Definition – 23rd March 2023

I don’t need attention or money anymore
I’m no longer the person I was before
Staring into the sky, wondering what to be
Scared that I no longer know what is me

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and hopeful though a little tired.
Today I’m grateful for:
A message from my student Aoi to our class chat saying that she missed me (perhaps a little tongue in cheek) and then Jeng said he did too. I’m glad it’s not just me that feels a void after the intensity of the semesters.
The best thing about today was:
Unexpectedly being home by 10 am was pretty sweet, getting to enjoy all the things I enjoy such as reading, grooming our cats, watering the garden, putting together lesson ideas, drinking coffee and playing cards at Daytripper.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I got to school late because I knew nothing would really start until around 9 am but then when I got to the hall it was all locked up and no one was around. I went back to our building and found out that we won’t be in the hall again until next week. Ok, no problem, though I had left all my flashcards that I was making in there. I just hope they are recoverable. I asked Kru Mai what I should do today and he just shrugged and said to start putting together presentations for the next semester, which is what I would be doing whether I was at school or not anyway. I said cool, no worries and came home! I’m thankful the environment here is flexible in this way, not like at previous schools. In the afternoon I did start putting together my plans for my classes whilst enjoying coffees at Daytripper. Well, why not?
Something I learned today?
I watched a video advising how best to play barre chords on guitar. I’m still struggling with these and my hand and wrist get tired quickly so I’m looking for all the tips I can get. Want to keep playing, improve my skill and speed. It’s going to be slow for an old bloke like me.
What is something positive happening in my life right now?
I’m feeling pretty positive about everything at the moment though I’m trying to think of something specific. It’s just me and Cap here in bed, in the aircon and…and what? So long as my brain doesn’t fall into a loop of negative thoughts I consider everything positively. Ok got it. The positive thing happening in my life right now is my thoughts.

I took this picture because I thought this plant had died as all the leaves had curled up brown. I secretly held out hope but there was nothing for six months until a couple of weeks ago, new growth and now the unfurling. Amazing.

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