Tag: writing

My Good News – 23rd November 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

The word is a reckoning
So roll up your sleeves
Bring order to the turmoil
Your monologue believes

Codify your weary soul
Give fire to your blues
Step up towards your God
Confront him with your news

Inspired and paraphrased (as ever) from the Red Hand Files #297
10th Sep 2025 – Shared with Poets and Storytellers United – something good

Today I’m feeling:

Happy though a little out of it (I realised as I got off the bike at Utopia). Brain has not kicked in yet!

My body is a little stiff from a good still sleep and a couple of weird dreams, one of which had me kicking rugby balls through jumper goalposts until they landed in a lake and curiously sank.

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

The person sharing all the Rebirth comics on Soulseek that I may possibly get around to reading in about 20 years time. It’s been fun getting them and then filling in the gaps and making new files. Part of my cataloguing obsession is satisfied (even if they are only digital files these days).

The best thing about today was:

Sitting in the hammock reading David Foster Wallace’s review of the Tracey Austin autobiography. He knows how to eviscerate wordily!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

After telling Amy that I didn’t want to succumb to sleep this afternoon, the pull was too strong and despite the strong morning coffees giving me lucid dreaming for longer than normal, I managed to find a deeper sleep for a good while, spending about three hours in bed.

Still, I was up and into the man cave, feeling a little refreshed and I played guitar for an hour or more, which was good. I’m glad I didn’t sleep through until it was dark again and hope I can get to sleep tonight. I think I should be all right.

I’m still wondering about the reduction in Sertraline and how it is affecting my mood. I still don’t feel quite right.

Something I learned today?

Tracey Austin’s tennis career was pretty much over by the time she was 21, her body already suffering from the punishment of overtraining.

I took this picture yesterday because we had a random visitor wander in and lie down at the front of class. These are all the naughty kids in my class, taking the opportunity to avoid doing my work.

The Silo – 5th November 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

There were many that day
Was it day? Is it night now?
Here, it’s not possible to tell
Time has lost all its meaning

We lined up waiting for the interview
It has been a long wait
But I will review all that came to pass
It was obvious, even as I said it
It took me a long time to figure it out
The master told me that messages were sent
But I had been slow to realise

Later, we all gathered round
And I wasn’t the only one
Most of us facing the review agreed
That we all took too long to realise
Then we returned to the silo
Perhaps one day, we can try again

A time-disoriented play on a life’s review in The Matrix or Heaven.

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good again, though sadly, I was a little achy again this morning. Never mind, I’m still feeling relaxed and positive. Only a couple of classes today, one tomorrow and then that’s the week done for teaching! What a crazy school!

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru David for inviting me to get involved in a little project idea he has to sell a maths board game. It could be a money maker but for me, I feel that I can’t invest my time in this, especially as it requires effort in marketing it, which I absolutely detest.

The best thing about today was:

Being able to get back to writing poetry with a 3-hour break between classes today and working hard on two pieces. It’s now, when I realise that a lot of my time and effort is going into that writing, as I’m not just churning out the ideas anymore but trying to improve my work.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The sports boys in my grade 12 class were late to arrive this morning and what I was teaching was far above their capabilities, so I let them be, whilst trying to interact with them whenever I could.

I’m not going to be able to gift those boys with much knowledge beyond convincing them that they should at least give everything a shot.

Something I learned today?

Baby owls often sleep face down because their heads are too heavy.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I good humouredly let Earn know not to talk to me in a rude way, even if it was just for fun. We were both laughing about it, but she understood what I wanted to convey.

One of my students sent me this today, along with some funny, cheeky comments.

You Are The Key – 17th October 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments

Cultivate your garden
On the revelations of loss
A flower to push on through
The weeds you’ll come across

Are you terrified of the rain
Or love rolling around in mud?
Either way, stand up again
To see roses made from blood

There always was a before
And there will be an after
For every tear spilt
Endless hours of laughter

You can hold onto your pain
Keep it safely in a box
Remind yourself now and again
Of this healthy paradox

Inspired and paraphrased from this post at Spinning Visions

Today I’m feeling:

A little blurry in the head, though fairly happy too. Waiting for the coffee to kick in!

