The following is a letter from July 17, 2023, delivered today from the past
Dear FutureMe and FutureAmy,
Today is 17th July 2023 and Amy has just come back from Australia for one month and has whizzed around cleaning the house and getting it up to her standard of cleanliness.
Of course, she will have to clean it again when she comes back again in October!
Writing this today I feel quietly hopeful that Amy will be able to find herself again in Thailand. The onset of the pandemic at the end of 2019 really disrupted our plans to do some kind of business on our land or somewhere in Chiang Rai.
I think we all went a little stir-crazy being stuck at home so much, though for me I am quite comfortable sitting back and enjoying our little paradise.
I hope by the time this letter arrives that Amy hasn’t run off again to another part of the world in frustration. But whatever has happened I will support her. I have resolved to stay here and see out the lives of our cats and I am fine with that, whether Amy is here or not. Wherever she is in the world I can feel her with me. I want her to be happy.
When you receive this email it will be your birthday my little moo. I never know what to get you because I have already given you all that I have. Know that wherever you are, you have all my love.
Happy Birthday for another year, little Amy Love you, Shauny
Today I’m feeling:
A bit dusty after my first night of drinking this year. I fell asleep in my clothes last night, half expecting to be dragged up again. At some point, I must’ve undressed as I was naked when I got up at 10am with a whiskey mouth.
Today I’m grateful for:
The staff at La Favola who took care of us tonight for Amy’s birthday dinner. We had a great time, overloading on their buffet, especially the oysters.
The best thing about today was:
Besides late morning coffee and dinner, the rest of the day was mostly spent either sleeping or reading in bed.
The best thing was going out for a fancy dinner and having a good feeling of being together tonight.
Something I learned today?
The AFL usually quickly puts up videos of the last two minutes of very close games and I happened to see that there was one for the Swans game today which is a bad sign. Did we manage to scrape by or just lose? I’ll find out tomorrow.
Upbeat, positive and happy but a little tired (I think from blurred vision – or is my blurred vision from being tired?)
Today I’m grateful for:
The local weed shop being open today, splashing water on anyone passing by.
We now have two weed shops in the village!
The best thing about today was:
Dad’s larb pla for lunch, still hot from the pan and creating a perfect sweat for this heat.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I was actually looking forward to going to SanKong for an hour or so, knowing it would be a joyous occasion, everyone having fun in a communal free-for-all.
After lunch, I went and sat in the aircon as Amy, family and friends were making desserts. She said it would take a couple of hours and that was perfect. Once they’re done we can drive to SanKong, I can hang out for a bit before going home, leaving Amy to keep drinking with her friends.
I soon dozed off and not woken up again until 4.30 pm, a couple of hours later than expected. Amy was already into her wine and understood when I said I’d just go home directly as it was late afternoon now.
Something I learned today?
Yesterday there was a knife attack in Bondi Junction Westfield and five people were killed. It’s an odd feeling for something like this to happen in a place that I’m familiar with.
I took this picture because I was actually expecting to have a bunch of photos from Sankong’s Songkran celebration today but I didn’t make it and I have a sore neck.
Initially bright and energetic but then sleepy as I was driving to work. The first class went ok and kept me awake and then I almost fell asleep at the dentist’s. Looking forward to sleep tonight for sure! I wonder if I will still be sleepy then though.
Today I’m grateful for:
The dentist, for giving me a 10% discount, letting me pay $6000 baht today and the rest next month and then giving me 4 free gumbrushes. My gums are sore now though.
Today she cut down two of my teeth to make temporary crowns and a temporary bridge.
Next appointment I will get the permanent bridge and then think about all the other fucked up things about my old teeth that need fixing.
The best thing about today was:
I repeated one of my lessons from yesterday with the other grade 7 class and whilst not quite as successful due to their poorer skills it still went well so I was happy with that.
Then spending some time with my old students (see below) was a lot of fun and it’s sometimes nice to not have the pressure of being the main teacher and can just try to experiment with styles of teaching or make learning fun for one or two students without having to manage the whole class.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Spending so much time at the dentist meant having to scoff two coffees down (just using one side of my mouth) and no time for reading, writing or preparing new lessons. Getting my teeth sorted was quite a pressing need though.
