Tag: DIY punk

Three Nights – 15th June 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

It can’t come quick enough
I’m made of impatient stuff
It was 24 hours of tough
Yesterday

Arrived without knowing
Reality rapidly going
It’s a wild wind blowing
Today

Next up, what’s in store?
Is it worth waiting for?
I can’t wait to explore
Tomorrow

Submitted to Ovi Challenge – tomorrow and Weekly Prompts Wednesday Challenge – Impatience. Title borrowed from Black Flag.
27th Nov 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – patience

Today I’m feeling:

Tired but awake with a headache. My sleep was much disturbed by aches in my shoulders and arms due to my exercise this week, so I skipped it this morning.

I have a few things to do today connected with the SpeechOdd Malay tour and the Minnesota release and hopefully will play some guitar too. I didn’t make it to my room often last week.

Today I’m grateful for:

My village and the folks therein.

The best thing about today was:

Being able to keep going after a filling lunch and resisting the temptation to lay down.  Before that, I had already gone to Sinthanee and got a new battery for the bike and picked up the fish at Betagro for Amy to cook for lunch.  My two morning coffees seemed to keep the lights on in my body after waking up tired but not sleepy.

Lunch could have finished me off, though.  My eyes were feeling heavy as my body was breaking down the fish and rice.  I drank a bottle of soda and knew it was a bad idea to lie down with all that bubbling around inside me so decided to walk around the garden and on seeing our dirty car I decided that I could take it to the garage to be cleaned as we will drive to meet Mei and Hagen at Singha Park tomorrow for lunch.

Also, I thought it might be a funny catalyst for some rain as it hasn’t rained in the four days since we got the gutter replaced, so we still don’t know how effective it is.

On the way to PTT, where I normally get the car cleaned, I dropped into Utopia and asked if they knew a local shop that could fix the puncture on my car, and they told me that Art recommended the shop right next to the PTT.  Easy.  And I picked up another coffee, too!

At the PTT, they couldn’t clean my car immediately as there was a truck delivering fuel, and they said they could only do it after that had finished.  No problem, I’ll go and get the puncture repaired.

In the shop the guy there got straight to it and within about ten minutes had fixed everything and delivered me a screw that had caused the problem.  And only cost 150 baht.  The fish this morning was more expensive!

As it was so quick, I went back down to the car cleaning place next door to Sinthanee, and they said it would be about an hour as they had a couple of cars in already.  No problem. I could go across the road and talk with Baipad for a bit.

At Baipad’s, her mum was finishing off a customer’s hair, and NamHom was playing an online game and talking with the other player, her friend, on her mobile phone.  Kids these days!  So lucky.  Her mum kept telling her to go and get Baipad from upstairs, but she was too engrossed, so I watched her playing and scoffed when she failed at the quest she was trying to complete, which, to my surprise, she was completely unbothered by; she just kept starting again without complaint.  I would have thrown the phone down in frustration many times if that had been me when I was younger!  So, I’m not sure how I feel about that.  Is she not frustrated due to resilience or to a lack of emotion?

Anyway, the customer left, and mum forced NamHom to go up and get Baipad, and I asked her mum if it was her car outside and if she would like me to teach Baipad all the things inside, without actually driving anywhere.  She said that that was fine but that Baipad was probably too scared to drive anyway and shook her head.  I think she would like Baipad to step up a little bit with taking action.

And so talking of which, NamHom came back downstairs and started playing again, saying that she knocked on the door and told Baipad to come down.  20 minutes later, and no appearance.  Her mum said that she was probably playing on her phone all last night and was still sleeping now and had locked her door.

She sighed, I sighed, but whatever.  I walked up to Lotus and got some Curcumin drinks and went back to the car wash and sat in their waiting room from where I called and chatted with Hayden for a while.

Once the car was done, outside, inside, underneath and another 250 baht gone I felt pretty lively and inspired to keep going so, once home, got into my room and sent off a message to Unite Asia about the Speech Odd tour, wrote to Johnny in HK about the Bennu 12”s and whether he’d be interested in the Minnesota Pocket Circuit release.  I also set up a Facebook event page for the Speech Odd tour and started to feel like I was really getting connected back in with things.

