Tag: AFL

Step Into The Light – 21st September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments
Image Credit: Danial Burka @ Unsplash

So tired of being in the dark and all alone

There’s still a mountain to climb
And will the promise there hold true?

Step into the light I keep telling myself…

Step into the light I keep telling myself…

Step into the light I keep telling myself…

Submitted to WDYS #254 (above picture prompt). The title and first line is from Archers of Loaf’s ‘Step Into The Light’ and constitute the whole of its lyric! I haven’t added much more but it represents the dark headspace I’ve found myself in recently.

My reply to this post about sitting on the fence and UK politics

I could admire Thatcher as a woman dealing with a man’s world, but as a politician I despised her.

It’s impossible to say how things would have gone if she was never elected but I see the decline of the UK starting with her.

I appreciate that things were on the decline before that but this was visible during my lifetime and one of the reasons I was glad to leave the UK in the 90’s.

“Is it so wrong to sit on the fence?” – I constantly consider this, perhaps a reflection of my own Englishness. People who don’t sit on the fence seem to have more charisma and confidence but I find the world far more grey.

I also consider that I shouldn’t express an opinion if I am not fully aware of the facts.

Today I’m feeling:

A little dizzy and out of sorts. I was up early to get to my hospital appointment and forgot to even grab a coffee first.

As I was driving here, just over the bridge, there was a loose flock of sheep on the highway and one had been hit and killed, lying in the middle of the road.

There’s still garbage and drying mud everywhere at the sides of the roads and the vague fences that used to hold in animals are all flattened.

Health:

Physical: 6
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Not taking too long at the hospital this morning and getting back to enjoy a couple of coffees before lunch.

The ENT doctor didn’t seem too worried and just prescribed some more meds and told me to come back in two weeks’ time.

The best thing about today was:

Finishing reading Childhood’s End and enjoying it a lot.

It got me in the mood to watch Interstellar tonight as my student Film kept raving about it. I enjoyed it too, but only really appreciated it in the last 20 minutes or so when some of the earlier parts of the movie started to make sense.

I think I will lend Film Childhood’s End to read. His English is pretty great and I think he can understand most of it and would enjoy it.

Something I learned today?

I know what my throat looks like now after having a tube camera stuck in my mouth. Apart from the mucus stuck inside, things in there look good and healthy.

Brisbane managed to get over Geelong today in a tough match, losing one of their players to injury too.

It bodes well for the Swans next week, except for a couple of things.

Today, Brisbane played at the MCG, where next week’s game will be played. They are also last year’s losing finalists, which gives them extra motivation.

Having said that, most of our team played in the losing final the year before that, so that motivation is there for us too.

Thinking about following sports is something that at least keeps me focused on the now. I understand the appeal to others of sports that I have no interest in.

No Refunds – 20th September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Bread and water are all that’s served
At the Epicurean diner
300 dollars for the wisdom observed
But no wine for the whiner!

Inspired (possibly ripped off) by Existential Comics 552

Today I’m feeling:

Dizzy and tired still, though a little better mentally.

I think I’m understanding a little more about why I’m feeling the way I am mentally.

My routine involves teaching and writing and those both keep me in the now. Whenever I’m not doing those things, I have been updating my blog or watching things relevant to my past ie. nostalgic.

Due to the flooding and school being closed, my routine has been upended and I haven’t been doing things that have kept me rooted in the now and way too much thinking about the past.

This has got me contemplating too much about things outside my control. Perhaps it was sitting for hours (in the now) at the hospital yesterday that has brought all this into focus.

So, now aware of this, I can think about how to improve my thoughts and situation.

I slept ok until some point in the night I had indigestion and then remembered that I had drunk two bottles of soda water in the evening, something I know will get my guts rumbling when I’m lying down to sleep. I’m a slow learner.

Health:

Physical: 6
Mental: 6

Today I’m grateful for:

To the student in the shop who read the staff with my shopping list (see below).

The best thing about today was:

Sydney beating Port to make another grand final. I managed to listen on the radio, which is certainly not exciting at all and really difficult to follow but at least I was able to keep up with the game.

I’ll watch the mini-match tomorrow and enjoy that.

I’ll probably listen to the Geelong/Brisbane game too and hope that they belt the shit out of each other to make it tougher next week for whoever is the winner.

Something I learned today?

Amy asked me to pick some stuff up at the auntie’s store at Fah Tai market and sent me a list written in Thai. When I showed it to the boy working at the shop, he apologised and told me that he couldn’t read. I guess he just gets by ok on speaking.

