Tag: dVerse

The White Torch – 22nd December 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 11 Comments

Like a ray of moonlight through the window
Sweet words fall like dew drops from petals
Connected by vapour pulled through the air
The briefest touch sends hearts spinning

Pure eyes emanating light, lit large
Her grace flows forth like a stanza
This tree in blossom fights against her sorrows
A brief affection, two bodies made into one

A love cleansed by tears remains pure
A single thought makes it so
The flowers hidden in darkness
Cannot hide that held in our hearts

The universe trembles to this sweet music
This delicious dance felt for the first time
Love and fear fills the heart with joy
The obstacles of doubt surmounted
– Every minute now, a year of love

Mangled from the titular chapter of The Broken Wings by Khalil Gibran and inspired by the attached picture of an old student of mine. I read this chapter and saw the picture on the same day and combined, they both took me back to enjoy that soft sick feeling in the stomach and chest of teenage love.

3rd Mar 2024 – Submitted to Weekly Prompts Colour Challenge
16th Aug 2024 – Submitted to dVerse OLN

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that from today the daylight hours will get longer again. I say this as I saw the sun appear above the mountain this morning filling the sky with its orange light.

I’m anxious and overthinking again at the moment. I need to overcome this feeling somehow. Yesterday I talked with Champ and I could feel he understood my frustrations with school but it became obvious that if anything happens down the line, such as more complaints from the parents, then he will not support me. Not necessarily by choice but just to protect himself. This is kinda disappointing really but I guess it shows me where I stand.

I think I’ll make some changes with some small things in my life again to give me back more of a feeling of control again. I feel not strong enough to support my own beliefs, not arrogant enough to feel superior, not flexible enough to bend to the will of others.

The nail that sticks up gets hammered down.

There’s something to be said for thoughtless manual labour. Weak. Time feels like it’s running away but it’s not real – why am I insisting on making it real? Is this my midlife crisis? Gotta self-talk my way out of it.

Shadows – 1st November 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 7 Comments

Within this oppressive system
The dividing line, it grows
The wealthy control the time
Whilst we’re living in the shadows

Try to climb this shit ladder
But the dividing line always grows
A blind eye turned towards
Those living in the shadows

How did it get to be
That the dividing line, it grows?
And the ninety-nine percent
Remains living in the shadows

There is no vision of caring
As the dividing line, it grows
The underclass just eats itself
Living in the shadows

The one percent destroyed the world
And the dividing line is gone
No one left to remember the names
Of the ones who claimed they’d won

Inspired by a classic late 80s Peter Milligan story ‘Shadows’ originally printed in 2000AD
29th Mar 2024 – Submitted to OLN 359 at dVerse

First day of the new semester and everything is the usual mess but I’m more used to it now and can accept it. Had a good chat with Champ in the afternoon about his beliefs about the future of Thailand. He isn’t happy with the current system but is optimistic about the elections next year. I don’t think it will be much of a change but I also can’t get a feel for the mood of the country.

I moved back into the teacher’s room and sat next to George again. He is still only politely communicating with me and won’t look me in the eye. What I have noticed more about myself is that the things that I read about stoicism and thinking, I’m always framing it into a comparison with me and George. He is good at many things that I would hope to emulate but I’m always classifying it as insincere when it comes from him. I don’t need to be thinking about how what I’m reading relates to him – I need to be concentrating on how it relates to me.

I do feel that I am behaving more as myself these days as opposed to trying to fit in with everyone there, to keep a good vibe. I don’t know how to describe this properly. The vibe is good as I am. I am polite and enquiring and take part in work discussions. I don’t, or no longer, really take part in what I guess could be called bonding exercises. I don’t really feel a need to bond with people on a superficial level. Playing Uno or Kahoot together is ok every now and then and maybe brings a good feeling at that moment but I feel like there’s no depth to it.

Sure, I may not be good at connecting deeply with people myself but I really detest the time wasted on superficial connections. I don’t want to be friends with everyone or care if people I don’t really like don’t like me either, but I will make the effort to make deeper connections with someone I feel great affinity with.

That’s difficult with this group of people due to language issues but I am interested in Champ’s values and thinking as he also seems to be interested in deeper concerns than having time for another round of Uno.

Have I talked myself around? Perhaps not yet. My thinking is something I’m still working on and something I will always need to work on.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the long sleep and pleasant dreams I had last night whilst it rained so hard.

Weight: 76.6kg
Resting heart rate: 52

Sensational Shoes – 16th May 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 9 Comments

These shoes are half a size too small
My toes ache from being squashed
I thought they’d stretch with time
But it seems that it’s just money lost

So I’m gonna give you away
Make you a charitable donation
Maybe you’ll be someone else’s
Sartorial fashion sensation

29th May 2024 – Submitted to dVerse – fashion

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the web archives available online. They help me put together bits and pieces of my past and remind me of all the good work I did. Sometimes I look at those things and I can’t believe I did them. It makes me feel proud of my achievements even if they are minor in the scheme of things.

Fruit Salad – 2nd June 1993

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 9 Comments

The real banana said “You’re an imposter” – she was the apple of his eye. The yellow-skinned imposter smiled. His face twisted like he’d just sucked a lemon.

“No I’m not” he objected. It was their first date. He had sucked her dry. Once a grape, now a raisin.

The man with the pineapple haircut interjected “Excuse me. I don’t think the cream and cottage cheese were necessary in such large amounts.” He thought the imposter was a pervert. He wasn’t wrong. The cream was whipped.

The imposter slipped on the banana. He fell – it was a peach! Caught in the act. Plum-dumb.

Still life isn’t a bowl of cherries.

2nd Aug 2024 – Submitted to dVerse OLN – just for fun!