As I stir the soup and listen to old jazz The breeze blows nostalgia through the window Mother looks down at me and with her care Showed me the love that I now wish to share
Holding high the lanterns to light the path Corners follow corners and this is the way One day we’ll stop stirring what’s in the pot And appreciate what it is that we’ve got
inspired by this post at Spinning Visions Soup Plus was the name of a neat jazz club on George Street in Sydney when I arrived there in 1994. ‘This is the way’ is a phrase Amy commonly uses and makes me chuckle for some reason. 29th Oct 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – soup
Today I’m feeling:
Good though a little dodgy in the stomach. I was glad to have slept a little earlier last night and felt okay on waking. I should have nothing much on my plate today so will do lesson planning, first at House, then at Daytripper, with a little shop at Makro on the way.
(Later) Totally forgot about going to Makro as I was driving home and when I was home decided it was too hot to go out to Daytripper. Never mind. I got some good lessons down and formed ideas for three or four more to complete before leaving.
Today I’m grateful for:
Nong Aun for being able to take Leo for his afternoon walks this week so that I don’t have to go back and forth.
She also got offered a job teaching at the Montessori school which I think is a great opportunity for her and I hope she does well.
The best thing about today was:
Finishing vacuuming the house and putting the clean mats down in the kitchen. I know it will only be a day or two until both myself and the cats traipse in all sorts of dirt and dust but for now, I felt a great sense of satisfaction.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I haven’t taken any photos these last two days though when I think back on the day there was certainly opportunity. I’m trying to keep it in the forefront of my mind though I wonder if so much here now has become so normal to me that I don’t notice it so much. And also don’t appreciate it as much, perhaps?
Something I learned today?
The high-speed rail between Jakarta and Bandung in Indonesia went into operation this week.
I took this picture a couple of weeks ago because this is Leo looking somewhat thoughtful as he sniffs around for a place to poop.
Autoscroll with the eyes Swipe right for a surprise Emoji conversations Anti-social innovations Everyone just a click away What was learned today? A new world record recorded One second, triple crown awarded Today’s winner of the internet Is so easy to forget But you either follow or lead The new social etiquette agreed
Today I’m feeling:
As enthusiastic as the weather which is dull and grey. Not unhappy though. As I sit drinking my coffees I contemplate the day, where I may watch yesterday’s AFL grand final, play guitar, read and read and read and possibly vacuum through the house, though that is bottom of the list. I’m contemplating the week ahead and have to go to get medicine tomorrow morning, do some shopping and get some more lesson plans ready before travelling next week. And right now I’m wondering when my washing will ever get a chance to dry.
(Later) Sun did eventually crack open the sky but not quite enough to completely dry my sodden pants and towel.
Today I’m grateful for:
The vacuum cleaner and the excellent work it did following me around sucking up lizard shit and cat hair. I feel like I can pretend a room is clean if it’s been vacuumed. Just don’t look too closely.
The best thing about today was:
An afternoon visit to Utopia for a little extra buzz to push me through the nap stage and spur on my cleaning enthusiasm.
I also bought a 30-baht light switch and replaced the dimmer switch in the living room because the dimmer switch only works with old-style bulbs. The fluctuations of voltage in the house blows the bulbs too often that it’s annoying to keep replacing them especially as they also getting harder to find in stores.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
As I was talking with Amy this evening I realised that this coming week I would need to walk Leo in the mornings and afternoons but had planned to go to work and just hang around a little while and then come home (or for tomorrow go to get new meds at the hospital). This would mean two trips to the city each day which would work out expensive petrol wise. Amy seemed a little annoyed when I mentioned this and she was already tired and ready to sleep and didn’t want to have to think about it further.
In the meantime I think what I will do is do the double trip tomorrow, hang around at House on Tuesday until the afternoon and then on Wednesday I have a plan to meet Bruno and some of our old students for lunch so hanging around isn’t a big deal. Then on Thursday, I can take Leo to Oil’s pet resort as that was the plan when I was away anyway.