Something I learned today?
The UK is in actual recession as their economy shrank 0.3% in the last quarter.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
As I was lying in the dentist’s chair I was wondering if I would be ok for my afternoon class.
I was still inspired to get back though and rushed back, grabbed everything I needed and despite getting distracted by many students walking to building ten, I was only a couple of minutes late. However, when I got there, there were only a handful of students and they were sitting on the floor playing Uno.
They told me that most of the class were doing some singing and dancing competition this afternoon (which I had heard going on in our building) so I settled in and played a round of Uno with those who were there.
After that, I decided that I would go and help Kru Ren, who was teaching my old students from last year.
I get on well with all of them and after asking Kru Ren’s permission I helped many students to create a dialogue. They were all very reluctant because Kru Ren isn’t strict with them but as I bounced around the room playing, helping and inspiring he got himself involved too.
I see the Thai teachers just assigning work and hoping that some of the kids do it. I don’t blame them because of the extra tasks that they get given but it’s not something that I am very comfortable doing unless I’m tired myself and want to step off the gas a little.
What is a defining moment of my life?
I think I’ve answered this before. I could easily point to my two immigrant moves, from the UK to Australia and then from Australia to Thailand. I could point to any of my three marriages or the special time with TLJ. Travelling to China, to Malaysia and Singapore.
But probably the most defining moment was something that I wasn’t even aware of and that was my dad dying when I was just 18 months old. I can’t even say how this was a defining moment and even as I’m writing this I’m wondering if it even was. Does it define me? I don’t feel like I can even be defined by a single moment so perhaps all of the above apply? I thought about this moment of my dad dying because my life would have been totally different if that event hadn’t happened.
Sarah (at front) took this picture because she is always trying to snatch my phone out of my pocket and today she succeeded. I knew she took it but I was busy talking with other students. I couldn’t find her for about five minutes and was expecting 1000 photos by the time I got my phone back. Fortunately, there weren’t too many and among the predictable shots of the floor and ceiling, I thought this one was quite nice. Sarah and her accomplice, Iphone.
When you are walking towards your maker Be prepared with the biggest machine gun Point it right between their eyes And ask them first, ‘What have I done?’
Ask your questions, demanding proof Let there be no pulling of the leg Your maker may only pronounce the truth ‘What came first, the chicken or the egg?’
Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good but a little tired despite sleeping quite well.
I can feel my muscles aching from the exercising that I’ve been doing. Not just aching but feels like them splitting and dividing under my skin. It’s a tolerable pain that indicates growth, at least to my monkey brain. It doesn’t feel like an injury though my right shoulder is still definitely injured. I need to find some exercises where I can still use my arms and chest without injuring the shoulder further. I adapted my normal arms workout this morning to compensate and that went ok.
Today I’m grateful for:
Bronwyn sending me some old photos of me, my mum and my dad. These are pictures that my mum had and I had seen from time to time in my youth.
They were passed onto Bronwyn to leave for Hayden in the future but I’m glad to see them again.
I also found out that there was a book that my mum wrote quotes and poetry in and I’m interested to see that at some point.
The best thing about today was:
Teaching the new grade 10 class and describing what would happen in real life if they failed to do the work that they are employed to do, just as some students did last week for my class work when I wasn’t there and assigned them something to do in my absence.
I described our classroom as the place of employment, myself as the boss and them as the employees. I showed them on the board that I was promoting some of my employees and demoting others and that in our classroom this would be indicated by grades.
Everyone started at grade 2 (in the middle) but the students who did my work are now at grade 3 whilst those that didn’t are now at grade 1. This certainly got everyone’s attention. I told them that in a real-life work situation, they would likely no longer have a job!
I really enjoyed explaining this and I could see the satisfaction on the newly promoted students faces. All they had to do was what was asked and they’ve been rewarded. I feel like there was some real learning happening and it made me happy to see. I kept the mood light throughout all this but they understood the ramifications of their actions.
In the second act of synchronicity for the day, I read this in an online newsletter and messaged the class to discuss its meaning:
“’I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday’”
Even writing this is making me feel somewhat smug! Haha.
