Tag: Amy

One Thing – 5th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

It’s all you have, there’s nothing else
All you held are old dusty dreams
It’s the time you are alive, this one thing
The only possession that is what it seems

Every moment wasted on the dramas of others subtracts from your strength.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and carefree despite still having to organise things for my students for tomorrow’s classes.
Today I’m grateful for:
The rental car company and for being able to drive around Phuket at leisure and without worry.
The best thing about today was:
Today has been steadily great. Right now we’re in the Hilton restaurant at the beach with free-flow alcohol. Good for Amy! This morning we had delicious brunch at another beach, along with Aing, after dropping Fern and Harper at the airport. Everything went super smoothly timing-wise and Amy and I drove back by the scenic beaches route with a quick circuit of Patong just as a reminder of being there 10 years ago. The lovely hotel we stayed at that time has been abandoned since, probably due to the pandemic, but there were lots of new ones and many foreign tourists around as expected. After dropping Amy back at Pim’s I went off book shopping and picked up one book I was looking for and another three by Studs Turkel, who I’ve never heard of, but was fascinated by the name and an approval from Kurt Vonnegot on the back cover of one. Awesome, even with the heavy rain.
Something I learned today?
According to surveys, Chiang Rai is the drunkest province in Thailand. Not sure how this was measured and it must be pretty serious as everywhere in Thailand loves a drink.
What are some of the challenges you face?
My biggest challenges at the moment probably revolve around health. I need to lose a little weight again and build up some stamina but seem to be suffering a little from what may be long covid. I get breathless and exhausted easily. I have aching hips and a painful neck, weak arms with painful elbows. I should focus a little bit of extra effort on maintenance in the next few months.

I took this picture because it was good timing for us to be dropping Fern to the airport near where Aing lives and Aing has a day off today so we could treat her to lunch. The food was great and the beach was good too.

Ferris Wheel – 3rd December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Smooth Tim sells sofas – modular
And his voice has become so popular
Now the king of Dumbdom City
His voice has never been so pretty
Hiding confidence he found lacking
Advertising dollars are his backing
A billion books sold with nothing to say
Four hours of reading is his work today
On this wheel but no longer grinding
Empowering words are his finding
Pulled up from bootstraps and collar
Another four-hour day, another dollar

Inspired by listening to a Soaring Twenties podcast where Tim Ferriss was being dumped on, perhaps rightly, perhaps unfairly. Hot takes provide interest.

A wise man will make more opportunities than he finds.

Francis Bacon

Today I’m feeling:
Happy, and relaxed though a little tired
Today I’m grateful for:
All the people that made it possible for Amy and me to fly to Phuket today. If you think about it, there are a lot of people involved in making this happen, which we now take so much for granted.
The best thing about today was:
Swimming in Pim’s pool and looking up at the palms.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
A drunken Amy screaming in the car as I drove to the restaurant for dinner. I enjoyed it as much as I could as it makes me happy to see her happy.
List three goals for this month.

  1. Try to have some money left by the end of the month.
  2. Start using Ableton again and compose some music.
  3. Not lose my temper with my students.

4th Jan 2023 – 1. Fail 2. Fail 3. Success

I took this picture because we’re staying at Pim’s new rental house in Phuket and this is the pool which took me a few minutes after arriving to jump into. Good backstroke for my shoulders but exhausted afterwards.

Dig In – 27th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The roots have grown
The longer you stay
The harder it is to leave

Now time has shown
That along the way
You’ve found what you believe

The comfort of the rich depends upon an abundant supply of the poor.

Voltaire

Today I’m feeling:
Relaxed and lazy
Today I’m grateful for:
The fisherman who caught the prawns I ate, somewhere far away. Shipped them to shore, then the factory workers who prepared them and packaged them and the drivers who delivered them.
The best thing about today was:
Enjoying ice cream and snacks after a weed gummy. It’s hard to stop eating!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I could tell Amy was getting a little irritable around lunch time so I just laughed and joked a little and not getting sucked into an argument over nothing. She quickly lightened up and everything was normal again. These situations can quickly go out of control when I don’t handle them well.
In what ways have you observed balance in nature or in the universe?
Looking at mountains, staring at the sea. I see balance in nature when there are no humans around and I become a ghost, an observer but only as a memory. Looking up at the stars and the moon, being grateful for this very specific role I have been given.