Something I learned today?
Collingwood won the AFL grand final yesterday. It was a tight game and Collingwood have probably been the best team this season but still, unless you’re a Collingwood supporter, everyone else supports their opponents.
What do I want to focus on this month?
My focus is on keeping my head on straight, not stressing about the changes ahead and enjoying my holiday.
Outside of that, I’m kind of excited to prepare some new lessons for next semester. I know that sitting down and starting that is the hardest part and once I get into it the ideas start flowing.
I took this picture because Tigger is a photogenic cat.
Sometimes we play like children Before we remember who we are No more skipping along the road Or taking a joke too far Why blush embarrassed at the fun Of pretending to shoot an imaginary gun?
Now the world is our playground We’ve forgotten exactly how to play Life suddenly got so serious And we let it get in our way We removed ourselves from our dreams Made them into our children’s themes
Positive and energetic with any underlying feeling of tiredness just from exercise. Is it ironic that I’m feeling the best I have felt in a long time whilst Amy’s family is all struggling with their health and the stress that goes along with it?
Today I’m grateful for:
Finding a parking space outside the 7/11 next to the hospital as I had to go and wait with Amy’s dad whilst Amy’s mum went to grab some food and move her car. I bought a protein drink there to keep me going as I’m not sure when I’ll get home. I’m hungry after a long day.
The best thing about today was:
For my last class of the day, I gave the students a difficult listening and spelling test. I sat them apart and told them they couldn’t speak to each other. They had forty words to listen to and then spell. What made me happy was that all the students took it seriously and the ones who hadn’t been paying attention were being found out.
This was the real goal of the lesson. I don’t much care about the results of the test.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I knew that I would have to take Leo (Amy’s dad’s dog) for a walk after work and had built that into my thought schedule for the day, knowing that I would be tired as this is my busiest day of the week. During the morning I got a message from Amy that I was also needed after that at the hospital to relieve Amy’s mum for a while. Whilst not that unexpected it meant readjusting my mindset that now I wasn’t even sure when I might get home and to eat. Again, I submitted myself and got my mind straight about it. No point in being upset.
Something I learned today?
I learned the reason why China had to develop its own GPS system. In the mid-90s the USA declared a Chinese ship was delivering chemical agents for weaponisation to Iran, without any evidence at all. The USA forced the ship to stay at sea and demanded other countries refuse to let the ship dock. The Chinese offered for independent assessors to come and check the ship but the USA refused! Then they switched off GPS for the ship to use so the captain didn’t know where they were going. After 20 days the crew ran out of food and water until finally supplies were sent from one of the Gulf countries and it was allowed to dock. When the contents of the ship were checked it was all harmless as the Chinese had said. The issue of the USA’s ability to turn off GPS and later banning China from using the suddenly ill-named International Space Station pushed China to forge its own path ahead.
What are some of my strengths?
Patience, determination (when I care), perseverance, easy-going attitude.
At least that’s how see myself. I wonder what others might think my strengths are?
How do I find peace?
I think I found it by travelling a long way and forfeiting a lot of the things that previously brought me pleasure in a less peaceful world (big city rat race office job).
Making life a little less complex and being in an environment with fewer choices has made me more peaceful. If I had done this 10 or 20 years ago I think I would have felt more restless but right now it’s perfect.
Quote: Happiness is a virtue, not its reward – Baruch Spinoza
I didn’t understand this on first reading so shoved it into ChatGPT asking it to be explained to a twelve-year-old. Then I could make sense of it.
The point of this statement seems to fall into place with time and practice. I can recall times when I knowingly did good things for some vague notion of brownie points. Maybe by repeatedly doing things like that, I learned the habit of doing good things and in time my reasons for doing them became less contrived. I have become happier over time as I’ve matured.
