Tag: China

Built With Blood – 11th September 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Send me down to the countryside
I’ll happily dig our ditches
For the benefit of the countrywide
Will one day lead to riches

Teach me how to let the water flow
And guard against the flood
Help each other to thrive and grow
Community built on sweat and blood

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good though still a little rundown. My weekends are feeling the reverse of how they used to. I’m enjoying being at school during the day more than being at home. I know Amy will fill my time again when she’s back so I really should be relishing these lazy weekends of freedom. I’m not quite sure why I’m not.

Today I’m grateful for:

The last four candies I had in my car. When I got to school, the little group of kids I usually talk with were hanging out, eating breakfast. Noah looked at me with a smile and told me ‘Lin is crying’ and so she was. She had a snotty nose but didn’t look too sad. 

I tried to find out what was upsetting her and all it seemed to be was that the food she bought for breakfast tasted bad. I think she knew that it wasn’t something so serious to be crying about but perhaps it was just an overwhelming feeling of disappointment and hunger. Tears then poured off her cheeks and into her lap though as Noah, bemused, sat by and comforted her.

Later I gave her the last of my candies and she was already feeling better.

The best thing about today was:

Finishing updating the blog with the handwritten gratitude journal entries. Another book out of the way. A lot more to go but at least I’m not adding so much more these days as I write here in the app instead.

I’ll finish up the diary and old poetry book before adding another book into my bag. I only have one more old diary to go, from 1985.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

At the beginning of my class today two girls asked if they could go to get water which I allowed them to do as I took the register and handed out worksheets. I didn’t think much about what else was going on around me but soon realised when the girls turned up again five minutes totally drenched in the storm that came through. They had no way to dry off except jumping up and down and shaking themselves off and needless to say that didn’t really work. They couldn’t do my work because they would have just gotten the sheet wet but they agreed to do it home tonight. Let’s see if they do.

Something I learned today?

There is a city in China called Nagqu that is larger by area than Sweden! This ‘factoid’ seems to depend a lot on the definition of city though.

How am I using technology to make my life better?

Mainly for reading books and articles but there are probably many more that I’m already taking for granted. I am from a time when microwaves were the brand new thing, otherwise I would be scrubbing baked beans stuck on the bottom of the saucepan til this day.

The amount of information readily available now is overwhelming and I think most people are struggling to get to grips with it all.

I do still prefer the traditional methods for consuming information and entertainment such as books, comics and CDs but even these are diminishing now. I used to collect vinyl, comics and DVDs but all these things are now readily available, legal or not, at a few clicks.

I’m sometimes somewhat dubious that this makes my life better.

What is most important?

A healthy body, a healthy mind? Love? Amy? Hayden? My cats? My home? My work?
Most important….?
Is anything important?

What is in my control?
The struggle. The suffering. The stress. 
To be here. To breathe. To persevere.

This question raises more questions. Or am I just avoiding a definitive answer?
Most important to me must be myself. If I don’t take care of that how can I take care of anything else.

I took this picture because the combination of the misters in the cafe entrance garden, the downpour of rain and the dark foreboding clouds suddenly made this exit from a modern cafe feel like the beginning of an adventure into a damp and mysterious wonderland.

Unlovable – 6th August 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Why did she think she was unlovable?
I know she deserved much better than me
It hurt us both at the time
But the right thing to do to set her free

Then it was I who became unlovable
And I myself chose to believe
Eventually, we both came to realise
It’s only ourselves we deceive

A true story.

Today I’m feeling:

As predicted I had to get up a couple of times in the night as my guts gurgled and my ass burned and I had to skip my usual alarm not getting up for another two-plus hours at around 9.30 am. The grey outside had maintained the same level of brightness that it still seemed early morning. I skipped a shower and went straight for coffee, still wary that caffeine may soon trigger some kind of explosive action from my rear but so far so good.

When I got home I found that our clock had stopped last night and discovered that I had an extra hour and a half of day left. Bonus!

Today I’m grateful for:

Grabbing some soft serve ice cream at the little stall near the market which happens to be next door to where my student Baipad lives. I looked into the shop, which is a hairdresser and saw what must have been Baipad’s little sister running around. She was totally a mini version of Baipad which is saying something as Baipad is already short. She looked super cute.