Something I learned today?
There’s an ant species that’s unique to New York City, known as the ManhattAnt.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I’ve been trying to get Baipad to describe her own personality to me because she described her cousin’s personality as similar to her own but she could only answer with ‘you already know.’ I tried to explain that we see ourselves differently from how others see us.
This morning I sat down with her and Jan, with Apple sitting opposite and I said, ‘Come on, let’s play a game. Here’s a list of adjectives, pick ten that describe Apple and we had fun doing that for ten minutes. As I left I told them that tomorrow we will do the same for Jan. And at the weekend I will ask Baipad again to see if she can answer for herself.
I sat with one of my poor grade 7 students (Nut) in class this morning and helped her a lot with trying to understand the text we were reading and how to answer the questions. Some days she is ok to accept my help and today was one of those. When I went to help others she pulled me back to finishing helping her first. I was glad to see this and I think she was glad of my help. She will never be a great English speaker but she is doing all that I ask of her.
I sent a message to JubJib reminding her that perfection is a myth. She happily admits to requiring perfection from herself.
What do I need to embrace about myself?
I’ve become more accepting of my own foibles as I’ve aged. As a sign of maturity, I don’t tend to do things that I wish I hadn’t any more. I’m equating embracing and acceptance here but they feel quite comparable at this age. I am happy with myself and understand myself very well. I know my weaknesses and attempt to improve them slowly without punishing myself.
Where do I hope to be one year from now?
This is an interesting question for me this time as I feel a little in limbo. I am very happy where I am but also considering where do I go from here?
I could quite comfortably maintain my life the way it is. I have no real goals to aim for these days, just continuous improvement. This feels possible due to stability and not having to deal with other stresses that come with the pursuit of new things.
In this way, I’m quite happy to defer to Amy’s ideas about what she wants in the future. That may be a big shock when it comes time for action though, this I know.
Should I have a specific goal for this coming year? I don’t feel particularly ambitious.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 5. Exercise Daily. I didn’t get this until recently. A healthy body is where you have to start everything in life. If you can’t build a healthy and strong body, what CAN you build in life?
I was quite athletic as a child, particularly loving football but once I discovered booze and cigarettes that all slowly went downhill.
Since finally being mostly free of those vices I have started exercising and by doing it first thing in the morning I’ve been able to slowly introduce and lengthen the time spent doing it as I also slowly started to feel the benefits.
Previously I would consistently make the mistake of overdoing the exercise when I would feel the need to get back into it. It’s a mistake probably 80% of us make.
But as I was reading more about developing habits and starting small and as I’ve been teaching my kids about doing things little by little, that idea has slowly slipped into my own brain to find a better way.
Perhaps when I was younger I didn’t want to admit that I was aging. As it took many years to develop this beer belly I’ve accepted that it will take many years to lose it too.
Again, as synchronicity goes, I also just read this:
“The key to exercising regularly, losing weight, being more productive, and achieving success is understanding how habits work.” – Charles Duhigg
I took this picture last week because I was fascinated by the symmetry of this freshly sprouted pineapple. No new pictures today.
What is to be done once at the mountaintop? Once having surveyed the delights to be seen Can you shout into the valleys till the echoes stop? Telling all who care to wonder where you’ve been
Counting the cost when the afternoon storm arrives There’s no magic lantern to wish you safe and sound Darwin showed us that the smartest one survives Keeping their heads down back home on the ground
Exhausted! But happily so. I had a disrupted sleep with having to deal with the results of the spicy seafood sauce from last night as it got stuck straight into my bowels!
But I got up easily and quickly at 6.30 and we set off biking again soon after. We took a very dodgy detour that took us so far into the unknown, wondering if we’d ever make it back.
In a tiny village tucked in between cornrow hills, an old Auntie and uncle, who seemed a little unaccustomed to Thai, and even more so to two dirty farangs emerging through their dog-infested dirt tracks, helped stave off some thirst and hunger with a grocery of delights hidden in a shack underneath reams of old corrugated iron but do be sure to take off your shoes! Nervous dogs sniffed nervously, on the constant scavenge.