I took this picture because Jet made this nice drawing of me and my nice shirt! This picture is a throwback to a couple of weeks ago. No pictures again today!

Til The End – 23rd November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Make sure to watch til the end
This video needs the stats
Nothing happens at that point
As you can see within the chats

But make sure to watch til the end
Cos this video needs to go viral
A dollar for every ad served
Within this ever-downward spiral

Make sure to watch til the end
If you really want to laugh
Forget about the time you’ve wasted
Cutting your life in half

Make sure to watch til the end
Scroll and pause, pause and scroll
You’re the product in this game
And the devil wants your soul

So make sure you watch til the end…

The foundations of a free country is that your freedom to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.

Ryan Holiday

Today I’m feeling:
Reasonably happy.
Today I’m grateful for:
The old auntie at the market that made an old-style Thai dessert that is hard to come across. It’s a little like Japanese mochi, made with sticky rice and flour and other things I don’t recognise.
The best thing about today was:
Explaining some work to a couple of students and seeing the joy of understanding on their faces when it clicked for them. Small steps. Interested students are a teacher’s pleasure. Uninterested students are impossible to get through to and those moments of understanding are far fewer with them. So even a poorer student that shows interest is preferred.
Daily thought
Who is someone living that you admire?
I’ve been thinking about this off and on all day and as was commented on where I found this question, it is much easier to come up with a person that is dead. Why is that? A finished story perhaps. A life that no longer can be spoiled… I admire many of my musician friends, just for their abilities to create music that sparks me. This can apply to artists I don’t know too but the connection feels vaguer these days. This admiration is not necessarily for who these people are but for things they created, though there is a strong connection in the qualities of patience and persistence amongst other things. If I have admiration for who a person is then that would be Amy. She has her ups and downs as much as anyone but in general, is a happy person whose positivity is seen by most and I’m sure has helped guide her through life with good results. I admire her attitude. I’m not like that, not like her in that way. I wish I could be but I just can’t. It’s one of the reasons I want to be with her though. She’s a counterbalance for me.
What’s your best advice for teenagers?
The best advice is what I have learned through reading about Stoicism and understanding the dichotomy of control. As I am teaching teenagers at the moment this often comes up for them in learning about dealing with relationships and situations. It is always something I have to remind myself about every day though. I think I’ll make that a daily question for myself from tomorrow.

I took this picture because this is typical of my students in class. Today I laughed with them but actually, I feel disappointed for them. The environment is just not conducive to learning.

Rose-Tinted Tears – 21st November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Not understanding consequences
The future impossibly vast
Fire the only guide
With no lesson from the past
Naivety is nature
For kitten and the pup
A world set in wonder
To drink from this cup
Bitter-tasting tears
Wiped from cheeks so red
Whispered-coated rumours
Of words perhaps not said
Blind lead blind in battles
Swords laid to the heart
Voices deepen in anguish
As the youth set to depart
Wisdom-thickened skin
Hardened by the aches
Practised and repeated
Then learned from those mistakes
Where did they go
Those sadder lonely days?
Reminders of a time
Enjoyed in so many ways.

The truth I believe is that silence – like darkness – is a little unnerving but unlike darkness, the apprehension comes not from the fact that it conceals but in that it reveals.

Thomas J Bevan

Today I’m feeling:
Exhausted, a little happy but a little down.
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy being back in the kitchen and cooking up a storm. Before we got home we went shopping and found some vegan pork belly cubes and Amy cooked them and they were delicious.
The best thing about today was:
Chilling at House after a reasonable first-thing morning class. The kids were fairly well-behaved and most got their work done. I got a few things done whilst drinking coffee and enjoyed relaxing.
What book are you reading right now?
Quite a few different ones but the main one is 100 Selected Stories by Anton Chekov. Only just started yesterday but the first two stories were great.

