Tabula Rasa – 24th November 2023

Born empty, yet complete
A whole thing of being
A clean slate to begin
Eyes open for the seeing
Entropy now underway
Holes puncture the slate
Until the whole is empty
No longer able to create

5th Jun 2024 – Submitted to FOWC with Fandango


Today I’m feeling:

Pretty reasonable, though exercise was a bit of a struggle this morning. Just a tiny tickly dry cough left and there’s little pain from the tooth extraction but just a little bit of a weird feeling in my mouth.

Today I’m grateful for:

A kind of family dinner at Amy’s folk’s house. I ate as soon as I arrived after school as I had only had a few spoonfuls of yoghurt in the morning. Amy rode out to get me some fish congee which was what the dentist suggested for a couple of days whilst the hole in my gum heals. Everyone else was running around preparing food and then ate outside but I ran inside because of the hundreds of busy mosquitoes.

The best thing about today was:

It seems more common these days to not have anything stand out in particular but just to be generally having a good day all day. This is reflective of a more positive and healthy attitude all round.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In my last class one of my students advised me that everyone had to be out of the building by 4.30 because the pest control people were coming to spray. 

I don’t know why it is that we have to wait for our students to inform us of what is going on in the school but I’ve gotten used to it by now. 

Something I learned today?

Sadly Kru Fang will leave our school on Monday which is such a shame as she has been the most helpful and friendly teacher of all in our building. I like her a lot. Nothing stays the same.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

Despite feeling tired during the day I was still happy to accept Amy’s message that we would eat at her parent’s for dinner.

Arriving after finishing school, Amy directed me to walk Leo and though I was hoping to relax for a minute I got over it quickly and let Leo pull me along as he snuffled in any interesting pile of leaves and dirt that he came across. He gives few clues about what is going on his head.

After finishing dinner I was keen to get home but Amy needed some baking ingredient that we needed to go back into the city for. I took it in my stride, even after the first shop we tried being closed and the second shop not having any stock and rushing to the third shop before it closed where finally she got it. I was satisfied with a nice soft cake that I found at the second stop and I think that kept me going.

I sent congratulations to Funfai for more medal-winning tennis and get-wells to Nut, Lin and Baipad.

I sent supportive messages to Aum and Ice because I saw them both enjoying my class of tongue twisters and helping other students.


I managed to go another day without taking a picture. I guess I had opportunities here and there but I did spend a lot of time either in class or in House and distracted with other things like reading or studying Thai.

I feel a little like I’m accustomed now to my environment here in Thailand. It’s not as novel as it once was though I do still appreciate what is around me. I need to get on my bike again soon and go exploring.

The Illiterati – 23rd September 2023

What did I learn today?
The student reminds themselves
What do I need to unlearn
And take down from the shelves?
What did I forget today
That must be revised and relearned?
To fight against the Illiterati
Some books must be burned

inspired by a quote by Alvin Toffler which I’ve immediately forgotten!


Today I’m feeling:

A little slow to go and tired. I was exhausted last night and fell to sleep quickly but woke again once the aircon switched off and due to aching shoulders from exercising.

Today I’m grateful for:

The polio vaccine that I was given when I was at Bransty First School. I have a slight memory of receiving vaccinations here every year or two and not really understanding what they were for but they were serious business. It may be childish recall but the needles back then seemed to be as thick as a pencil and as expected they sure hurt a six-year-old’s skinny soft flesh. I never knew anyone who had polio but many of the adults around seemed to and told of its blight.

Reading an Ian Dury biography today told of how he contracted polio from a swimming pool in 1949 and all the problems he suffered whilst growing up. It was not until 1954 that a vaccine was finally created and which I would be given about 20 years later.

Whilst there may be some scepticism about a fast-tracked covid vaccine I scoff at people who refuse all vaccines for whatever reason. I understand a friend’s reluctance about vaccines when her brother died after an allergic reaction to one and I’m sympathetic to that tragedy but that cannot counter all the positive effects of vaccines for the 99.9% of people who it has saved from experiencing severe health issues.

The best thing about today was:

Getting a fair bit of reading in. Some more Midnight Library, the first chapters of the Ian Dury bio and finishing the first part of the Clive James bio. I even spent some time in the hammock for the first time maybe for the whole year.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I ran out of energy, as often happens on Saturdays these days. I submitted to an afternoon nap after trying to put it off. I woke again just as it was getting dark and haven’t really woken up properly. I think I’ll be back in bed again soon.

Something I learned today?

Amy got home safely from the gay bar she was in last night. I had fallen asleep so wasn’t able to video-call and accompany her home. She also told me that her dad seemed to be doing ok and they thought there was no cancer spread though that’s not 100% confirmed yet. So long as he recovers and Amy’s grandmum can hang on then our plans she be fine to go ahead.

What situation is asking me to be courageous or brave right now?

Maybe not sure if brave or courageous might be the right words but I have to get my head around the fact that Amy will be back permanently soon. That will be a shift in routines and make me busier than these last couple of years. I’m already struggling to get things done that I enjoy each day. If I think about sacrificing anything it will be watching videos in front of the TV which is what I usually want to do to wind down a little.

I took this picture because I liked the way this ice was sitting in the glass and liked it even better with a black and white filter.