A Lull; A Crisis – 14th September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 19 Comments

A Lull

Lulled into obedience
Cocooned in a routine
Lulling in a language
The soft belly fattened
Lulled back to sleep
A thief’s hand in the pocket
A lull in the fighting
Fresh-faced provincial naivety


A Crisis

Always in need of a crisis
To keep putting up prices
Push the thorn in deeper
Make this pain a keeper
Today was another bad day
Another breath stolen away
A cake built from glitter and guns
Towards the battle runs


A Lull; A Crisis

Lulled into obedience, always in need of a crisis
Cocooned in a routine to keep putting up prices
Lulling in a language, push the thorn in deeper
The soft belly fattened make this pain a keeper
Lulled back to sleep, today was another bad day
A thief’s hand in the pocket, another breath stolen away
A lull in the fighting, a cake built from glitter and guns
Fresh-faced provincial naivety towards the battle runs

6th Jun 2025 – Shared with dVerse OLN #385

Today I’m feeling:

Lazy again. The dark grey sky has returned with a light, constant rain. Even though I woke up and got up at 7 to feed the cats, I went back to bed and, after reading for a while, dozed a little too.

As I was driving out for coffee this morning, I was thinking about how I generally only feel motivated when I have to go to work. When I have some pressure to be doing one thing, then I’m really motivated to do another thing! This feeling is making me concerned about actual retirement. I have to figure out a way to be motivated when there is nothing else to do!

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Amy getting us motivated and out of the house. At about 11.30, she said that we should get some old clothes together and donate them to people who need them at the moment. Lots of people are donating food but so much of it is getting thrown away as it is going off before it can be distributed.

It is a little heartening to see how people are pulling together to help each other and even to watch some folks laughing as they clean up the mud around their houses.

Others are not so happy, though. I dropped by House on the way into the city. Gui wasn’t there – he decided to stay in a hotel – so I talked a little with his mum (as best I could anyway) and she showed me inside the shop, which is a disaster, as is their front room, kitchen and bathroom, the back garden and even the parking area.

His mum couldn’t be sure how long before they could get everything sorted and the shop open again. Maybe even up to three months. I think Gui might just give up. Others who are renting their shops will be facing the same questions.

Tokyo heard me talking to Gui’s mum and barked from the safety of the terrace above the kitchen. She soon ran down and through all the mud to jump up at me as I had a snack waiting for her. She is oblivious to what is going on around her.

The best thing about today was:

Getting up and about and not just lying down at home reading or watching TV. I was also informed that school won’t open again until Thursday at the earliest, though that may change as I heard that clean-up had already started.

After seeing some of the damage in the area today, though, I can understand why it’s not just a matter of the school but also of the affected students, too.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Driving around the city and particularly the area near my school brought home the amount of damage that folks there are dealing with. All the roads are a mess of garbage and mud. Animals are loose, fields are empty and flattened and even some walls were knocked down or foundations for poles and fences so soft that they have keeled over.

We felt very subdued by it all and even though people are pulling together there’s a sort of bewilderment in the air. About 80% of shops are closed, whether they are affected by the water or not. The economy was already struggling and this is another setback to recovery.

Something I learned today?

Brisbane scraped through their final with the Giants and I listened to it live on the radio though as I wasn’t particularly invested in either I was also doing other things until the final ten minutes or so.

That means Brisbane will play Geelong and Sydney will play Port. Could end up being a Sydney Geelong grand final again and it will bring back memories of getting absolutely smashed by them in the grand final two or three years ago, whenever it was.

Well, we have to get there first and I will listen live a little more intently on Friday for sure.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

Donating a lot of clothes and pillows was appreciated by the folks doing the organising of the distribution. I hope that they end up getting to people who really need them. There may be a few villagers who end up with ni-hao! And SpeechOdd t-shirts that were too big for me.

The Infection – 6th September 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Let’s get serious
This is no time to sleep
Now we’re in business
Gulp the air in deep
Let’s get serious
This is no drum circle of friends
Roar out your heart
As if your life depends
Laugh until it hurts
And all that’s broken mends
Let’s get serious

A fold poem variation inspired by the folks I used to see in the park every Saturday morning when I took my son to swimming class. I forget their group’s name but they were essentially a Laughter Club and would stand in a circle and force themselves to laugh loudly. Submitted to dVerse’s Poetics: Just for Laughs prompt.

Today I’m feeling:

A little blurry but a little better again. I still have phlegm stuck in my throat but it’s not as intense as before. I’m starting to get back to normal.