Trying to write a poem and started off with two killer lines and then coming up blank on anything else! Trying to think but I’m lost in the fog at the moment!

Finally, the coffee started working and I went for a third cup and I should be able to fight off the urge to nap this afternoon!

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Not napping! I was tempted but forced myself out to my room to get up to my usual bullshit there. Listen to music, download comics, add blog entries and play guitar.

The best thing about today was:

Playing guitar along to Archers of Loaf, the Wipers and SquirrelBait, whilst a little under the influence of a weed brownie, had me now imagining that I was actually quite good on guitar. I’m not but it sounded good at that moment!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I braved the rain on the motorbike this morning to go to Utopia, as Amy didn’t want me to use the car yet. Thankfully, it was the end of the storm and just a little drizzle and by the time I came back again, the sun was out.

I also stopped and chatted with Aum Aim while she was working at her mum’s stall. She proudly told me her grade when I asked her – 3.85.

I’ve been thinking about my grading a lot this week, since fielding questions from students last weekend. I think I will be less serious about grading for the high school kids from this semester. The grades they get can seriously affect their options when it comes to university choice in the future.

It seems a bit petty to give an average grade to an average student who isn’t in the English program and whom I only see once a week. If they show willingness, I just give them a good grade, regardless of their skill level.

Am I submitting to the foibles of the Thai system?

Something I learned today?

Anchan told me that despite her being sick, she was in Burma to visit her mum in prison, perhaps the only chance she will get. She said it was dirty and crowded there.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Anchan also told me that she can get back to Chiang Mai from Burma and she will be a little better looked after, food-wise, until she has to come back to school next week. She asked me for money again but I had to deny her this time. I’m happy to help her a little bit but I don’t want her to think that I’m just an ATM.

I took this picture because I received the Minnesota Pocket Circuit CDs from Team today.

Gathering Magic – 13th October 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Connections form between young and old
As the tribe gathers at these tables
Every nugget may not be gold
And truths told as if they are fables

The dining room, like a rush-hour train
A gaggle of gossip between gulps of water
The old folks never tire to explain
Love for their new grandson and daughter

Two hands touch to make a familiar bond
Share secrets down the generations
Soft in comfort where love belongs
And meets all expectations

Shared with WDYS #257 picture prompt and also submitted for an assignment at AllPoetry.com as follows:
Write a 12 to 24-line poem in any style that uses simile. Keep the imagery consistent and clear. Make sure that you use two clear examples of simile in your poem using the words ‘as’ or ‘like’ as discussed in the lesson. Try to write in the present tense and incorporate at least one concrete use of the senses in addition to imagery and metaphor, which was covered in the previous assignment.

Today I’m feeling:

Reasonable and positive, fairly relaxed.

I woke up late, allowing myself to get up when I felt ready. I had no real appointments or plans, so it was no big deal.

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

The hairdresser today, who paid particular attention to trimming the hair out of my ears.

I think that as she knows that as I always tip her and my cut is quick and easy for her, perhaps she felt that she owed me a little extra. I usually enjoy pulling the hair out of my ears whilst I’m waiting at traffic lights. I’ll have to wait a few weeks for them to grow back again.

The best thing about today was:

Well, it might not be right to say it was the best thing but the main thing that happened today was going to another funeral.

This one was for a friend of a friend who, whilst riding his pushbike, got hit into a ditch by a drunk driver who sped off, but was later tracked down.

If he hadn’t sped off and stayed to help, there was a chance that it might have saved this guy’s life.

Today was his cremation and I drove us there and followed the proceedings, which is something I’ve grown used to here. There were lots of fireworks today, more than I’ve seen before.

There were also lots of people; the guy was a well-liked coffee shop owner and his wife works at the university. He was only 32.

