Child, let me take you by the hand Angel, let me walk you home* The future, waiting to be planned You don’t need to walk alone
The coming is with each step Sun rising over dusty hills The past taught not to forget The truth each lesson instils
Praise each day’s hidden delight Adhere to the wisdom of the word Now let the sunset each night Angel, your prayers have been heard
*paraphrasing Unrest’s ‘Angel, I Will Walk You Home’. It could be argued that the first line paraphrases Ralph McTell’s Streets of London too. Title is a line from Gallucci’s ‘You-Wrecker’. Submitted to No Theme Thursday
Today I’m feeling:
Tired and dizzy because of an evening coffee and then many trips to the bathroom during the night along with Cap wanting to be let in and out of the bedroom a couple of times. Hopefully I don’t sleep in the cinema this afternoon!
Today I’m grateful for:
Going out to see a movie for a change. I’m grateful that even here in North Thailand I’m not far away from a movie theatre that shows movies in English.
The best thing about today was:
Nothing stands out today in particular. Everything has been pretty good.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I was expecting to leave at around 2pm today but Amy was hungry and said we will leave at 12. Well, ok then.
My yearly subscription renewal for Quizizz was automatically deducted today which took out a much-needed 800 baht from my account.
Not much I can do about that as I need the subscription so that I can continue teaching with this tool next semester.
I am grateful that they didn’t put the price up which is what normally happens.
Something I learned today?
Okinawa used to be called Ryukyu up until the 1870s and was a tributary state to China before Japan invaded on a murderous conquest.
What made me laugh out loud today?
I don’t tend to laugh out loud much these days unless I’m playing with my students at school – they certainly make me laugh a lot. In day-to-day life though I am…subdued…. Is that the correct word?
I like to think that I am more emotionally stable these days, as I’ve mentioned before, and not so affected by the ups and downs of my mood.
In today’s thoughts about the best thing about today, the whole day has been pleasant and relaxing without any real highlights and definitely no lows. This is preferable for me these days.
Perhaps I do need to laugh more (outside of school) and be a bit more playful, maybe.
Sarah took this picture on Thursday because I wanted a photo with Apple, Baipad and Jan to remember them and Iphone snuck in on the right too.
In grobblegrinch not merry met A whistlewomp paced upset Eyes colder than the darkest coal A ghosting galloped across my soul – The frugglefrau awaits beneath – The bridge, baring broken teeth The flutterflumps flew in fright As tolling bells queried the night Clearly here the foxes gather To feast on human gristleslather
A little flat. Summer has kicked in seemingly overnight and there are no more cool nights, at least not indoors. With the tail end of this flu, it has left me a little tired (though not sleepy) and easily affected by other’s moods or actions.
Today I’m grateful for:
A weed shop open in our little village! This evening Amy wanted to go and get some medicine and as we were riding home there was suddenly the smell of weed. Amy wanted to stop and bought a brownie in the hope that it will aid her to sleep better tonight.
The best thing about today was:
Getting through more than half of my grading for this semester and doing a lot of it during class time after setting some work and letting the students get on with it. It’s not even due yet but I want to get it done.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I forgot my medicine this morning so have been a little bit dizzy all day. Missing one day doesn’t affect me in that I will be depressed but the dizziness can be disorienting, otherwise I’m not thinking about the fact that I’ve missed it.
Something I learned today?
I bumped into my struggling student on the way to another class and they were on their iPad so I sarcastically asked if they were playing games or studying but they were actually live streaming. Live streaming whilst studying – and getting paid for it too! Sometimes 2000 baht they said! I waved to their followers and went off to class.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I followed up on the student who was struggling yesterday and they seem a bit better today. I gave some more tips and things to think about.
I also gave Baipad some more advice on using her brain more and trying to be more sociable. She reminds me of myself at times, much like all my students.
Imagine that, all my students are little pieces of me, running around as a reminder of what I was like! Is this a game? A fantastic AI simulation?
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 22. Don’t Blame People. What’s the point? Do you want to punish them? You don’t do that to people. Also, don’t blame yourself—you’re only human.
I’ve gotten better at this over the years. I would switch between blaming others and blaming myself. There are no winners in that thinking!