It felt like we were making good time but a breakdown in here would’ve consumed the rest of the day and it wasn’t even 8am yet.
Already shaken from intermittent dodgy rocky roads, it dawned that there was another hour and a half of this ahead!
In most part beautiful but also at times frustratingly shaky, I prayed little Fino could hold itself together.
Today I’m grateful for:
Little Fino performing, as one would reasonably expect any modern piece of expensive motoring machinery, magnificently despite the abuse I brought forth on it over the last two days. I would not be surprised if he sounds a bit cranky in the morning.
The best thing about today was:
Getting to Chiang Rai and familiar surroundings was a welcome feeling. At least if something went wrong here I had some idea of where to head for help.
After our morning wilderness adventure, I told Bruno there was no need to wait for me and we made our way separately North from Lampang.
I took some minor detours and when back into recognisable territory I decided to follow the Mae Lao klong (which was sublime) up past Singha Park and then back off the highway after following cute girls on what must have been their boyfriend’s souped-up motorbikes, that popped so loudly as they flew past fuel tankers whilst desperately clasping their phones in one hand.
Past the prison and up into Mae Yao through the back of Bandu and the university and delivered, finally, to my first coffee of the day back at home in Utopia! That coffee was the best ever!
It was already 2 pm and my ears were still full of wind, my hands shaking from hours of gripping the handlebars, and my eyes and clothes full of smoke and dust. It felt so good to be back home!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Lots of things were out of my control today and I happily went along with everything. I’m pretty easy to please.
Something I learned today?
The ACTUAL axis of evil seems to be the USA, Zionists and…… well, an axis only needs two, doesn’t it?
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Spending a few baht in a village shop to give the locals some income, though I think Bruno actually paid!
In another village where Bruno stopped to stuff himself with som tum, the family there were so tickled to be serving a couple of ‘crackers’ and we happily obliged them with photos, which I hope they print out and put up one day to fade in the dust and sun of posterity.
If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
The way I was raised was fine, even great. The circumstances could have been different though. However, because my father died before I even knew him I never knew what it was like to have and lose him. I wonder how much impact that has had on my personality and life in general?
My mum was very liberal with me and I got to make plenty of my own mistakes. I grew up slowly. Like most teenagers, I thought I knew everything and I could fake being mature. My mum generally left me to it.
I took this picture because this is what we spent three hours traversing the back end of beyond to come and see. An emerald lagoon in a sinkhole in the jungle mountains near Lampang. The fish in there are huge and we wondered how they got there. Signs for no swimming, fishing or feeding the fish. There’s nothing else here except for a couple of big trees and once you’ve looked up and then back down again, you’ve seen a big tree. For some reason, the car park seemed to be able to accommodate a fleet of tour buses yet it’s at the end of a dirt track that a tour bus wouldn’t be able to navigate. The shop was on the far side of the car park so when we arrived a lady jumped on her motorbike and came to a makeshift stall next to the lagoon entrance, we happily wandered by on both entry, and fifteen minutes later on exit, and she happily rode her bike back across the car park to the shop. It was only 10 am. Maybe busloads of Koreans swamp the place come the afternoons?
A little tense as there is a lot of running around today. First to the city to walk Leo, then Mae Sai immigration where we have just home from. Right now I’m ready to scoff some lunch before dashing back to school for my afternoon classes.
Today I’m grateful for:
Officer Oh at Mae Sai immigration. This was my first visit there and all the staff seemed far more friendly than in Chiang Rai. It’s a bit of a long way to go each time but hopefully the experience will be better.
The best thing about today was:
Getting my visa application in and hopefully having that finalised within the next three weeks.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Being out of my class this morning was a little difficult as I tried to monitor everything from the work they were sending me in their messages.
About ten students didn’t submit anything and later in the day I deducted points in the system.
It was then found that I had gotten two students mixed up and needed to add their points back but then finding that I can only deduct points and not add them! I want to get that fixed because I want to reward students too.
Something I learned today?
