Tag: students

Sit Quietly – 30th March 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Hold still, slow down all thoughts
Soften eyes and ears
A mind racing around all sports
Bends on one’s fears

Sit quietly, letting contentment in
Soften ears and eyes
Craziness begone, deep breathing begin
Hear the word of the wise

Don’t be a coward. Have the courage to be afraid.

Günter Anders

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to have some smart students who make me laugh a lot and bring me great joy when they want to learn.

Shut Up And Shout – 25th January 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Letting others speak, even some nasty words
Tells you almost everything you need to know
Rather they, than you, put a foot in it
It’s a wonderful lesson for truth to grow

You can’t change what happened but what happens from here is up to you.

owner of Cerro Gordo

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to change up my first lesson today to start outside – give the kids and me something different to do.

After 3 busy, fun classes today, I can say that the kids are inspiring. In the morning, we did running dictation outside, which was a nice break from being in the classroom. Funny how some days the vibe is not quite right and other times everyone has a good time. So, it’s good to take it day by day and not stress when the bad ones happen.

After school yesterday, I went to Bruno’s and we went for our usual two circuit walk, to take me over 10,000 steps for the day. We talked about what happened with George last week and I feel OK with it and that it has told me more about him than he tried to imply about me. I also read about how some of us just prefer to be alone and are often criticised by those who are more social. I can accept George for the way he is – I can’t control it and it’s not my place to. It feels like he cannot do the same. So, whatever, as they say.

When I got home, I had a shower and a spoonful of kratom and felt awesome again, though I didn’t make it to my room to practice keyboard and guitar. Hopefully tonight.

What age-related adjustments have you recently made, style-wise, beauty-wise, health-wise?

The most obvious adjustment for me is health-wise, with cutting down on alcohol almost completely and doing more regular exercise. As a slow learner, I finally figured out to start small and build on the habit. Many of us are like that.

Beauty and style-wise, there’s not much of anything since bleaching my hair, giving up on trying to make my pepper hair black. I think I’ve been like this for 5 or more years already. It’s cool to have bleached hair in Thailand, as dark hair is pretty much the norm.

Maybe learning keyboard and guitar can be considered age-related adjustments; some things I now consider possible for me to learn, whereas I didn’t really have the opportunity before.

No List – 14th January 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I got a resolution for you
Do little, do less, do nothing
Unfocus, unwind, chase nought
See what results that will bring

Success is for the losers
Stuck forever within the grind
Missing out is my success
And gives me peace of mind

As you approach the same age as your parents when they had you, you gain great empathy for them, realising that like you, they were just kids trying to figure it all out along the way.

Cole Schafer

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be able to watch my students mature and improve their learning. I’m grateful to be part of that journey with them.

Got a little frustrated yesterday afternoon as I ran around getting a blood test and photos taken. The blood test has to be certified by a doctor and only one specific doctor. I wanted to take it there straight away but it doesn’t open until 6.30 pm, by which time I’m usually already at home and far away. I wasn’t going to hang around.

TLC insist that I have everything done by today but only told me about doing this on Tuesday. Never mind being busy with teaching and having to get a slew of documents copied. I don’t know why they can’t be organised enough to advise one month ahead of time. It’s typical Thai style and irritating. If I don’t do it in time, it means I will be penalised and have to pay more for the work permit.

Anyway, last night I just went home and put it to the back of my mind and primed myself to stay in the city for an extra 2 and a half hours waiting for the doctor to open at 6.30.

Last night, I spent time with Ableton and Launchkey and played a bunch of guitar. That was fun and I felt good, watching some TV and reading for a bit. Got to get back to reading Infinite Jest – it’s sitting there like a lead weight. Every time I pick it up to read, I love it but it’s not an easy read and it can feel like a chore.

This morning I was feeling good but my first class didn’t go well. The kids were tired and distracted and I felt like giving up but I stared out of the window and talked myself out of the feeling. It wasn’t too bad by the end and the next class went well, though everyone was a bit subdued there too. One more class…..

I saw the boys of this class playing football in the playground so I decided to join them and bond with them a little more and we had a good ten minutes before class started. It put me in a more active mood and the boys, who are usually a handful, were still playful but did their work, mostly. I leave this class easy work for Friday afternoon because I know they just want to finish and go home or talk with their friends. TFIF, though often these students think the week finishes on Monday morning.

So anyway, a happy end to the day. Now sitting around reading and finishing off a lesson I want to teach about sexual abuse in Thailand. I also want to put together a few new lessons to break up the ones I have now, which are all following a method (which seems to be working) but also feels a little mechanical.