I don’t believe in karma as such, in that I don’t believe that if I do something good then something good will happen to me, but that if I do something good it just makes me feel better. My karma is internalised rather than hoping for some kind of reciprocal external reward.
I took this picture because this was the result of trying to get excitable Leo onto his leash!
When the sweetest words are whispered With sincerity and connection Dreams inspire more dreams To bring light, hope and meaning A little sunshine that beams on the floor Not only warms the feet But comforts the heart with it To counter my own rainy days
Today I’m feeling:
Very positive and happy. By around midday, I was that kind of happy tired, a little delirious, meditative and relaxed. I am starting to feel the wind-down myself now though I still can’t really fathom that in a couple more weeks I’ll be heading to Australia.
Today I’m grateful for:
The guy at the market who sells puff pastries with durian cream. He hadn’t made any when I got there last week and I was hankering for it since then. I also saw the stall selling fish and rice that I wanted to try but had already bought salad for dinner. I have to remember to try it next week.
The best thing about today was:
All the good conversations with students in and out of my classes. One in particular with Jee about how poorly paid Thai government workers are and another with JubJib where she was riffing on this story that she was making up about all her classmates and what their characters would be like in her story. She asked me what her character should be like and I said she should be the opposite of how she is in real life so she should be tough and mean, wear leather jackets and like to fight. I could see her mind whirling with this idea, she seemed to like that.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Amy is getting more concerned about her mum who is shouldering all the responsibilities for all the sick people in the family and has lost five kilos in a week what with running around, stressing and not sleeping and eating properly. Dad goes into hospital for his operation tomorrow and hopefully that all goes smoothly but at the same time Grandmum is not speaking or eating at the moment and may deteriorate quickly. So even if our plans continue with me going to Australia, the feeling may not be of excitement and pleasure.
Something I learned today?
Today is Hayden’s birthday (27? Is that right!? Crazy!) and he went for Korean BBQ with his mum, friend and girlfriend. She sent me a couple of pictures so today I learned what my son’s girlfriend looks like. He hasn’t told me much about her but I hope she is a positive influence for him.
What went well today?
Despite having frustrating issues trying to get a projector working in my first class and all the students wanting free time (which I refused!) we slowly and deliberately did some listening exercises and even though it took them more than an hour to listen and write two minutes of conversation we did it with little stress and in a relaxed way and Jee, in particular, said she found this work difficult but enjoyed it and wanted to do it more because she knew that there are not many opportunities to practice like this.
I took this picture because yesterday there were posts on the university’s Facebook page from students asking about this friendly dog that turned up outside Lotus’s and the market along with pictures that I easily recognised as Tangmo. The posts were around 2 pm yesterday but I remembered that he came to see me when I got home at 4.30 so he had obviously found his way back home in the meantime. The biggest worry about it though is that the highway is usually very busy and Tangmo isn’t the smartest and most aware dog in the world but he had somehow managed to navigate his way to the other side and back. I took this picture to send to Amy to show that he was still ok but typically he can’t walk more than a few metres before stopping to scratch or munch on an itchy back as he’s doing here. I’ve also been teaching him to keep a snack on his nose before he’s allowed to eat it. I think he might be able to do it one day.
Stairs never-ending Treading same old paths Hungrily ascending Reliving time-worn pasts Sun beats relentless As per the decades gone Head spun senseless Sisyphus is never done When was really my time? Did I ever really belong?
22nd Jul 2024 – Submitted to No Theme Thursday and the picture above
Today I’m feeling:
Ok so far, after invigorating exercise and a cold shower. Last night I set the aircon to turn off and despite waking up hot at some point, it wasn’t too uncomfortable. In the end though, I found myself waking up about 20 minutes before my alarm and thinking about Amy’s parents and what happens next and considering even longer term that if they are gone and if something happens to Amy too then who can I turn to for help?
My energy is starting to flag a little by this afternoon though I feel quite contented. I look forward to getting home and hopefully, I sleep well tonight.