I was tired and dizzy but inspired again.  I practiced guitar for a little while and then played along to a couple of songs until my amp cut out from playing too loud.  Time to go back inside and relax.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I was unfazed about things today, even Amy telling me to do this and do that, I looked at her with a fun mocking face.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I told the puncture repair guy that Art at Utopia had recommended him so that they both got some recognition within our community.

Day 8 and eyes open

Subterranean – 5th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 15 Comments

Like Jack, I ran quickly from my dreams
Eager to discover what it all means
In the moment, exploring the themes
Is anything at all what it seems?
– Put it down on paper
– To review this endless caper

I found a box and put time inside

Was it living or was it writing?
It’s only myself that I’m fighting
A jazz dance in the underlighting
Each pair of eyes met, newly smitten
Fresh fruit waiting to be bitten
Another story begging to be written
– Late nights spent on the town
– Running home to get it down

I found a box and put time inside

And when I meet my future me
I’ll open the box to look and see
Words pressed, sentimental free
Whether tragedy or victory
– Presented here from me to you
– A diary of everything I do

I found a box and put time inside

Submitted to No Theme Thursday and dVerse Meeting The Bar (bop poem)
Inspired by the movie The Subterreans, based on the Jack Kerouac novel of the same name, where one of Jack’s girlfriends criticises him for always running off to go and write about the events of the night whilst he could have stayed and enjoyed more adventures. For some reason, this interaction always stuck with me.
Either way, WordPress provides a box of time for our future selves.

Today I’m feeling:

Anxious this morning. I woke up well before my alarm thinking about going to Bangkok and preparing for school next week.

Starting to relax a bit as I wait for the plane as I leave control to others for an hour or so until landing again.

Today I’m grateful for:

The crazy mixed-up rail options in Bangkok for helping learn more about getting around and gauging travel times. It’s also helped me achieve 10,000 steps easily.

The best thing about today was:

Meeting old friends and new ones at the show tonight.  First Nampan and Pam from SpeechOdd. 

Then Team, who is a young uni student that contacted me last week trying to make connections to put together a screamo band. Later, another young guy called Poom bought some screamo from me so I introduced them to each other.

Of course, I met Arwith and his bandmates in Piri Ries.

I met Sano-san from Low Fat again and exchanged CDs. 

I briefly talked with Fern who is the owner of the venue.

Nampan introduced me to the High Voltage folks.

I also met one of the guys from ADxHD (Korea) who also plays in Struggle Session (China).

Another guy came up to me and asked if I was Shaun and if I remembered him? It was Sasha from Russia! I met him about nine years ago in Kuala Lumpur when we were both staying with Kimi!

It is a little sad to think how small our world is because it feels like there are so few of us interested in this music. But it is amazing to bump into random connections anywhere in the world.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Just my sweat. Thankfully I bought an extra pair of clothes as I was expecting this.

Something I learned today?

Coming from Don Muang, don’t get off the train at Chatuchak for Chatuchak market! Even the nearest station at Bang Sue is a fair walk.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I left some stock free of charge at Heaven and Hell. Poowanat gifted me a CD in return.

I sold some merch at a discounted price at the show and also gifted the venue the Trumans Water and Flesh Narc CDs.

I took this picture because I finally got to see SpeechOdd play.

Roll Another Number – 27th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Everyone is so cynical
Opinionated, clinical
Fallen from the pinnacle
And waiting to expire

We’re all gonna die, what’s the point?
Who cares who the kings may anoint?
Sing a song, smoke another joint
Around the old campfire

Written for Ovi’s Challenge – Negativity. Titled borrowed from Nuisance.

Today I’m feeling:

Better but still tired out.  I took it easy with my first class but I was still exhausted by the end of it.  No exercise this morning either so that is now five days without.  I will try to do it tomorrow.  I usually feel better in the evenings than in the mornings though.  Let’s see.

