Stage left Enigmatically Entranced; entranced her audience “There she is!” The crowd’s breath held; rapturously Applauded and exited Stage right
Submitted to What’s Going On – A Cameo Appearance. Cameo is a seven-line syllable count, unrhymed poem invented by English poet Alice Spokes. It has 2-5-8-3-8-7-2 syllables per line, for a total of 35 syllables.
Today I’m feeling:
Tired and sick again, though not too terrible, just lacking energy and motivation. My throat is getting more sore and I’m full of medicines.
Today I’m grateful for:
Not having to do anything today, and that is pretty much what I did.
The best thing about today was:
I watched another five episodes of The Boys to finish off the first season. It was good but the comics were more fun.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
After coffee, I came home to watch the football and was hoping that the Swans could get their act together but they got trounced by Port and now look less likely to win anything else this year. Oh well.
Something I learned today?
I watched a video about dead hangs and how not to push them too much. I haven’t done it much recently and should get back to it.
Joy, belligerent and hypnotic Cast a shadow of charity Over the long promontory A fat man, roly-poly round
Abundance in a city of kindness A broad island for a little boy A fungal cloud, a phoenix A beautiful desiccation
Radiance rose from the river That molten river of fire Gratification of vengeance Narrows victory to defeat
Charity bestowed from wings Of fury fanning the skies Attendant to the goddess of love Love shall burn all
This poem was inspired by the story of Richard Feynman and a phrase taken from his story about three students/assistants that became known as the Three Graces. Researching the Three Graces led me back to Greek Mythology (hence the title and theme of the poem). The image of the phoenix rising is then tied back to the science of the nuclear age and the events of August 1945 in Japan. Nagasaki means long promontory and Hiroshima means broad island and also sometimes city of kindness. The bombs were called little boy and fat man. The phoenix rising highlights the rise of Asia since those events.
Pretty good, getting up at 8 am and soon out for coffee. Whilst at Utopia, I worked on some poetry which came out pretty well, I think.
Without any other real plans for the day, I got myself into my room in the morning and started adding more old 1998 and 2009 entries to the blog.
Revived with lunch, I got back in there and did more, all the while listening to music I’ve downloaded in the past 12 months or so and deciding to either keep or delete. Finally, an hour or so of guitar playing too.
Today I’m grateful for:
My former self for being smart enough to keep some of my old emails that remind me of times past. There is a lot of other stuff that is no longer accessible, though, unfortunately.
The best thing about today was:
Getting a poem highlighted on AllPoetry.com, which was nice to find this morning and generated some extra commenters. I’ve been happy with what I’ve been writing recently and it’s nice to get some positive feedback.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
This morning I also watched the mini-match of the Swans game and it was obvious within a couple of minutes that it wasn’t going to be a good day for us.
Still top of the table but with 4 losses in the last five games, our form is not inspiring confidence as we come towards the difficult end of the season.
Something I learned today?
Part of the problem with Australia’s high-priced housing is that not enough houses are being built for all the people who are either moving there or looking to move out of their family homes. I was surprised that there were just 170,000 homes built in one year. The lack of availability pushes up rents and house prices.
The average income required to buy a house now is 250K per year but the actual average income is only 120K.
It’s making me wonder where I might end up. Australia is still the most appealing place in the Western world, though. New Zealand may be an option at some point, I suppose.
I took this picture because this new flower in the garden stood out as I walked back into the house this morning.
The crab said to the albatross “Can you take me from here?” “Where do you wish to go?” Asked the albatross “Anywhere away from these sad rocks, To the skies!” The albatross said “Hop in” And opened wide his mouth Enjoying a difficult meal
A little better with my hip, though it kept me tossing and turning all night last night and so when it was light this morning, I just got up. It was only 7am but I felt better for moving.
I had to deal with an army of ants biting my feet in the kitchen as they were retreating inside from the rain overnight. Sadly for them, they are all dead now!
I started doing some weeding before heading off for coffee. I don’t know why. I just saw one and then kept going.
