We are the fantastic freaks Gathering at the capital of forever At the dawn of a new age A human be-in together
We’re on a great freak forward No longer just smart monkeys We’ll purify the planet Of the garbage people junkies
Pandora’s box now opened Enlightenment impending Mindful of the messages These altered states are sending
Inspired by the comic story Storming Heaven in 2000AD Prog 2002 – artwork by Frazer Irving.
Today I’m feeling:
Surprisingly awake even getting up before my alarm.
(Later) Today has just disappeared. It’s 6pm and I haven’t really done much. I miss my routine of work days.
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy’s parents wishing us well for the Thai New Year.
The best thing about today was:
Cutting down all that unread email and not feeling stressed about my lesson planning.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
We tried to drive down through SanKong after lunch but the last of the long weekend water revellers jammed up traffic and after being stuck for about 15 minutes I decided to drive back out the way that we came in.
Something I learned today?
A series of studies in cognitive neuroscience found that our brains are ‘programmed’ to learn more from people we like — and less from those we dislike.
This makes sense but we must also be open to the lessons of those that we don’t like – especially if they treat us badly.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I downloaded some CBT for kids books in the hope that I can find some useful strategies, in particular, for Baipad but for any students (and myself). Could maybe even turn them into lessons.
I’ve got some energy today, mainly through having ideas for lessons for next semester, which I need to focus on this week in preparation.
I just hope that what I’m working on is suitable for the students and not above their level.
I sometimes overestimate how skilled the students are and as this is my first time teaching grade 12 I have some reservations.
Today I’m grateful for:
Cap being able to come home from the vet. He hates being there as he is a princess scaredy-cat a lot of the time.
I doubt he slept much for the last three days but the saline has helped stabilise his blood levels and hopefully, he soon gets his appetite back.
The best thing about today was:
Getting on a roll with my lessons. I checked with the grade 12 teacher from last year and they were very supportive of what I was hoping to teach some of these students.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I talked to Kru Mai about changing one of my classes so that they matched the other classes in that grade and he said he will look at it.
But in the process of that conversation, the annual discussion of integrated study came up again and our grade 7 and 10 classes may need to follow that format.
I argued against this unless we are given the lessons to teach (which is not likely). Every year they try to implement this and it’s always been shot down but it looks they are going to try and muscle it in somehow this time.
Also, any rejigging of our classes may also mean I don’t end up teaching the grade 12s that I just spent all day working on lessons for. I asked if that could be left alone because I hope that I can get this opportunity to test out my skills and abilities, as well as the students.
Something I learned today?
USA TikTok users said that they were worried if the company was sold to a US corporation, believing that it would be more censored and restricted than it is currently as a subsidiary of a Chinese company.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Amy asked me to do many little things for her this evening and I’ve done them as required, even though it interrupted things that I was doing.
I took this picture because the full moon was looking rad as I went out to help Amy in the teaching room. She has plans for it but I’m not sure exactly what yet.
When you are walking towards your maker Be prepared with the biggest machine gun Point it right between their eyes And ask them first, ‘What have I done?’
Ask your questions, demanding proof Let there be no pulling of the leg Your maker may only pronounce the truth ‘What came first, the chicken or the egg?’
Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good but a little tired despite sleeping quite well.
I can feel my muscles aching from the exercising that I’ve been doing. Not just aching but feels like them splitting and dividing under my skin. It’s a tolerable pain that indicates growth, at least to my monkey brain. It doesn’t feel like an injury though my right shoulder is still definitely injured. I need to find some exercises where I can still use my arms and chest without injuring the shoulder further. I adapted my normal arms workout this morning to compensate and that went ok.
Today I’m grateful for:
Bronwyn sending me some old photos of me, my mum and my dad. These are pictures that my mum had and I had seen from time to time in my youth.
They were passed onto Bronwyn to leave for Hayden in the future but I’m glad to see them again.
I also found out that there was a book that my mum wrote quotes and poetry in and I’m interested to see that at some point.
