Lighthouses – 16th July 2022

Who’s gonna care for you?
Who will show the way?
Who will find the light
When the sun descends each day?
A child to be exploited
Manipulated and prostituted
Bad choices made with mirrors
Doors shut, firmly booted

Who’s gonna guide you?
Point to the right direction
A childhood to be wasted
Staring at its reflection
Dark fingers will be clawing
Promises made with gold
Sorrow is your struggle
Before you get too old


And then I find a book that I really love, and I talk about it for a while so I won’t seem like I hate everything. In other words, I hate everything!

Matthilda Bertstein Sycamore
Fatman report

Duk Dik – 20th June 2022

Always active, nervous twitching
Under the skin, blood is itching
Actions precede thought
Which evaporate to nought
Leaving all around you bitching

11th Sept 2023 – In Thai ‘duk dik’ means constantly moving around. This phrase can be used for my students in most of my classes.


The highs and lows I have known have turned me inward to the point where I’ll never feel anything close to normal. I don’t feel isolated, I don’t want in… There’s no confession to make, there’s no truth burning to come ripping out of me… I will always make relationships with people an approximation of a relationship. I think that’s better. I think things are more beautiful when you’re on the outside.

Henry Rollins

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be able to find the books I want to read from Dasa Books in Bangkok or even able to order from overseas using Amazon.

Get The Winch – 28th May 2022

You used to be an armchair warrior
But now you got so fucking fat
You’ve become a sofa warrior
Unable to wriggle from where you’re sat

14th May 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt


Sometimes I like to read a book that has nothing to do with my life, which often has the effect of making me wish for a different life.

Elisa Gabbert

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for all the technology we use so that Amy can order and pay for food for our cats to be delivered to me and can see her face on video calls for her mum’s birthday today, even though we are in different hemispheres.

Happy Weeds – 16th April 2022

In this garden of life
I’m a simple weed, underachieving
Yet I can grow anywhere
And I’ll never stop believing
Happily, I join in chorus
As fellow weeds, we will survive
Take whatever is thrown at us
We’re just glad to be alive


I refuse to grow younger. I came by my decreptitude the hard way and I propose to enjoy it.

Jubal, Stranger In A Strange Land by Robert Heinlein

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be able to read all the great stories that smart people took the trouble to write, whether it’s comics or books.

Fatman report

In The Alley – 25th December 2021

There in the alley, the marginal spaces
The ministers mix with the drunk
Between the tavern and the church
Was the birth of soul and funk

Here lies the crux to save humanity
The bleed maintains the goal
Has heaven found its place on earth
Where angels delivered funk and soul?

Keep on pushin’, Minister Curtis
Not just shaking shaggy, do wow!
We got to find the rhythms of peace
And we got to find them now

adapted from a LitHub article about Curtis Mayfield


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for our palm trees, whose fronds Tangmo really loves to play with when they have fallen to the ground.


A pleasant morning, waking without an alarm and inspired enough to get back to the abs regime. I’ve just been doing two sets of 25 sit-ups a day, sticking my feet under the lounge as leverage. I’m hoping my muscles eventually become strong enough to pull my body up without having to use my legs.

Amy has been baking carrot cake as Christmas gifts and we first took one to Art at Utopia, which was enjoyed and they rewarded me with an awesome new coffee blend from Melbourne. Then, to Cafe With No Name to drop off their cake.

Back now for relaxing lunch and reading my first Samuel Beckett, which I now understand Sean Hughes’ fascination with. Looking at my book shelves, there are just so many great books I have that I can’t wait to read.

This evening we are off to Singha Park with Amy’s parents for a family Christmas dinner.

Reading In Bed – 30th November 2021

They were so meaningful, the words I read
As I fell to sleep, they remained in my head
They resonated more than any words said
But something happened as I was sleeping in my bed

This morning the memory struggles to recall
My mind is empty, without any words at all
Not even the gist, a notion or a vague idea
One day they’ll pop up again and the memory will be clear


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the two chairs we have on our front porch where we can watch the sunrise over the mountains on these cool winter days.


A quick one today as I dash out in between classes. Both my classes this morning were great and all students took part. It seems weird that last week parents were complaining about me and then this week students seem to be trying harder. Hopefully, the parents pushed their children a little too.

It makes me feel more confident in what I’m doing. One more class this afternoon and then some time to read and plan. Just one class tomorrow, so lots of free time to prepare for next week.

Read A Book – 2nd November 2021

Gonna be a good day, gonna read a book
Even the adults are smiling everywhere I look
The sun may not be shining but our hearts are bright
It’s gonna be a good day, gonna let in the light


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to see my students back at school again today. They were happy to see each other but not so happy to study again.


Busy and mostly successful day at school. No time to read or write, really, and one hurried coffee in the morning. I felt good and happy, though.

But now I’m tired and feeling it a little. We haven’t been given any schedule for tomorrow yet, so I can only hope that it’s not as filled as today. Either way, I will cope and enjoy my day.