What are some age-related milestones you are looking forward to? Or ones you ‘missed’ and might try to reach later, off schedule, according ot our culture and expectations.

The milestone I’m looking forward to is retirement. That doesn’t mean stopping working, but stopping working for money. It’s age-related but I don’t want to wait until I’m 65. I’d like to do it this year.

What other milestones are there? The decades? Age is just numbers and bodily deterioration! One thing I did hope to do at 50 was to have a big birthday concert with some of my favourite bands playing but as it turned out, I was working night shift in Adelaide and hadn’t been around the music scene for a few years already. It doesn’t matter – I’m not upset about it. At that time, I was working towards bigger things – moving to Thailand. That was what was important.

The big milestone of death I would like to put off as long as possible unless I go senile, though at that time I probably won’t really be thinking about it. I’d like to be fit and fifty-five, sixty with a six pack. I guess those milestones aren’t particularly in our culture though.

Projects – 7th January 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Put it together, pull it apart
A lesson is a work of art
Things to be responsible for
A world to discover more

Give them a wooden stick
Balanced on a broken brick
Trial and error, many a blunder
A world filled with natural wonder

Put in water, then dry it out
Let’s see what it’s all about
Neurons link, making able
A poem written at this table

People don’t take your power or make you invisible. You do that.

Andrea King Collier

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my positive attitude to helping the kids try new things, to grow and develop themselves.

Well, yesterday was excellent with the afternoon club going well despite Kartoon and Nampan’s reservations but I can feel that they are just lazy – it’s not that they aren’t capable.

I went home quite excited and upbeat though a little exhausted. I was expecting to have trouble falling asleep with thinking too much about what to do next with club and classes. However, after about 10 minutes I was out of it until my alarm went off at 6.20.

I joked with Amy that I had such a good day at school that it wouldn’t last and some nonsense would come along to knock me back down again but this morning was great too.

2/11 (grade 8) have been very good recently – I think starting to comprehend the class method, whilst perhaps not understanding all the English.

2/9 were reticent when they saw the work I wanted them to do today but they all settled down to it and I could clearly see them understanding and learning how to do my work. It made me feel very proud and I told them all how great they were doing.

One more class before the weekend – the dreaded 2/10, though even they have been showing signs of maturity lately, too.

It’s getting closer to Amy leaving now, though there is still a lot of doubt about whether it will actually happen, due to Covid. Could be a last minute decision.

How has getting older affected your sense of yourself, or your identity?

I have become more comfortable with who I am as I’ve gotten older but I think that has only happened more recently.

Moving to Thailand 4 years ago forced a re-evaluation of my identity, much as it did when I lost my job (my big, expendable income) in 2013. The trying times I have had since then have been things that have tried to force me outside my identity and there was clearly a period for me last year, when I made the call to chat with Jochen, that I knew that I was part of a particular tribe that doesn’t exist where I am, as such. I’m fine with that, in that I don’t need to be close to my tribe, I know that I am still a part of it and can always find my way back, if necessary.

I do not identify with many people around me, though I can recognise them. My instinct is non-adaptive to a degree. I am friendly, kind and understanding but I don’t want to hang out and talk about your mundane shit.

When I was younger, this may have bothered me a little. Sometimes I thought I should do more to fit in, or I would wonder why people don’t like me. I’m comfortable enough with myself not to care what other people think of me. Like it’s said – it’s not my business.

I quite admire the odd eccentrics of yesteryear who maybe sat around philosophising in drawing rooms, with brandies, into the early hours, whilst normal people went about their normal lives. I’m not a part of that but I do romanticise it somewhat.

As I age further, will my identity modify further or will I become a narrow-minded fuddy-duddy? No matter, it’s not for me to say but I try to keep my mind open for all new experiences that may be offered or sought.

Insight – 6th January 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Somewhere deep down
The solar plexus?
Requires time and space
Do nothing
See the clouds wander
But don’t look
The passing river
Thoughts in motion
You don’t have to do
But do nothing else
Dare to be bored
Remember that

Learn to accept your mediocrity.

Jerry Seinfeld

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to the happy friendly kids who all want to talk to me at school. They fill me full of joy.

Excellent fun with my class this morning. Most students seem to understand what I expect from them and we are all getting more comfortable with each other.

This afternoon Champ and I start our first class with the TED-Ed students. I think all the grade 11 students will be OK but I’m not sure about my grade 8 students. I hope that they feel inspired enough.

No time to think this morning but whenever I’m away from a pen and paper I have lots of thoughts I would hope to put down and many of them disappear, for a while or maybe forever.