The best thing about today was:
Teaching the new grade 10 class and describing what would happen in real life if they failed to do the work that they are employed to do, just as some students did last week for my class work when I wasn’t there and assigned them something to do in my absence.
I described our classroom as the place of employment, myself as the boss and them as the employees. I showed them on the board that I was promoting some of my employees and demoting others and that in our classroom this would be indicated by grades.
Everyone started at grade 2 (in the middle) but the students who did my work are now at grade 3 whilst those that didn’t are now at grade 1. This certainly got everyone’s attention. I told them that in a real-life work situation, they would likely no longer have a job!
I really enjoyed explaining this and I could see the satisfaction on the newly promoted students faces. All they had to do was what was asked and they’ve been rewarded. I feel like there was some real learning happening and it made me happy to see. I kept the mood light throughout all this but they understood the ramifications of their actions.
In the second act of synchronicity for the day, I read this in an online newsletter and messaged the class to discuss its meaning:
“’I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday’”
Even writing this is making me feel somewhat smug! Haha.
Something I learned today?
There’s an ant species that’s unique to New York City, known as the ManhattAnt.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
I’ve been trying to get Baipad to describe her own personality to me because she described her cousin’s personality as similar to her own but she could only answer with ‘you already know.’ I tried to explain that we see ourselves differently from how others see us.
This morning I sat down with her and Jan, with Apple sitting opposite and I said, ‘Come on, let’s play a game. Here’s a list of adjectives, pick ten that describe Apple and we had fun doing that for ten minutes. As I left I told them that tomorrow we will do the same for Jan. And at the weekend I will ask Baipad again to see if she can answer for herself.
I sat with one of my poor grade 7 students (Nut) in class this morning and helped her a lot with trying to understand the text we were reading and how to answer the questions. Some days she is ok to accept my help and today was one of those. When I went to help others she pulled me back to finishing helping her first. I was glad to see this and I think she was glad of my help. She will never be a great English speaker but she is doing all that I ask of her.
I sent a message to JubJib reminding her that perfection is a myth. She happily admits to requiring perfection from herself.
What do I need to embrace about myself?
I’ve become more accepting of my own foibles as I’ve aged. As a sign of maturity, I don’t tend to do things that I wish I hadn’t any more. I’m equating embracing and acceptance here but they feel quite comparable at this age. I am happy with myself and understand myself very well. I know my weaknesses and attempt to improve them slowly without punishing myself.
Where do I hope to be one year from now?
This is an interesting question for me this time as I feel a little in limbo. I am very happy where I am but also considering where do I go from here?
I could quite comfortably maintain my life the way it is. I have no real goals to aim for these days, just continuous improvement. This feels possible due to stability and not having to deal with other stresses that come with the pursuit of new things.
In this way, I’m quite happy to defer to Amy’s ideas about what she wants in the future. That may be a big shock when it comes time for action though, this I know.
Should I have a specific goal for this coming year? I don’t feel particularly ambitious.
25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO – 5. Exercise Daily. I didn’t get this until recently. A healthy body is where you have to start everything in life. If you can’t build a healthy and strong body, what CAN you build in life?
I was quite athletic as a child, particularly loving football but once I discovered booze and cigarettes that all slowly went downhill.
Since finally being mostly free of those vices I have started exercising and by doing it first thing in the morning I’ve been able to slowly introduce and lengthen the time spent doing it as I also slowly started to feel the benefits.
Previously I would consistently make the mistake of overdoing the exercise when I would feel the need to get back into it. It’s a mistake probably 80% of us make.
But as I was reading more about developing habits and starting small and as I’ve been teaching my kids about doing things little by little, that idea has slowly slipped into my own brain to find a better way.
Perhaps when I was younger I didn’t want to admit that I was aging. As it took many years to develop this beer belly I’ve accepted that it will take many years to lose it too.
