“Everything that needs to be said has already been said. But, since no one was listening, everything must be said again.” – Andre Gide
Record of the week: Black Flag – Keep It In The Family 12″
12th October 1984
Hinton Martell Youth Club. Murray and Graeme went down as well as B + B.
13th October 1984
Bennett came round. Gave me £10 to get fireworks. But I spent it. Bought Cult Maniax LP, UK Decay 7″, KUKL LP, Black Flag 12″
14th October 1984
Went to Wareham. Got my records back off Paul. He might come round next Saturday.
Record of the week: Conflict (live)
1st October 1984
No word from Jeremy at all. Walked into town and got school bus back. Had a game of Spotlight. Dandy came down. Went home. Got drunk. Gave Vicki some earrings.
2nd October 1984
Finally wrote SHE’S SO BEAUTIFUL… Got in touch with Jez. He reckons there’s another gig on Friday. Rang Simon. Practice should be next Monday. Conflict Sunday. Busy weekend ahead – I hope.
3rd October 1984
Friday’s gig could be in Hamworthy. Rang Paul. Rang Justin. Rang Jez. Broke a string on Jez’s bass. Started drawing on wall again.
4th October 1984
Tomorrow’s gig is in Hamworthy. Justin may go. Can’t get Jez and he’s being very vague – in love with Fog maybe?
5th October 1984
Went to Poole. Gig wasn’t on. Went down youth club.
7th October 1984
Went to see Conflict. Fuckin’ good. Nice blokes to talk to as well.
Record of the week: Confessions of Sin – Confession, Self Abuse – Loose, PCH – (This is not) Call The Cops
Record of the month – Subhumans LP, Confessions of Sin (live)
21st May 1984
Was going to start The Scar last night but started it today instead. Read half of it then watched film – which was ok. Had a bath. Then went to Houldey’s. They were setting up their new suite. Came back. Rang Paul. Talked for a while. Found out Zoe rang, said she’d ring again tomorrow. Watched Hill Street Blues. Read some more then went to sleep.
22nd May 1984
Decided not to go to school. When I woke up I started reading book. Finished it at 4 o’clock. It was a good book. Haven’t been doing anything otherwise. Went to Houldey’s. Found out Kathryn will go out with me when she’s finished with whoever. Zoe rang and apologised for Saturday. Dunno what else I did. Drew In Execlsis on my wall. Went to sleep.
23rd May 1984
Woke up early for some reason. Jez came round at about 10. Jim came at 10.30. Drew things on wall. Decided to do some PCH. Went to Houldey’s. Only Beki was there. I came back and got some sugar. Took our tape back and played it. Came back and did some more PCH. Came in. Jim and Jez went. I went to Houdley’s. Went to get some petrol. Came back. Came back. Went to Jez’s. Had a shit game of snooker. JC was there – cunt. Went to Ben’s. Went to a barn (?) on my bike. Came back. Spurs won UEFA Cup on penalties. Film was shit.
24th May 1984
Woke up about 10.30. Took dog. Went to Wimborne. Saw Liz eh. Got haircut. Bought some paints and gel. Came back. Went to Houldey’s. Had a chat with Beki. Came back. Wrote some of book. Didn’t do fuck all. Went to Jez’s. We went to Ben’s, spent ages trying to find him. He was with Harrison. Recorded tape to tape – stuff for Crass. We left at 10. I got back at 10.30. Dunno what I did but it must’ve been good.
25th May 1984
Woke up. Got letter from Zoe. Photos returned – so I decided to take them back to Bernice. Went to Wimborne – she weren’t home. Went round town. Saw a few old faces but not Bernice. Went to Jim’s. They’d just left to go to Poole. Left photos at Jim’s. Came home. Went to Jez’s to get money he owed me. Went to Houldey’s. Good news. Kathryn will go out with me. I think I was supposed to ring her but I’m not sure. Came home. Rang Paul and Andy. There’s a gig tomorrow at the squat but I can’t go. Went to sleep.
26th May 1984
Woke up. Watched TV. Was going to go to Wimborne but couldn’t be fucked – too wet. Got petrol and paper. Finished another book – Tarotown. Watched England V Scotland (1-1). Started Beast on my wall. Went to Houdley’s, no one there apart from Mr. H. Came back. Started painting the Beast’s head. Finished at about 11.20 – looks fuckin’s superb. Pissed off cos I can’t get Kathryn’s phone number. Watched film – Harry In Your Pocket – good.
27th May 1984
Woke up 12.10. Did fuck all. Had a bath. (?) went to get cat for Lorna. Stewart gave my mum a fiver – I had £2. Ben came over. His mum took us to Jim’s. Jum’s old man took us down to Winton. Pissed around for an hour. Got tickets off Andy. Cinema was a pit. Takano – ok. COF – fuckin’ brilliant. Self Abuse – brilliant. Got chucked out of a pub. Mum collected us. Took Jim back. Ben stayed the night.