Today I’m grateful for:
Getting home after a long-ish day. I’m tired and hungry though not grumpy. Not yet anyway. I picked up salad at the uni market, where I also bumped into Nong Na, and I’m savouring the prospect of eating it after a few minutes in the fridge to cool it down.
The best thing about today was:
Enjoying my grade 10 class as they struggled through taking notes on a phone call. Thankful for technology that allowed us to set up a group call that allowed myself and the best English-speaking student Toon to sit in the teacher’s room carrying out the conversation whilst everyone listened intently, or in bewilderment, on their phones.
Kru Nu came in at one point and sat smiling listening to us have the conversation. I hope the smile meant she was happy with my work and not a ‘what are you doing here’ ironic smile.
Anyway, most of the students struggled so much that in my break between classes I quickly wrote another conversation and found a video that they can also use for listening practice and we will do that tomorrow.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Despite feeling tired already during the morning, Amy had rung to ask me to drop by to see her mum and dad. With a busy day, it meant I would have to go after school finished, where I would have preferred just to get home quickly. I had already expected this call a little and of course, it would be the right thing to do considering the circumstances.
So I dropped by, breathing deeply, meditating my way through my lack of energy. They both appreciated my visit and I asked them about Leo, Dad’s dog, and took him for a walk. At least he was walking when I could shake him off my leg. He has sharp nails that scratched me even through my jeans and leaves a bad doggy smell that Tangmo was very curious about later when I got home.
I offered to come walk Leo anytime they wanted and to call me if they needed me to do anything. They seemed happy despite the situation. I guess we don’t know anything too much yet, just that they have found the cancer. Things may get more serious and sooner rather than later.
After getting home and feeding Tangmo a snack I stripped off my dog-smelly clothes straight into the washing machine and showered off any further lingering dog juices.
Something I learned today?
With talk of operations and chemotherapy Amy told me about how Thai people she knows who have suffered similar medical issues in Australia had to pay very little for treatment there if they were covered by Medicare. One girl even said that she would now be dead if it had happened in Thailand as she wouldn’t have been able to pay for the treatment. Another plus for Australia.
What do I enjoy most about my daily life?
Morning coffee, reading books, reading comics, listening to music, talking to my students, playing guitar, writing here, post-exercise cold showers.
Which do I enjoy the most? Why do I have to choose?
If it is something I most enjoy I would think I should do it more but I do these things just enough. If I did them more they may become less enjoyable.
I took this picture because we were taking Leo out for his walk. I want to say that is an excited look on Leo’s face and it may be, but that is also what he always looks like. Imagine just being constantly excited. It looks stressful!
A red light when there’s no one around What a dilemma for the righteous philosopher! “Go, go, go, go”, the passengers cried Out of nowhere, a truck obliterates them all
Pretty good. A little run down from a weirdly exhausting day and I’m not excited for the rest of the week. All my classes were simple but the last one of the day is always a little frustrsting as these impatient grade 8s want to leave as soon as they can. Me too!
Today I’m grateful for:
The plentiful snacks I have around that have carried me through my busy early evening with taking to the vet again for one more blood test. I’m grateful he’s all back to normal too.
The best thing about today was:
Having to take Tigger to the vet meant more time to listen to podcasts. The day has been good (apart from the news below) but nothing really stood out as being the best. Another day in a string of reasonable, positive happy days.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Talk is that for this coming holiday will only be ten days. I’ve already booked my flights to Australia and will be going anyway. It may mean losing some pay but no matter. David was quite disheartened by the news especially as last year we had four weeks holiday. I laughingly told him to fix his attitude and turn it around to ‘at least we have ten days holiday’ but I can understand his disappointment. It’s been a tough semester and he has the two terrible grade 8 classes that I had last year. It’s tiring for real.
