Tag: movies

Love I Feel – 15th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

This is not love I feel
Salty sweat drips off my cheek
And falls onto your neck

Make a pillow of your shirt
That got this thing started!
Let’s rest here a while
Pretending that this is love I feel

Submitted to Friday Writings #117 – Sensual Clothing

Today I’m feeling:

Not as good as yesterday.  Woke up with a chest full of phlegm that was keen to be expelled.  

A little dizzy and unclear though I’m very happy that my teeth feel more normal again and I’m getting used to being able to eat on both sides of my mouth (for a while at least) and not flinch when drinking cold drinks, though I am still mentally preparing for it.

Today I’m grateful for:

The chocolate almonds that have been sitting in the fridge and that I just opened.  I can’t remember who gave them to us now.  I had to stop myself from scoffing too many.

The best thing about today was:

Talking and playing with the last few students I knew that were hanging around at school this morning.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My body is rebelling against the air pollution and the medicines to soothe my inflamed throat and stop my eyes from itching.  The day is a dark yellow pall, like a 14-hour twilight.  Not much I can do about it except wear a mask. Even that irritates my ears and gives me a headache.  Damn, this weather sucks.

Something I learned today?

Do you know why movies are called movies? It’s because the pictures move. Makes sense, right? And then you remember that movies were originally silent. And what we call movies today were originally called talkies, to distinguish them from silent movies. It’s a fun reminder that we live in a tiny branch of all the possible futures that could have existed.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I helped Amy pack the gift packs for the monks tomorrow.

I helped Auntie cut a couple of banana trees so that she could park her car on the land next door and I parked her hi-tech car for her, having needed to be shown how to lift off the handbrake because there was no handbrake, just a button.

I took this picture because tomorrow is Amy’s brother’s wedding and they’ve prettied up the living room and it looks nice.

Fair-weather Fan – 15th May 2023

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Cheering on the cheerleaders
We’re practising our cheer
It’s our team’s turn to rule
We are the leaders clear

Inspiring on to further heights
We’re living our best days
Until complacency at the top
Sees a change of ways

No longer on your side
You’re slipping down the ladder
Only winners get our support
There’s no time for being sadder

Who was that team we knew?
They’ve disappeared somehow
Forgotten heroes of the past
Are left to linger now

Today I’m feeling:

I’m happy and looking forward to teaching again. Meeting my students was fun and brought me happiness but I still feel I’m missing something deep down.

Today I’m grateful for:

All the class homeroom teachers who will take care of my students. I know all of them so I think we can work well together to mould the students to my wishes in class. It gives me a bit more confidence at least.

The best thing about today was:

Hanging out with my students again. A lot of them are disappointed that I’m not teaching them much or at all this semester. That was nice to hear but I know they will adjust quickly. I enjoyed being around them so much that I stayed until 2 pm even though I could’ve just gone home at 9 am if I’d wanted to. I met some of my new students too. They mostly seem shy so far. I’m sure that won’t take long to change though.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I got my timetable for the semester which threw a few curveballs. Just one one-hour class on Monday which would be great but it starts at 1.30 pm so I have to go to school at 8 am and then hang around for five hours before teaching. I don’t really mind this. It gives me time to read or write or prepare… I can fill the time, no problem.

Something I learned today?

There are rumours that US NGOs paid voters for pro-democracy candidates in this weekend’s election in an effort to influence Thailand away from China and towards the US.  Whilst I think this is probably likely I would still hope that a new, younger government will be able to improve the situation for the majority of people in Thailand. There still seems to be a feeling of hope for the future. No doubt there will still be some form of finagling for the military-backed establishment to make sure they maintain power so it could all go to shit in a second so we’ll just have to wait and see. Thai people in general seem quite positive and accepting of their lot. Of course, they all wish it was better. It would be nice to get a sense of optimism for the future here though.

What is a book, movie, or song that has deeply affected me?

Too many to mention but off the top of my head Dostoevsky’s The Dream of a Ridiculous Man and Notes From Underground, Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina for books. Movies – movies seem to have a less deep impact though I enjoy many. There is one in particular though that I wish I could forget. That is certainly one that affected me and not in a good way. As for music, I think that is all about nostalgia. There are many songs that give me goosebumps.

