Wind Up – 16th November 2022

It’s a crowded room full of screaming
And I’m feeling out of control
I wish I was only bad-dreaming
As I’m sinking into this hole

I gotta leave here quick
Or something’s gonna blow
Not sure what’ll do the trick
I don’t know, I don’t know

Temperature rising to the max
Smoke coming out my ears
Gotta face up to the facts
Or it’s gonna end in tears

Ran myself out the door
Before I got to blow
I can’t do this anymore
I know, I know

How you confront difficulties with determine your fate.

Robert Greene, Daily Laws

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and satisfied
Today I’m grateful for:
Working for most of the day. Some days I’m happy to only have two classes (4 hours) and can relax and then sometimes on days like this with three classes (6 hours) I can feel happy and achieving something too. It helped that I’d planned well and that the students were in pretty good moods.
The best thing about today was:
Taking time to be one on one with some of the poorer or quieter students in my last class and seeing them start to understand more about what I’m asking them to do. It’s a little frustrating that some students get left behind in the melee of the full class especially when they can do the work if they take the time to understand. The pull of the crowd is strong though.
Daily thought
Do you have any hopes or fears?
I do but I don’t put much stock in them. For instance, I hope Amy can come back here and find some happiness and something to occupy her time effectively and I have some fear of packing up and moving back to Australia (fear of the logistics and effort) but at the same time I know that whatever happens everything will be ok. So I would downgrade fear and hope to preferences.
What do you think of the idea of living forever?
Just about everyone ponders this idea at one time or another. I first did after watching the first Highlander film or reading The Sandman and was quite into the idea. I once thought aloud that I would live to 300 which seems a little more reasonable. But to live forever means to live beyond the existence of the universe and forever would not just be a long time but would make our universe’s existence like just a pinprick in time. That does not seem amusing. Perhaps the joy of our lives is knowing that they will not last and why I enjoy the excitement and wonder of my students with whom I can still share in their dreams. I hope they can all find some satisfaction in their own lives.

Praewa took this picture because we were having fun in the classroom today and I was pretending to be angry. It’s funny to see this because I guess this is what I must look like sometimes when I am actually angry. Even my ‘bad’, ‘difficult’, and ‘annoying’ students were ok today.

Let me know your thoughts

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