Anyway, the ice cream was yummy.

The best thing about today was:

The grey skies never lifted for the whole day and rain is forecast 100% for the next eight days too. So it’s difficult to say what might have been the best thing today beyond such usual things as reading books and reading comics. That’s OK. It wasn’t a bad day by any means.

Oh, I just remembered I spent a couple of hours watching the football this morning too. That was pretty good as we won in a tight game with the Giants. With three games left, there is still a slim chance we can make the finals but it means winning every game and other results going our way.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Weather-inspired lethargy set in early. I just went with it.

Something I learned today?

China’s natural gas and oil reserves are deeper than other countries forcing them to drill the deepest holes ever and pushing their technological advancement at the same time.

What are three small victories I’ve achieved lately?

I’d somehow like to think that I have won over at least three lazy naughty students recently but should probably only count that as one.

I’m struggling to think of things I might consider victories. Life might be a battle but moving forward doesn’t feel like victory it just feels normal. Perhaps as a good life should.

Slow improvements to learning Thai and playing guitar don’t feel like victories because that’s the natural outcome of practice.

Victory also feels like it implies that there is a loser too.

Are there three losses that I’ve accepted recently? I don’t think so.

Rista took this picture last week because she wanted to see the camera quality on my new phone. This is her and Namkhing, who everyone seems to love. Her English is very poor but she will happily try when I push her which is a positive as far as I’m concerned. Perhaps this is part of her personality which others find attractive.
Posting this picture as, unsurprisingly, I didn’t take any today. With the forecast, I’m wondering when I might take more again.

4/6 Time – 1st August 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Keep the rhythm
Hold onto harmony
No sleepwalking

Meditate on
Presence and principles
Mindful essence

Stop pulling strings
No imagination
Confine yourself

To the present
All with objective calm
It’s up to us

inspired by a recent Stoa Letter newsletter

9th Jun 2024 – Submitted to the Word of the Day Challenge

Today I’m feeling:

A bit more lively and with it. Forgotten now, I know that I had a few different but quite realistic dreams. I was happy to enjoy them. I also managed to push through 75 star jumps and ride my pushie to Utopia for coffee. If I could tell myself every morning that a good day always starts with exercise perhaps I could motivate myself to do it at weekends.

Today I’m grateful for:

The digging tool we have for working in the garden. I guess it’s a hoe of some sort as it can be used for that too. Swing it high and hard enough though and it can dig. I’m also grateful for the recent rains making the ground a little easier to dig too. The two little trees were quickly in the ground and I look forward to watching them mature.

The best thing about today was:

Watching Amy bravely battle an arm-sized tokay in the kitchen and work room. I knew she wouldn’t rest until it was caught and outside. We had to chase it a bit and move some furniture but eventually, I managed to trap it in a plastic bin against the wall and Amy slid a mat across the top and quickly carried it outside where it finally ran off. 

I think the lizards look amazing and they are pretty shy. They only get agitated if you bother them. They do shit everywhere though, along with all the little geckos that are running around our house. 

I’m going to buy some lizard repellent sometime, though Amy said she read reviews that they can actually attract more lizards rather than get rid of them!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Amy had a few requests for jobs for me to do during the day but as I was in an improved mood I just did them happily.

Something I learned today?

I chuckled at a report today of the EU sending warships to the South China Sea to protect trade routes from Chinese interference. More than 80% of the shipping through the SCS are ships coming from and going to China! The spin of the hypocrites in the West is amazing. Is there another agenda?

What do I want to focus on this month?

Focus? I’m not sure to be honest. Trying to save a little money would be useful because I have to buy a lot of cat food and get the car serviced this month. But basically, it is business as usual. Teaching, learning, reading, writing, guitar, cleaning, coffee, exercise.

Amy took this picture because she was quite proud of her carrot cakes. They look great but we haven’t tasted them yet. I’m sure they will taste great too though.