Again, as synchronicity goes, I also just read this:
“The key to exercising regularly, losing weight, being more productive, and achieving success is understanding how habits work.” – Charles Duhigg
I took this picture last week because I was fascinated by the symmetry of this freshly sprouted pineapple. No new pictures today.
Like I’m heading towards exhaustion. After pushing through exercise this morning I felt a bit better but I can feel that the extra energy I had last week from exercising is not here this week. It could just be that there are no students here to help me maintain a little anxious tension in my thoughts and body but I also need to think beyond that. To feel inspired regardless of what the rest of the day holds ahead.
Today I’m grateful for:
The new Quizizz AI that makes it easy to take a text and generate questions from it. Life is getting easier but does that mean it is getting better?
The best thing about today was:
Feeling inspired. I got lots done writing-wise at House this morning and then figured out some good lessons for my grade 10 kids and as I mentioned above, using the new AI tool has made it easier.
And despite my comment this morning about nearing exhaustion, I was still going, adding work to those lessons at 9 pm after a couple of hours of enjoyable guitaring that I had earlier contemplated skipping.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I had accidentally closed a file on my computer that was a document of quotes that I wanted to write about but can no longer find the document now that it’s been closed! It’s easy to find books of quotes but I obviously had this one open because they meant something to me but I can’t even remember where it had come from. A minor frustration in the scheme of things.
Something I learned today?
I noticed Momo was a little quiet yesterday and messaged her to see how she was doing. Scrolling back at previous messages I saw that she hasn’t been very happy this semester and is struggling to make friends in her new class. She said she missed Porpieng and Baitong since they moved schools and what I hadn’t considered was when she said that they had been in the same class for nine years and that she never practised making new friends in that time so she thought she was lacking some social skills. I always thought of her as a friendly outgoing person and I think this feeling caught her by surprise.
What skill would I like to learn?
I hope I’m not at the point of learning old-man skills yet. I don’t think I want to play chess or bridge. I still feel like I want to learn to surf. I loved bodyboarding back in my 30s and I know the thrill. I never progressed to surfing though. That time may have passed.
I’m still developing skills in guitar, Thai language, and classroom management amongst other things so I have plenty to be getting on with.
Growing magic mushrooms might be a cool skill to learn!
What’s one thing you made this year?
I made a ton of poetry but that is not something new. I made plenty of messes, but again, nothing new. I made some happy students, a lot of lessons and new student friends.
I made mistakes, though hopefully they are reducing each year.
But what did I make that is something new?
I think it was this year that I made a booklet with all the blog entries from 1979 and sent one to Hayden and another to Sharon.
I also made a notebook with a quote for every day of the year in 2022 that I sent to Hayden.
I made a grave for Kim Chi and as I write this it brings tears but at her grave, I feel pleasant as I pick out the grass to allow the other things to grow there.
One thing I didn’t make is any food. Shoving meals into the microwave or shoving potatoes into the oven does not count.
I took this picture because I found these flowers pretty, standing out against the stark green and the deep blue of the sky.
Pretty positive. Woke up with a start when my alarm went off. I was in the middle of a dream where I jumped into some icy water and got sucked into a cave and started drowning. But then I was watching myself counting whilst holding my breath to see if I had enough air to find my way out.
When I arrived at my first class the kids were early and busy doing work so I asked them why and they said they hadn’t done the work in the six-day break and had to finish before their next class. I asked them what it was about and it was something to do with a futuristic world. So I let them carry on and I prepared a related quiz for them for the second half of the class which they are competitively doing now. Easy work for me so far.
Today I’m grateful for:
Hearing that Hayden has landed himself a full-time job in Brisbane. I’m not sure how this will affect being able to see him whilst I’m there but I hope this might be a good starting point for him to find a routine that he can work out to his advantage.
The best thing about today was:
Enjoying being back at school even on my busiest day of classes. I had everything in order and things ran pretty smoothly.