More than 87% of Palestinian deaths caused by Israel in the last 51 days are civilian. The highest ratio of civilian to combatant deaths in any war ever and by a long way.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Last night I made the choice to get up early and go with Amy to walk Leo but when we arrived this morning we found that her dad had already taken him. Everyone has been telling him to take it easy and he only finished his second round of chemo yesterday but he is obviously frustrated at not being able to do all the things he wants to do. As the brief thought went through my mind of wasted time and wasted petrol, I pushed it aside and prepared for the next step of driving us to Mae Sai.
I messaged Manow hoping that she recovers from her cold soon.
I apologised to Pin and Gam as I accidentally deducted points from them in the SchoolBright system. They were both gracious in return.
As a few of my final class wanted to go off early to sports practice I made a deal with them to help them get through the work quicker.
After going to Immigration in Mae Sai Amy wanted to go to the markets. I didn’t really want to buy anything myself but happily went along with her as it felt like we had enough time. We bought some roasted chestnuts and noodles for her mum and dad and I was tasked with delivering them before getting back to school. It was a bit of a rush but I got it done.
What emotions do I feel most often?
I’ve become much more emotionally stable over the last couple of years and the emotion I notice more often these days is joy. There are times when I just have a feeling of inner peace and happiness.
Other emotions such as stress, tension and anxiety seem to occur often enough but register less. Depression is almost gone completely.
I took this picture last night because I wanted to capture what we had setup for Loy Kratong in the driveway. No new pictures today.
It’s a labour of love, not big dreams But about what being human means Sticking a dollar in the cup, passing through This is all a gift from me to you And back again, that’s our reflection Open to each other’s introspection In for a penny, in for a pound Let’s pass the bucket of life around
Today I’m feeling:
A good vibe. This morning is not too hot. I lazily prepared for the day by rolling back and forth in bed due to stiffness finally getting up and mosying along to Utopia for a delicious throat-soothing coffee. Art told me about his ride to Doi Ang Chang and it looks like a great ride so I messaged Bruno to plan to go there next weekend.
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy’s dad feeling good enough to come out to Central and eat at the seafood restaurant there, where we treated him for his birthday, Amy’s mum for selling her apartments and Nong Aun (Amy’s brother’s girlfriend) for getting a job as a teacher here.
The best thing about today was:
The first coffee was pretty spot on. Meeting Baipad’s mum, sister and three super cute cats was fun.
The fish speciality at Laem Charoen was delicious for lunch. The afternoon and evening are a relaxing chill-out. It’s been a good day.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
My sore throat was getting me down a little at times today but I finally got to rest a little for an hour or so after lunch and it’s improved a little since taking some medicine. I dealt with it by soldiering on and despite feeling a little grumpy I don’t think it showed that much.
Something I learned today?
A theory behind renewed conflict in the Middle East is to cut off oil to China. A terrorist attack is said to be rumoured on US soil that will trigger them into war with Iran.
This whole ridiculous idea seems more likely every day. The US is putting all its pieces into play in preparation. The US is isolating itself more and more from the rest of the world and the rest of the world is looking forward to its downfall.
Whilst people were scoffing at the idea of the end of the Empire last year, this view is now going mainstream.
What’s on my mind right now?
This morning I will go and meet my student Baipad and her mum to introduce myself as her teacher. She lives in our village and since opening up to me about her struggles with being bullied in primary school and her father passing away a few years ago I’ve tried to encourage and support her. As she lives close by I suggested that once a week I can bring her home from school and hopefully introduce her to Amy so she can pick up on some confidence-building skills and keep up her English, which she is pretty good at in general.
I took this picture this morning because this oversized asparagus-looking plant is so big that I had to wide angle the shot to get it all in the picture. The multiple mini flowers are cute though not the spectacle-worthy of a stalk growth of this size.
Where the waters glisten night and day With all the pearls of wisdom on display There’s a bridge over untroubled waves That draws the diamonds a gambler craves
Awash with stories, a rain with dice There are twenty floors of a winner’s advice A promise of the life richly deserved Park your dreams in the spot reserved
Pearly smiles are this devil’s greeting The chase of the highs is forever fleeting One more roll, one more spin or turn The future is no longer of concern From the shore or dreams, ships depart Into the mists of the broken heart
Today I’m feeling:
A little anxious about all the things that need to be done when we get back home but also thankful that home is there waiting for me.
