Tag: Cake

The Modal Headline – 25th November 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Learning what to ignore
Can lead to learning more
Is this really news?
It may be just for views

Does the banner fright me?
Is it true? It might be!
You must stand up to defend
Cos this could be the end

Any should or would
Could be understood
What it means to kill
It will, it will!

Any headline and byline using modal verbs can safely be ignored as news.

Today I’m feeling:

A bit anxious and overexcited for some reason. I woke up, did exercise and everything, all feeling good but then something compelled me to drive fast to work when it really wasn’t that necessary.

Once at school, I relaxed and enjoyed chatting with the students and my first class was fine. The second, though (grade 8s), was very frustrating with kids playing dumb, sleeping or distracting others.

I gave up and set them a small task and waited for them to complete it so they could go. The kids playing up didn’t bother and rather than getting frustrated, I just let them do what they want.

I shouldn’t stress myself over it.

Health:

Physical: 8
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

One of the ladies in the office where the photocopier is. I didn’t bring any paper with me and it soon ran out in the machine. I went into the office and asked if they had more, but the first two replies were negative.

I kinda shrugged ‘ok’ and went back in to get my bag, but another lady followed me and pulled out a fresh slab of A4 from a box (so they obviously knew that they had some but didn’t want to supply it). I was grateful for her help.

We are a school that wastes tons of paper printing nonsense every day, yet isn’t keen on its teachers printing out worksheets!

The best thing about today was:

My frustrating morning class made me take some time to write up some new lessons this afternoon in the teacher’s room.

From there, I could see George teaching in the room opposite and I was surprised when the students started leaving, almost 40 minutes early.

I’m not sure whether to be bothered by him not teaching his full-length classes (he always arrives late to class too) or to figure that I should relax myself more in my own classes. I know I should give myself the opportunity to chill about it but also feel an obligation to do my best for my students.

Anyway, the day provided me with some inspiration as I put together some slides and did some printing.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My mood was a bit up and down again today and I’m thinking to go back to my full dose of sertraline again. It’s not worth feeling like this just to try and stop taking it, really, with the only purpose to see if I can.

I have a half tomorrow and then will go back to a full pill again on Wednesday.

Something I learned today?

As I was going to my first class in the morning, I found Baipad talking with Cake. I didn’t know that they knew each other but they met during the last time they had scout week.

I told Baipad why I thought Cake was the smartest student I’ve had the pleasure of teaching and advised to stay around with her if and when she can.

I took this picture because Cap has secured a new spot, for a while, at least. Could he be a bookshop cat? I don’t think so.

Of Clay – 20th April 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The philosophy museum is empty

Its concepts all on display
Our idols enjoy five minutes
Our heroes constructed of clay

But when you wish away the bad
You’ll wash away the good
*The fool thinks he leads
He’s clearly misunderstood

Beyond all the shootings stars
Who are getting down and dirty
Time to sacrifice yourself
To become a god at thirty

Our idols had their time
Reconstruct our heroes of clay
The philosophy museum is open
Its concepts all on display

*quote from Tolstoy. Partly inspired by Existential Comics #546. Submitted to NaPoMo.

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good. Did some exercise again and thankful for it as I can feel my lazy muscles trying hard to pull my body together.

Today I’m grateful for:

Getting out of the house for a day as Amy suddenly came up with the idea to drive to Toeng, so after coffee, we set off, ate huge prawns in Toeng, cake in a rice field cafe somewhere, dropped by to see Wan in Chiang Khong, up to Chiang Saen for some snack shopping in the walking street, and finally a Maekhong riverside fish dinner before getting home 9 hours after leaving.

It was good to be out, but I’m looking forward to tomorrow and staying in!

The best thing about today was:

Having a quick video call with Hayden before our lunch was served.  He’d just come off a 20-hour shift with one of his difficult clients but seemed pretty chipper.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy is pre-menstrual so whilst she was pretty good today she also got a bit wild every now and then.

Something I learned today?

Crispus Attucks was an American whaler, sailor, and stevedore of African and Native American descent, who is traditionally regarded as the first person killed in the Boston Massacre, and as a result, the first American killed in the American Revolution.

I took this picture because…. cake! The photo was better than the cake.