A Page Perfect – 16th July 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Perfect, unspoiled and clean
Yet only in imperfections
May the true art be seen

Here writ large, words spilled
To taint the page
Until it may be filled

Thoughts inspired, pour out pure
So much of myself
Of mess, of which I’m sure

Inspired by this post at Spinning Visions

Today I’m feeling:

Exhausted but Amy has me up and running around again. It’s ok. It’s 1pm and it feels like I’ve done about 8 hours already. That feeling is good sometimes. Still plenty of day left.

Today I’m grateful for:

The salted caramel popcorn Amy brought back from Australia. It’s pretty good, not too sweet. There’s also a pack of chocolate-drizzled popcorn here to look forward to too.

The best thing about today was:

Pretty much everything I guess. The time has gone so quickly despite what I wrote earlier. I guess I’m trying to squeeze in the things I normally do when I’m here by myself along with all the things that I’m now doing with Amy too. I’m kinda looking forward to going to school tomorrow because I only have one class so will be able to spend time with my best friend, coffee, all morning.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The neighbour’s kids all came and played with me yesterday whilst I was picking weeds out in the driveway. They even came with me into the entertainment area when I was hanging from the gym rings. Of course, the boys wanted a go too so I lifted them up and they grabbed on and they screamed for me to help them as they lost their grip. Today, uninvited, they came right up on our terrace whilst Amy was trying to sleep so I quietly went out and tried to keep them entertained but that lasted all of about ten seconds. After entertaining them again for a few minutes I managed to usher them away and came back inside to find Amy reluctantly awake. She wasn’t grumpy about it though. As I watched things on TV and Amy read, they snuck back and around the side of the house and started tapping on the window. Amy said not to engage with them and after a while, they got bored and went off on other adventures. I don’t mind the kids at all but our cats hate them and always run off and hide somewhere. I don’t want them coming back every day thinking they can do as they please here.

Something I learned today?

China just tested a new high-speed train that can reach 453 km/h! This could make a train trip from Beijing to Shanghai just 2 and a half hours. That’s pretty wild. I just hope that one of these things never crashes!

What is something I’ve been wanting to try, but haven’t yet?

Hmm…I think that probably the obvious choice for me now is to travel to Vietnam, Cambodia and Indonesia. This was one of the reasons for us to be located in Thailand, ease of travel in Asia. Somehow at the moment, I’m a little afraid to travel again though. I feel like I’ve lost that mojo a little. My life has been so comfortable here that I can just enjoy everything without going anywhere.

I took this picture because being a cat (with a caring owner ) has got to be the best life.
Fatman report

Idea Of Heaven – 4th July 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

We still have to teach the Gods to be human
They should bend to our will, not us to theirs
First, we have to understand ourselves
And an idea of heaven that everyone shares

Today I’m feeling:

I didn’t sleep well but felt ok at my alarm. Two hours into the day though and I’m feeling a little low and flat. My eyes are sore again and the cloudy grey skies feel depressing.

Last night Paen (Baitoey) contacted me again feeling depressed and suicidal. I don’t know how much more I can give her. I know she doesn’t have the skills but it seems like she doesn’t want to do the hard work and is always looking for the easy way out. She needs some guidance to turn her thinking around and I’m not the best person for that.

Her struggles weigh me down too.

Today I’m grateful for:

Payment coming through today as I was just about to run out of money. It meant I could pay the gardener who came today and can also order some more cat food now too. I still have money put aside for the aircon fix and hopefully enough spare for the plumbing fixes. Not sure if there will be enough for the guttering though.

The best thing about today was:

Many interesting conversations with my students outside of class.  They usually remind me about things I went through when I was their age.

Also, Champ was back from Australia for a quick visit and he was telling me that he had to do some part-time work to be able to afford to stay there whilst studying. He’s working at a school teaching grade 5 kids. He was comparing the difference between the education systems in Oz and in Thailand and that he now has a clearer understanding of us farang teachers when we work here and get frustrated at the way things work. I’ve adapted myself now but it does feel like a little vindication.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

When I got home I could see that the gardeners had been. I’m thankful to them for tidying up our home but also can’t help noticing what a bad job they are doing. After asking them to clear the weeds properly along the driveway last time, this time they made no attempt at all. Worse still was that they cut the avocado tree that Bruno gave me last year, cut at the trunk! It was just starting to grow well and looked like it would develop into a nice-looking young tree. Fucking careless.