It was also good to get back to school today and get me off my lazy ass and into the maelstrom of kid craziness.

(Later) By the end of the day, I’m feeling almost back to normal and motivated again. Hooray!

Health:

Physical: 7
Mental: 7

Today I’m grateful for:

Still being motivated enough when I got home to get out into my room and get some stuff sorted, though I ran out of energy before I could play any guitar.

The best thing about today was:

Enjoying all my classes today, made more entertaining by there being fewer students and being able to spend more time interacting.

It probably helped that everyone was in a good mood, as we all only had one day of school this week.

I also think that I will try to copy the format of today’s lessons, as they were relatively simple compared with some that I try to teach.

Something I learned today?

Hawthorn smashed the Bulldogs tonight, so both Geelong and Hawthorn are looking good right now. The Swans game is tomorrow and I am nervous and excited. It’s going to be a tough task to win the Premiership this year.

Cameo – 4th August 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 14 Comments

Stage left
Enigmatically
Entranced; entranced her audience
“There she is!”
The crowd’s breath held; rapturously
Applauded and exited
Stage right

Submitted to What’s Going On – A Cameo Appearance.
Cameo is a seven-line syllable count, unrhymed poem invented by English poet Alice Spokes. It has 2-5-8-3-8-7-2 syllables per line, for a total of 35 syllables.

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and sick again, though not too terrible, just lacking energy and motivation. My throat is getting more sore and I’m full of medicines.

Today I’m grateful for:

Not having to do anything today, and that is pretty much what I did. 

The best thing about today was:

I watched another five episodes of The Boys to finish off the first season. It was good but the comics were more fun.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

After coffee, I came home to watch the football and was hoping that the Swans could get their act together but they got trounced by Port and now look less likely to win anything else this year. Oh well. 

Something I learned today?

I watched a video about dead hangs and how not to push them too much. I haven’t done it much recently and should get back to it.

Charites – 29th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 13 Comments

Joy, belligerent and hypnotic
Cast a shadow of charity
Over the long promontory
A fat man, roly-poly round

Abundance in a city of kindness
A broad island for a little boy
A fungal cloud, a phoenix
A beautiful desiccation

Radiance rose from the river
That molten river of fire
Gratification of vengeance
Narrows victory to defeat

Charity bestowed from wings
Of fury fanning the skies
Attendant to the goddess of love
Love shall burn all

This poem was inspired by the story of Richard Feynman and a phrase taken from his story about three students/assistants that became known as the Three Graces. Researching the Three Graces led me back to Greek Mythology (hence the title and theme of the poem). The image of the phoenix rising is then tied back to the science of the nuclear age and the events of August 1945 in Japan. Nagasaki means long promontory and Hiroshima means broad island and also sometimes city of kindness. The bombs were called little boy and fat man. The phoenix rising highlights the rise of Asia since those events.

Submitted to No Theme Thursday (and the attached picture), Weekly Prompts Wednesday Challenge – Hypnotic, Weekend Writing Prompt #374 – Belligerent (though a little more than the 68 words specified), Ragtag Daily Prompt – fire, FOWC with Fandango — Narrow and Word of the Day Challenge – gratification.

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good, getting up at 8 am and soon out for coffee.  Whilst at Utopia, I worked on some poetry which came out pretty well, I think.

Without any other real plans for the day, I got myself into my room in the morning and started adding more old 1998 and 2009 entries to the blog.

Revived with lunch, I got back in there and did more, all the while listening to music I’ve downloaded in the past 12 months or so and deciding to either keep or delete.  Finally, an hour or so of guitar playing too.

Today I’m grateful for:

My former self for being smart enough to keep some of my old emails that remind me of times past.  There is a lot of other stuff that is no longer accessible, though, unfortunately.

The best thing about today was:

Getting a poem highlighted on AllPoetry.com, which was nice to find this morning and generated some extra commenters.  I’ve been happy with what I’ve been writing recently and it’s nice to get some positive feedback.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

This morning I also watched the mini-match of the Swans game and it was obvious within a couple of minutes that it wasn’t going to be a good day for us.  

Still top of the table but with 4 losses in the last five games, our form is not inspiring confidence as we come towards the difficult end of the season.

Something I learned today?

Part of the problem with Australia’s high-priced housing is that not enough houses are being built for all the people who are either moving there or looking to move out of their family homes.  I was surprised that there were just 170,000 homes built in one year.  The lack of availability pushes up rents and house prices.

The average income required to buy a house now is 250K per year but the actual average income is only 120K.