The slight anxiety I had yesterday went in the afternoon as no one mentioned anything to me about not being around in the morning and I even got an apology for the short and indirect notice I received to teach. So, I worried about nothing – or people may be talking bad things about me that I don’t hear and I can’t control that and don’t need to worry about it either.

I’m noticing I’m starting to feel the wind down into the April holiday already, even though I’ve made myself busier than ever. I’d love to keep on teaching these students but also happy to leave it all behind.

Here Come The Good Times – 4th January 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Shuffling through the bodegas
Listening to all the chatter
Words of many are mundane
Though convinced they really matter

Seeking that perfect sandwich
Waiting in endless lines
Everyone is saying it now
Here come the good times

Lots of people suffer so much that perhaps they would have died of sorrow if they couldn’t dream something nice in between all the sadnesses.

Ceclia, Through a Glass Darkly by Jostein Gaarder
Analysis of the lyrics to A Good Day by Smart Went Crazy

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that all the kids are back at school today. Hopefully until the end of the semester.

Two full-on classes as a welcome back this morning. As I was teaching in the second, I looked at the students, they were not really concentrating and full of beans but I only wanted them to do some writing, so once they had finished, it was difficult for them to maintain any concentration. Rather than try to push them to remain quiet, I walked with a few of them one-to-one instead and found that they could understand the work well enough.

Now I’m in the cafe and reading about the idea of longsight. I have to remember this when in class. Think about longsight for those kids and the bigger picture. I can only push them so far before they explode.

Dylan tested positive with an ATK yesterday and is at hospital getting a PCR test this morning. Covid creeps ever closer.

What is surprising about being your age, or different from what you expected, based on what you were told?

I don’t think anyone ever told me what to expect. I grew up in my teenage years around my mother and her parents and to my young self I could never imagine being their age and likewise I could never imagine them being my age.

I had gone to Australia and was away from my mother as she went from middle to old age, so I was only ever exposed to that on infrequent visits.

I am perhaps surprised at myself for not feeling old, not feeling what old people looked like. My mother had told me she felt like this too – even as she was in old age. She cursed her fading body but was proud to have kept her marbles.

So it’s surprising to me that I seem to be finding time to improve my fitness, perhaps a little too late but it makes me feel better anyway. I thought that I would keep on drinking my nights away but now don’t find the pleasure anymore. This may be typical for many older people but for me it was unexpected. I’m grateful I’m not so bloody-minded to keep pushing my liver to extremes like I was 18 or 30 again.

Mica Friction – 30th December 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

A bowling ball
Heading toward the pins
A 7-10 split
Let’s see who wins
Internal asymmetrical block
Influencing spins
Dry board mica friction
Analysed, winner grins

We got some blowback afterwards, but so what? We won.

Brad Blakeman, Republican operative

28 Sep 2022 – Most quotes I find are affirmations of a sort, but this one is a reminder of how corrupt people can be, doing anything to win.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the cat massage Kim gave me this morning when I went to see her in her room. Then we rubbed noses and cuddled until she got distracted and ran off.

A busy time coming up and my head is full of things. Good things though. Not feeling stressed about anything except for maybe overloading myself with too much. Nothing serious though – I just have so much I want to do in a day and it doesn’t really matter if I don’t get to do them.

I went to Central to look for a diary but couldn’t find anything suitable, so opeted to get another notebooks that I didn’t really need but felt compelled to buy after having made the effort to go there.

The omicron covid variant is dirsupting Amy’s thoughts about travelling and may change her plans. I think if she doesn’t go in January then she won’t be able to go until after my next visa is completed. I think she’ll make a decision in the next couple of weeks, carefully watching the numbers and decisions Australia makes about travel.

I’m about to rush back to school for a quick meeting with some selected grade 8 students to do some extra work on producing TED-Ed presentations in the future. Let’s see how it goes. I will go sit in the school cafe later and write some more. Right now – let’s see if I can spit outa poem for today!

Back again. Met with the students. It is painfully obvious the difference between those in M2/9 and those in M2/10 and M2/11. Those in M2/9 have confidence and feel that they can do things. The others – not so much but I really hope they don’t quit out of fear of failure. It’s a great opportunity for them to learn and grow, work with new students and make new friends.

I know sometimes, when I was that age, I would just give up. I know how they must feel. I also know that I would have benefited by changing my mindset and giving it a go. I’ll try my best to keep encouraging them.

I had hoped that Champ would be here to help reassure them and kicking myself a little by not explaining things clearly enough. Hindsight. That’s why I sent out a message of encouragement with a Thai translation. I hope I can keep up the momentum I’m feeling and don’t get dragged down by the setbacks.