Something I learned today?

The great Chinese spy balloon incident is over. The US admitted that they found no evidence of anything beyond the weather instrumentation that the Chinese told them it was. The US is in the hands of adults acting like 5-year-olds.

How did I practice kindness?

Today I sat down with Paen and listened to her grievances about her life and what help she would like me to give her. She actually didn’t say much, I did most of the talking. I challenged her a lot because I can see that she is just running away from the real issue which is her own self-esteem, insecurities and problems at home. I can see that the things she wants me to help her with are not long-term solutions. 

I have shown her a lot of kindness and tried to help her many times. I can’t fix what happens in her head but I will support her as best I can.

I also ran into Preawa during the day and she was having some kind of problem with her boyfriend who was following her around forlornly. I messaged her this evening to see if she was ok and she said she was and appreciated my concern.

I think one of the reasons that the kids like me is that the can feel my empathy towards them even as I might be berating them for being lazy. I may not be the best teacher in the world but I think I’m a pretty good human.

What do I want to focus on today?

It looks like I will have to focus some time on helping Paen to see if she can change programs back to English. I see this as a band-aid solution for her because the problems are coming from within herself. I’ll try and find her the school counsellor and also find out why she stopped taking her meds. She seemed to be doing well in the first couple of weeks of the new semester.

I took this picture at the weekend because I’m loving seeing the freshly planted rice paddies. Is this a Thai spring?

World Expanding – 17th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Stealing away at sunset
To the corner of the block
Distant twinkling on the horizon
There lies a future to unlock

Reaching out to infinity
If only with open eyes
Beyond the grip of safety
A world full of surprise

Removing the lines drawn
To travel the streets alone
Comfortable in the welcome
Arms returning home

And slowly, steps are growing
The night reveals the joy
For the wanderer, the movie
Of boy meets girl meets boy

Next the flight over oceans
To a scary place indeed
Where next to expand the mind?
Wherever it is, Godspeed

Inspired by this post by Makenna Karas

5th Jun 2024 – Submitted to Weekly Prompts Wednesday Challenge

Today I’m feeling:

I’d set my alarm later than usual for 8 am but that still wasn’t enough sleep and when I finally got up an hour later I was still groggy. I did 60 jumping jacks and had a cold shower to wake up and my body feels good though my brain hasn’t quite kicked in yet. A job for coffee.

Today I’m grateful for:

The ten baht soft noodles, the twenty baht watermelon and 75 baht drinks I bought to go with dinner, a super spicy fish soup that sure woke up my face. And despite the morning coffees I never really got going today.

The best thing about today was:

That nothing really mattered too much. I got things done, chatted and prompted some students with their catch-up work etc and also this whilst feeling exhausted and lethargic. Pick it up and start again tomorrow.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Whilst I was sipping my coffee at Utopia I saw the lady from the phone store next door outside and remembered that I should get my phone screen replaced there, to give them my business. I went out and she said she could do it for me. My memory of having the protective screen replaced was that it cost about 100 baht. I was a little surprised when she said it was 250 baht. Has the price gone up that much? Did I remember wrong? Was she taking advantage? I don’t know so I thought of it as a random act of kindness that makes her happy and keeps me happy too.

Something I learned today?

I saw a BBC story about terrible things happening in North Korea. I didn’t watch the content but I’m now wondering if this is further preparation for war with China? The timing seems convenient.

What are some personality traits that I admire in others?

I was thinking that the personality traits I admire in others are not always something I feel comfortable to try and replicate. They are not always suitable for my personality today. If they are admirable then perhaps I can learn to slowly integrate them in my own way. It’s unreasonable to expect to immediately become the kind of person that another is. Also, some traits that I admire may be in people that I dislike for other traits that jar against mine. Separate the trait from the person.

Where did I embody courage?