It’s making me wonder where I might end up.  Australia is still the most appealing place in the Western world, though.  New Zealand may be an option at some point, I suppose.

I took this picture because this new flower in the garden stood out as I walked back into the house this morning.

The Albatross – 13th July 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

The crab said to the albatross
“Can you take me from here?”
“Where do you wish to go?”
Asked the albatross
“Anywhere away from these sad rocks,
To the skies!”
The albatross said “Hop in”
And opened wide his mouth
Enjoying a difficult meal

Submitted to dVerse Quadrille #203 – crab

Today I’m feeling:

A little better with my hip, though it kept me tossing and turning all night last night and so when it was light this morning, I just got up.  It was only 7am but I felt better for moving.

I had to deal with an army of ants biting my feet in the kitchen as they were retreating inside from the rain overnight.  Sadly for them, they are all dead now!

I started doing some weeding before heading off for coffee.  I don’t know why.  I just saw one and then kept going.

As I was about to get on the bike, the neighbour told me that they will concrete our drives today and so I can park over the road at Auntie’s, where there is lots of space.  Everything should be finished soon, making our road much easier to traverse.

As our gardeners were due this morning, I asked Amy to cancel them but they insisted on coming.  I guess they need money and know that we are reliable to pay them.

Today I’m grateful for:

The gardeners again.  I’m glad that they came in the end as our grass is cut nice and short again making it less likely for snakes to travel through.  From my quick inspection it seems that they didn’t manage to destroy any cactuses this time too.

The best thing about today was:

Tangmo coming to visit us a couple of times. After coffee in the morning and grabbing some Swenson’s ice cream, picking up Amy and coming home I’ve done a lot of TV watching and hip resting.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The pain in my hip is out of my control and there’s not much I can do about it. I’m hoping a bit more recovery tonight, otherwise I’ll have to go and waste some time at the hospital.

Something I learned today?

The Swans won this week, smashing the Kangaroos by 79 points. Not a difficult opponent but good to get another win after the small loses over the last two weeks.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I met Nong Kratae at Utopia this morning and she asked me if I would come and help her once a month, as her high school-aged students need more information about IELTS study.  

I told her that I could come along one time and see what it is that I might be able to offer.

I took this picture because Piti was doing his best sexy pose this morning.

Shadowman – 30th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 5 Comments
Englehart

Wound tight, played precise
A night fight, all that jazz
Voodoo spell, doll will dance
Deadside hell and razzmatazz
Pagan sages, a ragtime roll
Inner rages in shadow hours
Pinprick pain, man divided
Ridden insane by fiendish powers

Inspired by the original run of the Shadowman comic. Submitted to FOWC with Fandango – tight and precise along with the Word of the Day Challenge – jazz

Bennu is a Heron 2023全新EP -「despite the world is so big, but not a corner belongs to me」現已上線。
四曲自我記錄忠實呈現，獻給2019 – 2022的我們，祝好。

Home, Sweet Home
「未曾問你來自哪裡。」
關於家，關於身份，關於歸屬，關於靈魂的容納之處。

Injurer
「你還像從前那般？」
關於憤怒，關於立場，關於公義，關於變成曾經憎恨的人。

My Dream
「昨晚睡得好嗎？」
關於愛，關於記憶，關於留戀，關於每一個不眠之夜。

Fairy Tale
「你啟程後，不會再回來了吧。」
關於海，關於浪漫，關於自我，關於不設限的未知旅程。

實體將於10月發售

Vinyl release is a DIY worldwide co-operative with:
Desperate Infant Records
Qiii Snacks Records
Sango Records
ungulates
22 Records
Calm Lake Records
tenzenmen
Gizzmoix Records 

Originally digitally released by Sango Records @sangorecords and Desperate Infant Records @desperate.infant.records
Recording by 伟松&拓坤@RC Studio, Nam@Zhuying Studio and Sam@Home
Mixing / Mastering by Brian@Sound Blade Studio
Artwork by Jumpgate, Saki, Yellow and Jinbo

Bennu is a Heron (Guangzhou, China)
贝努是只苍鹭，来自广州的 Skramz / Emoviolence 乐团，由多支 Hardcore 乐团的乐手组成。 以所见、所闻、所想为出发点，直白陈述内心情绪。
Vocal – Jinbo
Guitars – Sam & Joe
Bass – Gao
Drums – Chal

Today I’m feeling:

Still a little dusty and vague. Predictably, last night I didn’t sleep well as indigestion bothered my stomach and the oysters bothered my guts. 

A really vivid poop dream got me out of bed as the oysters decided to make their early exit and it was a struggle to get a good deep sleep after that.