I also advanced myself a little bit with my guitar practising, finally being able to stumble through some difficult tunes well enough to pass that section. I’ve been stuck at the same level for two years or more mainly because there’s a fingerpicking section that I’m not particularly interested in completing but I’ll give it a go again.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Nothing untoward out of my control today. Things that were out of my control were treated as such.
Something I learned today?
I had a little look at my old lessons on Google Slides today and can see that they should be relatively easy to convert to Quizizz for use next semester. Apart from being unable to control the students forgetting logins and passwords, I feel more confident using the system now and finding a good tool for tracking and ensuring work is done and revised again easily.
What do I need to let go of?
There is a certain person that I would like to get out of my thoughts. I need to let go of any resentment and bitterness that has been left. In fact, I don’t have those feelings much but somehow this person’s actions in the past come back to haunt me as validation that my attitude towards them is correct but what I would prefer is to just not care. I don’t have anything to prove so why do I keep comparing?
I took this picture because here is the top princess of the house, keeping a careful watch on his human staff.
A half-finished thought on a scrap Of paper left to wait on the dash Perhaps one day it will be completed On this keyboard that I bash The cosmos forever turning makes For a beautiful hell to weave Wherever these gifts are coming from They’re a pleasure to receive
Pretty good. My classes went well despite some annoyances and stresses. I felt a little bit over it by the end of the day and was glad to get home.
Today I’m grateful for:
Finishing entering my gratitude journal entries online for March 2021-June 2021. Onto the next little journal which continues up to August 2022 and when I started using this app (Day One). It’s kinda ironic that my last entry in that journal I just finished talked about being grateful for the journal itself as I prefer to write with a pen on paper rather than use the phone. I guess I still do prefer that but I’ve gotten used to doing these on the phone now.
The best thing about today was:
Chatting with my student Jet. She asked me what I thought about Kru Ren and I told her I liked him because he was unusual. She agreed and wants to talk with him more because she’s intrigued. She said he is an otaku’s otaku! I don’t know him well enough to comment but I also find him intriguing especially yesterday when he was wearing blue contact lenses.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Well, this is more the opposite. In my class yesterday it was apparent that the students didn’t understand much so I quickly put together some work that would give them more familiarity with the vocab and how to find their meanings in the dictionary along with a translation so that they could make connections. Setting this up kept them quiet and having them write it all down will help reinforce things a little more. By the time I got to the next class to teach them the same thing I had re-jigged the lesson so that it was in a better order. By tomorrow I should know if it has improved from the student’s perspective too.
Something I learned today?
I found some exercises and massage to possibly help my sore toe. I’m not sure if it is a bunion or not but the information should be useful anyway. It seems I would also benefit from buying wide-toed shoes to help too.
What is my favourite way to connect with nature?
See today’s picture. Right now getting on my motorbike and riding around is the best and easiest way for me. I do miss different natural settings these days. I mean the mountains and the jungle are breathtaking at times but it seems impossible to go anywhere here to get away from it.
On Sunday I took this picture because these vivid colours stood out as I was whizzing through this village on my motorbike. I had to stop and go back to get this shot but I’m glad I did.
Two weeks on the suffer bus Do we have to do this dance again? Always waiting for the cat bus Under umbrellas in the rain
First two lines inspired by reading Broken Summers by Henry Rollins, second two lines inspired by Miyazaki’s My Neighbour Totoro and the title inspired by the titular 70s UK sitcom.
Today I’m feeling:
Still a little stiff but better than yesterday. I managed to be conscious of my sleeping position during the night which helped a little. As today is a holiday I’m happy to be around home and do a little more exercise and stretching.
Today I’m grateful for:
The gym rings I bought this week and can now hang from them to stretch out my back. I only have strength enough to hold it for 15 seconds but hopefully, that will improve a little. I’m not so fussed about strength though, more for the stretch.