Despite the heat, the three hours there went quickly and I was inspired to write a few related rhymes while there.

Something I learned today?

Stumbling on a video about Junji Ito alerted me to the fact that he has a lot more work out there than I realised. It was an interesting psychological analysis of his work which gave me a better appreciation of his style of horror.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

At the funeral, Amy asked me to fan her to cool her down, to cool us both down. She said that the other aunties there would be jealous because her man was fanning her, something that most Thai men wouldn’t think about doing.

Indeed, one old uncle was curious and came over to try to chat a little but he didn’t stay for long.

I took this picture to remember another funeral. Today it made me think about growing accustomed to and accepting of another culture despite not understanding it.

Perfecting The Eight – 6th October 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Here’s the one perfecting the eight-liner
Though some things must be said in twelve
Only enjoying writing the rhymer
And philosophy is the place to delve

Sometimes perfection is found in four
The idea sublimely surmised
Yet feeling obliged to write some more
Until the eight lines are realised

Submitted as a task for AllPoetry’s ‘An Expression of Yourself’ course.

Don’t be Ordinary

This assignment is going to take you beyond your reaches. I want something that you can’t even fathom writing. Go beyond what you think is normal.

Write to be remembered. Don’t write like anyone else… Don’t blend in! It’s okay to be original and shocking. To stir the pot and to poke the balloon and deflate it. Shake things up. Make a name for yourself.

Write a poem that you would want to define your ability. A poem that is read and the person is like… that is “your name here”.

Don’t write a poem where it could be stirred into water and blended in with everyone else.

This was an interesting task. I can look at a couple of other poets who follow their own rules and can be identified by their poetry.

As I’ve been writing for 40 years or so I don’t feel that I have a particularly identifiable style, though now I’m thinking more about it.

I do have a preference of style for my own writing though so I submit the following for now.

I could break my preference (and do sometimes force myself with different forms) but not sure that I could ever reach writing something that I can’t myself fathom…..

Today I’m feeling:

A little sleep-in this morning was good, setting me up for the day.

After a simple yet delicious lunch, I dropped Amy off at the airport as she goes off to Bangkok for a couple of days to meet Fern and Pim.

I decided to take Baipad to practice driving a car, rather than a motorbike, as it’s too hot in the afternoon and she called Fahmai to come too.

We drove around near her house and then up at the Uni and they both did well for never having done it before.

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 8

Today I’m grateful for:

Finding old reviews of 2000AD issues that I’m reading now, which help me to understand some of the weirder stories. Excellent!

The best thing about today was:

Teaching the kids a little driving, because I could see the confidence in them both growing as they were learning.

Something I learned today?

The CIA posted on Twitter and Facebook, asking for Chinese citizens to become their spies. This was met with a lot of laughter on Chinese social media platforms.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I messaged Baipad to ask how she felt after she did so well with driving and she replied, ‘I feel proud, I think.’ It’s a good start.

Baipad’s cat, Inky. He’s a very chatty cat when he’s awake.

Cave And Ferry – 19th September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 21 Comments

Wet with privilege, a subtle sorrow
No more songs will come
A tuneful whistle on a country drive
All that’s left of the genius one

There is always something
And always nothing too
With little air in between
The difference is the work to do

A satisfied melancholy
A poetic drama ends
Left to wander the grounds
Bumping into friends

Inspired and pilfered from The Red Hand Files #286
12th Dec 2025 – Shared with Poets and Storytellers United #207 – in between

oday I’m feeling:

Really dizzy and out of sorts. I went straight to the hospital but still hadn’t seen a doctor by midday. When I asked, they said that I had to wait for a ‘special’ doctor who only arrives at 1 pm!

My head is also not in a good place right now, either. Wild thoughts of quitting and moving or just sleeping.

Health:

Physical: 5
Mental: 5

Today I’m grateful for:

All the staff who helped me at the hospital. Despite it being frustrating, I don’t think it was anyone’s fault in particular.