Record of the week: Conflict – Cruise
Record of the month: Anti-Sect LP, Sex Gang Children – Children’s Prayer, Mauritia Mayer, Abyss, Confessions of Sin – Loose (Live)
26th March 1984
Woke up at 9 minutes to 8. Physics – had a go at Hayward. Maths – shit. Lunch – didn’t go for a fag. Social – messed around with Mandy and wrote a song. H.E. – had a go at Pritchard. Pissed off really. Watched some telly. Went down club – got some baccy. Bike’s not working properly. Watched Hill Street Blues.
27th March 1984
Got up at right time. Had Physics practical most of the morning. Went for a fag after it. Lunch – pissed around with Burd. Went to typing exam all afternoon. Did ok in that I think. Bus home was quite funny – it was very quiet. Look at bike to see if anything was visibly wrong. Went for a runaround – seems ok. Doing some more art – it’s coming on quite well. Enjoying The Dickies. Just about to watch 5-a-side football. Night, night.
28th March 1984
H.E – (?) with 4 years – had a chat with Sarah. Physics – organising the PCH party. Lunch – me, Jim and Burd went for a fag down in the woods. R.E – ok. English – did this play. Biz – had a chat with Julie. Maths – shit. Waiting to watch Milk Cup replay and soccer six later. Not a lot else really. Can’t wait for PCH. Liverpool 1-0 Everton. Went to sleep.
29th March 1984
Art – burnt a picture and nothing else. P.E. – played football, pissed around. Lunch – nicked some clackers (?). Should be able to get drums from Sponge. Played football. Social – did projects. Biz – did (?). English – read play. Went out to Just’s – gave cassette to his mum – he wasn’t in. Came back to Gaunts. Me, Muz, Burt and Graeme went up to Houldeys. Chased them home. Came back – typed up PCH, organising songs. Went to sleep.
30th March 1984
Assembly – snore. English – did fuck all. H.E. – wrote some songs. Maths – shit. Lunch – played football. Art – ok, new ideas for pictures. Biz – typed up PCH cos Bell wasn’t here again. Physics – pissed around – wrote a song ‘Apeshit Hayward’. Went to see Dandy. Went on over to Burd’s. Went to club with him and Ben. Went over to Roo’s – nicked his bike as he’s gone to Devon. Ben rode it, Burd on the back of me. Met Rich down at Gussage. Played cards in the Drovers. Did a smart wheelie on the way back. Burd came off the back. Came back to the club – me and Ben got chucked out. Came home. Watching horror film Dr Phibes Rises again – looks pretty silly.
31st Match 1984
Football’s not on so went to Poole. Burd and Ben were on bus – wrote song. Found out Mike doesn’t like me. Gilly was fucking following me everywhere. Met Paul and friends, still he followed. Met Simon, still he followed. Met Paul again. Finally Gilly pissed off. Got the bus back. Burd got on at Wimborne. He got off at my place. Ate some frogspawn, wrote some songs. Went to Houldey’s – tried to shit up Jamie. Put road sign in someone’s drive. Came back, recorded some stuff. Took Burd home. Came back, watched Comic Strip and some of the film. Also found out that can get some drums now. Get them on Monday.
1st April 1984
Got up. Did some typing. Chris came round. He went to get me some roly papers – told my mum he was getting some chocolates. Had some jam roly-poly. Pissed around doing fuck all. Watched TV. Went to Simon’s – didn’t stay long. He went and practised with Ian Bryant’s group. Came back, watched Spitting Image, film and Sky At Night.
Record of the week: Confessions of Sin – Loose (live)
5th March 1984
Physics – ok. Maths – shit. Social Studies – ok. Someone put my bag in a bin so I left it there. H.E. – ok. Got letter from Black Flag’s drummer Bill Stevenson. They’ve got a new LP – My War, released March 1st so should be here soon. They’re coming over early June – right when my fucking exams are. Fuckin’ typical. Practised at Simon’s – fuckin’ ace laugh. Especially Balderson’s Boots. Hill Street Blues – fucking funny.
6th March 1984
Found my bag. R.E. – ok. P.S.C.E. – shit. Maths – shit. Wellman wanted to see me – Mrs Bell said ‘well done’ – fuckin’ bitch. English – good. P.E. – had a fuckin’ laugh pissing around in basketball. Getting good friends with Julie again. Maybe taking her to Brownsea on Saturday before gig. (?) not open yet. Went to Muz’s – making fireworks with Jasp. Had a laugh with some on wall (?)
7th March 1984
H.E. – did fuck all. Got hamster cage for Damien – he ate 7 other mice on Monday. Should get him tomorrow. Physics – ok. Didn’t do a lot at lunchtime. R.E. – has film on addiction. English – ok. B.Studies – shit. Maths – fuckin’ shit, got more revision books today. Went to Muz’s, Burt came round. We went up to the common. Blew some aerosols up. Burt shit himself. Went back to Shirl’s who gave us some (?) and a burger. Went to Muz’s, played a bit on his computer. Came back.
8th March 1984
Met Damien. Art – bit of a laugh. P.E. – badminton, fuckin’ knackered. Pissed off for some reason. Talked to Julie. Social Studies – not too bad. Went for a fag with Mandy. Business Studies – won part of a lottery to use an electric typewriter. English – reading. Took Damien home on bus. Chris gave me a lift from bus. Put Damien in cage. He’s not very sociable. When I picked him up he pissed all over me. Not a lot happening tonight. Doing some art and even revision. Rang Paul and Andy who seem to hate each other now.