As I was about to get on the bike, the neighbour told me that they will concrete our drives today and so I can park over the road at Auntie’s, where there is lots of space. Everything should be finished soon, making our road much easier to traverse.
As our gardeners were due this morning, I asked Amy to cancel them but they insisted on coming. I guess they need money and know that we are reliable to pay them.
Today I’m grateful for:
The gardeners again. I’m glad that they came in the end as our grass is cut nice and short again making it less likely for snakes to travel through. From my quick inspection it seems that they didn’t manage to destroy any cactuses this time too.
The best thing about today was:
Tangmo coming to visit us a couple of times. After coffee in the morning and grabbing some Swenson’s ice cream, picking up Amy and coming home I’ve done a lot of TV watching and hip resting.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
The pain in my hip is out of my control and there’s not much I can do about it. I’m hoping a bit more recovery tonight, otherwise I’ll have to go and waste some time at the hospital.
Something I learned today?
The Swans won this week, smashing the Kangaroos by 79 points. Not a difficult opponent but good to get another win after the small loses over the last two weeks.
Review your acts, Good and bad.
I met Nong Kratae at Utopia this morning and she asked me if I would come and help her once a month, as her high school-aged students need more information about IELTS study.
I told her that I could come along one time and see what it is that I might be able to offer.
I took this picture because Piti was doing his best sexy pose this morning.
Wound tight, played precise A night fight, all that jazz Voodoo spell, doll will dance Deadside hell and razzmatazz Pagan sages, a ragtime roll Inner rages in shadow hours Pinprick pain, man divided Ridden insane by fiendish powers
Still a little dusty and vague. Predictably, last night I didn’t sleep well as indigestion bothered my stomach and the oysters bothered my guts.
A really vivid poop dream got me out of bed as the oysters decided to make their early exit and it was a struggle to get a good deep sleep after that.
Today I’m grateful for:
Starting to feel normal again this evening. Even early this afternoon I could still taste Friday night’s whiskey in my mouth. This evening I seem to have my energy and motivation back after pushing through with a few things this afternoon.
The best thing about today was:
Sorting things out this afternoon for the Bennu 12” release and the upcoming MPC CD, downloading some comics, listening to some tunes and playing a bit of guitar. I have to try and force myself into my room this week to play some more. No book reading again this weekend sadly. I really want to read more but seem more invested in YouTubing. I’m going to turn off the video I’m about to watch and read instead.
Something I learned today?
Watching the Swans mini-match I found out that we lost by one point in a poor game. Hopefully, it keeps us from being complacent.
The following is a letter from July 17, 2023, delivered today from the past
Dear FutureMe and FutureAmy,
Today is 17th July 2023 and Amy has just come back from Australia for one month and has whizzed around cleaning the house and getting it up to her standard of cleanliness.
Of course, she will have to clean it again when she comes back again in October!
Writing this today I feel quietly hopeful that Amy will be able to find herself again in Thailand. The onset of the pandemic at the end of 2019 really disrupted our plans to do some kind of business on our land or somewhere in Chiang Rai.
I think we all went a little stir-crazy being stuck at home so much, though for me I am quite comfortable sitting back and enjoying our little paradise.
I hope by the time this letter arrives that Amy hasn’t run off again to another part of the world in frustration. But whatever has happened I will support her. I have resolved to stay here and see out the lives of our cats and I am fine with that, whether Amy is here or not. Wherever she is in the world I can feel her with me. I want her to be happy.
When you receive this email it will be your birthday my little moo. I never know what to get you because I have already given you all that I have. Know that wherever you are, you have all my love.
Happy Birthday for another year, little Amy Love you, Shauny
Today I’m feeling:
A bit dusty after my first night of drinking this year. I fell asleep in my clothes last night, half expecting to be dragged up again. At some point, I must’ve undressed as I was naked when I got up at 10am with a whiskey mouth.
Today I’m grateful for:
The staff at La Favola who took care of us tonight for Amy’s birthday dinner. We had a great time, overloading on their buffet, especially the oysters.