I took this picture because everyone loves a chilled dopey dog. Tokyo can get pretty bitey but I’ve learned to keep her happy and she’s often found like this.

Someone Else – 20th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Confident and handsome
A mirror, to make smiles
Smart enough to understand
Dumb enough to be ignorant
Wanting for nothing
Always in control
The best of health
Someone else

How much pain have cost the evils which have never happened!

Thomas Jefferson

Today I’m feeling:
Tired but happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Little Amy being her usual happy self. Her own energy rubs off on me and pushes me even though I’m tired. I need it. I need to move my body despite everything inside me telling me not to.
The best thing about today was:
Cleaning, moving, cutting, planting things in the garden with Amy and enjoying the fruits of our labour.
Does your family make any special dishes for the holidays?
My family? Who is that these days? Amy will make special dishes but doesn’t need a holiday to do that. This app like many things one might come across on the Internet is US-centric and is referring to Thanksgiving but this annoys me really. Most of the world does not live in the US or celebrate Thanksgiving or the genocide of indigenous populations. I felt the same in Australia when people always talked about the seasons not thinking that half the world doesn’t follow the same seasons! So, in general, in short, I guess my answer is no. With a cherry on top.

I took this picture because my student Anchan took my phone and replaced my Gloomy wallpaper with her selfies so I had to find some new Gloomy wallpaper images. I love Gloomy, and Anchan too!

They Shook Hands – 14th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Smiling for the camera
Deceptive poker plays
Air pushed in translation
No thunder today

Arm wrestle the future
Knives behind backs
Until advantage found
In what the other lacks

Back to the big oak table
For diplomatic fire
Promises made and broken
As new demands require

All the hands now shaken
To sighs of relief
Yet rendered in denial
And insincere belief

31st Mar 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt

I shall vomit back onto my contemporaries the disgust they inspire in me…

Gustav Flaubert

Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good though my students were very raucous today.
Today I’m grateful for:
The guy at the food stall who gave me a sesame-covered glutinous rice ball to try as I went out after class with the kids to get snacks.
The best thing about today was:
Getting the ironing done before Amy is back. I don’t want her to feel that she has to iron my shirts. Time went quick enough as I watched videos whilst doing them.
Daily thought
An example of good coming from a bad experience.
When going through the bad experience you feel as if nothing good could ever come out of that sick feeling. It is only on reflection that growth is recognised. Bad experiences include getting dumped and cheated on, being treated with contempt by bosses, and being made a scapegoat. To think about recent times would be how my first two teaching experiences dealing with the administrative system totally sucked but out of that I ended up where I am now where I am much happier.
Do you have a life partner?
Oh yes indeed. My lovely little Amy.

I took this picture because this is what happens when the kids take my phone to take pictures with. Bless them.

The Myths We Made – 11th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

So much for the myths we made
Throwing rocks at the running police
Looking out from the tenth-floor flat
And dreaming of release

The tunes were busting on the stereo
And cigarette smoke filled the room
Bass was shaking the floor below
They were banging with a broom

Nothing to do and nowhere to go
We made fists and painted shirts
Promised ourselves we’d never stop
No matter how much it hurts

Time went on and the myths grew large
So much, they hung around our necks
Weighed down with hypocrisy
Until the truth could no longer flex

The tragedy of being human is that even when we are doing our best to be kind and compassionate, sometimes we still hurt and get hurt by others. In moments like this, I believe that compassion becomes a matter of faith: Choosing to believe in our own innate goodness, even when others refuse to see it; and choosing to believe in the goodness of others, even when they are refusing to show it.