Today I’m grateful for:

My former self of last week for planning ahead and quickly making up some cards for a quick vocabulary game with my grade 10s.  I wasn’t sure exactly how I was going to incorporate it in the class but I figured out a way to make it fun and engaging for everyone.

The best thing about today was:

Gradually getting my mojo back during the day and being able to not push myself or the students too much to stress ourselves out.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

With half of my grade 7 classes missing this week I’ve had to adapt myself to just playing Kahoots about the topic that we were on and making it as fun as possible whilst not putting any pressure on about punctuality and paying complete attention.

Something I learned today?

I forced myself to listen through a podcast of a couple of North American China Hawks discussing what the best way forward was for the USA to deal with China.

It reminded me that at the highest levels of Western governments, people cling to their ideology without growth or learning.  Some of the commentary had me contemplating just skipping it but I wanted to hear more opposition to the things I believe and to try to understand where some people are coming from.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Anchan skipped my class today to prepare for a national (I think) competition for a speech in Thai.  She sent me a message to say why she wasn’t there and I wished her the best.

She also reminded me it was her birthday today and so I bought some sweet snacks for her and her friends.  They were so cheap that there were so many of them that when I got back to school and my next class, Nemo said that it was her birthday too and so I gave her one pack.

I later tracked Anchan down in another building and gave her the rest of the snacks.  She laughed because there were so many but appreciated them too.  Whilst I was there, many students wished her a happy birthday and I was surprised by all the people who knew her.

I can understand her popularity though.  She is a smart kid who, in my own class, I have seen make friends with almost everyone, investing time in them (and calling out ones that treat others badly).  I warned her once last year not to get dragged into the bad crowd and whether she heeded that or not, she worked out what was best and was still able to maintain friendships with them.  I could sense what she was capable of and she has even surprised me with her skills.  Except English!

I also offered to teach Baipad, along with Apple and Jan, during the holidays if they wished.  I know that this will be a struggle to get them to commit to but also maybe get them to see that this is free education that they are being offered.  It would also give me something else to do apart from playing XBOX for four weeks straight!

Who would I like to reconnect with? 

In some ways, I’d like to reconnect with my school friends just to get memories and stories from them from when we were at school.  It’s kind of interesting to discover what ever happened to everyone but at the same time, I don’t care that much either.  That seems weird to write down but I’ve lived almost forty years without knowing what happened to everyone it just doesn’t seem that relevant.

I always want to connect with people in the DIY punk scene in South East Asia though and would love to find another kindred spirit in the same way that Kimi was.  Parthiban in Singapore is the nearest I have but we’ve only been able to hang out one time previously.

I should also reconnect with folks in Australia, which I do do from time to time but I’m thinking I should chat with Swerve again as we spent a lot of time working on things in the late 00’s and had a lot of fun.  There are also plenty of bands that I’ve worked with that I don’t have much contact with these days too.  I should get back to that.

I took this picture at 7.14 am just as I was about to leave this morning. I was surprised to see clouds on the horizon and I shot this at the very first peak of the sun rising above them.

The Rush – 4th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The race never existed in his world
To hurry something somehow seemed wrong
Never a challenge externalised
Until the hare came haring along

…and what were you like before…

Today I’m feeling:

Sore. My back and knees are complaining after stressing them yesterday whilst cleaning out the sink drain. 

Today I’m grateful for:

The parking guys with their whistles at Makro.  I don’t know why they are necessary or why they blow their whistles so much as it’s impossible to understand if it means anything.  I almost ran the guy over because I had a clear reverse behind me and he was the only thing in the way!

The best thing about today was:

Spending a few hours in my room, catching up on reading, sorting music, downloading and listening and then practising guitar.  I want to spend more time doing this but I still don’t really enjoy being in that room anymore.

Something I learned today?

The average age of a Ukrainian soldier right now is 43!

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I followed up with Earn, asking her the same question as I did about six weeks ago – Tell me five things you like about yourself.  Her answers are better than last time.  Less focused on looks and more focused on feelings and emotions.

What is a happy memory from my childhood?