The best thing about today was:

Not much I must admit. I did start to feel a little more positive by the evening, so that is something at least.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I don’t know why things took so long at the hospital today. I got there at nine and finally left at 2.45 pm. I saw a doctor for less than two minutes and was told to come back to see an ENT specialist on Saturday.

Something I learned today?

I should follow up with the staff at the hospital a little quicker. It may only be a coincidence but things only started happening once I asked what was going on.

Pack Yr Bags – 12th September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 9 Comments

“On yr bike!” she said

But I was already prepared
Bags packed and stacked

Taking all my lovers with me
Contained on the pages
Where there is every poem I’ve ever written

Submitted to WDYS #253 (attached picture prompt) and the form and idea were inspired after reading this poem at The Skeptic’s Kaddish.

Today I’m feeling:

A little tired still, as I woke up in the night, as Amy was restless and worried about the flooding. Thankfully, all seems ok at her parents’ so far but water levels are still increasing in certain areas.

Her stupid brother booked himself a flight from Bangkok and despite everyone telling him to stay there, he insists on coming. This morning, the airport road is flooded and the flight is delayed and he’s thinking to fly to Chiang Mai! Why!?

Amy asked him why he wants to come when he couldn’t even get to the family home and he just replied that he misses home. Something is not right in his brain!

This is the underpass at the airport. Thankfully, the water isn’t too high on the road but still, the airport soon closed this morning.

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

The one pharmacy today that had the Tiger Balm that Amy wanted. The four I tried yesterday all had a different type.

It seems she has gotten herself a bruised rib from slipping over at the weekend when we were cleaning the house. One of those injuries that hurts more after a few days.

She’s taking a bit easy and I am her little slave boy when required.

The best thing about today was:

Getting some flow whilst sitting at Utopia and putting together a couple of lessons. Once I get into that state, I just want to keep going but it was already lunchtime.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I sent a message to all my students asking if they are all doing ok. Most are but some are telling me that they are about to be flooded. It’s weird because at my house it has already stopped raining and the sun is out!

I found this picture on Instagram. This is the road and entrance to my school.

The Silence – 31st May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 30 Comments

The sadness is creeping
– Into my periphery
Until it overwhelms

Salty tears a-weeping
– All about is sucking me
Deep into darker realms

My old friend
– A bitter taste of blood
A dull aching head

Let’s not pretend
– That this is good
But sleep instead

Submitted to dVerse Quadrille #202 – Darkness and Poets and Storytellers United #129
24th Mar 2026 – shared with dVerse Quadrille – silence

Today I’m feeling:

Tired but kept running by knowing that it’s the end of the week.  Six hours of hot and humid teaching even with brief respites in the aircon have been completely draining.  

I’m home now and will make myself a salad soon.  

I took three of the magic mushroom pills that I got from Matt and can feel a sense of pleasure rising in me and will watch some comedy to wind down the evening.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Den, (I’m not sure if that’s her name actually) who lent me her Bluetooth speaker for my second class.  I gave her a frangipani flower in return.  I’d gotten it from a student earlier, who had put it behind my ear.

The best thing about today was:

Getting some good feedback on some of my recent poems.  I didn’t get a chance to write anything new today but whereas I used to be about a week behind in posting poetry I’m now a month ahead.  I’m enjoying writing and learning different forms and playing with it a little more.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I snuck up on Nong Fah and stuck a wet finger in her ear as she was lying down looking at her phone in a classroom. She went off in a huff and Jet said that she had PMS and had been moody all day (although she was fine in the morning when I saw her).

Knowing that it is best not to do anything more I played a bit with some other students but saw Fah dabbing her eyes with a tissue and looking really upset.  I watched her from a distance and wondered at the loss of emotional control that many females get once a month.  I can never really understand what that must feel like.

I caught her eye before I left for my own class and tried to express my sympathy with her.

Almost instantly on arriving at my own class, I could see that KanomBang was grumpy with me and her friends tried to explain that she too had PMS.  “That thing…..girls….once a month…”  I love it when the kids realise that they successfully communicated something in their second language.