(Later) Amy was straight into cleaning mode so I dashed out for coffee revival at Utopia. Once back home though I got sucked into the whirlwind.
Today I’m grateful for:
The hotel staff who helped us in the morning, the taxi driver who told us about his BYD electric car, the Thai Smile check-in staff who was very helpful with our bags, the airport staff we interacted with, the pilots for flying us home, the cabin crew who gave us a snack and water, Aing for picking us up at the airport on time, Now for washing the car (badly but I appreciate the effort), Art for a great first coffee home, the seller for his fish for our dinner. All the people in and out of my space that didn’t kill me today.
The best thing about today was:
Feeling positive and content despite all our running around. Getting back to our home was a little strange for a moment but when I jumped on the bike to go to Utopia I suddenly felt free again.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Aing and Now had two friends staying over and asked if they could stay for a couple more days. For me, it doesn’t really matter as we are still busy running around and Amy didn’t have any problem either except when we met them they didn’t say anything except hello. Amy was upset about that and I tried to rationalise it away. It’s pretty Thai style but still…
Also, despite us just getting back we had to drive into the city for dinner at Amy’s parents as her brother was here for the weekend and flies back early in the morning. It was literally, drive there, eat and drive back!
Something I learned today?
I caught up with all my Substack reading over the last couple of days so lots of stuff went into my eyes and possibly made it to my brain. I think I read one article twice without even realising it. Anyway, one thing that I do recall is a breakthrough in quantum computing. I don’t understand exactly what the machine was doing but the computation took one-millionth of a second whereas it was estimated it would take our current fastest supercomputer ten billion years to complete! That’s outrageous! But will it be useful? Time will tell.
What’s my earliest childhood memory?
I’ve answered this before and I’m a little curious if I would say the same thing now. It must be something from living in Bransty, Whitehaven. I have quite a few memories from there but can’t quite put them in order. The most important memory is from when I was 4 years old (and I even wonder now if that’s right but I’ve made it that age over the times I’ve recalled it) and crying because I didn’t want to die. I assume this may have been triggered by talking to my mum about why I didn’t have a father like other kids. Learning about death is pretty traumatic for a four-year-old.
I took this picture because I’m back home and our giant asparagus plant thing is about to do something. I don’t recall there being amazing flowers but it’s obviously part of its reproduction cycle. The other one that grew before hasn’t flowered again since it did back three or four years ago.
I wonder what the nineties were like Listening to Radiohead, Oasis and Blur Before technologies stole all the time away And endless scrolling would not occur
I wonder what the eighties were like When heavy metal was at its height Emo was still scribbles in teenage diaries And grunge was preparing to take flight
I wonder what the seventies were like With spiky hair fighting patchouli oils A changing of the guard was in motion And knives were out for the spoils
The turning of Kerouac, Tolstoy or Woolf Found good indie kids expanding their minds Without the shots of adrenaline This type of adventure usually finds
So today, in all the libraries sat Good indie kids write their poetry and prose Listening to the music of their forebears Searching for the truth and where it goes
Better than expected. Yesterday my energy kept increasing after the slow stumbling start and I didn’t feel like a nap and was expecting to be tired at bedtime but instead still felt awake and enjoyed watching TV and reading. Before midnight I turned out the light but struggled to slow my mind down before finally falling asleep for what must have been less than six hours rest, and even then waking up a little before my alarm went off. I talked myself into exercise, something which is becoming easier each day (each working day at least) and still appreciative and inspired by the slowly changing form I see in the mirror.
Today I’m grateful for:
Meeting Fah and Gafile who are my old students and in grade 10 now. They told me they were worried about an English exam that they had today. As I was doing my own Thai language study tonight I remembered about their exams and sent them a message to see how they did. They didn’t do so well so they know that they need to improve. I’m grateful that they are still always happy to see me and despite struggling in my classes too, they wish that I was still teaching them.
The best thing about today was:
Seeing Amy’s dad looking good after his operation. He was in pain but was fairly cheerful and already able to walk himself to the bathroom. His doctor is hoping that from what they saw during the operation that he won’t need any chemo. He should know by Friday.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
My one class today were in a playful mood and I let them loose a little, though still asking them to answer a few questions which made them think. I plan to ask them the same questions in each class this week and hope to see some improvement in their thinking during that time. But I’m also not taking it too seriously either.