The Week That Was – 28th January 1979

The thousand nights spent on the floating ship, I wish I had another night – 11th October 2021

After reading both Stephen Fry’s books on Greek Myths and Heroes I picked up two volumes of The Arabian Nights (or One Thousand and One Nights) and I started reading the first one today.

Whilst I was reading I was conscious of the fact that I often take something in from the story and then almost immediately forget the details. For instance, I started reading a new bedtime book last night and today I can’t even remember what it is. Just being a file on my iPad doesn’t help with trying to remember things either.

So as I was reading this first story, which sets up the premise for the rest of the book, I decided I should write down a summary of the events, without too much detail, to help me remember, but also to understand more deeply.

Summary of the Story Of King Shahryar and His Brother

There were two brothers. One found his wife cheating with another man, so killed her. He was devastated by her betrayal and also remorseful for having killed her. He made himself sick.
The other brother, seeing him sick, took him in but whilst there found his brother’s wife cheating too. He realised that whilst he was suffering, others were also suffering. Telling himself things weren’t so bad he started to feel better.
His brother asked what had brought about this change and he reluctantly told of what he saw. Once the brother also saw this betrayal with his own eyes, he too, killed his wife.
They decided to get away from their betrayals and perhaps seek others who were suffering even more, a way to make themselves feel better.
They came across a monster, who kept his wife locked up. He had let her out and promptly fallen asleep, whereupon she saw the two brothers and insisted they make love to her whilst the monster slept.
They saw that the monster was suffering even more than themselves but the actions of the woman were immoral and vowed never to trust a woman again.
They returned to their lives and after sleeping with a virgin woman, killed her the following day so she would never be able to twist the hearts of men.
Eventually, virgins were becoming scarce and one brother asked his friend where to find more. The friend repeated the story to his two virgin daughters and one insisted she knew a way to put an end to this difficult situation.

These weak men, never challenging themselves as complicit in their wives’ actions, prefer to blame and punish what they dare not understand. Of course, women have suffered in every region and era of history yet it begs belief that if tales such as this become established amongst children they are likely to take that into adulthood and pass it on from generation to generation.

Should tales of old be updated for modern audiences and cultures? Cut the wheat from the chaff? Should they be completely replaced?

Of course, the summary ends on a more positive note as a woman is prepared to put herself in danger to provide a solution. Does it work? I don’t know yet.

I purposely left out the fact that the brothers are kings and tried to make the summary more human. The downside of this is that it is not in most human minds or possibility to kill every woman they sleep with. Being a king (or having that illusion) seems to allow for that possibility!

I used monster instead of jinn or genie as I was trying to understand what difference this makes. I feel that a human can be a monster but not a genie.

As in all good stories, I want to know what happens next.


Seeds Of Regret

*Am I living in the hearth
And home of the now?
For all the present is worth
Before the future I bow

*Last year I had a clear cut
If lunatic, set of ideas
Ventured onwards but
Paralysed by my new fears

*Why doesn’t someone start a fire
Close enough for me to see?
To burn through my fields of desire
*Why doesn’t someone kick me?

*Easy going as I farm
Sowing the seeds of regret
There’s no cause for alarm
As it hasn’t happened yet

*All swiped from Glenn Dakin’s ‘Abe – Wrong for the Right Reasons’

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for this fan today. It feels super humid this morning though the air temperature is ok. This fan is doing the job it was designed for.


Tangmo has not been himself recently. He doesn’t come to visit so often and instead of running in and jumping around, he wanders in and sits down. He doesn’t even get excited when he sees Kim Chi. Yesterday evening, Amy and I walked him back to his home and we found out that our neighbours were aware he was sick but hadn’t taken him to a vet and were giving him human medicine, though medicine for what, we have no idea.

Mo looks so sad and sick, it is hard not to be sympathetic and give him hugs. We try to remember that he’s not our dog and we are not responsible for him but it’s hard not to have heartstrings tugged by his sad face.

The weekend was fine with me just puttering around doing all the little things I enjoy. Lots of guitar practice yesterday.

Writer’s Trick – 25th September 2021

Far across galaxies, I was taken
Flying towards the story’s end
A misdirection, a writer’s trick
On which the reader may depend

A cliffhanger chapter break
The reader left wanting more
Another leaf is turned
In this new world to explore

Better than a Netflix series
Read a book and chill instead
I wonder who will survive
And who will end up dead?


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for Amy’s friends who all ordered cinnamon buns from her when she posted online about them. She’s going to be busy.


Woke up this morning to Amy screaming ‘help’ and my name. I thought perhaps one of the cats had brought in a snake but it was just Cap and Tigger fighting each other again, clumps of fur scattered all about the kitchen and dining room. I don’t know why they have never gotten along. They tolerate each other but barely.

It wasn’t even 7 am but I got up and forced myself to do my mini workout for which I feel good for, right now. Must remind myself about this feeling each morning.