The best thing about today was:
Besides late morning coffee and dinner, the rest of the day was mostly spent either sleeping or reading in bed.
The best thing was going out for a fancy dinner and having a good feeling of being together tonight.
Something I learned today?
The AFL usually quickly puts up videos of the last two minutes of very close games and I happened to see that there was one for the Swans game today which is a bad sign. Did we manage to scrape by or just lose? I’ll find out tomorrow.
Can you be persuaded away By the carrot on the stick? Caught in the thought of ice cream And eating until you’re sick – Surely you need a jumbo serve – To teach you what you deserve
Pretty good again. The morning has whizzed by thanks to all my students being incredibly well-behaved and attentive today. I’m a little surprised! I wish every day was like this. I actually felt like I was teaching rather than attending.
Today I’m grateful for:
The kids I asked not to come and disrupt my afternoon class today. I appreciated that though maybe my students didn’t understand so much but it got them more focused and we got enough done.
The best thing about today was:
Those early classes setting up the day for me so that I’m not so tired. I’m perhaps also getting used to this schedule too.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Amy suddenly changed plans this morning as she didn’t sleep well but it was nothing that caused any real problem or made me change my plans too much.
Something I learned today?
It’s a possibility that Chad Warner could be lured from Sydney Swans to Freo, as he is from the West Coast originally. He’s already touted as the best player in the competition. He’s only 22 or 23 years old. I hope he doesn’t leave though.
Review your acts, Good and bad.
I sent encouraging messages to KanomBang and BB after they paid more attention in class and asked me for help.
I’ve also been sending Anchan encouragement every now and then. She went to a speaking competition last weekend and was disappointed to come ninth.
I found iPhone, Fahmai and another girl practising dancing and they told me that there will be a competition next week so I wished them luck and hope that I can see them.
Pretty good considering that I was dead to the world until my alarm went off this morning. Managed some exercise and a 5-minute (what could possibly be described as a) meditation.
Today I’m grateful for:
Finding that Sydney Swans played yesterday against the Bulldogs and so I watched the Mini Match and happy to report that we pulled through for another win. The Swans are currently well clear at the top but there’s still a ways to go.
I’m still annoyed that I can’t watch the full matches, especially this year, as we’re doing so well!
The best thing about today was:
In my final class of the day with my grade 8s I have what you might call another ‘rogue’ student. She, Sugus, is a friend of Aida’s and has been coming to my class occasionally since last year but now she seems to come all the time.
She’s a quiet kid and doesn’t cause any problems for me but I told her that if she wants to stay then she has to do some work, to which she agreed.
Today’s class is an easy reading class and I asked Sugus to come and read for me and she did very well, better than some of my actual students!
So I talked with her some more about why she doesn’t go to her own class and if the teacher isn’t concerned about her. She couldn’t quite describe why she doesn’t go except that she feels bad when she does.
I’m a bit suspicious that something untoward might have happened but I didn’t push it.
Anyway, I told her that she was welcome to stay in my class and she thanked me and said that my class is fun for her. I was quite pleased about that.
It’s weird really. There’s no pressure on her to perform and there’s no pressure on me to teach her. With us both relaxed about it I think she will learn a lot!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
For my second class today, with the Hospitality grade 11s I suddenly found 12 extra students! Without telling me, and without anyone telling them why they have put two different programs together so I’m now teaching students in the Japanese program too. So much for my plans for this semester! I guess I’ll jag everything in somehow.
Something I learned today?
Chatting with David he told me that George complained to Nancy that he doesn’t want to teach the new Integrated Program to the grade 10s and so, magically, he no longer is. Now he only teaches grade 11 and 12. What a princess!
Last year he refused to teach grade 9 and now refuses grade 10. Maybe time is running out for him.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
This evening I’m still helping my grade 11 students with their presentation homework and replying to their messages.
Did you do something difficult or challenging today?
As I think about it, much of the day was challenging (as described above) but somehow I seemed to take it in my stride.