I’ve been trying to answer this for a couple of days already but don’t feel like I’ve had to embody courage at all recently. Life has been pretty much within my stride for the last couple of years. I’ve embodied courage in my past, for example, when moving countries or going to visit new countries with little information, starting new careers and so on. I’m happy to keep exploring new possibilities but things that might require good chunks of courage are not really on my radar either because my level of fear has been defused or things are beyond my thoughts to attempt these days.

I took this picture because this nice piece of art was in Utopia. I like it.

Recognition – 12th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

What does your world feel like?
Is there still wonder in your eyes?
Do you recognise yourself anymore
When you hear the children’s cries?
Can you describe this moment
Even to yourself in thoughts?
Or are you too busy thinking
What may be in others’ reports?

Today I’m feeling:

Busy and positive. Even with only one class today I seemed to have little relaxed time though that’s not to say that it wasn’t enjoyable. I was at House most of the morning but filled that time with schoolwork and writing. I got back to school early and helped out a few students before class as well as getting some volleyball in with a mix of students I knew and others I didn’t. It was a lot of fun. Time ran away quickly.

Today I’m grateful for:

The lady in the next air con shop who I communicated with using translation and asked for a mechanic to come visit on Saturday if all goes well. I hope she doesn’t get scared off like the last shop.

The best thing about today was:

Watching one of my students, Goya, in Kru David’s class do really well at finding information within a text. David had been complaining about her before as her behaviour in class is not always attentive and he wasn’t convinced when I told him that she was quite clever at English. I was proud of her today.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Whilst I was talking to Amy on video call Tangmo and Tigger were suddenly fighting on the terrace. I got them apart and Tigger ran off with Tangmo chasing and barking. They ran all the way around the teaching room and back again until Tigger got himself up a tree. I was quite impressed as I’ve never seen Tig run and climb like that before. The old fat furball still has some energy in him.
I managed to drag/chase Tangmo out and close the gate before trying to coax Tig down from the tree. Eventually, I was able to get him down with help from the step ladder and he seemed to be ok though shocked and grumpy. Amy went off upset too but I reassured her that if there were any problems I’d take him straight to the vet.
He seems ok now it’s later in the evening but I’ll continue to keep a close eye on him. That was a bit of excitement I could do without. I’ll keep the gate closed more often again now. 

Something I learned today?

Apparently, China plans to build a military base in Cuba! Well, why not? China is surrounded by US military bases.

Who has had a significant impact on my life?

My mum, for being there; my dad, for not.
Bronwyn, for helping me gain confidence and to leave England.
TLJ, for being the kick in the ass I needed at the time.
Amy, for being able to share a life without letting compromise get in our way.
These are just very quick and minor thoughts, before bed.

I took this picture because cows were on the loose. This is just outside the school cafe.

Everyone’s A Stereotype – 9th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Entitled to an opinion?
Constantly talking shite
Does Everyman exist?
And what of his plight?
Doing the dishes again
Through lace curtain windows
Post-work pub crawl
Where good gossip flows
Ideas getting bashed out
From a giant ball of clay
Slowly returns to mud
With every word they say
Everyone a stereotype
Every opinion counted
Even in opposition
A culture war is mounted

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good but I can tell that I’m a little exhausted at the end of the week again. This day is weird. Teach first thing and then wait four hours to teach again. I can fill the time easily enough it’s just the up and down of the tension in my body.

Today I’m grateful for:

Mum’s soup again. I got home a bit late and I could see a storm coming. I wasn’t sure what I was going to eat and thought I could quickly dash to the market to find something. Just as I put my keys in my pocket after getting changed some rain came, not too much but it didn’t look like it was going to stop anytime soon. A quick double-check of the freezer and there waiting was Mum’s soup. Great. Adding salt, pepper, dried garlic, chilli in vinegar, crunchy dried gluten with dried chilli and kaffir lime leaves, defrosted and piping hot, it sure hit the spot.