Today I’m grateful for:

Starting to feel normal again this evening.  Even early this afternoon I could still taste Friday night’s whiskey in my mouth.  This evening I seem to have my energy and motivation back after pushing through with a few things this afternoon.

The best thing about today was:

Sorting things out this afternoon for the Bennu 12” release and the upcoming MPC CD, downloading some comics, listening to some tunes and playing a bit of guitar.  I have to try and force myself into my room this week to play some more.  No book reading again this weekend sadly.  I really want to read more but seem more invested in YouTubing.  I’m going to turn off the video I’m about to watch and read instead.

Something I learned today?

Watching the Swans mini-match I found out that we lost by one point in a poor game.  Hopefully, it keeps us from being complacent.

I took this picture because I needed a shot to put on Bandcamp to try and sell this latest release from Bennu Is A Heron.

Dad No Dad – 29th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

It’s not your fault you couldn’t be
A good or bad father to me
Dying when I was only three
I never even knew your face

And son, although I never had
A chance to learn to be a dad
It never made me feel so bad
I’ll do my best for you

Submitted to Ovi Poetry Challenge – dad

The following is a letter from July 17, 2023, delivered today from the past

Dear FutureMe and FutureAmy,

Today is 17th July 2023 and Amy has just come back from Australia for one month and has whizzed around cleaning the house and getting it up to her standard of cleanliness.

Of course, she will have to clean it again when she comes back again in October!

Writing this today I feel quietly hopeful that Amy will be able to find herself again in Thailand. The onset of the pandemic at the end of 2019 really disrupted our plans to do some kind of business on our land or somewhere in Chiang Rai.

I think we all went a little stir-crazy being stuck at home so much, though for me I am quite comfortable sitting back and enjoying our little paradise.

I hope by the time this letter arrives that Amy hasn’t run off again to another part of the world in frustration. But whatever has happened I will support her. I have resolved to stay here and see out the lives of our cats and I am fine with that, whether Amy is here or not. Wherever she is in the world I can feel her with me. I want her to be happy.

When you receive this email it will be your birthday my little moo. I never know what to get you because I have already given you all that I have. Know that wherever you are, you have all my love.

Happy Birthday for another year, little Amy
Love you,
Shauny

Today I’m feeling:

A bit dusty after my first night of drinking this year.  I fell asleep in my clothes last night, half expecting to be dragged up again. At some point, I must’ve undressed as I was naked when I got up at 10am with a whiskey mouth.

Today I’m grateful for:

The staff at La Favola who took care of us tonight for Amy’s birthday dinner. We had a great time, overloading on their buffet, especially the oysters.

The best thing about today was:

Besides late morning coffee and dinner, the rest of the day was mostly spent either sleeping or reading in bed. 

The best thing was going out for a fancy dinner and having a good feeling of being together tonight.

Something I learned today?

The AFL usually quickly puts up videos of the last two minutes of very close games and I happened to see that there was one for the Swans game today which is a bad sign. Did we manage to scrape by or just lose? I’ll find out tomorrow.

More Ice Cream – 20th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Can you be persuaded away
By the carrot on the stick?
Caught in the thought of ice cream
And eating until you’re sick
– Surely you need a jumbo serve
– To teach you what you deserve

Submitted to FOWC with Fandango – persuade and RDP Monday – jumbo

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good again.  The morning has whizzed by thanks to all my students being incredibly well-behaved and attentive today.  I’m a little surprised!  I wish every day was like this.  I actually felt like I was teaching rather than attending.

Today I’m grateful for:

The kids I asked not to come and disrupt my afternoon class today.  I appreciated that though maybe my students didn’t understand so much but it got them more focused and we got enough done.

The best thing about today was:

Those early classes setting up the day for me so that I’m not so tired.  I’m perhaps also getting used to this schedule too.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy suddenly changed plans this morning as she didn’t sleep well but it was nothing that caused any real problem or made me change my plans too much.

Something I learned today?

It’s a possibility that Chad Warner could be lured from Sydney Swans to Freo, as he is from the West Coast originally.  He’s already touted as the best player in the competition.  He’s only 22 or 23 years old.  I hope he doesn’t leave though.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I sent encouraging messages to KanomBang and BB after they paid more attention in class and asked me for help.

I’ve also been sending Anchan encouragement every now and then.  She went to a speaking competition last weekend and was disappointed to come ninth.

I found iPhone, Fahmai and another girl practising dancing and they told me that there will be a competition next week so I wished them luck and hope that I can see them.