Tag: Gui

New Maps – 22nd February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I have the sky, you make the borders
I have a foot on the ground to stand
Watching those with their marching orders

I saw the trains roll by a-rattling
And engineers mapping new land
Over which young men were battling

As history changed it still stayed the same
New lines were drawn as planned
To remind us all of a deeper shame

Where you sit now is where you’re at
It was never special or even grand
But tall tales told will make it that

15th Sep 2024 – Submitted to Ragtag Daily Prompt – map

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and mellow

Today I’m grateful for:

Baking soda which seems to have reduced the smell of cat pee in my mattress considerably. I may need another 10 kilos to completely fix it but hopefully, the mattress will start smelling of me and my sweat again soon.

The best thing about today was:

Was talking with a lady I often see at House who usually says hello in English but we never talked beyond that. I could tell she was quite chatty by the way she talks with Gui and today we started talking as we waited for Gui to get out of the shower (as we were technically there before he was open). Her name is Poy and she has pretty good English skills.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My students blatantly copying work and just laughing when I point it out to them. What can I do? I just laughed with them too.

Something I learned today?

The New York Times ran an anti-China piece about how a top Chinese banker has been detained by police in China, trying to show that bad things happen there.

However, people from all around the world commented that it’s good to see a country not afraid to detain high-level officials especially if they actually have done something wrong because that rarely happens in so-called free societies as are believed to be in ‘the West’.

How have I experienced wonder or awe lately?

My life and feeling these days is quite steady and stable without the highs and lows that come with awe or negative thoughts. I was quite in awe as I did my bike ride last month as I found myself exploring new hills and valleys secreted away aroundabouts. A little bit of that was enhanced by a hit of acid but still, I was feeling awe and wonder.

I took this picture because the colour of the numerous flowers on this tree forced me to pull over as I was driving by. This is an acceptable drive-by shooting.

It’s Not My Business – 11th January 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

A choice is made
And has to be lived with
It’s not my body
It’s not my business
I have an opinion
But it doesn’t count
I don’t need to care
What you’re thinking about
Your choices have no effect
If I’m not involved
No need to push an agenda
That is so simply solved
If I was the father
The body still isn’t mine
Doing the right thing
Will reveal itself in time

My opinion on abortion – I don’t like it (hopefully there is no one that does) and I do (kind of) believe that it is taking a life, no matter how old the fetus. However, as a male, I feel I have no right at all to decide if someone should have an abortion or not, even if I was the father. It’s not my body, it’s not my business. The problem of unwanted pregnancy is far better solved with education and better contraceptive options rather than denial of termination.
22 Sep 2024 – Submitted to What’s Going On – choices

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and a little inspired. Sometimes on long work days, I feel more energetic such as I’m feeling now. But I’m expecting to wind down very quickly once I’m home. I know underneath this bravado is a weary brain and body.

Today I’m grateful for:

The salad greens that Nut and Bruno grew themselves and gave to me. I mixed it with salad from the market and sprinkled on some chilli cheese flavour chips and zinged my taste buds. Awesome.

The best thing about today was:

Watching a Malcolm Gladwell talk. I like his ideas and the way he presents them really connects. I like that he often doesn’t have solutions too but just presents coherent ideas as real possibilities. Watching this also reminded me I have some of his books to read too so as soon as I finished watching I read a nice quick Chekov story. I want to read more. Still.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

From today’s picture and a little below, I didn’t go home after school as I needed to get a letter from a clinic (stating I don’t have syphilis!) and would have to wait til 5 when they opened. When they didn’t open at five I wasn’t that bothered but messaged Nancy who told me they don’t open til 6.30.

I was already hungry and not prepared to hang around for another hour and a bit. Nancy said to send her a picture of my blood test and she will get the letter from the clinic prepared but said for me to pick it up when ready, which would mean hanging around for several hours just waiting to collect it.

I told Nancy that I’m not ever around the city at that time and would it be possible for someone else to collect it for me and she said she could arrange that to which I sent my appreciation.

A couple of years ago this kind of thing would have frustrated me immediately and I probably would have made matters worse with my reaction. Now I’m more attuned to the way things work here.

Something I learned today?

As I had to wait until 5 pm to go to the clinic I thought it would be easy enough to go and wait at House only to learn that they shut at 4 pm now. Luckily they let me stay a while and I chatted with Gui and Nay a little.

What are the most important things in your life?

Amy, music, books, cats. Next!

Amy is important because we share our lives together even if we are apart. She has become my soulmate more than the soulmates I thought I had in the past.

Music has been an important part of my life since my pre-teens and grew in importance until recently. Books are replacing music a little now if only for the fact that I don’t often read whilst listening to music.
Cats have been comforting friends at various stages of my life. I find their attitude compatible with mine.

I took this picture because it was already past five and the clinic was still shut. I messaged Nancy and she said it doesn’t open until 6.30!

Blues Understanding – 7th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Confront suffering
By making peace with the world
Whilst fighting against it
Embrace it wholeheartedly

Structure, inseparable
Death and suffering
Within lies freedom
The contradictory idea

Accept injustice as real
And never stop fighting against it
Every path is correct
With the blues understanding

1st Jun 2024 – Submitted to Weekly Prompts Colour Challenge

Your complicated parts are your best parts. They are what make you interesting and special.