Kai Cheng Thom

Today I’m feeling:
Relaxed and happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Being able to accompany Amy via video call as she makes her drunken way from the city to her home in the early hours.
The best thing about today was:
Talking to Jochen for a two-and-a-half-hour catch-up on things. It felt very comfortable and natural even though we haven’t talked except via messages for more than a year. We have a common understanding born from our musical backgrounds despite having variations in taste. We get it. Jochen is one of my tribe.
Daily thought
Do you remember a time you let something external bother you too much?
Yes, too many times, unfortunately. Sometimes the situation feels like it can’t be escaped due to financial responsibility and risk for example quitting a job to get away from a shitty manager. In cases like that, it feels like having no control and I couldn’t be brave enough to get away. Perhaps ego also plays a part and wanting to be right to the detriment of my own health. Looking back it is easier to see that I could have understood the situation better and concentrated on the things that I could control rather than get upset about the things I couldn’t. Just thinking about some of those situations now though still winds me up so I wonder if I could behave better if it happened again. I’m weak and in denial. Maybe one day I’ll get it!
Write a thank you letter to someone you love.
Well, I didn’t do this specifically but I did get a burst of energy today writing emails about vinyl production and south-east Asian touring possibilities. Talking with Jochen for a couple of hours sort of fills this criterion too. I don’t consider myself to have many good friends but I love those that I do have and that includes Jochen. He’s one of the good ones.

I took this picture because I was surprised to see this little fella just sitting here camouflaged in the early evening. Better than finding them dried up under the sofa!

Reaching The End Of The Internet – 31st October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

We all live in a trivia submarine
Deeper into holes full of rabbits
From the Can I Haz Cheeseburger? meme
To fountains and mountains of shitty reddits
Diving through dark webs of extreme
Impossible to break these sad habits
Nothing is said but it may seem
As if everyone has already said it

That is what everyone’s work should be – a confession, a baring of your soul, your faults, those things you simply cannot or will not understand or accept. You stumble forward, confused, and you share. If you’re lucky, you learn something.

Arthur Miller

Today I’m feeling:
Half motivated half exhausted.
Today I’m grateful for:
There being little to do at school today so I spent some time drinking coffee and updating my blog. Time flew by and I could’ve stayed for longer but ended up coming home. It’s been more than a month since I spent a whole day at school!
The best thing about today was:
Riding my bike up to the post office and sending a package to Hayden with the printout from my 1979 blog entries. Picking up some fried rice on the way back and enjoying a laid-back afternoon reading, watching YouTube and playing the guitar.
What challenged you today?
Forcing myself to follow the mantra I wrote yesterday, to not be lazy and to do my best usual five minutes exercise. Then to not push myself further and go too hard too quickly. I have to remember that I built up to the stamina I had before and can’t just go straight back into it. With Amy coming soon I need to get this rolling again.

I took this picture because these little cartoons caught my attention as I was reading some blog and I think I can use them with my students in some way.

Spread The Word – 27th October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

A rusty soul needs constant scrubbing
Lifting hands up towards the sun
Don’t turn around a-snubbing
For a journey just begun
Spread the word when required
Now’s the time to teach
Everyone needs to be inspired
For the heights to which we reach

We are drowning in information, while starving for wisdom.

E.O. Wilson

Today I’m feeling:
Dizzy and tired. Maybe getting the flu…
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy’s mum and dad for paying for my birthday lunch today. I was ravenous and enjoyed a bowl of nachos. Simple but effective.
The best thing about today was:
Contacting a local tattoo shop and planning some Cardiacs related tattoos. I’ve seen the work from the studio on Art and Boss at Utopia and it’s pretty good.
If you can pick any job in the world, what would it be?
I’d be interested in almost any job so long as there was no pressure. Imagine any job and being given a six-month training period with no expectations and imagine this was for any job. People could just keep trying what they wanted and be able to find the best thing for them at that time. I’d learn about plants and growing or be some kind of operator at CERN. Maybe a train driver, car dealer or painter. Any job where you can feel respected and worthwhile would be good.

I took this picture because this is the birthday cake Amy got made for me for today! It looks great and dad made a joke about cutting through the neck.