Something I learned today?
Through asking my students what they learned today they told me that in their science class, they learned about India sending a spacecraft to the moon. Chandrayaan-3 was the first successful landing at the lunar south pole.
I like that students learned about this and maybe don’t know so much about previous achievements by the USA and USSR. It reminds me that the stories children are presented with deeply affect their thoughts about the world.
What is within my control right now?
Whether I should let Cap in the door or not. Whether I should turn the aircon down and go to the kitchen to get a soda water. When I eat and what time I go to bed. Whether I play guitar or watch TV or both. To decide if I have written enough here. Whether I’m tired and happy or tired and grumpy.
Many day-to-day minor events are within my control. Almost anything else is outside my control.
I took this picture because whilst visiting Amy’s dad in the hospital I took advantage of being in one of the tallest buildings in the city. Chiang Rai hasn’t gotten to the point of skyscrapers everywhere and I’m not sure it ever will. I was on the sixth (out of seven) floor and I seem to remember one of the hotels having ten floors but apart from those I don’t think there are any other buildings above four floors in the city.
When the sweetest words are whispered With sincerity and connection Dreams inspire more dreams To bring light, hope and meaning A little sunshine that beams on the floor Not only warms the feet But comforts the heart with it To counter my own rainy days
Today I’m feeling:
Very positive and happy. By around midday, I was that kind of happy tired, a little delirious, meditative and relaxed. I am starting to feel the wind-down myself now though I still can’t really fathom that in a couple more weeks I’ll be heading to Australia.
Today I’m grateful for:
The guy at the market who sells puff pastries with durian cream. He hadn’t made any when I got there last week and I was hankering for it since then. I also saw the stall selling fish and rice that I wanted to try but had already bought salad for dinner. I have to remember to try it next week.
The best thing about today was:
All the good conversations with students in and out of my classes. One in particular with Jee about how poorly paid Thai government workers are and another with JubJib where she was riffing on this story that she was making up about all her classmates and what their characters would be like in her story. She asked me what her character should be like and I said she should be the opposite of how she is in real life so she should be tough and mean, wear leather jackets and like to fight. I could see her mind whirling with this idea, she seemed to like that.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Amy is getting more concerned about her mum who is shouldering all the responsibilities for all the sick people in the family and has lost five kilos in a week what with running around, stressing and not sleeping and eating properly. Dad goes into hospital for his operation tomorrow and hopefully that all goes smoothly but at the same time Grandmum is not speaking or eating at the moment and may deteriorate quickly. So even if our plans continue with me going to Australia, the feeling may not be of excitement and pleasure.
Something I learned today?
Today is Hayden’s birthday (27? Is that right!? Crazy!) and he went for Korean BBQ with his mum, friend and girlfriend. She sent me a couple of pictures so today I learned what my son’s girlfriend looks like. He hasn’t told me much about her but I hope she is a positive influence for him.
What went well today?
Despite having frustrating issues trying to get a projector working in my first class and all the students wanting free time (which I refused!) we slowly and deliberately did some listening exercises and even though it took them more than an hour to listen and write two minutes of conversation we did it with little stress and in a relaxed way and Jee, in particular, said she found this work difficult but enjoyed it and wanted to do it more because she knew that there are not many opportunities to practice like this.
I took this picture because yesterday there were posts on the university’s Facebook page from students asking about this friendly dog that turned up outside Lotus’s and the market along with pictures that I easily recognised as Tangmo. The posts were around 2 pm yesterday but I remembered that he came to see me when I got home at 4.30 so he had obviously found his way back home in the meantime. The biggest worry about it though is that the highway is usually very busy and Tangmo isn’t the smartest and most aware dog in the world but he had somehow managed to navigate his way to the other side and back. I took this picture to send to Amy to show that he was still ok but typically he can’t walk more than a few metres before stopping to scratch or munch on an itchy back as he’s doing here. I’ve also been teaching him to keep a snack on his nose before he’s allowed to eat it. I think he might be able to do it one day.
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