After getting the good news that Tigger’s blood is back to normal I called Amy to give her the good news. In turn, she told me that along with Grandmum not eating, her dad was diagnosed with stage 3 bowel cancer and will need to go for chemo. This will all put a lot of strain on her mum and also puts my travel to Australia in jeopardy. Bad timing but what can we do? I’m not so fussed about having to change plans or losing money on flight tickets but more dejected about the ever-increasing number of upcoming funerals that lay ahead.
What do I complain about the most?
As an English person I have no idea what I complain about because I am not conscious of ever doing it. Even I notice how much other English people complain!
I ‘think’ I don’t complain about much these days but now that I am writing about it I know the sad truth.
The thing I complain about most is my student’s behaviour. This I can accept as they are aged between 12 and 16 and I know what I was like at that age. It’s just behaviour, not the person. What I really would complain about is adults behaving in the same way. I don’t hang about many adults now pretty much for this reason. Other adult’s bullshit is tiring. They don’t have the excuse of being a teenager anymore.
And I know that the same criticism can be levelled at me too. Another reason not to hang around with adults. When I fuck up like that with my kids it’s all forgotten and forgiven in the same way I would do for them.
I’ve been really struggling with pictures recently as my focus has been more internally focused over the past month or so. Things within my vision are not catching my eye throughout these days of repetitive actions. I need to add some variety into my days to change that but I’m mostly happy doing what I’m doing. This has given me an idea though. Anyway, here’s another picture of the pup from a couple of days ago.
The golden age has been and gone We danced those glorious times away Left exhausted after the final song The fat lady now has nothing to say
Revival is just a nostalgic fail That feeling cannot be repeated At least alive to tell the tale Yet feeling sad and defeated
Today I’m feeling:
A little tired and unmotivated for most of the day. A good reading day. I feel like I might be able to force myself to do a little workout after talking with Amy and before eating something.
Today I’m grateful for:
The tool (name unknown to me) that was lying around the garden (used previously to try to break down the termite mound in the front corner of the garden) which I used to dig out the tough grass that the gardeners were too lazy to get out from in between the bricks outside the kitchen. The temperature around 5 p.m. is nice now so I’ll try and do a little in the garden. This ended up replacing my exercise for the day.
The best thing about today was:
Reading Clive James’ biography about his childhood in Sydney. He lived in Kogarah which is just a suburb away from my first Sydney home in Allawah. Although I only recognise a few of the places he talks about I can get a feel from my own memories of the area.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
My motivation was lacking today and whilst I did a few things I hardly feel like I accomplished anything. I suppose I don’t need to feel like I accomplished things but I often feel like there are lots of things I could enjoy doing but can’t push myself to get up and go.
Something I learned today?
The city of Birmingham in the UK has declared bankruptcy. Things don’t seem too great there at the moment.
What are the most important moments in my life?
Boiled down to basics this would be moving countries and meeting the girls that I would spend my life with, for better or worse.
My old friend Fatty would often criticise me for changing my behaviour when I had a partner and from his perspective, I’m sure there’s some truth to that. I guess because of my father dying I felt my life was missing something and subconsciously knowing that one day my mum wouldn’t be there anymore, I held on closely to my girlfriends.
In my mind, I can kind of divide up my life into who I was with at the time. These people are obviously important to me.
I found this picture online because I was chatting with Baipad about pets and she said she liked border collies. Smart dogs. I still pine to have more animals but not knowing what the future holds makes it difficult.
Oil pours from the heart Thick, sad and grey Even the falling tears Cannot wash it away Struggling with movement This unreal ache inside Consumes all thoughts As if one had died
Life continues blurred A no-prescription fix Life left without magic A wall without bricks Cogs no longer turning Rusted brown from salt Stuck in reverse But nobody’s fault
Today I’m feeling:
Still a little run-down. I had some tension in my legs that stopped me from sleeping much beyond my alarm and eventually pulled myself out of bed. The gardeners are coming today and I was expecting them to wake me up but no sign yet. I contemplated some exercise but flaked out. Ugh.