I took this picture on Saturday at the housewarming in the rice fields. No pictures today.
Been through all my mp3s Got them into folders Making them easier to find Tagged with genre holders Downloaded semi-legally Some, decades ago Now they are all mine Apparently so
Now I have cloud storage Folders I can share 7 million songs Are waiting for you there Music, the great healer In any shape or form From drum to vinyl to CD And now digital the norm!
Been through all my vinyl got them into plastic sleeves protection from the dust and grime that passing time it leaves Cathartic, it was wholesome remembering the time when I purchased each and brought them home when they were all then mine
And now I have a flight case with a selection waiting there to play on my turntable and with some others share Music, the great healer it is a remedy to cure or at very least bring respite as its purpose is so pure
A little better this morning. I started feeling a little better last night but crashed out early deliriously in and out of consciousness hearing the duff duff of the DJ and Amy’s screams. Amy was the last one standing, as usual, dancing on her own as everyone else retired and left.
Today I’m grateful for:
Aing and Now, who have been borrowing our bike and car but put petrol in them and got the front tyre of the bike replaced when it went flat last night.
The best thing about today was:
Reading more of this book about the Rise and Fall of the British Empire, this time about the way the British dealt with China from 1800 onwards.
I’ve read about this history before and it still makes me upset. I kind of felt smug whilst reading it this time though, knowing how the UK is fairing in the world these days compared to China.
Something I learned today?
In Vietnam, for many drunk drivers, it’s cheaper to abandon the bike than to pay the fine. Now the police are wondering what to do with them all…
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I helped Baipad with work and motivation for about an hour and a half this morning and I think she carried on working after I left and hopefully finished them all.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 21. Don’t Take Yourself So Seriously. Yeah, yeah, you’re an individual, and people have to take you seriously, I get it. But at the end of the day, we’re all a bunch of ants trying to chase the same things. Lighten up.
I don’t take myself too seriously though I do take what I do seriously.
People say I am serious but I think that it is just that I am not easily amused by many people, not adults.
It’s hard to be serious surrounded by naughty 13-year-olds much of the day and whilst it’s still easy to fall down to their level I hope I at least pull them up a little bit to mine.
I don’t mind being a clown or a fool for the sake of the kids. It makes me laugh to think of adults looking down on me for clowning around.
Under the weather again. Last night I could feel a slight tickle and ache in my throat as I was about to sleep.
I slept well though not enough and my alarm woke me up with a start to which I succumbed to another 30 minutes of snoozing, skipping exercise. When I got up I could feel the oncoming sore throat, confirmed by blood in my nose.
My mood was down a little too but it’s Friday so let’s go and get it done.
Today I’m grateful for:
Discovering that there is a holiday on Monday. Yippee!
The best thing about today was:
A chilled vibe at school (see below) and spending about five hours at House, reading, lesson planning, blogging and writing. What a job!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
At the morning flag ceremony, I noticed that my grade 7 classes were less than half in attendance and discovered that they were attending some meeting about a field trip. OK….
When it came to class time there were only about ten students and they told me the rest were still in the meeting.
I went to find Kru Karn, their homeroom teacher who didn’t know anything about where they were. I mentioned a field trip and she said ‘oh yes, there’s about 6 students going.’ I asked when it was and she thought that it was in the holiday. ‘Hmm’, I said, ‘that’s weird because there are more than 6 students missing from the class?’
She came to my class and talked with one of the students and was surprised to find out herself that many of the student’s parents skipped the process of advising her about their children going on the trip and, more importantly, the trip starts on Monday and is for one week!
The communication here is so crazy – no one knows what’s going on.
I said ‘Well, I guess that’s it for teaching these kids this semester.’ Kru Karn agreed and advised to start doing their grading files. And it leaves me with another day with no classes again already.
Something I learned today?
As I was wandering around Baipad’s class this morning, because my class was cancelled and Kru Ren wasn’t there, I learned that a couple of students are taking money from the lazy ones to complete their coursework for them.
It’s enterprising of the hard-working kids to make some spare cash but disappointing from a teacher’s perspective.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I offered Baipad to help her on Monday with all her catchup work. Let’s see if she gets it together to actually wake up and do it.
