On Waiting – 28th June 2021

Dull day, inexplainable, darkened skies
Greying mind, inexplicable meaningless whys
Each day, unknowable, a morning shine
Bright mind, lovable, this day divine


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to work out and meditate in Kim’s room and be distracted by her running around like crazy. She makes me smile and distracts me from my own problems.

We got that attitude! – 27th June 2021

I am so happy and grateful for the free money that the government gave us to spend on food and household items. We got spendy and went to the blue shop and pick up lots of goodies.


There are some rumours about having to teach online until the end of July or even til the end of the semester in late September. That’s tough for everyone and making me think about how to make the lessons more engaging, but I’m also feeling extremely lazy about it all too.

It’s not fun to be at school where there has been a case of Covid, and the Thai teachers still won’t wear masks. It’s much easier for me to teach from home, but at school, I have to depend on the student’s own motivation more. It’s just a technological issue, but it’s frustrating that we are not offered a choice. If I was a student, I wouldn’t bother to attend my classes – as some of the students are already choosing.

Ellen is planning more IELTS teaching coming up too. That’s nice and pays well, but I don’t always feel confident doing it and it takes a lot of planning too.

Anyway, the best things about this weekend was coffee at Utopia, getting more posts on my blog, a bit of reading and a bit of watching football. Time goes too fast though – and it’s always hot! I love aircon but real cool air would be perfect from time to time.

Chicken Hawker – 25th June 2021

The fried chicken stand roars each morning
Burning oil since the early dawning
You know it’s bad – ‘But it’s delicious’
There’s things inside so suspicious
Feel your organs, pumping, throbbing
As arteries are slowly clogging
The chicken man holds a scythe
Death comes along to claim his tithe


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to have this little book to write my notes in. I prefer to write with pen and paper rather than using an app.

No Punk Intended – 24th June 2021

Slamming into each other
Having so much fun
It’s a heaving circle pit
Until each song is done
But someone is down
On the slippery floor they slid
Someone should help them up
But no punk in ten did

The skins have come with bats
Meting out some violence
What to do about them?
Just met with silence
The beatings had started
The punks all run and hid
Stand up all together
But no punk in ten did


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that it is Thursday and I only have two classes today and will finish at 1.30 so will have lots of free time. I plan to draw a picture of Tokyo to give to Gui as a gift.

Poems on this day – 23rd June 2021

Conkers

We marched ever onward
Til we conquered all around
Spilled blood, spread disease
Put generations in the ground
Now the march is inward
To conquer our own mind
What then becomes of us
After what we find?

Godsnake

Some absurd things make us laugh
While others they offend
But if you cannot laugh at yourself
You’ll be angry until your end
You can have your faith and eat it
Not everyone feels the same
Our beliefs are as absurd as each others
Let’s not apportion blame

Legacy of GG

Ugly is art, all the same
No judgement on defect
It deserves respect
Only opinion, it’s in the name
It could be a mistake
Art for art’s sake
Like it or leave it
Opinions aren’t facts
So just relax
If you don’t believe it
Existing is real
Whatever you feel
Fame can be fleeting
Soon passing on by
Even after you die
Those people you’re meeting
Will return to the sky
Just as you and I


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the delicious smells coming from the kitchen this morning as Amy prepares me my lunch – chilli jam fake duck. The fake meats here are many and varied and I’m grateful for all the choices.

Psyche’s Mistake – 22rd June 2021

If you looked deeply and saw it was not real
Everything stripped away so you could no longer feel
Would that mean that all the things from the past
Never really happened now they no longer last?
Was it all a lie? Memories that now fade
Was it even you and those mistakes you made?
Maidens become wolves, jewels become dust
I cherish it all, for happiness I must
Unrelenting winds whipped into a chill
Forever into oblivion, remnants laying still

You Bring Out The English In Me – 21st June 2021

I’m sorry to say, it’s your fault
It’s all the stupid things I see
Sarcasm is the default result
You bring out the English in me

“That’s just great, that’s amazing!”
While I wonder what the fuck you’re doing
What I mean and say are not the same thing
Over the horizon, trouble is brewing

It’s a culture clash, war with words
I see things I should never see
Slower than thirty-three and a thirds
You bring out the English in me


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be able to work from home today. Finally, someone at the school made the right decision for teachers to work from home due to the Covid case at school. It is the sensible decision!


Well, the students came back to school last Monday on a treacherous day of torrential rain, and it was good to see them all again. By Friday, the school was closed again due to a case of Covid that the school knew about on that first day but kept to themselves in the hope that it wouldn’t be a big deal. So typical of the Thai style. It’s very frustrating.

On Monday, Nancy was also constantly hassling me to cash her cheque and transfer her money. I was unable to get to a bank, but Amy offered to transfer it if I put some money into her account. I transferred from my account without realising it took me below the threshold needed for my visa application, which was summarily rejected on Tuesday! Now, I have to change to a 60-day visitor visa and re-apply again. I was so annoyed that it became funny.

Thailand has not endeared itself to me this week. I started wondering about leaving. We are only made to feel welcome here if we spend money. We will never be accepted as equals – sometimes it feels like a punishment for the luck of being born in a ‘better’ society. Revenge jealousy.

Anyway, I can play with my cats and the dog from next door. I still have books to read. Fuck frustration!

Avoid The Plague Like The Plague – 19th June 2021

Just wear the goddamn mask
Is that too much for me to ask
You got the vaccine, lucky you
Show some respect for others too
The situation is far from vague
So I must avoid you, like the plague

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that we can afford to furnish our spare room so that Kim Chi has space to be her own. If we faced the same situation in our old house in Chatswood it would have been impossible. We are so fortunate – as is Kim.