“Everything that needs to be said has already been said. But, since no one was listening, everything must be said again.” – Andre Gide
Enjoy and enjoy your life
It’s the only one you’ve got
Enjoy yourself but don’t shit on others
Save yourself, it’s worth a lot
So when someone hits you in the eye
Just get up and cry ‘I’m only gonna die!’
4th June 1984 – I’d already figured out life’s pointlessness but it hadn’t started crippling me yet. I hadn’t heard of Stoicism or memento mori yet either.
Big businessman dad
Must provide for your latest fad
Lucky boy
Birthday again you lucky boy
Daddy will buy you every toy
Daddy failed and got the sack
Next birthday you will look back
And cry
Lucky boy
Worship your god and clean your teeth
Your breath stinks of your heroes
Pray to Buddha from underneath
The sheets, wrapped in your heroes
The lying icons will never forgive
The sins that you commit
Commit to forgive
Forgive and forget
Forgot your heroes
Records of the week: Birthday Party – Mutiny, anything by the Faith, Subhumans – Cradle To The Grave
30th April 1984
Managed to get up in time. Was doing Art exam all day. Turned out all right. Lunch – had a chat with Bernice cos her and Jim ain’t getting on too well. Flash in the pan. Put strobe back in the morning. Went down track. Jasper made a new bit. Paul Miller came down. Came back – did fuckin’ ace pic on wall.
1st May 1984
Fuck knows how I woke up today. Pissed around in the library in the morning. Did English literature exam. Don’t know if I’ve done well though. Thought I’d get letter but didn’t. Went to Burd’s. Went to club. Had a decent game of snooker. Came back.
2nd May 1984
I did it again. Fuckin’ got bored in the library. Nearly everyone was doing History. Clements had a laugh with me and Mini. Afternoon did typing exam – don’t think I’ve done too well. Showing photos around to everyone. Went to Burds. Went to Houldey’s. Shit(?) Martin up. Going to watch Love At First Bite.
3rd May 1984
Get to school. Fucking Maths exam was fucking bloody hard. Don’t reckon I done well. Pissed around at lunchtime. Went up the library. Got bored up there. Fuckin’ shit(?) teachers. Went to English. 4 people were there. Went to Burd’s. Rung Zoe there. Went to club, had a decent game of snooker. Went to BMX track. There’s a swing down there now. Went to Houldey’s. Made coffee for Beki. Muz left his bike there. HaHa. Drawn rose(?) on the wall.
4th May 1984
Got to school, did Maths – was easier than yesterday. Afternoon – went to Art for a laugh – did put(?) thing. Went to library but got bored after two minutes and went back to Art. Doubled up on bus, went to Jeremy’s, was supposed to stay but came back. Rung Zoe and had a chat. Watched telly. Went to sleep.
5th May 1984
Got up. Went to Poole. Bought Subhumans and Birthday Party. Still no BF. Got bored. Came back. Saw Simon in Wimborne so got off the bus. He was pissed off because he forgot to sign on. Came back. Pissed around on moped. Zoe rang. Had a depressing chat. Went down track then up to Houldey’s where Dandy was flashing her beautiful legs. Blah Blah Blah. Went to sleep.
6th May 1984
Woke up. Took dog. Had food. All the usual shit. Went down track, bust moped up. Went to Houldey’s. Told Beki and Dandy about Jamie smoking etc. Beki getting in a right strop. Watched Sugarland Express. Went to sleep.
Save the whale in the sea of blood
Save the whale in the sea of blood
A new handbag, a new rubber
Stop the murderers good and proper
Save the whale in the sea of blood
Save the whale in the sea of blood
2nd June 2023 – By 1984 I had already been vegetarian for two years and inspired by lyrics and information from Crass, Flux of Pink Indians, Subhumans etc I dove into animal rights. One of the first places I would go to in Poole on Saturdays was a stall just outside the mall that always had stacks of provocative information. The things I saw there made me mad.
I don’t know how much of an impact the pro-animal rights movement has had in current times but I am still anti-testing on animals for anything cosmetic. Surely by now, we don’t need to test further for things like shampoo. When it comes to cures for life-threatening diseases and viruses though I am in reluctant support.