9th March 1984
Julie isn’t coming tomorrow – but next Saturday. Bit pissed off. English – ok. Got Aischrolateria tape. People liked it. H.E. – boring. Maths – shit. Art – Mini brought in his moped to draw. Business Studies – pissed around on electric typewriter. Physics – ok. Saw some Saw some common (?) punk on the tube. Went to Muz’s. Chris came down. Me, Muz and Burt went up to Houldey’s and had a crack-up. Listening to Aischrolateria now – for a laugh.
10th March 1984
Played football against Bournemouth who were acting like a bunch of pricks – we still lost 5-3. Met Simon in Wimborne. Went to Ratty’s. Went to Poole. Watched Simon have his hair cut. Went to Record Fair. Bought Skids/SGC/Fall singles. Ratty took them back for me. Got bus to Bournemouth. Went up to gig. Had a chat with everyone. COS weren’t playing which pissed me off a bit. Atrox played instead. Then Breakout. Then COS turned up too – we had a fuckin’ great time. Loose for 10 minutes – ace. Idiom Tribe went on – real heroes. Aheads went on to catch everyone. I went back then so missed Self Abuse. I should see them on Monday though.
11th March 1984
Finally stirred at 10.40. Feeling a bit pissed off but looking forward to tomorrow. Went to Muz’s, saw Conway on the way. Muz wasn’t in so went to the BMX track in the woods. Started hailing it so went to Shirl’s – who wasn’t in. Left some tapes for him to tape. Went home. Remembered I had to collect bag from Houldey’s so did so. Saw Dandy – lovely. Came back. Watched It’ll Be Alright On The Night. Had a bath. Had a chat with Mother. The fuckin’ money situation is in a terrible state. Damien bit me today.
Record of the week: Aheads -Minuteman, Self Abuse – Batman (Live)
Song of the month – Confessions Of Sin – Loose (Live)
30th January 1984
Didn’t do much today. Physics was quite good – writing for the Bloodstains. Maths was shit. Social Studies was depressing as usual. H.E. was boring – god what am I gonna do? Rung Justin and Paul – had a chat. Hill Street Blues is on again. Nearly finished my book. Got letter from Zoe.
31st January 1984
Not a lot happened today – boring eh? Patchet had a go at me and Kas (?) in R.E. PSCE was boring. Maths was shit, what’s new? B. Studies – yet (?). English was interesting. Had the Bloodstains book taken by Mr King. P.E. was alright. Doing a tape of the Clash for Liz at the moment. Grange Hill was interesting, Glenroy having a go and sticking up for the poor. Had a bath and here I am. Alas, Smith and Jones is on tonight, it was pretty good. Not a lot else.
1st February 1984
Had a bit of fun today. H.E. made a Lemon Delight which we all scoffed. Physics – I took some incense in and Haywire thought it was dope and nearly took me to the Head of Year. Nearly got caught smoking with Vince by Clarke. R.E. did nothing. English – wrote some more Bloodstains. Business Studies – watched a rainbow. Maths was shit. Hell Comes To Your House Part II has been released. Now I’m here and that’s the end. Finished Time Enough For Love.
2nd February 1984
Didn’t do a lot in Art. Slaughtered Chesh in squash. Got bored in Social Studies. Business Studies was boring. English was alright. Saw Mandy Richardson get stuck in a bin. Nicked Liz’s scarf. Might be buying a moped tonight. See you later. Did buy it – it’s jolly cool. Amanda rang – so I told about the gigs. Managed to scrounge a day off school next Thursday to go and see Conflict and 15 other groups down Bournemouth. Started The Satanist.
3rd February 1984
Did fuck all in English. H.E. was boring. Maths was shit. Art was alright. B. Studies was boring. Physics was ace. Heyward wanted volunteers for detention so me and Rat got it. Mine’s next Thursday when I won’t be there. Chris Frost came round and we went round on it. Went down to the chippie and had an accident with it. Went down Hinton Martell, then the club. Bought some fags, saw Carly then came back. Not a lot else.
4th February 1984
Went into Poole. Was with Lisa – Siomn’s girlfriend, til we met Simon. Saw Snowy – the tramp. Then caught the coach to Ilminster – was a laugh. The pub there wouldn’t let us in but everyone managed to get a drink. The gig was good. Self Abuse were their usual self. Breakout were good. We left at 11.30, got back to Paul’s about 1 and watched some videos. Had some of the most silly conversations ever. Andy was getting on everyone’s nerves and I’m thinking of chucking him out of the group.
5th February 1984
Got up at 11.00. Found out last night that the Conflict gig is off. Came back at 12.30, got to Wimborne about 1.10 then came back. Borrowed a load of fanzines off Paul including Flipside. Had a bath. Had a wank. And now I’m here. Fuckin’ knackered. Cat slept on my bed til 1.45 am then decided he wanted to get out.
1994ever 