On Top – 10th December 2023

What is to be done once at the mountaintop?
Once having surveyed the delights to be seen
Can you shout into the valleys till the echoes stop?
Telling all who care to wonder where you’ve been

Counting the cost when the afternoon storm arrives
There’s no magic lantern to wish you safe and sound
Darwin showed us that the smartest one survives
Keeping their heads down back home on the ground

6th Dec 2024 – Shared with Poets and Storytellers – adventures


Today I’m feeling:

Exhausted! But happily so. I had a disrupted sleep with having to deal with the results of the spicy seafood sauce from last night as it got stuck straight into my bowels!

But I got up easily and quickly at 6.30 and we set off biking again soon after. We took a very dodgy detour that took us so far into the unknown, wondering if we’d ever make it back.

In a tiny village tucked in between cornrow hills, an old Auntie and uncle, who seemed a little unaccustomed to Thai, and even more so to two dirty farangs emerging through their dog-infested dirt tracks, helped stave off some thirst and hunger with a grocery of delights hidden in a shack underneath reams of old corrugated iron but do be sure to take off your shoes! Nervous dogs sniffed nervously, on the constant scavenge.

It felt like we were making good time but a breakdown in here would’ve consumed the rest of the day and it wasn’t even 8am yet.

Already shaken from intermittent dodgy rocky roads, it dawned that there was another hour and a half of this ahead!

In most part beautiful but also at times frustratingly shaky, I prayed little Fino could hold itself together.

Today I’m grateful for:

Little Fino performing, as one would reasonably expect any modern piece of expensive motoring machinery, magnificently despite the abuse I brought forth on it over the last two days. I would not be surprised if he sounds a bit cranky in the morning.

The best thing about today was:

Getting to Chiang Rai and familiar surroundings was a welcome feeling. At least if something went wrong here I had some idea of where to head for help.

After our morning wilderness adventure, I told Bruno there was no need to wait for me and we made our way separately North from Lampang.

I took some minor detours and when back into recognisable territory I decided to follow the Mae Lao klong (which was sublime) up past Singha Park and then back off the highway after following cute girls on what must have been their boyfriend’s souped-up motorbikes, that popped so loudly as they flew past fuel tankers whilst desperately clasping their phones in one hand.

Past the prison and up into Mae Yao through the back of Bandu and the university and delivered, finally, to my first coffee of the day back at home in Utopia! That coffee was the best ever!

It was already 2 pm and my ears were still full of wind, my hands shaking from hours of gripping the handlebars, and my eyes and clothes full of smoke and dust. It felt so good to be back home!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Lots of things were out of my control today and I happily went along with everything. I’m pretty easy to please.

Something I learned today?

The ACTUAL axis of evil seems to be the USA, Zionists and…… well, an axis only needs two, doesn’t it?

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Spending a few baht in a village shop to give the locals some income, though I think Bruno actually paid!

In another village where Bruno stopped to stuff himself with som tum, the family there were so tickled to be serving a couple of ‘crackers’ and we happily obliged them with photos, which I hope they print out and put up one day to fade in the dust and sun of posterity.

If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

The way I was raised was fine, even great. The circumstances could have been different though. However, because my father died before I even knew him I never knew what it was like to have and lose him. I wonder how much impact that has had on my personality and life in general?

My mum was very liberal with me and I got to make plenty of my own mistakes. I grew up slowly. Like most teenagers, I thought I knew everything and I could fake being mature. My mum generally left me to it.

I took this picture because this is what we spent three hours traversing the back end of beyond to come and see. An emerald lagoon in a sinkhole in the jungle mountains near Lampang. The fish in there are huge and we wondered how they got there. Signs for no swimming, fishing or feeding the fish. There’s nothing else here except for a couple of big trees and once you’ve looked up and then back down again, you’ve seen a big tree. For some reason, the car park seemed to be able to accommodate a fleet of tour buses yet it’s at the end of a dirt track that a tour bus wouldn’t be able to navigate. The shop was on the far side of the car park so when we arrived a lady jumped on her motorbike and came to a makeshift stall next to the lagoon entrance, we happily wandered by on both entry, and fifteen minutes later on exit, and she happily rode her bike back across the car park to the shop. It was only 10 am. Maybe busloads of Koreans swamp the place come the afternoons?

Stick In The Mud – 7th September 2021

I love the adventure more than you
Sidetracks make me curious
But not knowing where we’re going
So often make you furious

I love to find dead-end tracks
Just to see what’s there
It doesn’t matter we have to turn around
I don’t really care

When roads turn to tracks of dirt
My curiosity begins to rise
There may be nothing there but
I want to see with my own eyes

Yes, I got stuck that time
But adventure is what I had
Eventually, I got out of the mud
It wasn’t really so bad


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my stupidity and smarts. Yesterday I took a shortcut home in the car and got stuck in some mud, miles from anyone (stupid). I broke off some branches and leaves to get traction under the tyres (smart) and with some brute strength and will, managed to get out again after 15 minutes (strength).


Took the car to get washed inside and out today after my little adventure getting stuck in the mud when trying to take a shortcut home. I was quite pleased with myself at getting out of it though.