Today I’m grateful for:
Being able to watch the AFL again this season. This elimination final has got me tense and stressed and it’s the end for Sydney and the rest of the day will feel a little flat unless I find something to do to pick myself up. Fark it!
I’m also grateful to the Swans for their determination to make the finals this year against the odds. They are not a premiership-looking team at the moment though to be fair they weren’t in 2012 either when they beat Hawthorn. Let’s wait for next summer.
The best thing about today was:
Receiving a nice message from my student Namkhing (see yesterday) for helping her improve her English. It made me feel appreciated.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
The gardeners still hadn’t come by 1 pm so I went out to grab some lunch and go shopping and when I got back three hours later they were just leaving. As I wasn’t here I couldn’t tell them not to cut Kim’s patch but at least they left the tub that is placed over her plant. The things growing there will recover pretty quickly anyway so not too bad. Elsewhere I can see everything is pretty badly done if you look closely. Really no attention to detail. I was curious if the little papaya would get destroyed and sure enough, it did. I don’t want to tell Amy how unsatisfied I am with their work as it will just make her upset and angry and give her more ammunition to complain about her undeveloped third-world country. I think that will just get me down so I’ll just dwell on the fact that at least the grass looks better.
Something I learned today?
There are an estimated 8.7 million species on earth and more than 80% of them are undiscovered. (factanimal.com)
What am I most excited about for the future?
I should be more excited about going to Australia and I probably will feel it more once I land. The familiarity of Sydney will make for a strange feeling as this will be the first time to take a holiday in this city. Most holidays I had when I was there involved going to someplace else.
As I was writing this Amy video-called and I could see the familiar deep blue sky behind her. I could sense the smells, sounds and feeling of being there. Whilst I miss that now, I know that familiarity breeds contempt or more just complacency and taking things for granted. Maybe I’m even taking things for granted here now too as I’m less awed by the fact that I am here in Thailand.
Beyond that, I’m not particularly excited about anything specifically. I’m either flat or satisfied with where I’m at right now and I prefer to think I’m the latter.
I took this picture because this excited little pup came to greet me at the restaurant next door to Utopia. It’s grown since I last saw it but I could still squash it with my foot!
Security kills me Anxiety keeps me alive The paranoid and prudent Get to survive
I don’t want to be happy I don’t want to want I don’t deserve it There must be more More than survival
A life without pain Would often be short Our wealth is unhealthy But we’re mostly bought
Found in abundance At a temporary table Making me so fat And mentally unstable
I don’t want to feel good I don’t want to want But I want to be good My biology Keeps eating my cake
Denton, Texas befuddlers Flesh Narc pile together the nicest grapes they could find, herein compiled from the first song they wrote in 2013 to the band’s first tour in summer 2017. Witness the genre whiplash that Flesh Narc is capable of from their beginnings as a slacker post-punk power trio to their descent into electronic abstraction and back to a retightened, haywire rock band. A comprehensive review of Flesh Narc’s early years, off-the-wall lyrical content and confused music guaranteed.
tracks 1-4 recorded October-November 2014 by Michael Briggs tracks 5-7 recorded October, December 2015 by Michael Briggs tracks 8-10 recorded June-July 2016 by Michael Briggs tracks 11-13 recorded October, December 2015-February 2016 by Sinevil track 14 recorded live February 10th 2017 at Cleemus & Ploumplesti’s, Denton tracks 15-18 recorded May-June 2017 by Justin Lemons track 19 recorded live August 4th 2017 at Archer Ballroom, Chicago by Steve Gassen
1-4: Optical Intrusion (January 2015) 5,6: Slow Deep and Narc (March 2016) 7: Narc That! (June 2016) 8,9: TS/FN ❤ (split with Thin Skin) (November 2016) 10: Dinner’s Served (Thanksgiving 2016) 11-13: Eyes on the Fabric (Narc Infinitives) (February 2017) 14: Hailey’s Fan Club (July 2017) 15-18: Frisky/Gardens (July 2017) 19: Split with Slackbeat (March 2018)
Flesh Narc is Matt Burgess, Rick Eye and Reece McLean.
