13th May 2022 – Like many other young teen boys, I was infatuated with Clare Grogan from Altered Images. She was just the cutest thing to me. But more than that was the band’s first single, ‘Dead Popstars’ and its b-side ‘Sentimental’ which, unfortunately, outshined all their forthcoming songs, though there were one or two cool tunes on their first album. After that, it all went a bit too commercial for my tastes.

At the time I had taken to wearing fingerless gloves which my mum would knit for me. I was still figuring out my punk fashion style but for sure would have dressed up as if to impress, so I thought. In a fit of joy, bopping around near the front of the crowd, I took off a glove and threw it on stage, where it brushed against the lovely Ms Grogan’s leg. I have an image in my mind of lots of detritus being on stage so perhaps others were throwing things too, which would seem a bit odd for a well-behaved crowd of teenyboppers in attendance.

Anyway, after the last song and many people heading for the exit, I lent over the barricade and asked the nearest bouncer to grab my glove back for me and so it was I held in my hand an object which had touched the gorgeous Clare Grogan’s leg, not to be washed for many weeks afterwards, until the smell became unbearable.