The best thing about today was:

Being happy and contented at school so much that even after I finished my own class I joined another where I knew some students and helped them a little before bumping into other students all stopping for a chat or calling me over. There were some students from another school and I realised one was a girl (Gift) I met here a couple of years ago. I never taught her but she always wanted to talk with me when she saw me and slowly I got to know her and her friends. I didn’t know she’d moved schools and was now at the Technical College doing something related to cooking. Her English is still poor so I couldn’t get much more than that. She has a positive attitude though and should be able to do well for herself. It was good to catch up.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

The rhythm of the day has seen me run out of energy again and although I feel happy I also seem a little grumpy (to myself). Like not quite right. The buzz of the classes at the ends of the working day have made it feel like a very stop-start affair, almost two days in one but with no sleep between them.
Matt messaged me about a new restaurant near him and wondered if I might come over to check it out. My feeling is not to do anything this weekend, then I considered that I could go on Sunday but then pushed myself to go tomorrow instead. Sometimes I have to kick my own ass to get myself moving.
Amy also called from the Star Casino bar where she was having a great time drinking and dancing by herself, though enjoying the acquaintance of others there. For me though I was feeling a little annoyed at being called many times but I also realise that she misses me being there with her (even though I wouldn’t have likely been at that bar with her). I appreciate her happiness and enjoyment of her life and know that my mild annoyance is irrational. I need a sleep and I’m already thinking about tomorrow morning’s coffee!

Something I learned today?

I was listening to an interesting podcast with Peter Hessler whose books about China I have read or to read here (as well as his wife’s book Factory Girls). They left China in 2007 but a few years later after having twins decided to live in Cairo, Egypt just at the time of the violent colour revolution there. Besides that, what was interesting there was his discovery of the Chinese diaspora there, how they ended up there, how they became leading plastic recyclers or women’s lingerie sellers and the differences and appreciation of each other’s cultures.

When do I feel most alive?

At age 55 it definitely isn’t on Friday nights anymore! I suppose it would be at school being with my students, not necessarily teaching them but just chatting and understanding.
Back in Sydney, I remember talking with friends about my possible futures at the time and that I was thinking of becoming a barista (which I soon did) and perhaps an English teacher (which I eventually did). My friends said they thought that I would make a great teacher though I didn’t really know why they thought that. Maybe they could see something that I couldn’t. They didn’t imagine me as a barista though admittedly at the time barista was judged similarly to hipster.
When I think back even further I remember the time in Gosford in 1995 when Bronwyn and I got stoned and ended up at her friend’s youth club that night much to my dismay and initial reluctance and then after getting over my paranoia  (it’s not easy to get lost in thought surrounded by 100 teenagers in a room) having a memorable night of enjoyment that has stuck with me ever since.

I took this picture because this is the result of the plant/tree sap dripping on me the other day. It’s cleared up a bit now, after blistering a little in places but I expect it to stay red in places for maybe three or months and will get itchy in the next week or two. I should try and find out more information about what the plant actually is.

17th July 2023 – With my new iPhone I was able to use the Look Up function for the picture of the plant. It is Euphorbia tirucalli (known as Indian tree spurge, naked lady, pencil tree) and the latex sap is poisonous and can indeed cause temporary blindness!

How Do You Do, Bartholomew? – 3rd June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

In the battle between one god
And this supreme being’s two sets of believers
Each arguing that they were doing good
And that the others were purely deceivers

These good deeds involved massacring
Those that believed the same thing
Killing more of each other than those
That hated what some good deeds might bring

More than the Romans ever threw to the lions
Over the space of three hundred years
In just one day thousands lay dead
And the Pope rejoiced with glorious tears

The irony seems to be lost on some
When their books said to live and let live
Only humans could twist the words of their god
And make it part of their dogma to forgive

Inspired by a section of Sapiens by Yuval Noah Harari dealing with religion.
1st Apr 2024 – Submitted to My Vivid Blog

Today I’m feeling:

I’m zonked out today. I went to bed around one thirty last night and I knew I was dog tired but still felt like I was in a good mood and should be doing things. I knew it wasn’t the best idea though and fell asleep quickly in the end. I got up late this morning and felt pretty good but by about lunchtime, I was crashing. I just ran out of energy.

