Tag: anticipation

Courage – 13th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 17 Comments

Alone in the dark, deeply breathing

The sigh became a laugh
A call for arms

Wrapped warmly, waiting
Gathering courage
Anticipating that first kiss

A cherita shared with Shay’s Word Garden – breathing, laugh, kiss.
27th Nov 2025 – Shared with What’s Going On – courage

Today I’m feeling:

Almost out of energy.  I slept well, and the alarm shocked me awake for once this week.  Pushing through, though.  Only one more day left of the work week after today.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Jern telling her students that the last class of the day finishes at 4.30 and if you want to leave earlier you have to get everything done.  Today, the kids were on the ball,l and we were all able to get out by about 4 pm.

Nomsen’s ‘family emergency’ yesterday turned out to be a birthday party with some of her older friends.  Not impressed, and Kru Jern agreed, but I let it slide.

The best thing about today was:

The fish stall at the street market was there today, thankfully, so I’m full up on fish, rice and chilli.

Something I learned today?

Little Namwan, the little tom boy student that was scared of me for about 18 months because I physically picked her up near the bathrooms and deposited her back in class 4 years ago now suddenly appeared in my afternoon class (after not turning up for my class in the morning that she was supposed to be at).

When I asked her what she was doing there, she just pointed to Ploy (whose birthday it was today).  Knowing Namwan, she is obviously crushing on her, as she did with Nicha last year.  It’s interesting to watch.

Namwan is 4 years older but seems to lack a lot of confidence compared with her peers, so perhaps she feels on a more even playing ground with the younger students.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

My driving was a bit less rushed both this morning and evening.

Amy and I tried to fix up the bird nest after Amy did some ant extermination around the plant where it is.  She could see ants getting to the nest and maybe annoying the chicks.  Doing that kinda disturbed the nest, though, which is kinda precariously balanced between two stems.

Feathers forming. Not much room for mum now.

Headstones – 25th July 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Staring away at the whispered words
The smile no longer inspires
Ghostly here amongst the sleeping
Letting go of what love requires

The end of the story, said goodbye
Seven minutes to break a heart
The one that promised themselves so much
Must find the joy of a new start

Today I’m feeling:

I slept in the air-conned bedroom with Amy last night but still didn’t sleep that well, waking up with aching hips or feeling too cold! Anyway, it was better than feeling hot and Tigger had also sprayed in our bedroom and it was still smelly in there. 

My first class went well and has put me in a good mood as I sit here drinking coffee preparing for my next class in four hours and by preparing I mean doing something else besides thinking about teaching!

Today I’m grateful for:

My new pants that I bought yesterday and felt good wearing today. I tried the other pair I bought but even though they are the same maker and have the same label for waist size are about two sizes too small for me. No refunds. It’s a shame but I should’ve tried them on rather than trusting that they would be the same. My mistake.

The best thing about today was:

Firstly, having my last class, the troublesome rebellious lot, going well again and being a lot of fun this time, I’m glad that I made the change of style of teaching with them and whilst I don’t feel like I’m teaching them much at least they are practising their reading, writing and speaking skills to some degree.

Then, after school, Nong Na and Amy were waiting for me and we went off to Big C to get pizza and ice cream. It was good to see Na again, she has just started at the university in the Aviation faculty and I can already hear her improved confidence in listening and speaking since I last met her when she was in high school.

She is a quiet girl, never travelled far but is a good student and somehow Amy lit a fire under her and she has shown a determination to improve her English by herself. We are quite proud that she has come so far. She had never been to the Pizza Company store or to the ice cream shop so it was quite a thrill for her and it was our treat.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

It’s ten pm and I’m in bed, ran out of time to play guitar today which I kinda look forward to even though some days I sit down to play and get frustrated after five minutes of trying. Tomorrow evening I should have enough free time though as Amy will go out so I await that with anticipation. Thursday will not be free but Friday is the start of six days off so I’ll get some practice time in then.

Something I learned today?

I’m in the middle of a questionnaire to discover my style of kindness at work but my eyes are drooping and Amy is already asleep on my shoulder so I will have to learn that tomorrow. I learned other things today for sure but what were they….?

How do I cope with stress and adversity?

By not inviting it into my head so often. When it does it always upsets me that I let it get the better of me. 

I took this picture a couple of weeks ago because these two-tone clouds looked amazing on the horizon. Unfortunately, it didn’t translate as well into a picture on my phone but as I didn’t find the time or opportunity to take a picture today then this will have to do. Tomorrow – must try harder!

Together We Rise – 9th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 3 Comments

Once again, I was told I was free
That I could be whatever I wanted to be
So I told of the things inside my head
That had filled me full of existential dread

Then I found that so many people didn’t agree
I was called out and threatened constantly
I never thought just because of words I said
Made people so upset they’d want me dead

I realised freedom does not mean free
What’s freedom to you is not so for me
A common line must be towed instead
If you wish to lie in a settled bed

But is it possible for us to agree
That opposition is the end of you and me
We don’t need to succumb to lies we’re fed
Together we can travel the road ahead

2nd Jun 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt

Today I’m feeling:

Productive if only for household chores. Not sure I’ll be able to stay awake this afternoon.

Today I’m grateful for:

An afternoon cappuccino to keep me awake through the day but hopefully not so much that I can’t sleep tonight. I went out to Daytripper to enjoy it and watch the Kishore Mahbubani online course videos about US-China relations.

The best thing about today was:

A sense of achievement from sweeping up leaves, cutting back some climbing vines, preparing for cleaning off the roof, washing bedclothes, cleaning Kim’s room and getting everything ready for her to spend her nights in here again. I enjoyed doing it all.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’m here in Kim’s room writing this and I can see that the fuckin’ ants are out of control. I wonder if this is why the doesn’t like to sit directly on the floor. I sprayed ant killer in one corner of the room where I could see them coming and going but there must be many different colonies here all vying for their pieces of territory and the pull of Kim’s food bowl.

Kim is sitting watching me and wondering what the hell is going on.

Something I learned today?

The US voted no at the UN to make food a human right. They voted no to the Convention of Rights for Persons with Disabilities. No to the Convention on the Rights of the Child and against the resolution ‘combatting Nazism and contemporary forms of racism.’ The US sure likes to be different.

What emotion am I feeling right now?

Lethargy as my body winds down from the activities of the day. My mind though is still busy but that will soon wind down too. I also have a feeling of anticipation looking forward to jumping into bed with fresh clean sheets. My body is already experiencing the sensation, I’m looking forward to it that much.

I took this picture because new sheets, new sleeps. Almost summer.