I helped various students in their different classes today as my own classes being mostly free time for everyone.
Kru Fluke dropped in to visit. I gave her a big smile and a hug, happy to see her again.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 20. Enjoy Small Things. I like clichés because they are true.
Over the last three or four years of self-improvement I’ve followed the Noticing Things blog (I forget the proper name), thought about gratitude every day (with a couple of exceptions) and been writing, journalling, blogging etc. All of these combined have led me to enjoy the small things.
Partly due to this, I’m not often in the vicinity of big things and things that I once thought of as big seem comparatively small these days too (the circumstance of ageing).
One thing that I was doing more of last year or the year before was savouring moments. I don’t often stop to remind myself to savour something now. I should practice that again.
I took this picture last weekend when I was getting my haircut. HoiTod makes me miss little Kim so much, almost one year now since she’s gone. Sniffle.
I’m running at the edge of their world Pushed away and pulled back again I don’t want to fall off the fence And find myself having to explain
They’re criticising something they can’t understand Never taking the time to lend a listening ear On the fence, there’s air to breathe Down below so clouded with fear
I’m living on the edge of their town Itching to break free of the shackles My feet only touch the ground to run The touch paper lighted crackles
And I won’t be shot down I won’t be pulled apart There’s no compromise At the edge of my heart
Inspired by the Stiff Little Fingers song ‘At The Edge’ from which each line of the chorus was taken as the first line of each stanza
And I’m running at the edge of their world They’re criticising something they just can’t understand Living on the edge of their town And I won’t be shot down
Today I’m feeling:
Relaxed and happy. The early birds crawing woke me up before my alarm, along with waking Tigger who then starting crawing too. I slept pretty well otherwise and got back into exercise on this chilly morning. The evening temperatures are perfect but by early morning it’s still cold and then during the day we’re hitting 35 degrees or so.
Today I’m grateful for:
There being yet another event this morning and being able to accommodate the kids wishes to go to it instead of studying. To achieve that I set them a minor task of taking a photo at the event and describing it to me. After sticking around for a few minutes I was able to duck out for coffee and keep up with the classes work as the submitted it to me online.
The best thing about today was:
Feeling good with the poems I was inspired to write today and clearing out some of the growing number of email prompts that I’ve been receiving. I’ve gotten right into this little circle of writers and whilst I don’t enjoy much of what I read I can appreciate the time and effort that they are putting into it and occasionally something does grab my attention that hits the mark.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
The morning event rolled over into the afternoon and so for the second week running my grade 10s were busy and only a few were in the classroom when I got there. Well, that’s fine. I’m not sure if I will get to teach them again this semester. So with even more free time I took the opportunity to wander around the school and talk and play with whoever I found (which was almost everyone!)
Something I learned today?
The last letter added to the English alphabet was ‘J’. Before that, the letter ‘i’ was used for both the ‘i’ and ‘j’ sounds.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I left school at around 3pm and went to Big C and whilst there I suddenly heard ‘Teacher!’ It was Baibua and Khawhom. They looked a little sheepish but also laughing at seeing me shopping. I asked them what they were doing and they indicated that they were going to the movies. But wait a minute! Why aren’t they at school? They said there was nothing to do. Well, that is true. I know and they know it.
With my grade 10 class not showing up I went to help Kru Ren again and offered my help to the different groups of students. I was a little disappointed with Baipad because it turned out that she hadn’t done any work for class for the whole semester. Jan and Apple had done some but not finished it. I asked them why they weren’t doing it now and they just offered up excuses. Sigh. I told Baipad that I can help her catch up this evening if she wants me to but haven’t heard anything from her yet.
David hasn’t been at school for the last three days so I sent him a message asking if he was ok.
What tasks do I often avoid?
I don’t think there’s any task that I avoid completely but I have a different threshold of tolerance to certain things to Amy so in that sense I avoid mopping the floors or cleaning the toilets but if she wasn’t here I would do those things but only when I found it necessary.
Asking Amy what tasks I often avoid might provide a clearer answer.
I took this picture because I wanted to show my students an example of what they were required to do for class (take a picture connected with the event and write a sentence about it). I was happy that almost all of them completed this simple task. I thought this student picture was quite nice and as I took the picture the student who made it was there and his friends were all in awe!