Bare Hearts – 7th January 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Running barefoot along the beaches
A meditation and reflection unspoken
The past master no longer teaches
To prepare for the bare hearts broken

Knowing everything and nothing too
Knowing that something must be learned
As bare feet and bare hearts must do
The future must be earned

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions
21st Jun 2024 – Submitted to Word of the Day Challenge

Today I’m feeling:

Tired, relaxed and lazy again.  Today is a repeat episode of yesterday pretty much.  Not excited, not unhappy.

Today I’m grateful for:

The cake that Amy came back with at lunchtime, presumably from Nong Oh who she was out with.  A light chiffon with cashews in a thick caramel topping.  It was nice in that it didn’t taste as sweet as it looked.

The best thing about today was:

Cleaning up the last pile of junk on the floor of my room.  There is stuff there that is inspiring me to think of new lesson plans so I hung on to quite a bit of it.  The floor is clear but I still need to go through the stuff on the shelves and that will mean more inspiration and ideas and then a concern about lack of time to execute all those ideas.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In the scheme of things, I did very little today.  If there was anything out of my control then it had no lasting resonance with my memory.

Something I learned today?

From watching the interview with Nathan Rich I discovered that you can inject whisky into your veins and get drunk from it.  I mean, it makes sense but it seems like a stupid thing to do when you can just drink the stuff! 

That guy has certainly had an interesting life and we share a weird connection in that we both got into computing as a way to raise ourselves up in the world (and both into punk and then with interests in China).

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Today was all about Amy and being sympathetic to her situation with the unfolding drama therein.

Was the killing of hundreds of hairy worms on the avocado tree a good or vile act?

Tell about something you love doing that you’re terrible at. And tell about something you really do not like doing that you’re great at.

For the former, I guess it would be playing guitar, though I don’t really think that I am terrible.  I’m just not good.

For the latter maybe Maths, though again, I wouldn’t say that I was great at it either.  In fact, if I think about it I actually like learning about Maths but have an aversion to it because of a long-held hatred of my high school Maths teacher.

Even then, I’m over it (I should be because it was 40 years ago!) so I need to think of something else here.

It’s tough. I don’t consider myself particularly great at anything and at my age now I’m not really doing anything that I don’t like doing anymore.

I took this picture because this pup is cute and loves me.

Tabula Rasa – 24th November 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Born empty, yet complete
A whole thing of being
A clean slate to begin
Eyes open for the seeing
Entropy now underway
Holes puncture the slate
Until the whole is empty
No longer able to create

5th Jun 2024 – Submitted to FOWC with Fandango

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty reasonable, though exercise was a bit of a struggle this morning. Just a tiny tickly dry cough left and there’s little pain from the tooth extraction but just a little bit of a weird feeling in my mouth.

Today I’m grateful for:

A kind of family dinner at Amy’s folk’s house. I ate as soon as I arrived after school as I had only had a few spoonfuls of yoghurt in the morning. Amy rode out to get me some fish congee which was what the dentist suggested for a couple of days whilst the hole in my gum heals. Everyone else was running around preparing food and then ate outside but I ran inside because of the hundreds of busy mosquitoes.

The best thing about today was:

It seems more common these days to not have anything stand out in particular but just to be generally having a good day all day. This is reflective of a more positive and healthy attitude all round.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In my last class one of my students advised me that everyone had to be out of the building by 4.30 because the pest control people were coming to spray. 

I don’t know why it is that we have to wait for our students to inform us of what is going on in the school but I’ve gotten used to it by now. 

Something I learned today?

Sadly Kru Fang will leave our school on Monday which is such a shame as she has been the most helpful and friendly teacher of all in our building. I like her a lot. Nothing stays the same.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Despite feeling tired during the day I was still happy to accept Amy’s message that we would eat at her parent’s for dinner.

Arriving after finishing school, Amy directed me to walk Leo and though I was hoping to relax for a minute I got over it quickly and let Leo pull me along as he snuffled in any interesting pile of leaves and dirt that he came across. He gives few clues about what is going on his head.

After finishing dinner I was keen to get home but Amy needed some baking ingredient that we needed to go back into the city for. I took it in my stride, even after the first shop we tried being closed and the second shop not having any stock and rushing to the third shop before it closed where finally she got it. I was satisfied with a nice soft cake that I found at the second stop and I think that kept me going.

I sent congratulations to Funfai for more medal-winning tennis and get-wells to Nut, Lin and Baipad.

I sent supportive messages to Aum and Ice because I saw them both enjoying my class of tongue twisters and helping other students.