Anyway, KB soon picked herself up a little bit and was ok.

It’s so weird to see the bewilderment on these kids’ faces when they go through this.  Like ‘Why the fuck am I feeling like this and can’t change it?’

After I got home I messaged a mini heart to Fah and said that I was sorry she was upset in the classroom.  She too, had recovered herself a little by then and was happy to chat a little.  I told her I was sorry I snuck a wet finger in her ear and she laughed and said she was sorry that she behaved the way she did, which I, of course, told her there was no need to apologise.

As an aside, interestingly my super smart grade 8 student Film questioned me in class why I treated boys and girls differently, something that he had picked up on perhaps when the ‘couple’ in the class were ‘fighting’ with each other.  I say ‘fighting’ because it is really just puppy love quarrel-play – nothing serious.

The kids listening were very interested when I replied that I treat girls differently because of the way I can see they are treated in Thai society and that boys are seen as superior and are spoiled more.  This got them talking a lot and whilst the girls agreed in general they said that their own families treated them like princesses.

It was an interesting idea to leave them with, to think and talk about.

Something I learned today?

I learned that Monday is a day off and on Wednesday students won’t come to school.  

Apparently, there will be a sports event at the stadium for about 10 days which is going to make traffic even worse in the mornings.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I gave Nicha a little pep talk when she was looking down this morning.

After I’d finished teaching I saw my old grade 9 students with Kru David and I checked in with a few of them who were struggling with his work.  Earn was all happy with herself because she told me that she had finished and, being a little suspicious, I asked if she had copied someone she shushed me and immediately admitted that she had.

I asked her what program she might do next year and she said the Chef program. I said that’s great and encouraged her to at least get what she could out of being in the English program this year.

As I was leaving I saw Aida sitting by herself and also looking down.  I actually didn’t recognise her at first as her head was tilted downwards with her hair covering her face.  Her friends said that she was upset and tired today and when I met her at lunchtime she was resting her head on the table but with a quick chat she said that she would be ok to do my work in the afternoon.

I was intent on leaving quickly but seeing her again I stopped and sat with her and also gave her a little pep talk. She didn’t say much until I asked her if everything was ok at home and she opened up that she was having some problems with her mum.  We didn’t get into it but I told her that she can talk to me at any time if she needs to.

Dancing In The Street – 25th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments

I used to enjoy the dance of days
Seized each second in many ways
Yet the sunshine never stays
– And here I am contemplating

I’d foxtrot my way through the rains
Tango a message that explains
Until only a rumba remains
– To leave the fat lady waiting

Waited she did until too late
I could not escape this certain fate
And ever since that fatal date
– I walk the streets alone

Thinking of a flamenco strut
Dressed and shaved, hair clean cut
Nowadays I’m anything but
– Can’t even dance on home

Submitted to No Theme Thursday and Ovi Poetry Challenge 49

Today I’m feeling:

My usual Saturday morning tired already.  It’s only been a three-day workweek for me too.

Last night I felt kinda invincible. Throw anything at me and I can do it.

Come the morning and I can feel my brain struggling to connect things together. As I was reading about John Lee Hooker and BB King I was thinking about something else entirely and I can barely remember either.

Quick coffees today as we will take Nong Na out for lunch to thank her for taking care of our cats last weekend.

Today I’m grateful for:

Taking the time to go to the city for lunch, picking up Na on the way.  We got to the hotpot restaurant at 12 and I couldn’t believe that it was 2 pm when we had finished.  Time went so quick and I was very relaxed.

The best thing about today was:

The mix of the hotpot soup that soaked into the rolled-up tofu sheets, then dipped into a peanut and sesame oil sauce with chopped garlic and then a sip of some Chinese milk drink to take off the heat.  Awesome!

The staff were concerned that the soup would be too spicy for me but to be honest I could’ve done with some more Sichuan peppers in there!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

As seems to be getting more normal these days, time is out of my control and disappearing faster than I would like.  I sat in my room after lunch and started investigating a cento poem, which required looking through lots of other people’s poetry to pick out lines from.