In early 2013, Rick joined Reece’s project Bukkake Moms and they formed the freewheeling collective Problem Dogg. In the midst of that chaos, Matt’s long-time band Eat Avery’s Bones began playing shows more regularly, and it wasn’t long before Matt became involved in the Problem Dogg consortium. Matt, Reece and Rick practiced for the first time together in November 2013 and wrote their first song, “Jack Off Cubes”. 8 more songs were written but they got distracted by mineral trading drama and decided to stop practicing for 5 months. Upon remembering they were a band, they quickly recorded their 9 unrehearsed songs and made up about 9 more on the spot, some of which were better. Their first album “Optical Intrusion” and companion EP “Narc It!” were released in early 2015 and the first live shows followed. Human microphone stands were utilized and instrument switches were abundant and time-consuming.
Improvised electronics slowly crept in, eventually usurping the live set for a brief part of 2016. A 2nd album “Slow Deep and Narc” with companion EP “Narc That!” followed and not long after a split cassette with Thin Skin.
The band’s slacker rock sound was running its course, and the radical left-turn electronic album “Eyes on the Fabric (Narc Infinitives)” was still held up in post-production. Thankfully, refreshment was found through the joining of Beth Dodds from Bukkake Moms on drums and occasional guitar/bass/keyboards in January 2017. The band gained a new intensity and confusion factor. “Eyes on the Fabric (Narc Infinitives)” finally released in February 2017, featuring stark electronics and free-associating vocals lost in the dark. The new 4-piece Flesh Narc prepared for a summer tour with Thin Skin and produced “Frisky/Gardens”, originally a demo, but later canonized by default. “Hailey’s Fan Club”, a live album of electronic material that verges on comedy, also made its way to tape in time for the tour.
Flesh Narc’s performance in Chicago at Archer Ballroom (later released as a split with Slackbeat in 2018) showed the band in a demented form on the home stretch of tour. In the Loop Magazine reviewed the show calling Flesh Narc, “noise going nowhere” and urged readers to “leave immediately” upon encountering the band (beintheloopchicago.com?p=20995).
In the immediate wake of the tour, the 4-piece line-up of Flesh Narc dissolved. The band’s next album, intended to be called “Grapes” (consisting of rerecorded “Frisky/Gardens” songs and new material), was scrapped before recording. The band reverted back into a trio again and replaced drums with manually-tapped drum machine and tapes.
And what happens after that is for another compilation another time.
From 2017 to the present day, things in the land of Flesh Narc have grown very complex, with numerous releases of varying styles with new collaborators. As a quick primer, and to fulfil the unrealized dream of the “Grapes” album, this compilation of Flesh Narc’s early years should suffice.
Today I’m feeling:
Slooow to go! I had a weed gummy last night which I thought didn’t really have much effect beyond focusing concentration on playing guitar. And trying to fix the Canna butter bottle that broke, I had a drop or less of that which seemed to get me thinking sideways for the rest of the evening that rapidly disappeared. I had deeply thought-provoking dreams that felt quite negative in that they reminded me of my age and my place in the world. I woke up a little shook. I feel pretty damn relaxed now though. The heat and rain have gone for a while and it’s nice enough to sit outside again with a soft breeze stirring. I’ve been out here for an hour already.
Today I’m grateful for:
Bruno picking me up at the Nissan dealer in the afternoon. We went up to Ahka Cottage for coffee whilst the car was being ‘serviced’. I put that in quotes as it’s sometimes a little difficult to know if they really check over everything or just change the oil and filter and things you ask them. Presumably, they’re doing a good job.
I’m also grateful to Gong at Utopia who called ahead to Daytripper about a pipette for me for my CBD oil.
