You don’t love me
Cos I never clean my nails
You don’t love me
So don’t tell such tales
You don’t love me
Cos my hair is untidy
You don’t love me
Cos I’m always out on Friday
Old Man Pissed In Pub – 17th March 1988
Saw something funny yesterday
An old man from yesteryear
Singing some old army songs
In one hand, a fag, in the other, a beer
And he resigns himself to reminisce
Sat in a pub just getting pissed
And the tears in his eyes
Come from the youngster’s jibes
They just think he’s an old man pissed as a fart
One thing that rings true, they’re worlds apart
17th Mar 2023 – A kind of clumsy story that still makes me marvel (marvel may be too strong a word here) at my imagination as these words are totally drawn from there; maybe initially inspired just by a memory of an old man in a pub. In England, there was still a stereotype of old men sitting in pubs reminiscing about the war. There’s a strange comfort in this image for me. Being considered an old man myself now, I wonder if this stereotype still holds some truth. I have to imagine there are still old men sitting in pubs reminiscing about the miners’ strikes and Thatcher-era policies.
To Be Continued – 16th March 1988
Part one has just started
Your customer now out-smarted
Part one was great
But….to be continued at a later date?
Now you’re in a state
So you wait for part two
And what do you do?
Leave another cliffhanger
To generate more anger
And money
That’s funny
Get your special binder
Free for a fiver
Just a reminder
You Can Tell – 12th March 1988
You can tell yesterday was Sunday
Cos it’s Monday now today
You can tell that it’s no joke
But just the fun that I poke
You can tell that she is looking nice
But you won’t like her advice
You can tell that something is sin
It’s just something to do with feeling
12th Mar 2023 – Hardly genius but I never stopped writing and trying. Is ChatGPT genius? I asked it to make a better version and got this improvement:
Sunday’s past, and Monday’s here,
The week’s anew, let’s make it clear.
My playful jests, they may provoke,
But rest assured, it’s all in stroke.
She’s looking fine, a sight to see,
But heed her words with caution, be.
A feeling stirs, a hint of wrong,
But let it go, and sing a song.
Fat Sharon Off East Enders – 11th March 1988
Sat in front of a rectangular block
A light is flashing from my alarm clock
Angie’s on another one of her benders
Poor old fat Sharon off East Enders
It’s half-past seven again, so here goes
Have you seen Sue and Ali’s clothes?
Shit mate – the last of the big spenders
That fat cow Sharon off East Enders
20th Century Antique – 9th March 1988
When we grow old we’ll keep the things we call precious
And we’ll pass them down to our sons
And do you think anyone will be jealous
When they pass them down to their sons?
But the Antiques Roadshow will soon fail
There is no value to what we hold dear
Cos it’s just useless rubbish we didn’t really need
And our money had no meaning here
Worry – 8th March 1988
So you kicked me down and cut me up
Then turned around and said sorry
You shouldn’t be so concerned
I’m telling you, don’t worry
It’s not really me you’re thinking about
You just want to stop your guilt and doubt
Clean Sheets – 7th March 1988
I’ve got clean sheets
A clean body
And a dirty mind
Let’s go to bed
I want sleep
You disagree
And I find
Your love instead
I’ll change them tomorrow
Funny Old World – 6th March 1988
I said to my friend “It’s a funny old world”
He stopped crying and said “Yeah”
You know if we’re born without a smile
I wonder how we would fare?
Boys and Soldiers – 5th March 1988
The boy watched the soldier
Said “Dad, that’s what I want to be”
The soldier shot his dad
And hate was all the boy could see
The boy grew to be a man
And a soldier he became
And he knew his enemy
And killed without any shame
1994ever 