What is difficult about being your age?

I’m half-jokingly thinking to myself that it sucks that I have the confidence (and lack of caring about the outcome) to talk to anyone now. Especially to pretty girls. Why I couldn’t do it when I was younger is annoying to think about! But it’s not really a difficulty of my current age.

The only thing that really sticks out is the obvious one of aching body parts. Constant sore neck, tender shoulder blades, sore wrists, and painful left foot. As I never really exercised much when I was younger, my muscles have all learned bad habits that may be difficult to reverse now. As with my initial thoughts, perhaps all I’m really feeling is regret – something that I consciously try to avoid or not consider.

At whatever age we are, we probably all want to be 5 years old again, without many a care in the world. So perhaps that is what is difficult – the inability to be a 5-year-old. Seeing things with a greater sense of wonder. It seems to require a greater effort to achieve that as you age.

I am a serious person these days. I’m happy like that. I can’t not care about things, so sometimes that is a little difficult to accept.

To-Do List Of Yesterday – 28th December 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

You’re never going to get to the end
But the end will find its way to you
No matter how hard you try to cross the list
Find satisfaction in whatever you do

I wish I’d thought more about how it is to live.

Cecelia, Through A Glass Darkly by Jostein Gaarder

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Dylan for giving Amy and me some homemade Baileys for Christmas. It reminded me to give him the shirts that no longer fit me in return.

Yesterday, Champ told me that students will be in school full-time again next week. This made me revise my plans for my classes and last night I posted a short video asking my students to ask me anything and in this morning’s class, I got the students to make and send a video question, which was a welcome break for them and they enjoyed messing around with video filters.

It also, unsurprisingly to me, highlighted a lot of the students’ deficiencies when it comes to thinking and speaking! But that’s ok, I think I will incorporate more work like this to be included on the school’s English Program page.

I’m also looking forward to having the students back here full-time again, as switching between at-school and at-home study week by week is challenging for me and even more so for the kids. I don’t know how long they will keep kids in school, though. If another wave of Covid comes, which it surely will, everything may change again.

I don’t want to wish time away but I am looking forward to a proper holiday, proper as in not working – no plans to go anywhere, without thinking about school.

This afternoon, I will drop by Bruno’s and go for a quick hike somewhere close by. Need to work off some of the pizza and beer weight I put on this week. Doing 30 sit-ups twice a day now. Need to be careful with my back, though; my abs are still not strong enough.

The Week That Was – 18th March 1979

A Good Witch – 16th December 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

What power does a good witch wield
And how can it be so?
The power to limit jackassery
Using that golden word – No!

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the coffee shop next to school where I can go and work quietly when I don’t have the car to go off elsewhere.

Quick one today. I gotta pee and I gotta go buy some bits and pieces.

Reasonable classes today and I enjoyed the students a lot. A little bit of effort from them will bring them a reward. A happy teacher will make a happy student.

I started the final 30-day abs workout. Already, it’s hard! But I’m gonna do it.

This pen is running out. That’s two pens in two days. Something else to buy.

Stan’s Law – 25th November 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

*It’s hard to accept
A door without a handle*
To hold in your fist
An eternal burning candle

When doing wrong
Turns out to be doing right
To purposefully ignore
What is clearly within sight

The door is shut
And your skin is burning
Oxymoronic times
Opens eyes to learning

*quote from Stanislaw Lem

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for T. Champ to be understanding about the way I teach. He’s good to be around.

I’m pretty happy this morning to receive lots of messages from my students asking questions or submitting their work. This makes me feel better about my teaching and confirms a little to me that those parents complaining don’t understand what I’m trying to achieve with their kids. It will take a long time to change things in this country.

Is my way better? It doesn’t matter. I am the way I am and I teach what I believe. I just want the students to try and not just think that everything is going to work out whether they put in effort or not.

Sometimes I know I’m intense but it’s my character. I can change it somewhat though I find it hard. I’m also not all crazy strict with the kids and I think they like me. It’s usually the parents who are the problem! I know they have their ways that they want things done. I guess I’m not the person to do that for them! Haha!

Anyway, the good students are doing really well. They make me proud.

I’m starting to miss Amy a little already, even though it’s two more months before she leaves! I’m starting to think about all the extra things that I will have to do for myself and the cats and the house. But this time I want to have music playing all day, every day! That should make things bearable.

I’m thinking about whether to post on the MFU Facebook page for students to come and hang out on weekends and to practice their English – but I’m not sure about this as I value my free time so much!

Hopefully, we get a good holiday in April next year. Perfect! I can practice retirement.