I’ve lots of snippets of memories that are not particularly happy or sad, just things that happened. Some may have felt ecstatic at the time such as playing football at school or tragic like the time I cracked my eyebrow open on the edge of a step but at this distance, they are just events. I consider my childhood to be memories until I was about halfway through middle school, pre-pubescent. After that, I consider myself a teenager until I was forty!

25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO –  11. Lead the Way. When you find yourself in a situation where everyone looks at each other, it’s time for you to lead. You’re a leader when you decide to become one. There’s no initiation or a title. Just a decision.

Before going through teenage depression I thought that I could be a leader.  After that though, I mostly wanted to keep my head down though I still had a selfish streak of arrogance which popped up from time to time. 

Whilst doing DIY punk things in Sydney I never felt like a leader but did hope that I was an inspiration for others and I can think of two friends for sure who did take something from what I was doing and ran with it themselves. 

Now, at school, in Thailand, I consider myself the same.  Not as a leader but as an inspiration.  I want to inspire my students to become the best of themselves.  I don’t work for prizes and awards and I don’t want to be managing other adults.  I don’t want to lead people in such a way as to tell them what to do.  Rather than leading I just want to be doing something. Anything.  Just do it.

I took this picture because this was one of the few super cute kittens that were jumping around, playing and sleeping on this spirit house at the Night Bazaar last night.

A Muse – 14th December 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Her words are like kisses
Each sentence inspires
She’s an amusing muse
Setting touch-paper fires
Lighting the way to art
Where the image is created
We set ourselves apart
Related, yet unrelated
Yes, she is an amusing muse
It wasn’t up to me to choose

2nd Dec 2024 – Shared with Word of the Day Challenge – amusing

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good and positive. I got to school early so that I could chat with students a little. That makes me happy. ****** wasn’t there today, Jan said she threw up this morning but I messaged her a bit later and she seemed ok though she still hasn’t even met her mum in their house since things happened a couple of nights ago.

Today I’m grateful for:

The new iOS Journal app looks pretty interesting as it gives prompts based on things you do on your phone. It’s not near a replacement for Day One yet though but it’s possible it could become so in the future.

The best thing about today was:

Watching a Love and Rockets documentary on YouTube and being reminded about what a truly awesome and inspiring comic it is. It reminds me that I would still like to get a Maggie and Hopey tattoo one day.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I started looking into my lessons for the next week or two and realised I needed to make some changes but there was some problem with the files that had me fixing them for the best part of three hours. Not exactly what I had planned for the afternoon (though I hadn’t really planned anything to be honest).

What random memory comes to mind right now?

Trying to force a memory into my head just to answer this question is hardly random!

Hira Hira have popped into my head a few times recently for some reason. Seeing them play at different venues at different stages of their couple of years existence. They are a reminder of fun times of involvement in Sydney’s music scene.

I took this picture because this interesting menagerie of items caught my eye at the hotel we stayed at. The Guy Fawkes mask has become a common emblem though I’m not sure that it’s use here is indication of anything in particular. No new pictures for three days now!

Burn – 12th December 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Forgive the fire the pain
The hand pulls away
You’ve broken down again
Beautiful, in a way

Who you were is worthy
Of the love in your heart
Your mind made up too early
You pulled it all apart

Once the scar has healed
The tears have all dried
The love deserved revealed
Comes from deep inside

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions

Today I’m feeling:

Struggled through exercise this morning as I’m still tired despite a long sleep and my first class was a little difficult to settle down but we all got there in the end.

Today I’m grateful for:

There not being the bad traffic I was expecting when driving home. There are some events going on around the city and surrounds during this month as well as royal visits that close off roads from time to time. But not today! Hooray!

The best thing about today was:

Doing some investigation, planning and discussion with Nampan from SpeechOdd for an upcoming vinyl release. I’m hoping that this will help me get more involved with the scene here in Thailand.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Both my first and last classes were difficult and annoying today but I persevered, having to keep the second class late due to constant interruptions. It doesn’t help that my lessons are designed for two full hours and now we only have 100 minutes.