Tonaor took this picture because as she likes to do sometimes when she sees me she says ‘selfie!’ and so I hand her my phone.
Quiet and confused but more settled throughout the day.
Today I’m grateful for:
The end of the holidays!
As often happens I end up deleting lots of things that keep me updated with news from around the world. This time I’ve deleted a lot of subscriptions to reports from the USA or geopolitics that generally involves the USA. It’s sad and frustrating to watch the wild thrashes of a beast in its death throes so I’m putting out of my sight.
The best thing about today was:
I went out to get some sodas and dropped in to see if Baipad was back home now, which she was and I chatted with her for a few minutes.
She seemed ok and was glad to be back from her Grandmum’s though as soon as she was back her cat knocked her phone to the floor and broke it!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Yesterday’s roller coaster of emotions ended on a sour note, as even though Amy had eventually been happy and grateful and affectionate towards me I couldn’t shake the rest of the bad feelings out and when, as she often does, she drunkenly came to me for sex I calmly said that I wasn’t interested tonight and was annoyed at the fact this only usually happens when she is drunk. When I’m rebutted in my approaches at other times I will laugh it off and wait for another day.
To be approached when drunk feels insulting to me. I know I shouldn’t feel like this but it had been a long day for me and I was nowhere near in a loving mood.
And Amy took great umbrage at this and stormed off slamming doors and going to the other bedroom. I left it for a while and came and asked her back into our bedroom and cuddled her til we both slept.
Although there were no hostilities this morning Amy didn’t want to communicate and so I was as pleasant as I could be and left her to it. We continued the day quietly without talking further about what happened in particular. I feel OK but could also feel better.
Something I learned today?
Sydney Swans are top of the table in the AFL after beating GWS and Geelong losing to Melbourne. It’s a bit of a surprise, to be honest. The media rarely focus much on the Swans as they have just been a consistent team without flash or bravado and they (the media) focuses on the Melbourne teams for gossip and rivalry.
And Ipswich Town have won their last game of the season to make it back into the Premier League next year. Wow!
And then double wow, stumbling across a video podcast of interviews with Ipswich legends from my youth. I watched one episode today with George Burley. Amazing.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Some things are indefensible We all make mistakes The idea is to learn and grow No matter what it takes
When genocide repeats itself What was the fight for? When the persecuted rain down Their own hypocritical war
When destruction becomes immoral What must a soldier do? Take a big bite of courage To get the message through
Propaganda no longer hides The truth of all this killing To turn a buck for a belief In a society no longer willing
Today I’m feeling:
Good, after forcing myself up and to exercise. I really wanted to sleep more so I’m happy with myself and my motivation.
Today I’m grateful for:
The local hospital and Dr Poom, my medicine dispenser. I was able to get straight in today with barely 5 minutes wait, despite it being very busy. I also asked about information for my students who are struggling and what to recommend them if and when they go to the hospital.
It occurred to me today that after Baipad tried to overdose on paracetamol all the hospital were concerned about was her kidney health. It seems like maybe no one even asked her why she did it!
Anyway, the info from Dr Poom was useful as they have a child psychiatrist there and psychotherapists too.
The best thing about today was:
My energy levels being great for most of the day due to that morning exercise. I felt energetic and inspired through all of the day and though I wasn’t doing much strenuous work since the morning I just kept going from one thing to another.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
As mentioned a couple of weeks ago there has been a change to access the full replay of the AFL matches online and whilst I was able to access it with a VPN last time, today it didn’t work and I was getting wound up by it while trying to figure out a way around it. Eventually I just had to resign myself to watching the 15 minute mini-match highlights. Disappointing but all I can do is shout at the clouds.
Something I learned today?
I learned that it is costing the USA 200 million dollars an hour to keep the genocide rolling in Palestine. Or as the USA likes to call it, defending Israel.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I sent pep messages to Anchan and Baipad this morning. I also chatted a little with my other students, Freya, Winter and Wipping.
