Tag: Changes

The Beautiful People – 29th September 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Heads may turn in Soho streets
At soirees at the Ritz
And so this scene oft repeats
Amongst the glamour and the glitz

Here are seen the painted faces
And the finest flowing dresses
But the real beautiful people
Are down playing in their messes

The artists and bohemian types
The dustbin men, already sleeping
Absent of any media hypes
Content in the company they’re keeping

The farmers covered in mud and shit
The real diamonds under dusty feet
Pearly smiles gleam as they exit the pit
Just enough energy left to eat

All the beautiful people go unseen
Away from the cameras clicking
This is how it has always been
Since the time that kings came tricking

Let’s celebrate their grime and sweat
Grateful for the time they’re giving
Don’t let the glamour rats forget
Why they enjoy the way they’re living

21st Mar 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – Colourful Streets

Today I’m feeling:

Relaxed and a little sad. Most of my relationships now have been formed around my students and I know that I will miss them during the holidays. Some students feel the same, not necessarily about me but about not being able to meet their friends often. But it is also great to have a break from it all too and I’m starting to look forward to going to Australia.

Today I’m grateful for:

Nong Gam for putting a frangipani behind my ear, giving me a hug and saying she will miss me in the holiday. I have appreciated her efforts to improve her English this semester and she has appreciated the time I spent to help her.

The best thing about today was:

Little Nicha wrote a very sweet message for me in the Quizizz I gave her class today. Along the lines of ‘Thank you to help me learn more when I am struggling and for comforting me when I was sad.’  I’m tearing up a little just writing it! 

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I had psyched myself up to stay at school and play a little tennis with Funfai before her coaching but it had rained a lot during the afternoon and I wasn’t sure if she would still go. She said she wanted to and the rain had cleared so I waited around playing volleyball with a bunch of other kids. But then more rain came and I gave up and we agreed to try again next semester when there will be less rain. 

So, it was annoying that I stayed around when I could’ve gone home quicker but I still enjoyed the time hanging out with different students.

Something I learned today?

Last night I was following up on the drama at school with Feije and asked Nong Fah what was the story. She told me a little and it was a totally new story to the one from the day before! 

When I asked Fah what she thought about the events she said she didn’t know, much like when I asked her before what was up with Feije recently. I then realised that she was being typically Thai-style diplomatic and didn’t want to say anything bad about someone else. 

I found this kind of endearing but also frustrating in that it’s difficult to know how people really feel about things in Thai culture.

Either way, it was an interesting learning experience for me to see how some cultural norms are here through the lens of my students.

Also in relation to yesterday, the student having trouble with his friends messaged me saying he stopped being friends with them because they were punching him. I told him that friends don’t do that and that he can tell me if they keep bullying him. He said that it was okay because he didn’t want to cause any trouble. I told him that I understood but that I was there if he needed me. 

I thought that this was a kind of Thai attitude but now I’m writing more I guess this is how many kids deal with being bullied anywhere in the world.

What changes did I experience this past month?

This feels a little difficult to contemplate these days. Things are changing a lot more slowly than previously and are less noticeable.  I guess that as it’s gotten to the end of September I’m starting to feel a little excitement about going to Australia, as I will leave in ten days time.

Also as the month has gone on and the holiday approached, I’ve felt a gradual winding down and relaxation in the classroom.

I took this picture because I have no new pictures today so scouted around the house for something interesting. These cats are part of a set of 5. The picture behind is from a long time back as I was still dying my hair black then. I think it’s from a trip to somewhere in Thailand.