The best thing about today was:
Getting up early and not having to be anywhere. I know I just had six weeks or more of this but my feeling is different when it’s during the working weeks. The temperature outside is just about perfect at sunrise and sunset too. I should be outside more.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
So it was, after talking with Amy and doing a bit of Thai study with her, I decided to try and fix up one of our trees. It’s the weird one that doesn’t have leaves (so it’s probably not even a tree) and it breaks off easily and exudes a sticky white glue substance that is really hard to get off the skin and as usual, I was only wearing shorts. I climbed up the ladder to try and fix some branches in place and several pieces broke off covering me in the sticky juice on my head and arms. After I finished I jumped in the shower but the juice in my hair and on my head got into my eyes and stung like crazy, reminding me of the time I got conjunctivitis in my early years in Sydney. I ended up crying uncontrollably for about an hour and even now my eyes are still stinging. Damn, that goop is nasty. I hope it doesn’t cause any long-term problems.
Something I learned today?
I learned how to play a simple Iron Maiden riff on guitar today though it took me a long time to get it right.
What do I want to focus on this week?
I suppose I want to focus on getting my body out of this pain and that will help focus my mind. I need to get my stamina back up to speed so that I am not so exhausted by the end of the week. This is a long ongoing process after many years of bodily abuse. I always need to focus on improving my classes and management and I’m still trying to sort out some technical issues with Quizizz. It’s getting there.
I took this picture because this is my bookshelf at Utopia. I’m almost out of music biographies to read and having read all the above need to start bringing new books from home.
I am so happy and grateful for all the things I’ve learned from all the different people I have invited into my life. Sometimes it takes me a while to actually understand the lesson but I get there in the end. Last night I had a moment of clarity in understanding who I am. Of course, I can’t remember it this morning but as it is coming into my consciousness I know I will find it again. I am so happy and grateful for this long journey I have been on.
Oh! I went riding around in the hills and valleys again today and I savoured every minute of it. The cool morning air countered the sun and heat, the sky white with mist and smoke, though thankfully not the thick cancerous smoke that will soon be with us every day until rainy season. Every paradise humans have found required a garbage dump.
I’m surprised I’m energised this morning after a 7 hour drunken sleep, woken somewhere in that time by Indian indigestion. I guess the two coffees kick-started me well enough so as soon as I got back from the cafe I hopped on the bike, no destination in mind.
The locals stare curiously at this white-haired monster screaming through their quiet village daily life but return the big smiles I beam at them. Spread the love. I get stuck behind what may have at one time been a truck but has been mangled into a new form so as to navigate its territory. On the back, two old uncles cling on to the stack of metal merchandise, though one is drunkenly singing and dancing to the traditional Thai folk music blasting from the rigged up PA system. The audio system far more important than the vehicle, which drops bolts and parts to the ground as it bounces around. It’s just turned 10 am.
Finally, I turn off and deeper into the hills through dirt tracks, some familiar, others new to me. Besides the divots and bumps, sleeping dogs must be navigated, their nerve holding much longer than mine.
Eventually, time to turn back, sore butt yet soaring thoughts. For brief moments in time it is wonderful to be alive. Let’s seek them out.
Suitably invigorated I set about the task of finally moving the stack of bricks that has been sitting in the middle of the garden for the past two years. They had become so familiar that they were practically invisible now. Every now and then I would be reminded by the cats sitting atop the stack, surveying the garden, waiting for birds to fly into their mouths.
It’s been a long time since I’ve been in the garden and half the clothing I used to wear has decomposed, my sweat probably had eaten through the fabric. Stacking 12 blocks at a time into the wheelbarrow I soon regretted not having gloves but whatever, time to toughen up these dishwashing hands again.
Nearer the bottom of the stack, I started to notice discarded snakeskins so thought to be a little bit more cautious, particularly as the blocks have 3 deep pockets through them. And finally, in the bottom of the pile, a small shy snake tasting the air with its tongue from within one of the pockets.
