Til The End – 23rd November 2022

Make sure to watch til the end
This video needs the stats
Nothing happens at that point
As you can see within the chats
But make sure to watch til the end
Cos this video needs to go viral
A dollar for every ad served
Within this ever-downward spiral
Make sure to watch til the end
If you really want to laugh
Forget about the time you’ve wasted
Cutting your life in half
Make sure to watch til the end
Scroll and pause, pause and scroll
You’re the product in this game
And the devil wants your soul
So make sure you watch til the end…

The foundations of a free country is that your freedom to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.

Ryan Holiday

Today I’m feeling:
Reasonably happy.
Today I’m grateful for:
The old auntie at the market that made an old-style Thai dessert that is hard to come across. It’s a little like Japanese mochi, made with sticky rice and flour and other things I don’t recognise.
The best thing about today was:
Explaining some work to a couple of students and seeing the joy of understanding on their faces when it clicked for them. Small steps. Interested students are a teacher’s pleasure. Uninterested students are impossible to get through to and those moments of understanding are far fewer with them. So even a poorer student that shows interest is preferred.
Daily thought
Who is someone living that you admire?
I’ve been thinking about this off and on all day and as was commented on where I found this question, it is much easier to come up with a person that is dead. Why is that? A finished story perhaps. A life that no longer can be spoiled… I admire many of my musician friends, just for their abilities to create music that sparks me. This can apply to artists I don’t know too but the connection feels vaguer these days. This admiration is not necessarily for who these people are but for things they created, though there is a strong connection in the qualities of patience and persistence amongst other things. If I have admiration for who a person is then that would be Amy. She has her ups and downs as much as anyone but in general, is a happy person whose positivity is seen by most and I’m sure has helped guide her through life with good results. I admire her attitude. I’m not like that, not like her in that way. I wish I could be but I just can’t. It’s one of the reasons I want to be with her though. She’s a counterbalance for me.
What’s your best advice for teenagers?
The best advice is what I have learned through reading about Stoicism and understanding the dichotomy of control. As I am teaching teenagers at the moment this often comes up for them in learning about dealing with relationships and situations. It is always something I have to remind myself about every day though. I think I’ll make that a daily question for myself from tomorrow.

I took this picture because this is typical of my students in class. Today I laughed with them but actually, I feel disappointed for them. The environment is just not conducive to learning.

Twatter – 7th November 2022

Smash them in the shitter
Fry their dicks in batter
Friends of Gary Glitter
Fuck ’em, they don’t matter
Freedom, guns and fuck yous
The new intellectual debate
Pretending to be news
In the amphitheatres of late

You must always respect those who struggle, even if they are defeated.

from Burmese Moons by Sophie Ansel

Today I’m feeling:
Today I’m grateful for:
Trying to engage some of the ‘bad’ girls in my class and able to draw them into enjoying finding solutions or seeing how to think about something in a different way.
The best thing about today was:
Catching up on some things during the three-and-a-half-hour break between classes. Each day of the week has a different schedule that I can utilise in different ways. Mondays will be catch-up days.
Daily thought
Do you rule over yourself?
I try. But there are some things that I don’t wish to give up that just to feel that I do rule over myself. For instance, I take a mix of sertraline, tramadol and kratom which keeps me very well-balanced and in a good state of mind. I understand that it would be preferable to be able to maintain that balance without these things but I’m happy to let them rule over me for now.
What are three things you couldn’t live without?
How to answer this? Air, food, water? Or, really there’s nothing that I couldn’t live without? I enjoy the things I have in my life but if I didn’t have them I could still live. So, I guess I could think of the question like this – what are three things you prefer not to live without. Maybe that’s easy too. Amy, books, music. If I could have four then I would add cats.

I took this picture because on our bike ride on Saturday Bruno and I ended up in Doi Hua Mae Kham and rode around this developing village with freshly laid concrete. The format of the panorama doesn’t show quite how steep the road is or how spectacular the views were (unless you zoom in a little).

You Won’t Believe Number Four – 16th October 2022

Here’s a list of things you must see
There’s something here to set you free
And you won’t believe number one
Something no one else has ever done
If that really doesn’t tickle your fancy
Number two will surely make you antsy
And number three has so much more
But you’ll never believe number four
Scroll on through to five and six
You’ll start to see these amazing tricks
Manipulations to make you laugh and lol
To make sure the way on the infinite scroll

One can only live while one is intoxicated with life; as soon as one is sober it is impossible not to see that it is all a mere fraud and a stupid fraud! That is precisely what it is…it is simply cruel and stupid.

Leo Tolstoy, A Confession

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and contemplative
Today I’m grateful for:
The gardeners. Whenever they come they will appear here. They do all the hard work that I’m lazy to do and they can have it done quickly. I wonder if I would ever be in a position to hire a full-time gardener or maid or similar, would I actually do it? It seems like a weird thing to do though there are actually people who would appreciate the opportunity. One of Amy’s mum’s friends has two ‘workers’ though she does own and run a substantial property with guest houses. It just seems strange that you would be the boss of your house and get your staff to do the actual work. Cooking cleaning or gardening etc…
The best thing about today was:
Picking up the guitar after a three-day break, almost stopping after only seven minutes, carrying on and then realizing an hour had gone by.
Write about your work/life balance.
My work/life balance feels perfect at the moment. I’m loving being on holiday right now but I also love being in the middle of another semester. I love my time at school and away from it. I rush to get to school and I rush to get home. It’s great.

I took this picture because these ‘fruit’ from our palm trees caught my eye this morning as I opened the gate after walking back from Utopia. They remind me of music and dancing somehow. In this mono edit, they still pop. A few hours after this the grass was cut and the garden tidy again.

Death By Laundry – 11th May 2022

Who wants to watch the world a-tumble?
Turned on by private words now shared
The world, a worthless judge and jury
A cult of celebrity being compared
Wars aren’t felt when kept abroad
Out of sight and out of mind
Every channel, a meaningless opinion
Wash. Rinse. Repeat. Rewind.

People are strange; they are constantly angered by trivial things, but on a major matter like totally wasting their lives, they hardly seem to notice.

Charles Bukowski

The Uninvited – 3rd April 2022

Stuck in a bubble of Twitter chatter
Angry at things that hardly matter
Guard against drama and distraction
Uninvited guests don’t need a reaction

It’s sometimes said that life is a precious gift but I wonder if that’s the best metaphor. Is it better to understand one’s life as a loan? A loan that can be called in at any time, sometimes with no warning at all.

David Loy

Winning In The Attention Colosseum – 8th March 2022

You got there first
Tweeted it out
Smugly watching
Everyone shout
Follower explosion
You, the reliable source
Never involved
In meaningful intercourse
Keyboard warrior
Promoted to king
Yet an empty bag
Is all that you bring

If people remembered all of the Significant Events they had forgotten in recent years, they would perhaps realise that they were actually not that ‘signicant’ at all.

Mark Manosn

A Magic Trick – 26th January 2022

A theatre in which to participate
A groupthink in which to integrate
Share no thoughts, share no feeling
Just a picture of instant appealing
A fantasy completely documented
A world that you yourself invented
Within that mirror, behind the screen
A hamster wheel forever unseen
A like or love with each clickety-click
Buying more will do the trick
The magic hat, a rabbit appears
A wave of the wand to dry your tears
Ocean sunsets with glorious wives
A time to remember for all your lives
Yet forgotten as you endlessly feed
And try to satisfy your doomscrolling need

The meaning of life is nested within the set terms of our own mortality.

Nick Cave