with one problem
– Alone with yourself

Can you stand it? Do you want to?
Who do you wanna be – me or you?

*The Week That Was – 6th February 1984

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Record of the week: DOA – Bloodied But Unbowed

6th February 1984
Knackered. Physics was alright. Maths was totally shit. Lunchtime was boring. I was depressed by now. Social Studies made it worse. As did H.E. Bus home was alright. Hill Street Blues was good – cheer me up. Chucked Andy out of the group.

7th February 1984
R.E. – no teacher. P.S.C.E. – Jim’s shit. Maths – shit. B. Studies – shit. English – good, right piss around. P.E. – basketball – quite a laugh. Told Simon about Andy – no practice Sunday. Grange Hill was good. Went out on bike, down the road and round about. Looks like a good film on later ‘Visions of Death’. Football on instead.

8th February 1984
H.E. – made some bread. Physics – did a mock practical – quite good. Spent 80p on sweets. R.E. was ok. English was ok. B. Studies was boring. Maths was shit. Went out on my ped again. Didn’t do much else really at all at all at all at all at all….

9th February 1984
Art – Ok. P.E. – slaughtered Chesh at badminton. Social Studies – not bad. Business Studies – cut my thumb on a typewriter. English – ok. Fuck all to do at home at the moment. Reading Paul’s fanzine at the mo’. Ped just ran out of petrol or something.

10th February 1984
Did my English exam today – don’t think I did too well. English was a laugh. About 30 of us got caught smoking today. Burdet was lippy to Brooke and has got to see Crud. H.E. – boring. Maths – shit. Played football at lunch – good laugh. Art was ok. Business Studies was ok. Physics was alright. Jim’s decided to go vegetarian. Quite an eventful day so far. Watching telly now – well, there’s not much else to do.

11th February 1984
Got up at 8.15. Went to Poole. Saw Burd. Saw Lisa, Justin etc. Got some vivisection posters. Bought DOA LP. Met Paul around 3.20 and didn’t do much. Went to Arts Centre with Fish, Gilly and Paul. Quite a laugh. Came back home – played records, watched telly. Watched the horror movie – was fuckin’ shit. Talked til about 2.30.

12th February 1984
Woke up 10.30. Played records. Played darts and cards with Paul. Didn’t do a lot. Took dog for a walk. Took Paul back to Wareham. Not a lot on telly tonight. Read book most of the night. Couldn’t stay up for Sgt Bilko.

Search Switches South – 2nd February 1984

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The lost boats, the lost lives
Drowning souls as waves dive
Seeking refuge at the ocean’s depth
Falling in the hope of rest
Search switches south for the lonely men
Family still hope to see them again
Never found, not a ring or hair
Cos they floated north and no one did care

27th May 2023 – I was tempted to rewrite that last line but decided to leave it as written in 1984. I was inspired by learning about the Bauhaus song Terror Couple Kill Colonel which was written based on a newspaper headline. It’s not easy to find a newspaper these days to look for inspiration and looking online for similar doesn’t usually occur to me. Still, inspiration is everywhere.

*The Week That Was – 30th January 1984

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Record of the week: Aheads -Minuteman, Self Abuse – Batman (Live)
Song of the month – Confessions Of Sin – Loose (Live)

30th January 1984
Didn’t do much today. Physics was quite good – writing for the Bloodstains. Maths was shit. Social Studies was depressing as usual. H.E. was boring – god what am I gonna do? Rung Justin and Paul – had a chat. Hill Street Blues is on again. Nearly finished my book. Got letter from Zoe.

31st January 1984
Not a lot happened today – boring eh? Patchet had a go at me and Kas (?) in R.E. PSCE was boring. Maths was shit, what’s new? B. Studies – yet (?). English was interesting. Had the Bloodstains book taken by Mr King. P.E. was alright. Doing a tape of the Clash for Liz at the moment. Grange Hill was interesting, Glenroy having a go and sticking up for the poor. Had a bath and here I am. Alas, Smith and Jones is on tonight, it was pretty good. Not a lot else.

1st February 1984
Had a bit of fun today. H.E. made a Lemon Delight which we all scoffed. Physics – I took some incense in and Haywire thought it was dope and nearly took me to the Head of Year. Nearly got caught smoking with Vince by Clarke. R.E. did nothing. English – wrote some more Bloodstains. Business Studies – watched a rainbow. Maths was shit. Hell Comes To Your House Part II has been released. Now I’m here and that’s the end. Finished Time Enough For Love.

2nd February 1984
Didn’t do a lot in Art. Slaughtered Chesh in squash. Got bored in Social Studies. Business Studies was boring. English was alright. Saw Mandy Richardson get stuck in a bin. Nicked Liz’s scarf. Might be buying a moped tonight. See you later. Did buy it – it’s jolly cool. Amanda rang – so I told about the gigs. Managed to scrounge a day off school next Thursday to go and see Conflict and 15 other groups down Bournemouth. Started The Satanist.

3rd February 1984
Did fuck all in English. H.E. was boring. Maths was shit. Art was alright. B. Studies was boring. Physics was ace. Heyward wanted volunteers for detention so me and Rat got it. Mine’s next Thursday when I won’t be there. Chris Frost came round and we went round on it. Went down to the chippie and had an accident with it. Went down Hinton Martell, then the club. Bought some fags, saw Carly then came back. Not a lot else.

4th February 1984
Went into Poole. Was with Lisa – Siomn’s girlfriend, til we met Simon. Saw Snowy – the tramp. Then caught the coach to Ilminster – was a laugh. The pub there wouldn’t let us in but everyone managed to get a drink. The gig was good. Self Abuse were their usual self. Breakout were good. We left at 11.30, got back to Paul’s about 1 and watched some videos. Had some of the most silly conversations ever. Andy was getting on everyone’s nerves and I’m thinking of chucking him out of the group.

5th February 1984
Got up at 11.00. Found out last night that the Conflict gig is off. Came back at 12.30, got to Wimborne about 1.10 then came back. Borrowed a load of fanzines off Paul including Flipside. Had a bath. Had a wank. And now I’m here. Fuckin’ knackered. Cat slept on my bed til 1.45 am then decided he wanted to get out.