Tarzan Kay

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Google Drive and being able to store my files for lessons there and then to adapt them to suit my schedule and plans. Having this in place has made life more flexible for me and waste less of my precious time.
The best thing about today was:
Being back in the classroom, into the thick of it, enjoying what little control I have over my students. I’m sometimes surprised they ever listen to me at all. A good start to a three-day week for me.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I discovered about ten of my students did nothing for my class yesterday and when I discovered that they had the ability to do it but just that they didn’t even bother I was a little frustrated. In the end, I pushed, prodded and encouraged them and tried to show them that with a little effort, they could achieve more. I didn’t let frustration overwhelm me.
Something I learned today?
I learned that Nay at House is 30 years old though she could still get away for 19. With her poor English and my poor Thai, we used Gui as a translator and expressed our opposing opinions on fair and tan skin and our reasons for them. No deep insights from this exchange or anything standing out especially today though I’m trying to force myself to recall things that I have read in previous 24-hour periods and finding it a struggle. I was desperately trying to remember the Chekhov story I read last night which inspired me at the time and eluded me today. Coincidentally, it loosely ties in with today’s prompt about earliest memories as the story, Grisha, was about seeing the world through the eyes of a toddler.
Write about your earliest memory.
I’m not sure about my age with some of my memories but they revolve around being maybe from 4 to 8 years old in Whitehaven and I have a few different memories from then and can’t pinpoint which would be the earliest. I also know that I lived in a small hamlet called Blencogo before Whitehaven and I have a vague recollection of the house and garden there but can’t be certain I’m getting them mixed up with other memories, including one when visiting around that area in my mid-20s. I will write more about my early memories at some point.

I took this picture because this is student Amy being smart and thinking that no one will be upset by giving the wrong finger. I threatened to show her mum but she said she was not scared of her mum, so I said I’ll show her dad who I have met before and she was a bit more concerned about that! It was all in good fun though and Amy has grown up a little in the last few months and is very capable of doing my work.

Drag – 30th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The dog lashed to the cart
Doesn’t dictate the way
Accepts the choices given
And finds the space to play

We defend with our lives the petty principles which divide us…we fight only for the status quo, our particular status quo.

Henry Miller

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
The animals that were sacrificed to go into the meat jerky that Tokyo and Tangmo love so much. Tokyo loves to see me in the mornings now and today snatched up the empty jerky bag and wouldn’t give it back, growling and snarling if your hand was anywhere close. Me and Gui’s dad couldn’t get it off her though we tried for ten minutes. Tangmo has also been visiting more since receiving these treats. This afternoon he was sleeping in our driveway when I got home at 4.30.
The best thing about today was:
Sending some positive reinforcement messages to three of my students who I can see have been achieving a little more than usual. I hope it encourages them. I need and want to do this with some of the other students too. I need to look a bit closer at some of them, some of the quiet ones that go under the radar, give them some encouragement too. Though I sometimes get frustrated and angry with situations in my job I really love what I do.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Most of the 2/7 kids came to class late and unprepared and I gave them hell for it. But I wasn’t really angry, just loud and serious and though they were a bit shocked they made an effort and I made the class fun for them again.
What will you miss about November?
Erm… November is October is December….can you miss something about a made-up word to define a period of time? Was there supposed to be something special that happened in November that I miss? How can I miss it? I did it already. If it’s something I wish to do again, then I will. Should I apply a more artistic approach to the question? Or do I prefer to be this grumpy old man?

Those dry November days
Blistered by sunshine
Wrapped up at night

Foggy mornings descended
And the roadworks finally ended
Arriving early for coffee
And perhaps a fart to signal the start
Of fresh lambs to slaughter

I took this picture because this is an example of my students ‘in action’ today. This is Earn, a quiet girl with no enthusiasm for anything except her girlfriend. At least she’s not disruptive!

What To Do? – 5th August 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Son, I learned a lot of lessons in life
I should pass them on to you
But you don’t want to listen to me
Too old to know what you go through

*You’re going to learn things the hard way
That’s how I learned them too*
One day, you too will realise this
And then you’ll also wonder what to do

*pinched from Drive Like Jehu’s ‘Caress’

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Gui and Art for allowing me to get coffee on credit for a few days while I wait for payday. It’s not that I don’t have money but that I can’t let the amount in the bank go under 400,000 baht for my visa application.

Well, I thought about telling George as I wrote yesterday but then this morning he saw me down one of the hallways and didn’t wave or say hello at all. I shouted out hello but he’d stepped out of sight. Well!

So, anyway, I went into the teacher’s room where he was sitting and said good morning directly to him to which he replied with a quiet disposition. I got some water and as I was leaving asked him how he was keeping. As has been the case almost every time I try to start a conversation with him I have to repeat the question again as if he wasn’t listening, paying attention or couldn’t hear. I asked him about Bee and said I missed her. It wasn’t going to get much beyond platitudes.

Anyway, I made an effort. I appreciate that for myself.

No Punk Intended – 24th June 2021

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Slamming into each other
Having so much fun
It’s a heaving circle pit
Until each song is done
But someone is down
On the slippery floor they slid
Someone should help them up
But no punk in ten did

The skins have come with bats
Meting out some violence
What to do about them?
Just met with silence
The beatings had started
The punks all run and hid
Stand up all together
But no punk in ten did

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that it is Thursday and I only have two classes today and will finish at 1.30 so will have lots of free time. I plan to draw a picture of Tokyo to give to Gui as a gift.

Drinking – 25th July 2008

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I’m belching Glenlivet.

4th Nov 2023 – Malt Whisky is about the only alcoholic drink I might still enjoy these days. The problem is that it’s just too hot all the time in Thailand. Gui at House was playing an ASMR video of Scotland whilst I was there yesterday and my taste buds were whetted by a drone flyover of the Glenfiddich Distillery, which looked cold, green and wet. The perfect environment for a single malt.