Something I learned today?

Just as I’m writing here this evening I got a message from Jan wanting me to talk with ****** because tonight she wants to kill herself! Sigh… it’s easy to see how despondent kids can get in the home environments here sometimes.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Talking with Jan and ******, getting information from one and consoling the other.

Offering a helping hand to Freya who is also suffering from depression as well as some physical ailments.

Sharing in the happiness of Mee, who also tried to kill herself last year, but today ran up to me to give me a big hug and smiles, pronouncing that her mum is home from abroad after a long period of absence. Hopefully, this will be enough to turn her life around.

Offering to help out to teach some extra classes since two of our teachers have left recently.

How does my body feel today?

It’s pretty good today actually. I did arm exercises this morning but didn’t feel any after-effects from that during the day, even feeling compelled to do 10 push-ups in the evening. Yes, it’s not much but this weakling old man has to start somewhere and started I have.

After my exercise in the morning, I noticed a sharp pain in my foot like I was standing on a sharp stone. I then just thought that perhaps an ant had bitten me. It wasn’t until I got home after school I found that it was a thin deep cut. I didn’t feel anything whilst wearing shoes at school but in bare feet again it’s painful as hell as every time I put weight on it the cut opens up.

Apart from still aching shoulders after the weekend ride everything else is feeling just about at the normal level of ache for a 56-year-old boy.

I took this panorama picture on Saturday because the whole view was just magnificent. A picture doesn’t do it justice really. No pictures today.

Making Happy – 16th September 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Here lies the glory days
The laughter, love and pains
Stashed ragged in a box
A jumbled collection of remains

Dried disintegrated flowers
Scattered at the grave of who I’ve been
Now forever falling forward
Towards whatever I wish to dream

Once I came back to visit
But couldn’t force myself to stay
The memories are happier now
And I’d like to keep them that way

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions blog

Today I’m feeling:

Tired from a long reasonable sleep. My body is aching from all the exercise this week so I’ll happily give it a little break. No plans in particular for today though I might watch the AFL replays as they should be good games. I’ll get some reading in today as I skipped it a lot this week, running out of time and energy. I need to pick up the guitar too. Suddenly I’m filling a relaxing day but at least there’s no real stress right now.

Today I’m grateful for:

A dreamy afternoon nap, spacing in and out of the jazz core podcast. Is that weird? I remember one time as a teenager Jez came around and he couldn’t believe I was sleeping and listening to Crass’s Yes Sir, I Will album cranked up and to be fair I wasn’t in a deep sleep but spacing in and out. I guess I’m well-practiced.

The best thing about today was:

Drinking late morning coffees and getting a super buzz off them. I contemplated a third but managed to restrain myself. I wish I could drink endless coffees without getting so jacked up on them.

What is it that makes you a weirdo in your space?

To answer this I might have to figure out what ‘my space’ means. In fact, I might be considered a weirdo in any space these days. But I’m projecting that onto other people. I don’t think of myself as weird at all.

My space as a teacher: not just as a teacher but as a teacher in Thailand. By being a foreigner, that immediately makes me an anomaly. We are treated differently by other teachers and students alike.

My style of interaction with the teachers is relatively normal but I am one of only two teachers I ever see engaging with kids outside of class. This could also contribute to how the students treat me differently too. 

They don’t show the same respect but they are more interactive at least. I don’t see myself as being on some kind of untouchable pedestal that this status could afford. I’d rather connect on a more friendly level. That means also having to deal with all their emotional ups and downs and behavioural issues as they are navigating their teenage growth. 

What the Thai teachers think about my style of interaction with the students I have no idea or particular interest. I’m doing the best I can with the little skills I have and if it improves my student’s lives in any way then I consider what I’m doing to be positive.

My space as a music supporter: as demonstrated with tenzenmen I have a broad range of musical interests and whilst this makes for an unsuccessful business model I don’t wish to be defined within a limited genre because that’s just boring to me. Some people get it. 