I started eating fish and some seafood again in 1998 though not all that often back then and I have been a pescatarian since – 41 years in total so far.
In the 80s it was still seen as radical to be vegetarian and I could list off plenty of reasons to become one, especially as I was asked why anytime it came up. It made me mad that I would have to justify it. These days not many people are surprised at anyone being vegetarian and if anyone does ask me why I just say ‘all the reasons.’
The phrase Save The Whale was a popular slogan inspired by the Japanese slaughter of whales for ‘science’ as they liked people to believe but when I hear the term now all I can think about is the titular Cheech and Chong song, “Save the whale, yeah save the whale, ooooo save the whale, but kill the seals!” Damn, I haven’t seen a Cheech and Chong movie in a long time!
Records of the week: The Damned – Curtain Call, Minutemen – Politics of Time LP, Self Abuse – EP
23rd April 1984
Woke up. Got bored. Roo came round. Played records. Took dog (for a walk). Went to Houldey’s. Went to track. Met everyone. Came off bike, did the steering in. Came back. Rang Zoe – she wasn’t home. Roo went home. I went out. Went down BMX track again. Bought some fags for them lot. Went back to Houldey’s and played pool. Mini – Beki’s boyfriend came round. Came back – watched Hill Street Blues. Read book. Had a wank. Fell asleep.
24th April 1984
Can’t remember a lot of what happened today. Had to take their dinner in. Took dog. Went down BMX track, pissed around, came back. Zoe rang – chatted for a while. Went down club. Burd beat me at snooker. Watched this and that. Fell asleep.
25th April 1984
Got up. Rang Burd. He came over. Took both bikes down the BMX track, had a laugh on them. Went to Houldey’s. Came back. Went to Burd’s. Got bottle of milk and petrol. Went to club. Got fags and crisps. Went to Gussage. Went to sexy Sue’s. (Ron’s them Goobers??). Went to Hinton Martell. Saw James. Went to a barn. Wimborne Football Club. Couldn’t sleep anywhere.
26th April 1984
Went to Rec. Went to barn near Rupert’s. Built walls of hay. At about 3 am we started building a roof. Went to sleep at 4 am. Woke up at 5 am. Went out for a fag. Went back in, plugged all the holes up and sat in the dark. Heard noises so scarpered. Went to Rupe’s – broke a gate. Went to Witchampton bus shelter. Burd went home. So did I. Went to sleep at 10 am. Woke up at 6 pm. Burd rang. Zoe rang.
27th April 1984
Woke up. Pissed around. Went down track. Burt and Jasp came down. Then Scott. Then Jamie. Four of us went to Stanbridge. Met Carly and Priscilla. Got some fags for Priscilla. Came back. Went back to BMX track. Came back. Rung Burd. He came over and decided to stay. Went to Houldey’s, had a game of pool. They went for a walk so we chased them. Went down to the BMX track in dark. Came back. Rang Zoe earlier. Had a chat. Pissed around in my room. Got to sleep about 2 am.
28th April 1984
Woke up at 9. Burd wouldn’t let me sleep. He went at 10. Took dog. Went to BMX track. Watched Holt lose 5-0 or something. Came back. Zoe rang – talked for an hour. She’s finished with Andy. Watched telly all night whilst pissed around with Art. Been pretty depressed today. Must be missing Zoe.
29th April 1984
Not cheered up much. Went down to track. Started a new bit of track round the back. Came back. When I went to ring Zoe, kept getting a number in Coventry. Managed to get through by the operator. Had a chat with Zoe. Can’t remember owt else. Did more on the wall.
He did a good job when he hit me in the gob
He took me out and gave me a clout
And I was spitting blood, spitting blood
He hit me in the face, put me in my place
He showed me where to go, after hitting me on the nose
Spitting blood, blood
30th May 2023 – If we got to Bournemouth during the afternoon we would grab some lagers and cider and sit around the graveyard next to the car park where Capones was on the top floor. There were often other punks around getting drunk and being generally reckless. It was quiet and secluded so no one really bothered you there. You can see from the picture there was a lot of tree cover and the paths through were really only for folks wishing to attend graves, which didn’t seem to happen very often.