I beeped at the annoying BMW in front of me that failed to move at the traffic lights, meaning that we all missed it and couldn’t go anywhere. I was frustrated for a minute.
Did you do something difficult or challenging today?
I picked up the guitar again today and it sucked! But I persevered even whilst continuing to suck. I need to change the strings too. They sound dull – much like my playing! Never mind. I won’t be deterred.
I took this picture because this was the view from our dinner table on Saturday, looking over the Mae Khong to Laos.
Pretty good even though I slept badly due to aching shoulders. I should probably get them checked out as it’s been painful for about six months already.
I got up early so that I could watch the Swans game this morning.
I need to book flights to Bangkok to meet up with Arwith in early May, order a filter for our air purifier and will take Baipad and Butter to practice riding the motorbike again.
In amongst all that I’ll do all the things I usually do too; reading, writing, thinking and planning.
Today I’m grateful for:
My alarm getting me up and into action this morning. I could easily have slept another three hours but glad that I gave myself that extra time to do things.
The best thing about today was:
It’s been a pretty good day all round. It was 41 degrees and the house was like an oven so I spent most of my time in aircon.
I didn’t read or play guitar today but did clear up a backlog of emails.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
When I got back from coffee I prepared everything to watch the AFL but it wasn’t working, which was unusual. I saw one error about location so I downloaded a free VPN and tried some different locations. None of those worked either but they also didn’t have the option to set the server to Australia.
I checked if the Highlights and Mini Matches still worked and they were fine. But even last week’s full match replays were no longer available.
I searched online to see if there might be some information about this and ended up posting on Reddit. Whilst waiting for any response I found another VPN that had an Australian server and finally, I was able to watch the game (which was an unconvincing win).
It looks like someone else had the same problem too so I guess I need to figure out a VPN to watch full games in future. The one I used, TunnelBear, has a 2G data limit and I’m not sure if that is daily, weekly or monthly. I really don’t want to have to pay for a VPN just to watch one match a week.
Something I learned today?
Butter’s mum came and introduced herself to me and when we got back from riding I also met his dad and sister, Cookie! Great names!
Cookie will start grade 7 at my school next month though I won’t be teaching her.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
More encouragement for Butter and Baipad with motorbike riding.
Butter has pretty much got it already and Baipad improved a little more today too. I think that gave her a mini confidence boost.
I can see from her actions that whatever bullying she suffered when she was younger has really knocked her self-confidence. She is still vulnerable to other people who could easily bully and manipulate her.
I also sent another 100 baht to Anchan.
When was the last time I tried something new?
Although I can’t pinpoint it I believe that I try something new every day. The journey through our minutes is diverted off course consistently. Even the Trumans Show fell apart eventually and Groundhog Day was never actually the same.
But something deliberately new? So something interesting? Not just a new restaurant, a new book, a new poem, a new song to listen to?
How about a new country, a new house, a new job, a new hobby?
Read anything here, there is nothing new and something new on every page.
Write about a time when you laughed uncontrollably.
Back in 1989 (I think) I was thrilled to be outside of England for the first time in my life and playing shows with my friends in Belgium and Holland. I soon bonded with our Dutch host Mark and we would drink, get high and laugh a lot much like any other early twenty-year-olds would.
At this one of our shows, which was an amazingly fun night where Mike, from the New York band Shaved Pigs (who had hung on a bit longer after their tour had finished the week previous) joined us on saxophone for our epic jam tune, there was a radio interview at the end of the evening.
Thoroughly happy and drunk, Mark, who was the interviewer, asked me to recite a couple of poems that I had written that he had seen before.
I think I read The Day The Apples Turned To Poison but hassled for more I was requested to read She Lost Her Virginity To A Worm. The anticipation in the room for this short poem was too much and I couldn’t even get to the end of it as Mark and I were in fits of giggles.
A fascinating radio listen? I doubt very much!
I took this picture because His Majesty was looking regal, watching over the dining room this morning. I’m so glad that he is feeling better this week.
1994ever 