Amy would have been very pissed off if I had to leave the car there and call her Dad! Just thinking about the scenarios while writing this is making me chuckle a bit. Anyway, our car looks good now.

Two classes today – pretty easy time at the moment, lots of reading; A Thousand Splendid Suns. I’m really intrigued about Afghanistan, especially with it being in the news so much right now. I doubt I’lll ever go there so I’ll just be content with watching documentaries or reading more.

We got that attitude! – 31st May 2020

I am so happy and grateful that I got up early and decided to go for a ride. Despite bad sunburn, I went to some amazing places and saw so many beautiful things that filled me with such joy. So happy!

To-do list

  • Get up early and go! ✅
  • Get some more June blog posts prepared
  • More reading
  • Try the long meditation again
  • Jigsaw and Inner Engineering½

The get-up-and-go went exactly to plan and I was hoping that I would get back before it got too hot. Unfortunately, I didn’t get back until around 4pm and am burnt crispy, suffering burning pains on my arms and knees. The ride was incredible though.

My thoughts were filled with joy and I was savouring the moment so strongly I thought I might cry. I smiled and laughed at everyone I saw as I ran out of sealed roads and discovered many 10-house hill tribe villages as I went higher and higher. I joked with myself that I got tired of seeing so much beauty.

I’m so happy to have done this ride today. Tomorrow I hope I’m not in too much pain!

I’m stuck here and I know it (Shenzhen) – 1st May 2001

Labor Day Holiday. I thought there was people everywhere before but now it’s even worse. I can’t help laughing at all the people who stare!! So far, this trip seems like a series of little adventures – perhaps little adventures are what makes up a life and when you stop having those adventures you stop living. My life should only be adventure. I want to live. This is a beautiful temple – but spoilt by crass commercialism. I would like to find somewhere peaceful and tranquil – this place has tacky shops selling junk. And popcorn – I can’t believe it! One woman’s eyes nearly popped out when she saw my tattoos….makes me laugh!

Just remember that every single person in this world is different. But all human.

Your thoughts are chosen, your world is advertising now – 25th March 1994

Here you are again dear reader.  I’m currently sat here in the van waiting for my physio appointment.  Some old man politely hassling me about how long I’m going to be parked here cos he wants to put his car here.

Had a weird dream last night that involved a known paedophile and bestial man who I saw running naked down a street chasing a pig.  I was with a bunch of youngsters (11 to 12-year-olds) and to show them that this man was wrong I beat him the ground and pissed all over him!  Knowing he’d be mad at me I ran to the next town and went to where I lived (?) with Martin B(!) on a houseboat(!!!).  The man had got there already and had stolen Martin’s dog!  Jeez, what does all that mean I wonder?

Me and my baby are often in dispute these days and I wonder what it is that’s changed.  We are both of strong character but very forgiving so most arguments are laid to rest quickly but what is it that creates them?  Is it being together every night?  Is it how I am busy in the evenings and Broni just wants to relax?  I can’t help busying myself, it’s the only time I get to do things that I like (ie reading, writing etc).  I know these things are mostly to do on my own and in some ways that’s not fair but I do also take time and trouble to make Bronwyn happy.  It is difficult living with someone even if you are as madly in love with each other as we are. 

I wonder if things were any easier a hundred years ago when the men ruled the roost?  I honestly don’t think I could do that in this day and age, though it seems plenty of people still do.  I’m increasingly appalled by man’s treatment of women.  Why is there a page three girl?  Why so many (any) pornographic magazines?  Women blatantly used to sell everything.  Where in the world can I go to get away from it?  Where do people live in some sort of harmony?  With respect?

Sometimes I feel myself falling into these traps because they are ever present, bombarded at you from every media angle.  What future for our children?  So many decisions are made by few people who believe they know what’s best for the majority.

Anyway, I’ve been thinking about Rich and how it’d be nice if he loosened up a bit!  He and Rob have their fair share of arguments I understand, and they live together.  Rich tells me some of the tales but I must confess to not being very sympathetic.  He’s on holiday in Europe right now so maybe that’ll relax him up a bit. 

Mostly the other things on my mind involve Australia.  Everyone’s wishing me luck for when I go. (Hey, I caught up with Little Crabby in Safeways and heard the latest gossip!  His parents got divorced!  Wow!  Murray’s still the same and Jasper’s a pothead!  Double wow!  I remember he wouldn’t touch that stuff when I had it!).  I can’t wait to get to Australia – I think it’s going to be a great adventure and a turning point in my life.

I heard someone talking about their destiny the other day and whether they put their success down to luck but he said it was just about making choices and he was positive in his thinking and therefore made the right choices.  This is the way I will be and I know I’m making the right choice in going to Australia.  I know that this country has little to offer me unless I want to work my ass off for the next 50 years (dying in the next 10 from stomach ulcers).

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I’m in search of that harmonious world, not expecting to find but just happy searching.

I want to mention that Kerry has given up drinking and has slimmed down considerably over the last four weeks.  I mention this on looking back at previous entries when she was drunk!  Just wanted to put that straight.