Looking up into the darkness of the night I could have been an astronaut exploring space Tuned into the Sydney Olympics that time I could have been the one that won the race
Trudging through the muddy fields in Autumn We were as soldiers marching off to war Or on the school fields, shoes for posts We were the team with the winning score
Racing Matchbox cars down twisted tracks I will be the one praised with champagne and girls The architect of the biggest castles And a new country whose flag unfurls
But would I always come out on top With the skills that I have got? I may not know so very much But I do know what I’m not
Pretty good. I notice that I’ve been waking up before my alarm recently and with my aching shoulder meaning a lot of tossing and turning during the night along with Cap wanting the door opened a couple of times to go in and out, I’m pretty tired too.
Today I’m grateful for:
Getting new tyres on the car today. I couldn’t really tell the difference but after five or six years I guess it was time.
The best thing about today was:
Having a couple more reading classes in groups of five or six again. It’s a lot of fun even though it means leaving the rest of the class to their own devices until it is their turn.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Just as I was leaving this morning Amy told me that after my first class, I have to go and wait at the car service place until our car is ready, which is hopefully before I’m due back at school! I was looking forward to spending time at the cafe, reading and writing but I guess it doesn’t matter too much as I can do that at the car service place too.
So, after class, I grabbed a takeaway coffee, went to Mum’s, picked up Amy and with a slight detour got to the car service. It was around 11.30 by now and Amy said they thought everything should be done by 12 so we sat around waiting. I did some lesson planning for a while and then someone came and told us that everyone was on a break now and that the car won’t be ready until later.
We tried to work out what to do next as I had to come back to school and Amy was off to visit Nut. How would I get back from school to pick up the car? Amy didn’t want to have to drive back to pick me up. I figured I could get a Grab from school though that would be a pain in the ass as it is really busy around the school at that time.
Whilst we were thinking about this they said that we could pay now and it was then that Amy discovered she didn’t have her credit card and would have to go home and get it and come back anyway! So I said that she may as well come and pick me up too!
So, I don’t know if that makes any sense but all in all it was a waste of two hours with absolutely nothing achieved from that running around.
If I had been the one that had forgotten the card I would never have heard the end of it and I gently reminded Amy of this fact, taking a minute to shine in the glory of not the one being at fault this time. I’m sure this will soon be reversed by something relatively inconsequential that I will be admonished for.
So, ultimately I handled it with smug satisfaction and a little bit of annoyance.
Something I learned today?
I learned that Baipad didn’t do anything special or get any gift from her mum for her birthday which is a bit sad to hear.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I like to think that remaining calm and adaptable to the situation described above was a good deed.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 19. There’s No End Game. We, as a species, just are. Don’t try to figure it all out. Enjoy your journey.
OK, I know that we just are, life is meaningless and I am still enjoying the journey very much.
But I also think it’s ok to try and figure things out as much as I can. For myself, not for the world. I just want to figure out how to make my world the best I can and slowly I see it improving.
Fah took these pictures because my phone was sitting on my desk where she was taking notes from my laptop screen. They were a surprise to me when I went to see what photos I had taken today.
Everyone has gotten access All the words ever written Pictures painted, songs sung Fifty bazillion millisecond process No bugs to be bug bitten The shutdown has begun
Standing in the matrix queue A beta-meta icon version Presses three after the tone There’s nothing left to do In this world’s perversion Except to feel more alone
Got up soon after my alarm, grabbed coffees and then spent a good few hours in my room, adding blog entries, reading and playing guitar.
I was glad to go out and do something different yesterday though I wasn’t particularly excited being at the balloon festival.
I’m not particularly excited by much these days to be honest but I am happy and that’s more important.
Today I’m grateful for:
Air quality being better than this time last year. It’s still not great but can only hope that it doesn’t get worse.
The next week will tell the tale as temperatures rise up to 37 degrees again.
The best thing about today was:
Not taking a nap and having a feeling of not wasting a weekend day. It was pretty relaxed but I got some stuff done so I’m pretty happy with everything.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Not something that was out of my control but it was midday before I remembered that I hadn’t taken my medicine today. As I was in my room I figured I’d take it when I got back inside but forgot again.