Mary Shelley is buried in this graveyard – something which I just learned this minute! I wouldn’t have known who she was in 1984.
30th Oct 2024 – Shared with Word of the Day Challenge – graveyard
Record of the week: Ian Dury – Sweet Gene Vincent, The Mob – Let The Tribe Increase LP, Self Abuse – Soldier, Sex Gang Children – Mauritia Mayer
16th April 1984
Couldn’t get to sleep. Only about 3 hours. Mum had a laugh at us sleeping together, stayed in bed with Zoe most of the day. We went to Wimborne and both spent her money. Met Jim who was looking for Bernice. Came back on bus. Zoe didn’t feel too well. Got back into bed. Jim came round. Took some photos. Sat and talked. Me and Zoe got up to things while Jim was singing the Jam. Still couldn’t get to sleep. Eventually did.
17th April 1984
Got 7 hours sleep. Mum came up to wake us up. Huh. Got up. Burd came round. Did some songs with drums. Rupe came along. Took some photos. Jim went. Came back in. Did this and that. Jim came back. Muz came round. Me and Zoe went into other bedroom. Them lot came in doing moonies. Zoe weren’t feeling too well again. Went down the rubbish dump – ‘ad a laugh. All sorts happened – some too rude to mention. Put on DOA.
18th April 1984
Got 4 hours sleep. Woke up Rupe. Watched breakfast TV. Woke Jim and Burd up who slept in the other room. Went out, took some photos. Took Zoe down to Bournemouth. She got on bus. Went back to Wimborne. Met Jim, Burd and Rupe. Jim went on. We went to Dan’s. Bernice ill. Met Jim again. Went to Dan’s. Went round Wimborne. Met this girl who fancied Roo. Hung a tampon on a tree. Pissed around (?) Rupert to this girl. Came back on bus. Really missing Zoe. Still got a buzz from the last couple of days. Had a chat to Zoe on the phone – both unhappy.
19th April 1984
Woke up 11. Played Zoe’s favourite records. Had an apple. Can’t stop thinking about Zoe. Took dog (for a walk). Did some art for my exam. Drew Zoe. Wrote a decent poem. Waiting for Zoe to ring at 6. 6.30 – she hadn’t rung so I rang her. She wasn’t there. Went out to play drums. Zoe rang. We talked for about 50 minutes. I was glad to hear her voice. Went to Burd’s. Roo was there. Went down bus shelter. Talked about the party. Rung Roo’s girl up – had a laugh. Came home. Played Mauritia Mayer and Christian Death.
20th April 1984
Woke up. Gave my mum card and presents. Read book. Ate food. Went to Houldey’s. They gave me some wine. Came back. Dandy and Becky came in. Then went. Zoe rang – thank god. I’m really missing her. Talked for a while. Went to Houldey’s later again. It was Mr H’s birthday today as well. Came back, put on Christian Death with strobe and Mauritia Mayer.
21st April 1984
Got up. Fucked around. Decided to go to Poole. So went to see Pam who’s doing alright. Saw Dusty. Went down Poole. Saw Justin. Saw Lisa and her mate – went to park to drink cider. Came back. Zoe rang. Had a chat. Can’t stop thinking about her. Went to Houldey’s I think, I dunno. Came back. Watched Woody Allen – fucking good film. Can’t remember anything else.
22nd April 1984
Got up – practised drums. Ate food. Rang Zoe – had a nice chat. Had a bath – I was smelling a bit, and went to Houldey’s – took Mauritia Mayer. Went down BMX track. Met Jamie and Burty. Went back to Houldey’s. Came home. Went back – cleaned Beki’s window. Took record back. Went down BMX – had a laugh. Bought some fags. Went to Houldey’s. Came back. Watched film. Made semolina. Went to bed.
Saturday, it was very hot
It was hotter when I saw her
Tiny bikini and baggy shirt
No one on the beach could ignore her
So I went over and said
‘How about it? Fancy making a go?’
She turned around and looked up
And she sweetly said ‘no’
30th May 2023 – This poetic story is total fantasy. I never had the guts to talk to girls back then. ‘Bit of stuff’ seems to have fallen out of favour as a sexist term for pretty girls, probably for the best but no doubt replaced with a million others.
1994ever 