What was the best thing today?
Seeing Amy happy back in her room in Sydney, already thinking about how to enjoy her last eight weeks there. She was happy to return to more comfortable temperatures although it has been a little cooler here too today.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
It was odd to be in the passenger seat of a car for a change. Weird not to have a car key in my pocket.
Something I learned today?
Watching Brian Dunning’s inFact explained why there are suddenly lots of military UFO sightings in the last six months. It all seemed to be down to a core group of connected people who have pushing their theories for the last 15 years. They’re not presenting anything new but they are all presenting it at the same time, presumably to inspire funding from the government. Which country? You can guess, it’s your friend and mine, the USA! It’s rare to hear about UFO sightings anywhere else.
What is my favourite time of day?
Although I struggle to do it without external motivation I’ve come to enjoy the mornings, especially living here in Chiang Rai. Age and location also have an influence, as well as circumstances of obligations.
I pretty much like any time of day. I’m alive and the passing of time is increasing. It’s not impossible to enjoy every breath but the last one should be spent in contentment.
I took this picture because I sat outside in the cooler air with this smelly boy rolling around at my feet and His Royal Highness Cappuccino in the apparent safety of the dining room behind the screen door.
Princesses, such sweet peas No stresses, eager to please Impresses, hungry honey bees Caresses, eyes of hes and shes
These princesses turned a lot of heads of their fellow students as they dressed up. It’s one of the arguments for having school uniforms instead of letting the kids dress how they would like.
Today I’m feeling:
Good so far, probably because I went through my usual work morning routine. Drove to work, clocked in and came back already as I have no classes today. It’s 8.15 and I’m here sitting in Utopia. Can I keep up this positive feeling? I have a couple of tasks to complete, cleaning and visa application forms, which I put off over the weekend. I know I’m going to have to force myself to do them. Do it you lazy prick!
(Later): I did it.
Today I’m grateful for:
The little pieces of gym equipment I have. I use some stretching bands with handles to do a little leg, neck and shoulder routine some days and I recently bought some rings which I can hang from and which I hope that one day I may even be able to do a pull-up. Just one. That would be enough for me.
The best thing about today was:
Trying to learn to play Bolero on guitar. I can play each part correctly after a few attempts but can’t nail it all the way through yet. I like it to play though – it has a good feel to it. In the app I use it is a level 7 song, a little above where I’m currently at. Yesterday I also managed to scrape through a level 11 rendition of the metal version of Asturias. That’s a fun song to play but level 11 is way out of my league. I can’t hit the strings that fast.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
It is slightly annoying that I still have to go to school and sign in even if I have no class but at the same time, I’m glad I did because going through that morning routine has kept my energy boosted throughout the day. I really should organise myself to have things to do on the weekend otherwise my lethargy takes over. Amy is back on Friday for about three weeks and I’m sure she will keep me busy somehow or other!
Something I learned today?
It’s a new year of freshers at the university and the first day sees clean bright white shirts and pressed skirts. Weirdly I didn’t notice many boys as I was walking around the market. Do they start on different days to the girls?
How does the weather impact my mood and daily activities?
Everything impacts my mood. I noticed today that I felt disappointed that the kids weren’t very chatty and playful. I wonder if I depend on them too much to spur on my own happiness. It was only a brief thought but even those small thoughts impact my mood. As I was driving back I could see the soft wispy clouds on the peaks and in the valleys of the mountains. It was beautiful and inspiring despite the general grey of the skies. It reminded me a little of the Lake District. It’s weird to feel down in Thailand when the skies are grey. I think it’s a trigger to my memories of England. Even when it is grey here the temperature is still high. It’s almost the opposite here in that the heat and humidity are so over the top and oppressive. That becomes annoying when you feel as if there is no escape.
I took this picture because big dumb Tangmo comes for rubs but smells so bad I rub him with my feet.
1994ever 