By mid-afternoon, I felt a little dizzy when I got up from my chair but figured that I’d made it this far without the medicine that I’d just skip it for today.
Dizziness is the main side effect of not taking it and it’s not like I will drop into a funk just by missing one day.
Something I learned today?
Hayden is in New York. He and his girlfriend were driven down through snow from Canada for 6-7 hours to get there.
They are wrapped up and enjoying New York pizza.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I sent a message to Baipad this morning offering to come and teach her today if she wanted. I didn’t get a reply but I would’ve been happy to if she would have liked.
I was reminded of Baipad later in the evening when reading some blog post about inspiring self-confidence in children helps make them happier adults. In these days of mobile devices as parent substitutes, I wonder what will inspire self-confidence?
I took this picture because this is Tangmo. The dog’s bollocks.
When you are walking towards your maker Be prepared with the biggest machine gun Point it right between their eyes And ask them first, ‘What have I done?’
Ask your questions, demanding proof Let there be no pulling of the leg Your maker may only pronounce the truth ‘What came first, the chicken or the egg?’
Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good but a little tired despite sleeping quite well.
I can feel my muscles aching from the exercising that I’ve been doing. Not just aching but feels like them splitting and dividing under my skin. It’s a tolerable pain that indicates growth, at least to my monkey brain. It doesn’t feel like an injury though my right shoulder is still definitely injured. I need to find some exercises where I can still use my arms and chest without injuring the shoulder further. I adapted my normal arms workout this morning to compensate and that went ok.
Today I’m grateful for:
Bronwyn sending me some old photos of me, my mum and my dad. These are pictures that my mum had and I had seen from time to time in my youth.
They were passed onto Bronwyn to leave for Hayden in the future but I’m glad to see them again.
I also found out that there was a book that my mum wrote quotes and poetry in and I’m interested to see that at some point.
The best thing about today was:
Teaching the new grade 10 class and describing what would happen in real life if they failed to do the work that they are employed to do, just as some students did last week for my class work when I wasn’t there and assigned them something to do in my absence.
I described our classroom as the place of employment, myself as the boss and them as the employees. I showed them on the board that I was promoting some of my employees and demoting others and that in our classroom this would be indicated by grades.
Everyone started at grade 2 (in the middle) but the students who did my work are now at grade 3 whilst those that didn’t are now at grade 1. This certainly got everyone’s attention. I told them that in a real-life work situation, they would likely no longer have a job!
I really enjoyed explaining this and I could see the satisfaction on the newly promoted students faces. All they had to do was what was asked and they’ve been rewarded. I feel like there was some real learning happening and it made me happy to see. I kept the mood light throughout all this but they understood the ramifications of their actions.
In the second act of synchronicity for the day, I read this in an online newsletter and messaged the class to discuss its meaning:
“’I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday’”
Even writing this is making me feel somewhat smug! Haha.
Something I learned today?
There’s an ant species that’s unique to New York City, known as the ManhattAnt.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I’ve been trying to get Baipad to describe her own personality to me because she described her cousin’s personality as similar to her own but she could only answer with ‘you already know.’ I tried to explain that we see ourselves differently from how others see us.
This morning I sat down with her and Jan, with Apple sitting opposite and I said, ‘Come on, let’s play a game. Here’s a list of adjectives, pick ten that describe Apple and we had fun doing that for ten minutes. As I left I told them that tomorrow we will do the same for Jan. And at the weekend I will ask Baipad again to see if she can answer for herself.
I sat with one of my poor grade 7 students (Nut) in class this morning and helped her a lot with trying to understand the text we were reading and how to answer the questions. Some days she is ok to accept my help and today was one of those. When I went to help others she pulled me back to finishing helping her first. I was glad to see this and I think she was glad of my help. She will never be a great English speaker but she is doing all that I ask of her.
I sent a message to JubJib reminding her that perfection is a myth. She happily admits to requiring perfection from herself.
What do I need to embrace about myself?