I managed to go another day without taking a picture. I guess I had opportunities here and there but I did spend a lot of time either in class or in House and distracted with other things like reading or studying Thai.

I feel a little like I’m accustomed now to my environment here in Thailand. It’s not as novel as it once was though I do still appreciate what is around me. I need to get on my bike again soon and go exploring.

Said And Done – 9th November 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I’ve no comment on what I remember
The past is done and gone
I don’t understand where I am now
It’s not where I belong

And everything that was said
Never made a difference anyway
But at least I felt better
That I had something to say

A thousand slogans were chanted
Marching fists into the air rose
When everything was said and done
Still here the jungle grows

Today I’m feeling:

Happy after a positive day yesterday. With no classes again this morning I could just enjoy the first couple of hours of the Open House entertainment and all the stalls and I actually thought it was good and well done. I realise that I have changed my thoughts and feelings about some things and can see them in a more positive light.

Today I’m grateful for:

My old favourite student Cake, who is now in grade 9 and studying science to become a doctor in the future. She was a favoured student because she always had a positive attitude. She was already reading heavy science books when she was in grade 6.

Today she was managing a booth for her science program and I asked her to tell me all about it. At first, she was worried because she said her English was not as good as it used to be but after a brief consideration she said ‘Ok, let me try!’ and she did, very well.

The booth has the same things every year and I recognised it all from before but I let her do the spiel,  including about different teas and their properties after I asked which was good for a headache. She told me and gave me a free teabag to try, which I will sometime when I remember to bring it in from the car.

The best thing about today was:

Only having to be around for a couple of hours this morning and not teaching. Again the kids were all in a great mood and there was a good vibe among everyone. I was tempted to stay longer because I was having such a good time but Amy and I went off to buy a fridge and a fan and we now have a drinks fridge and bar area in the dining room.

Amy is happily making the house into the way she wants to make her feel comfortable. Things are good now but how will they be when the burning starts again and things start to annoy and upset her more. I’m still hopeful she can fill her time with things to take her mind off it.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Not a big surprise but I’d been waiting to be paid by TLC and sent a message to my boss who replied that she forgot to tell me that the school deducted my payment as I missed some days last month for my travel. I doubt that very much but like I said it’s not a big surprise really.

Something I learned today?

Today was Kru Jern’s 33rd birthday and after finding out I quickly ran to the cafe to buy a piece of cake for her.

Write about a song that always comforts and understands you.

Most of the songs stuck in my memory were not through comfort and understanding but through depression and perceived adversity. I distinctly remember playing the shit out of the Descendents ‘All’ album and The Dicks ‘These People’ album when trying to deal with the trauma of my first dumping. In a weird way they were my comfort.

There’s many songs that give me goosebumps and maybe Volcano Suns Room With A View understands me. ‘All I want is a second or two to collect my thoughts about you…I sit for hours on end, for hours on end…’

Kru Jern took this picture because Kru Ren and I are both playing dress up here. He is a video game character that I’ve never heard of and I am dressed up as a teacher.

Pie Time – 26th October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Savour the crumbs of the pie
Scraps picked from the floor
Be sure to breed and multiply
The cogs must turn some more
Money is power is oil is gold
Not for some to touch
And so the story has been told
From parent to child as such
Oil is power is money is gold
Only for some to touch
And so the lie has been sold
There’s already too much
So savour those crumbs of pie
Get back to the factory floor
Sons step in as fathers die
And so remains the score

Leaving this will be easier than living it.

Charles Bukowski

Today I’m feeling:
am: happy and relaxed – pm: tired and subdued
Today I’m grateful for:
My hair bleach to make me feel younger, at least when I look in the mirror. I’m still mixing up old congealed powder that I bought years ago and too thrifty to throw out. It’s not perfect but it still does the job.
The best thing about today was:
Crossing a few little bits and pieces off the to-do list. I have a few more that I have to remember for tomorrow too including picking up a cake for my birthday that Amy has arranged for me. Thank you my lovely little Amy.
What jobs do you do in life that you don’t get paid for?
Thinking in reverse, I do one job of teaching that I do get paid for and I don’t get paid for anything else so it comes down to what might be considered a job. I have a hobby promoting musicians and their music that does have minimal income but I don’t consider it as getting paid and loses more money than it gains. I don’t have any philanthropic jobs. I do work at things but none of them are jobs.