As a person that was in the middle of a ‘scene’ in Sydney, I was also, somewhat purposefully, separate from the other people involved. In many ways, I just didn’t want to deal with all the personal bullshit going on in their lives or share any of mine. Our interactions were intentionally just involving music and getting that out there. I felt that about 80% of the people were my friends whom I could trust if I ever needed but always managed to keep myself in a situation where that need would never arise. This didn’t make me close friends in their eyes but it did for me.

My space as Amy’s partner: Amy may consider me a weirdo in many ways but she understands my aesthetic and ideals whether she understands my interests or not. 

For other people outside our relationship, I don’t really know what they might think about me as an individual but they are often confused about our relationship. For Amy and I, it is not confusing at all.

Many of her friends do not understand how we can trust each other and maintain our relationship when we are not together but that is hardly a statement on us and says more about them.

My space as a father to Hayden: I guess I’m not particularly weird in this space. I have never been much of a hands-on controlling kind of father and therefore have not been particularly stressed about his growing pains and even when it has been frustrating to watch him make mistakes I have always trusted that he will find his way in the end and slowly he seems to be doing that. I may be wrong but I feel many fathers deal with their sons in the same way.

There are other spaces I fill too but these feel like the main.

What would make today great?

Well, the day is almost done and it was a standard good day without anything particularly great occurring. It was great that the rain that threatened all day managed to hold off until I had brought the washing in. Small wins.

Noey took this picture because I got up late and Utopia were wondering where I was. That’s nice to be appreciated as a customer or even as a friend.
Fatman report

I Know What You’re Thinking – 23rd July 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 23 Comments

Dieter, where did you come from?
And where are you going on that train?
A coat and cigarette keep warm
There’s a look on your face I can’t explain

Your eyes reflect the blur outside
You look lost in what’s gone past
Speeding headlong backwards, onwards
Out into the cold world so vast

Moving at speed whilst quietly sitting still
The dust of the morning on your mind
Stepping onto the platform, time stood still
As you contemplated what you’d find

When you look out, you’re looking for me
I don’t mean for me to be seen
I mean you’re seeing the things I see
Reflected in all the places that I’ve been

I recognise your heart and passion
I see you collecting everyone’s thoughts
The future is heading right toward us
As we must navigate these ports

inspired by the attached photo, written about at Spinning Visions blog
15th Mar 2024 – Submitted to dVerse ONL
19th Jun 2024 – Submitted to dVerse – traveling by train

Today I’m feeling:

Struggled to get up after a difficult sleep. It was still over 30 degrees in my bedroom at midnight so I had to shove the fan next to the open window again and by the time it was getting light, I started to feel cool. Having the weight of the two fish I ate last night sitting in my stomach didn’t help either. Finally, I slowly stretched, cobra, child’s pose, cat and cow and opened my eyes. I felt okay. I talked myself into riding my pushbike to Utopia and eventually (see picture below) am relaxing with caffeine, considering a third cup to cap it all off.

Today I’m grateful for:

Window polish/cleaner. And Amy. Combined they made the kitchen window clean again. Free of lizard shit, cobwebs and other detritus. I can see clearly again as I chug down a glass of water or wash out the cat bowls.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling like things are coming together around our house again as Amy tidies, cleans and rearranges everything to her fancy. When I’m here by myself I’m just living but when Amy is here with me it feels like home again.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I guess the morning start going to Utopia with Tangmo following along was a little test as I had to leave again before I could even have coffee and ride back, taking Tangmo home. But I dealt with it with calm acceptance and just enjoyed the ride and tiring ‘mo out.

Something I learned today?

I must’ve learned something today! Oh! I read a couple of interesting interviews in the Punk Planet book. 

That whole book has me reevaluating certain things about my role within the punk/DIY scene. I think when you are deep in the middle of something like that you take it very seriously. Sitting a little outside of that scene now puts into clearer context how others might have viewed it at the time. 

One of the interviews was about a scene member’s frustrations with the changes he’d seen at the time (mid-90s) and it felt a little trivial in retrospect but I also understand that a lot of time has passed since and more world experience gathered.