Doing that and catching up on some other poetry reading evaporated 3 or 4 hours and I didn’t end up coming up with anything for the cento yet.  I still need to collect more before trying to put it together.

Something I learned today?

The USA has threatened the capability to shut down chip manufacturing in Taiwan if China should invade.  The short-sightedness of the threat is incredible as it would mostly affect USA products such as Apple, nVidia etc.

There’s a lot of crazy in the world right now, perhaps I should stop looking.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

We drove to pick up Nong Na this morning as there was a bit of rain around and I drove us to the city and back.  Whilst Amy paid for lunch I paid for the durian bingsu dessert.

I also picked up a couple of 20 baht Japanese toys for Baipad and NamHom whilst at the bingsu shop.

Nong Fah took these pictures because Anchan was sleeping in class like this! I asked her later about it and she told me that Kru Ren doesn’t know anything about teaching and is difficult to understand! The kids are smart enough to know their education sucks but don’t know how to get out of it and the culture here is not to question those seen as above you.

Subterranean – 5th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 15 Comments

Like Jack, I ran quickly from my dreams
Eager to discover what it all means
In the moment, exploring the themes
Is anything at all what it seems?
– Put it down on paper
– To review this endless caper

I found a box and put time inside

Was it living or was it writing?
It’s only myself that I’m fighting
A jazz dance in the underlighting
Each pair of eyes met, newly smitten
Fresh fruit waiting to be bitten
Another story begging to be written
– Late nights spent on the town
– Running home to get it down

I found a box and put time inside

And when I meet my future me
I’ll open the box to look and see
Words pressed, sentimental free
Whether tragedy or victory
– Presented here from me to you
– A diary of everything I do

I found a box and put time inside

Submitted to No Theme Thursday and dVerse Meeting The Bar (bop poem)
Inspired by the movie The Subterreans, based on the Jack Kerouac novel of the same name, where one of Jack’s girlfriends criticises him for always running off to go and write about the events of the night whilst he could have stayed and enjoyed more adventures. For some reason, this interaction always stuck with me.
Either way, WordPress provides a box of time for our future selves.

Today I’m feeling:

Anxious this morning. I woke up well before my alarm thinking about going to Bangkok and preparing for school next week.

Starting to relax a bit as I wait for the plane as I leave control to others for an hour or so until landing again.

Today I’m grateful for:

The crazy mixed-up rail options in Bangkok for helping learn more about getting around and gauging travel times. It’s also helped me achieve 10,000 steps easily.

The best thing about today was:

Meeting old friends and new ones at the show tonight.  First Nampan and Pam from SpeechOdd. 

Then Team, who is a young uni student that contacted me last week trying to make connections to put together a screamo band. Later, another young guy called Poom bought some screamo from me so I introduced them to each other.

Of course, I met Arwith and his bandmates in Piri Ries.

I met Sano-san from Low Fat again and exchanged CDs. 

I briefly talked with Fern who is the owner of the venue.

Nampan introduced me to the High Voltage folks.

I also met one of the guys from ADxHD (Korea) who also plays in Struggle Session (China).

Another guy came up to me and asked if I was Shaun and if I remembered him? It was Sasha from Russia! I met him about nine years ago in Kuala Lumpur when we were both staying with Kimi!

It is a little sad to think how small our world is because it feels like there are so few of us interested in this music. But it is amazing to bump into random connections anywhere in the world.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Just my sweat. Thankfully I bought an extra pair of clothes as I was expecting this.

Something I learned today?

Coming from Don Muang, don’t get off the train at Chatuchak for Chatuchak market! Even the nearest station at Bang Sue is a fair walk.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I left some stock free of charge at Heaven and Hell. Poowanat gifted me a CD in return.

I sold some merch at a discounted price at the show and also gifted the venue the Trumans Water and Flesh Narc CDs.

I took this picture because I finally got to see SpeechOdd play.