Today I’m grateful for:

Yes’s album Drama, which I listened through twice as I crashed out through the afternoon on the sofa. I drifted in and out of consciousness as did the music. At times it made me think of the 70s and 80s, the Old Grey Whistle Test and listening to John Peel late at night. I can’t recall any of the music, even just a couple of hours later but I know I enjoyed it. I’ll listen to it again soon.

The best thing about today was:

Getting into bed early and getting a message from my student Jet that she was having problems at home with her mum and stepdad. I tried to understand as best I could and gave her my support. Jet is a very funny, smart but lazy, tomboy that speaks her mind and has a lot of bravado but as with any kid around 12-15 has her own insecurities and hers is whether her parents love her.
Her mum and dad split a couple of years ago after her dad cheated and no doubt her mum was shocked and sad, and now with a new man living in the house there must be all sorts of conflicting emotions at play for everyone.
Sadly, a lot of kids are facing situations like this. I wonder if it is spurring on the popularity of lesbian relationships here. Girls are seeing how badly their mothers get treated and then forgive and remain subservient to men and they’re deciding that’s not what they want in their lives but they still want love.
Anyway, the reason this was the best thing that happened today was Jet’s response of ‘Thanks for listening, you’re the best teacher and I love you! ‘
That warmed my heart though I did remind her that I am not perfect either!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My energy levels, handled by sleep! I think I just get so exhausted during the week at school and whilst still buzzing on the Friday, it all comes crashing down on the weekend. That’s not to say I didn’t get anything done or feel down. I’ll bounce back.

Something I learned today?

Apparently, there was a report out of Cambridge University Press that China is no longer communist but runs a free market, controlled capitalist system and that at the same time, the USA is becoming an increasingly authoritarian system. In my lifetime the world has turned upside down but I still know where to stand.

What are some simple pleasures that bring me happiness?

Coffee. Is coffee simple enough? Maybe not but right now it is simple. Reading a good book that stimulates thought and memory. The smell of night jasmine. A clean shave. The soft ache of a post-workout body. The struggle of conversation in a second language.

I took this picture because this is Thailand. Dirty, dusty, hot, random, wild, beautiful.

Lemon Twist – 23rd May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

You can bitch about your bad luck
For that, it’s not your mistake
But don’t tell me about your problems
From the choices that you make

When you know the path to choose
But opt to follow all the glitter
Don’t be surprised your friends are gone
Leaving you twisted and bitter

10th Apr 2024 – Submitted to RDP Wednesday

Today I’m feeling:

Positive though a little tired. I need to get to sleep a little earlier I think. I was feeling a little dizzy and undernourished around lunchtime so bought a sandwich from 7/11 to keep me going. I did a full app ab workout this morning for the first time in about six months. I hope to keep that going.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Wow for offering to use her classroom for my last class of the day because the room we were supposed to be in was already in use. My students were later grateful to me when I let them go early as I finished all that I wanted to do with them and didn’t want to get into anything else.

The best thing about today was:

Meeting my second class of new students for this semester. We managed to get through a little set-up in preparation for the coming weeks.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I mentioned above about having a classroom double booked which was a little frustrating as it was the last two hours of the day and it was boiling hot. I was prepared to let the class have free time but then Kru Wow offered her room.

Something I learned today?

Countries that voted against a ban on killer robots – USA, UK, Israel and Australia. Their justification? China.
China banned certain components from US company Micron citing ‘national security’ concerns just as the US has done to Chinese companies. There does seem to be a little more to the story though, maybe even that the concerns are legitimate.
Testing is being carried out on the high-speed rail between Bandung and Jakarta and is due to open in June. The trains look fantastic.
I learned some stretches for my neck and shoulders.
I learned a little about my new class of grade 7 students. They seem to have a little more skill than the other new class but I’m hoping I can just teach them the same lessons.

What opportunities do I currently have in my life?

I think I have almost unlimited opportunities available to me. I still feel like I can do anything so long as my body and brain can withstand it. I suppose the main opportunity is for self-improvement and adapting to my life constantly changing.

I took this picture because this is the way out from the cafe next to the school. I park my car out here as it is easier for me to drive away on this road. I think our school is quite nice. The gardeners do a hell of a lot of work here.