I’ve become more accepting of my own foibles as I’ve aged. As a sign of maturity, I don’t tend to do things that I wish I hadn’t any more. I’m equating embracing and acceptance here but they feel quite comparable at this age. I am happy with myself and understand myself very well. I know my weaknesses and attempt to improve them slowly without punishing myself.
Where do I hope to be one year from now?
This is an interesting question for me this time as I feel a little in limbo. I am very happy where I am but also considering where do I go from here?
I could quite comfortably maintain my life the way it is. I have no real goals to aim for these days, just continuous improvement. This feels possible due to stability and not having to deal with other stresses that come with the pursuit of new things.
In this way, I’m quite happy to defer to Amy’s ideas about what she wants in the future. That may be a big shock when it comes time for action though, this I know.
Should I have a specific goal for this coming year? I don’t feel particularly ambitious.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 5. Exercise Daily. I didn’t get this until recently. A healthy body is where you have to start everything in life. If you can’t build a healthy and strong body, what CAN you build in life?
I was quite athletic as a child, particularly loving football but once I discovered booze and cigarettes that all slowly went downhill.
Since finally being mostly free of those vices I have started exercising and by doing it first thing in the morning I’ve been able to slowly introduce and lengthen the time spent doing it as I also slowly started to feel the benefits.
Previously I would consistently make the mistake of overdoing the exercise when I would feel the need to get back into it. It’s a mistake probably 80% of us make.
But as I was reading more about developing habits and starting small and as I’ve been teaching my kids about doing things little by little, that idea has slowly slipped into my own brain to find a better way.
Perhaps when I was younger I didn’t want to admit that I was aging. As it took many years to develop this beer belly I’ve accepted that it will take many years to lose it too.
Again, as synchronicity goes, I also just read this:
“The key to exercising regularly, losing weight, being more productive, and achieving success is understanding how habits work.” – Charles Duhigg
I took this picture last week because I was fascinated by the symmetry of this freshly sprouted pineapple. No new pictures today.
The art of war is a lesson in peace The politics of life to make the violence cease The finest swords will all eventually rust To build a legion is to gain their trust
Today I’m feeling:
Happy and positive though I have a nagging tiredness throughout my body. This could possibly be from pushing myself too much with exercise but the benefits of it outweigh this. Some of the things going on in the family are getting me down a little. This is connected with cultural differences but it’s hard not to judge a situation when something is so clearly unfair. No details to share here as yet. Perhaps if and when the situation resolves or is in the past.
Today I’m grateful for:
Finding the candy lady outside of school. Miyor and KhaoFang were walking around the park after classes and I bumped into them and they offered me a bag of candy of a type that I’d never seen before. I took one and it was tasty so I asked where they got them and they pointed to one of the stalls so I went to investigate and there was a cornucopia there! It was also a pick and mix so I picked out a couple of each to try the range. I didn’t eat any yet – I’m saving them for the weekend.
I was laughing to myself today about it because it feels just like when I was at school as a teenager. I always skipped lunch, saving my money to buy records instead. Then I would scrounge pennies off friends and buy candy from the van that pulled up in the playground every lunchtime.
The best thing about today was:
Getting my work permit so quickly sorted that I had time to grab another coffee before my class started. I guess it doesn’t take long when you’re handing over 6,000 baht.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
After making copies of my work permit I headed over to the office. It was only while I was there that I discovered that I have to fill out the visa application and pay another 2,000 baht for the visa when I take it to immigration next week. I thought that whole process was already done when I was at immigration at the end of last year but it seems that I was just on a bridging visa. Amy was not impressed to hear this, especially as I don’t even have 2,000 baht left this month.
Something I learned today?
This evening I found out that the 6,000 baht will get refunded next month. Woohoo!
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I sat and helped a couple of students again, taking the time to work with them and encourage them.
Every morning now, when I arrive at school, I join Baipad, Jan and Apple and talk with them for a few minutes. Sometimes it’s a struggle to get them to look away from their phones but slowly they are opening up and chatting a little bit. I can especially feel that Apple is more relaxed now to speak English.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 4. Don’t Start A Relationship If You’re Not in Love. I’ve done this more than once. You kind of like someone and think: “We might as well give it a shot.” Not a good idea. You’re either in love, or you are not. Don’t fool yourself. It’s not fair to you and the other person.