Of more interest was the other interview about protests about the gearing up for bombing Iraq in 1998. 

The interviewee was from our scene but had somehow found himself on live TV (CNN) addressing the warmongers in the US government. In the interview, he was hopeful about the movement of protest against this but history ended up differently as political manipulations saw to it that Iraq would be crushed and crippled for a long time. 

Almost every on-the-ground report I have heard was about how welcoming the average Iraqi was to strangers. The same propaganda that is currently loose on Russia and China must not be allowed to lead to military conflict. 

But the warmongers will continue to beat their drums until the tide of opinion is so overwhelming that it cannot be ignored. 

We hoped for that in 1998. Hoped for it in 2003. Hoped again and again. As situations in the most powerful Western countries deteriorate maybe we are edging nearer that change. Perhaps the world is waking up.

What are some things that help me feel calm and relaxed?

Meditation seems to help a little though I’m never quite relaxed when actually doing it. Perhaps the accumulation and habit is part of this process. Exercise helps too. I still don’t use my body enough but I’m slowly getting there.

Medication has ironed out my wavering emotions and I’m comfortable with that. 

I took this picture because crazy Tangmo ran beside me as I rode my push bike all the way to Utopia. Crazy dog. He was scared when I sat down because he wasn’t sure where he was. He couldn’t come in and if I came in he would’ve scratched at the door so there was nothing to do except ride him back home and come back for coffee on the motorbike as it was hot and sunny by then.

We got that attitude! – 9th February 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I am so happy and grateful for our friends taking care of our house and cats.

Ask truly curious questions that don’t have the hidden agenda of fixing, saving, advising, convincing or correcting.

Kate Murphy, NYT

To-do list

  • Talk with John (he will be busy though!) ½
  • Talk with Kyaw Kyaw and Zarni ✅
  • Get Kyaw Kyaw and Zarni to do TCRAH spot
  • Talk to as many people as you can ½

A very lazy day finished off by going to the show at Mohawk Bar. I met Kyaw Kyaw and talked with him a few times through the night which was rewarding and it was good to finally meet.

I probably wouldn’t have stayed around too long if I hadn’t met Christopher Luppi. As the older punk members club we swapped stories and he introduced me to a few others he knew. The evening passes quite quickly in the end. I had lots of opportunities to talk to more people but didn’t make the best of it, still a little shy and reserved.

Struggle Session – Sudamérica Ruido y Amor – 4th July 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Cat #: 198TZM

“33 shows in 37 days, the numbers seemed unreal as we set off screaming through 7 countries, crossing an entire continent. It was a tour we’d dreamed about, some of us for years others for just the past six months, excited about new places to explore and new people to meet, different languages and different cultures. An utterly DIY tour that we’d planned and booked ourselves; we slept on floors, played in houses, in squats, in burnt out buildings, anti-fascist boxing gyms, and on the street. We played with amazing bands in cities we’d never even heard of before. We shared food and philosophies of life. We got free tattoos, free CDs, and free beer. We didn’t sleep for days on end. We ran out of clean underwear. We got tired and worn down, we fought and got sick, yet had no choice except to continue. We met amazing people and fell in love, with new friends, and with life. We may have even learned something about the world, each other, and ourselves. As the days flew by, each felt like a lifetime, each city a whole world onto itself. The tour became too much to take in all at once, its totality became a blur, while each individual memory burnt itself into our minds and our hearts.

Sudámerica Ruido y Amor is about that trip. 33 songs speed by in under 10 minutes, one for every city we played. Each track recounts a unique moment, a shared joke, or a crystallized emotion inspired by the people we met, the bands we played with, and the cities we visited. Styles clash and collide as the days bleed together and cities come and go, yet through the chaos, a common theme appears, one of the kindnesses of strangers and the power of community. We hope that this EP will stand as a document, not only of what we’ve done but also of those who helped us along our way. We also hope that it serves as an inspiration for others to seek out all the vibrant scenes supporting DIY music both on and off the map, in South America or wherever the music takes you. Above all these are love songs to all those we met on our tour. Sudámerica ruido y amor!”