Writing For Myself – 25th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

The words I write, they are for me
Sure to be making assumptions
We are brothers and sisters in arms
(and anyone that cares to fall between)

Sometimes listening to the wind
Eases my burden, settles my heart

The hard code of my heart
Has been passed along for generations
back to the dawn of time

Now at this time of life, whenever it is
Let’s hope the engine keeps running

I only stop learning to rest my eyes
Things long gone are encoded and not forgotten
Whatever is coming towards me
Is all a part of nature’s play

A paraphrasing of section 1 of Walt Whitman’s Song For Myself
2nd May 2024 – Submitted to dVerse

Today I’m feeling:

Like I had a long day with three two-hour classes. I enjoy the days filled with work just as much as the days with little to do. I don’t really have a chance to think about how I’m feeling until I get home, have a cold shower and rest my aching legs. By that time I’m happy with the work being completed.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Tongjai for offering to write some instructions for my classes in Thai to help sort out the login problems I was having with Quizizz. She said she would do it at around midday. However during my classes that morning I figured out how to fix the problem myself and finally understood how it worked. When I saw her in the afternoon I told her I had sorted it out and she was happy because she had gotten called away to do something else too. I’ve learned to trust in things working out in time but this one was getting me worried as all my lessons are arranged around using the website. As I’ve been looking deeper into the website reporting I am also seeing more and more great options for the classroom. So I am grateful to Quizizz too.

The best thing about today was:

As mentioned above, figuring out fixing that problem felt pretty good. Along with that was some welcome rain and a continued good feeling amongst the students at school.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Finding out my student lists are all messed up was a bit annoying but then I remembered that this happens every year. One upside of this was figuring out who students were by their student ID numbers stitched onto their uniforms in Thai script. I need to learn how their numbers are written.

Something I learned today?

Looking at what I’ve written already I can see that I’ve learned many things today that are at least of some use in my day-to-day life. Maybe not substantial life-changing knowledge but useful at least.

What changes am I experiencing in my life right now?

Some physical changes due to aging such as getting tired more easily and not being able to get all my pee put easily. Will the upside of that be that I won’t suffer incontinence though maybe kidney stones instead? 
As to mental changes, I believe I am still learning and getting smarter each day. I think I’m happier as I age too, the irony of which is not lost on me.
As to life in general I don’t feel like there are any significant changes really. Nothing beyond what I can expect. There will be a change soon enough when Amy gets back in October which will have to be dealt with but I feel confident we will work things out for the best.

I took this picture from the top floor of our school building because I have to remind myself how nice it is here. I am comfortable and relaxed with my work stresses. Things are going well.

The Whys Men – 28th March 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Kojaked caveman meditating
Declares life is a fountain
No ears received this pronunciation
At the hole in the mountain

Yulled madmen levitating
In boxes across the skies
Searching for any piece of wisdom
To answer the many whys

For fifty years the mystic
Held his arm above his head
Heard the echo from the cave
And suddenly fell down dead

The market stopped a breath
Then continued walking about
The circle of life and death
Is all it’s ever been talking about

Today I’m feeling:

Sick, headache, tired from lack of sleep because my eyes were sore and kept waking me up.

Today I’m grateful for:

The fact that I can take a day off work, go to the hospital, afford medicine and sit inside with the air purifier. I know these are getting repetitive but when I see labourers working outdoors in this pollution I must feel very grateful.

The best thing about today was:

Getting prescribed pseudoephedrine at the hospital for my nose being blocked and irritated and then lorazepam to help me sleep. My body is a medicine cabinet! The pseudoephedrine has put me off eating though. Not sure if I will go back to work tomorrow yet.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I felt like lots of things were out of my control today but just let it go. My health, the air, waiting at the hospital, the medicines provided and then the effects of taking the medicines.

Amy was critical of me wanting to stay here but what can I do right now? I’m here and our cats are here. Yes, this situation sucks and we could change it if we wanted but that would involve us buying a place to live in South Thailand.

Hopefully, this pollution problem goes soon, it’s already better today but I hope it gets fixed properly for the future.

The last couple of years have been really good here. Wherever we go has its good and bad points.

Something I learned today?

Watching Tim Newton talking about Thai news today was interesting as it featured the pollution problem here in the north. Apparently, there were protests at the district office in CR yesterday and there are more people speaking out now about the issue. I’m still doubtful anything will get done quickly or anything substantial but who knows.

What changes am I experiencing right now?

The change from teaching to holiday is fucking me up. I’m getting lazy though other things factor into that too, such as the weather and pollution. I have to find some things to do during this time to keep my brain occupied and body moving.

I took this picture because after finishing at the hospital I went to Utopia for coffee and was presented with this!