The difficulty with this is when growing up and learning about love. Our societies don’t emotionally prepare us as children for the consequences of love. It’s quite noticeable here in Chiang Rai, Thailand that a fair percentage of teenagers are not so much into the idea of romantic relationships yet. They might have urges and desires but many are still learning about how to make good friendships amongst themselves. I used to think that this was somewhat of a downside to the kid’s development and that they were growing up too slowly but now I see it as a benefit. In the West we are not aware of all the privileges that we have just by circumstance, to be able to grow up so quickly, whether mature or not.
In my own experience, I thought I was in love many times as a teenager but I was just in love with the idea of love, without knowing what it really was. My first relationships were rough on my partners as I had no clue how to treat them, having been told through society that chocolates and flowers could fix anything. It wasn’t until my mid-20s, meeting Bronwyn that I first felt what I consider to be true love. And then even that was not enough to keep us together.
It’s way too easy to say ‘Don’t fool yourself.’ We fool ourselves all the time without knowing. We do have to go through the process – love, lose and learn. Not many people get things right the first time.
Now I try to teach my students to guard themselves somewhat, to protect themselves from the huge emotional twists and turns of young love. When they break up, to encourage them not to dwell on something that wasn’t meant to be. To stop feeling like it is the end of the world. But I know, it feels just like that and words are sometimes little comfort.
I took this picture because this is an unusual sight, to find both our cats sitting on the same mat like this.
At the flick of the switch There’s no transformation Remaining an ape or beast Change requires dedication No more time to waste If you wish the click to clack When you look at the sun It’s impossible to put it back
Reflecting on our animal nature A broken machine needing self-repair Once burdened by distraction Soon found themselves made it there Feed the mind with thought That keeps on the light Keep quiet and count the days When everything became quite right
Today I’m feeling:
A bit more relaxed after an extra hour’s sleep. Today is teachers’ day (apparently) and a day off from school though we are busy again at the temple. At least I got two Utopian coffees to kick off this morning.
I didn’t feel too hot after lunch and though feeling sleepy couldn’t get into a deep nap state.
Today I’m grateful for:
Whoever made the Thai snack boxes for the funeral ceremony tonight. There were enough left over for me to take some home.
The best thing about today was:
Mostly devoting my time to other people, though at the temple I’m not really doing much because I don’t know the etiquette or what is required but as soon as I’m asked I will do what is needed.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
At Utopia this morning I couldn’t stop sneezing! I sneezed about fifty times and Nick and Art were worried about me!
Something I learned today?
The top five wealthiest people in the world doubled their wealth last year! Just in one year. I’m guessing that for many others in the world, they halved their wealth. The miracle of trickle-up economics, or should I say flooding-up?
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I’ve been a good boy again, doing as I’m told at the temple. I kneeled to the boy monk as I handed him pizza for lunch! Good luck boy monk. Stay off your phone.
Driving twice in and out of the city again despite feeling not 100%. Tired by the afternoon and my sinuses feel uncomfortable.
List 3 good things you have now that you didn’t have five years ago.
I thought that this would be difficult as I haven’t really acquired ‘things’ that much but five years is a long time and I acquired one of the biggest things in people’s lives and that is a home.
This time five years ago our house was built but it hadn’t quite been turned into a home, at least as I feel about it now.
I feel comfortable and safe around our house and neighbourhood and inside is Amy’s playground for decorating. If I thought about it more and knew where to buy things easily and cheaply perhaps I would make a home environment that suits me too but I’m also a little lazy to do that. Mine and Amy’s ideas are not that compatible and I’m happy to defer to her in this instance. Actually, I’m happy to defer to her most of the time.
Five years ago I didn’t have a guitar and that cheap instrument has brought me a lot of pleasure since purchase. I don’t think that a better quality guitar will improve my playing that much so I’m happy with what I’ve got.
The last thing I have is a deeper love. My love and connection with my students has grown so much in this time and it fills me with joy. I wonder where all our futures will take us.
As I was messaging with Baipad, who is in her grandmum’s village for ดำหัวผู้ใหญ่, she told me that her mum told her to send me this picture of them in their traditional Lahu dress. Fatman report
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