Tag: school

Steal away the morning light – 31st October 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

My main achievement today was to kick off the process of writing lessons again. I’m a little frustrated at knowing exactly what is required but just sitting down and thinking about it all again was good.

I revised my letter to Hayden and will need to tweak it a little more after sending it to his mum to see what she thought.

Tomorrow is back to the grind – I want to make it less of a grind this time. The reward for my effort previously was very motivating but once it got pulled out from under me by the pettiness of Kru Paew it was all the more painful.

I’ve been learning how to better deal with these kinds of situations but I also feel a little self-protective and will try to balance my time investment into what I’m teaching and what other things I want to do. I do tend to fully dive into things and focus a lot on becoming good at something but it often takes the focus away from other important things too.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to have this new opportunity teaching at a new school. I’m a little nervous but also excited.

Then the cowboy turned the gun on himself as he sang – 4th October 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Cats don’t judge. A cat is just a cat.

My last day of school. How do I feel? A little sad and disappointed to leave my students behind but hopeful and positive for the next school. I can visualise myself in class, prepared. Happy.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to the students who made me goodbye cards. I could feel how much I had affected them and what a good influence I had been. They really touched my heart.

The older you get the less you’re worth – 1st October 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Picture was taken a few months later when I went back for a visit.

Yesterday I told my class I was leaving. It was a little emotional – two of the students got teary. It was sad to see – those kids can’t go a whole semester with the same teacher. It did make me realise the impression I can make on students though. I hope I can work in the high school so I will still have the opportunity to see them sometimes. I know I can work in another school ok but I’m also dreading it a little.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Amy for helping me through all the tough situations since we met. Many things I can deal with and help her with but there have been times when she had been so wonderful and supportive. I know she gets frustrated with me sometimes too but at the end of the day, she is always there for me. I love her so much.

Weight: 83.1kg
Resting heart rate: 50

No windows, no ceiling or floor – 30th September 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Woke up just before my alarm. In my dream, I was trying to enter a password for something but kept getting it wrong. Things are fairly normal at home. Normal is good. Why I write this is because all our cats are happy at the moment.

All the humans are happy too.

My last week at school. Very relaxed. Not sure about what is coming up next – well, actually, I am. It’s holiday time. LIve in the moment. Your job doesn’t define you.

Gratitude Journal

Playing sport with some of the school kids made me smile, even when I fell over and hurt myself! I smiled and laughed with Amy a lot this week, feeling better about things in general. I smiled coming to school knowing that a holiday is coming and I will be leaving this environment. I smiled at Kim Chi and Cap chasing each other around the house. I smiled when the big dead lizard made Amy jump a mile into the air!

9th Mar 2021 – When I think about working at schools in Thailand I can’t help but believe that I am there for the student’s education and I care more about them than the ‘adults’ working there, who I can generally take or leave. The Thai staff at the schools I have worked at have a different agenda entirely as far as I can tell.

We got that attitude! – 26th September 2019

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Yesterday I showed some resilience. Small things upset me in the morning and everything felt overwhelming again. After school, I went to the dentist. I think sitting under the drill settled me down again. At home, Amy was quite negative about being here in Thailand but I was the one telling her things aren’t that bad. I realised I had some strength and resilience I need to draw on more.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that other people have shown an interest in working with me. It shows me that I am valued for my contributions.

Gratitude Journal

Today I’m looking forward to a job interview with another school. I’m looking forward to Hayden coming to visit in a couple of weeks’ time. My friend, Ellen, will also visit from China with lots of yummy Sichuan sauce. I’m looking forward to getting away from some people in this school where I work. I’m looking forward to time hanging around at home with Amy and our friends. I’m looking forward to the cooler weather of winter. Damn! I’m looking forward to a lot of things.

23rd Feb 2021 – Looking back on this looking forward is interesting. Some of the things I was looking forward to, didn’t necessarily turn out for the best but it was definitely the right way to approach all those things. I know some folks who anticipate the worst of the future and then feel pleasantly surprised when things turn out better than expected. I think I used to be like that but not these days. I’m much more of the thinking that even difficult tasks, events and situations are just occurrences and they will be over after a certain period of time regardless of what my thoughts are about them.

We got that attitude! – 25th September 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I dreamt I couldn’t find my socks so that I could go to school/work. Mum was there, although, I didn’t see her. She made me feel calm and I understood to work methodically to find them. I think my mum taught me patience – I surely tested hers.

Hayden will come to visit soon. I hope he can take away some life lessons from me. I should plan some things to talk with him.

Gratitude Journal

I learnt today that the sun still rises. No matter what. The old adage ‘it will pass’ is consistent, even if it doesn’t feel like it at times. I am grateful to the kids in my class. Day to day they don’t give a shit, yesterday’s problems are forgotten.

18th Feb 2021 – Sometimes I need an ego reset. Resume child-like wonder! This time was tough for me and I’m reminded now of one girl in another class getting really upset and angry at another student who made fun of her skin colour. I comforted her and told her she was a beautiful person and not to ever forget that. She looked up to me a lot after that. But now, I look up to her, as she and the bully run around playing together still.

Candle lights begin to glow – 24th September 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I dreamt about fire…and friends. We did our best to keep each other safe.

I still wake up during the night thinking about working with kids and how to get my mojo back and get rid of this dark cloud. It’s slowly lifting but I still need to do something to move it along. I want to learn to deal with this kind of feeling better.

Gratitude Journal

I smiled today when a P1 student came and gave me a hug.

15th Feb 2021 – Kids can be so perceptive sometimes. I obviously needed a hug.

Three things I am grateful for:

My friends who can show me support and the positive way. They make things feel better.
My wife who is a strong independent woman with a beautiful heart.
My cats who make me smile every day!