I took this picture because Kim Chi is enjoying sitting on the toilet mat and doesn’t move out of the way when I want to go. This is what I look down at!

Jungle Garden – 25th August 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Too many bananas, papayas and lychees
I got passionfruits stacked up to my knees
Chillies and pumpkin grown from spat-out seeds
On every speck of dirt, even amongst the weeds

Mulberries hang over the neighbour’s fences
I pick his mangoes to save on expenses
The land of plenty, these abundant times
We can’t even eat all the goddamn limes

26th Jun 2024 – Shared to Weekly Prompts Wednesday Challenge
29th Oct 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – pumpkin

…our age cries out for the redeemer personality, the one who can emancipate himself from the grip of the collective ‘psychosis’ and save at least his own soul.

Carl Jung, Development of Personality

Today I’m grateful for:
Making it through the day without too much stress despite feeling tired and dizzy.
The best thing about today was:
Was briefly talking and joking with Nong Cake. She is still a smart kid. She was preparing Thai and Japanese flags for Japan day tomorrow and I made a joke that the Thai flag was for Italy and she immediately understood and said that the Japanese flag was for Indonesia.

I took this picture because this is what my students drew on the board before class started. Baipad and Jan claimed responsibility and which was a little surprising though I know Baipad loves drawing. The picture made me laugh and then I teased them that I would show the head teacher and they begged me not to.
This is Trevor’s picture but of the same sunset that I was looking at last night. It was mesmerising.

Words Of No Inspiration – 16th August 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Not very inspired today
Not sure what to say
And I’ve got no choice
I have to do it anyway

Waiting to rejoin the flow
Got to get up and go
I have to get it done
It’s the truth, I know

Go for broke. Always try and do too much. Dispense with safety nets…Aim for the starrs. Keep grinning…Argue with the world.

Salman Rushdie

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Nut and Bruno for dropping my cake, bread and breadsticks to me yesterday. I have more food than I can eat at home now!

Fatman report

In The Alley – 25th December 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

There in the alley, the marginal spaces
The ministers mix with the drunk
Between the tavern and the church
Was the birth of soul and funk

Here lies the crux to save humanity
The bleed maintains the goal
Has heaven found its place on earth
Where angels delivered funk and soul?

Keep on pushin’, Minister Curtis
Not just shaking shaggy, do wow!
We got to find the rhythms of peace
And we got to find them now

adapted from a LitHub article about Curtis Mayfield

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for our palm trees, whose fronds Tangmo really loves to play with when they have fallen to the ground.

A pleasant morning, waking without an alarm and inspired enough to get back to the abs regime. I’ve just been doing two sets of 25 sit-ups a day, sticking my feet under the lounge as leverage. I’m hoping my muscles eventually become strong enough to pull my body up without having to use my legs.

Amy has been baking carrot cake as Christmas gifts and we first took one to Art at Utopia, which was enjoyed and they rewarded me with an awesome new coffee blend from Melbourne. Then, to Cafe With No Name to drop off their cake.

Back now for relaxing lunch and reading my first Samuel Beckett, which I now understand Sean Hughes’ fascination with. Looking at my book shelves, there are just so many great books I have that I can’t wait to read.

This evening we are off to Singha Park with Amy’s parents for a family Christmas dinner.

Slow It Down – 9th August 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Luckily I don’t need to be chasing bucks,
I can breathe through stressless days;
I’m not surrounded by some useless fucks
who always listens to what someone else says.

I’m not nostalgic for the weekend gone
and not living for the one that’s coming,
Today is the day to get things done,
I’d rather savour the walk than running.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my dreams – for my dream last night which I know was stimulating and interesting though right now it is out of reach again. I do remember meeting my favourite student, Cake, and she was happy to see me again.

The weekend made me so tired because I like to stay up late watching TV and then reading before going to sleep. Yesterday, Sunday, I went to bed at 7.30, read until 9 and couldn’t understand what I was reading, so went to sleep.

Sometimes I long for those days of finishing school on Friday, partying with friends, bumming around without direction, making our own mischief until Sunday evening came and the weekly bath indicated that that time was gone.

Amy has the possibility to go to the UK to work with Bookie, and it has got me wondering about returning to the UK. Also, Rupert is living in Holt now and is contemplative of how, no matter how much he travelled, he has ended up back close to where he started. Is that our destiny?

Sometimes I miss winter, but feel confident that going through another one would cure me of it!