I carefully removed all the other blocks, keeping a good eye on the snake in its home. At one point it decided to make a break which gave me chance to capture a photo which I could get an ID for the snake later on Facebook. The snake exchanged one pocket for another as there was nowhere else safe to go, just open spaces around.
I figured I’d give it some time to chuff off on it’s own accord but then realised the nearest place of solitude was in our room where Amy teaches. Not the best option. So it was, pockets facing away I carefully picked up the whole block and chucked it over the fence into the deep scrub and long grass outside. Situation dealt with.
Godspeed….
Through the Facebook group, I discovered the snake was a highly venomous Thai spitting cobra. In our ignorance of its existence until this day our cats and I had been lucky and likewise, today this shy, delicate yet deathly dangerous beast let our relationship end without grief. I just hope our relationship has ended permanently.
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful at my ability to bounce back and be positive again. I remember a time a minor thing would play on my mood for many days.
The best moments in our lives are not the passive, receptive, relaxing times. The best moments usually occur if a person’s body or mind is stretched to its limits in a voluntary effort to accomplish something difficult and worthwhile.
Mihaly Csikszentmihali
To-do list
Hang washing ½
Cut grass at front ✅
Record new TCRAH ✅
Write blog entry as if abducted ½
Finalise more details for WDS
A quieter and much more enjoyable day today. Time goes too quickly though. I wrote a different blog entry today but want to explore that idea about feelings of loss of freedom.
Tonight I will savour more about my trip to Japan.
Tomorrow’s lessons are all planned out though I need to be prepared for the unexpected as always. Our daily schedule will be a little different in that we have to take the car for service and Amy can’t drive. We’ve planned ahead though so it should all work out. If anything does go awry then remain calm.
Things I could have done better today was maybe not going for coffee in the morning. I had told Amy I would hang the washing when I came back but she had already done it despite her busted arm. She wasn’t upset at doing it but I missed an opportunity to be helpful. Tomorrow I will try to consider more opportunities for acts of kindness.
1. Seek someone else’s thoughts and opinions without judging them. Ask questions. Listen. Do not judge. 2. Do not correct someone. Do not one-up with a clever story. 3. Stop thinking about what you’re going to say next and focus on what they’re saying now. Tell yourself ‘I’m not going to say it!’ 4. Ask about what challenges people have. Ask for advice. 5. To make strangers feel at ease tell them you only have a minute. 6. Body language – smile slower. 7. If you feel someone is using you just ask them what it is they want and what they hope to achieve. Are you there for me or there for you?
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful for the beautiful smelling flowers in my garden. When I walk to my car in the morning they smell so delicious. I am grateful to Amy’s mum for planting them for us.
To-do list
Sort lessons for KT for the weekend.
Clear emails.
Compliment another teacher.
Positive feedback for kids always.
Do not complain!
Organise Chiang Mai trip – where is the office?
Add to things to write about list.
Buy new pens.
Did it list
30 squats and weightless shoulder presses.
Found lessons suitable for Khawthang.
Did gate duty and smiled at all the kids.
Had to speak at assembly.
Got given an exam lesson to cover as Kevin was absent. Dealt with calmly and went ok.
Went to city to pick up books and pens.
Printed sheets for Prang/Sea and for Khawthang.
Read about 7 tips for good conversation.
Let people talk, ask questions, do not judge, ‘that’s interesting, tell me more’ etc – sincerely.
I ran out of time quickly today after having to fill in an extra lesson for Kevin’s class. His class had good kids though with good levels of English – so it was quite fun to teach them. I only got told about having to do the class during the assembly. I also had to speak at the assembly as Said wasn’t there either. I’m quite happy with the way I handled my emotions with this. It would have been easy to get upset and complain. I don’t think I complained today – not out loud anyway! I didn’t get as much done (reading articles!) as I would have liked but that’s ok. I need to get some other backup games and lessons up my sleeve in case I’m called on again. I’m not sure about doing an MEP class next semester. I think it could be more fulfilling but also a lot more work.
1994ever 