I took this picture because Tigger was looking cute and relaxed on the chair under the table but he sat up before I could get the picture I wanted. I got this instead. What a life for a fat cat! Cap and Tig have been through so much and seem as happy as they’ve ever been.

Both Worlds Paradox – 15th October 2022

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Beauty fades as knowledge grows
And wisdom comes too late
To understand what the old one knows
As the acceptance of this fate

When a person can’t find a deep sense of meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure.

Viktor Frankl

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and chilled
Today I’m grateful for:
The lady in the print shop helping me to print out a few things I needed. Some for school but also printouts from my blog which I will send to Hayden.
The best thing about today was:
Finishing reading a couple of books. I love the anticipation of starting a new book, a new journey, new knowledge.
What movies do you need to watch?
This is easy. There are NO movies that I NEED to watch. I have a hard-drive full of movies that I’d like to watch along with many DVDs, Netflix and YouTube. And perhaps, hopefully, one day I will. I may even try it tomorrow, now that it is in my head.

I took this picture because as I was enjoying my walk home this morning I recalled when I did my first exploratory motorbike ride around the village and came down here, where the sign seems to indicate no entry. I sat on my bike undecided whether to go forward or turn back and as I looked around a lady outside the adjacent house called out and waved me through. I soon discovered that everyone used this shortcut and they just didn’t want cars coming through. Today though, I noticed that someone has taken the trouble to re-gravel the track so there are no more puddles and potholes. Wish this had been done before the rainy season.

I’m making my case against a stack full of comics – 19th March 2021

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At my school I made friends with four university students doing their internships here. They are young and vibrant people and have a youthful idealism that I still seem possess, so it was easy for me to be drawn to them.

Today is their last day with us (unless they decide to stay here and work on the pitiful wages they would receive) and I made them each a special card. Unfortunately I forget to take a picture of each card but the front features the sketches attached. None of them are perfect but they should be recognisable to themselves I hope!

I really enjoyed the process of putting the cards together and having to come up with ideas for me, somewhat inspired by Austin Kleon’s artistic trials.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for all the movies I downloaded over the years. I can watch almost anything that I ever found of interest whenever I want. I can remember when the only option was to wait for the Friday night special of the Saturday horror double bills. That made movies more special but now I can find movies that I choose from anywhere in the world.

I usually do my drawings at House where the coffee is particularly addictive. I can taste it now – almost 6 hours since my last cup. In the mornings, I can’t wait to get there and take that first sip.

Anyway, Mei, who is a pretty lady who works there has seen me drawing every day and today she sidled up to me and in her best English, her vocabulary quite limited, asked if I could draw a picture of her. At first, I was a little surprised and then a little delighted – my first commission! I told her though, that she mustn’t be upset if she doesn’t like what I produce!

Subsequently, she added me in LINE and sent me a picture for me to use – I’m only at the stage of copying from pictures.

Doing all these face drawings has been an interesting challenge and I’m kinda excited to know that I will move onto other things to draw in the future and try to improve my skills all round.

I had another good online teaching lesson and I’m at home alone as Amy has gone with Takky for the weekend for a housewarming event. With no one else around I feel a lack of tension. I don’t need to think about any verbal communication unless I want to tell the cats something. Either Xbox, YouTube or comics in bed beckon.

Tomorrow I’ll be up at a reasonable time to take Dylan up to a hill tribe village for a morning walk. Good exercise.

*Fat – 20th September 1998

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Email to TLJ:

I’m getting thinner! Either that or my pants are getting bigger! Go to the podiatrist today to get my inserts – yay! Can’t wait – hope they fix up all my problems.

How did you go last night – are you awake? Missing you sweety. We got lots of movies to watch. The Maxx, Roadkill, Ghost in the Shell. Eraserhead is the cult movie on Saturday. It’s pretty weird. What are you doing on Friday night? Is it Saturday night you are going out? Let me know.

Love you

*The Week That Was – 6th February 1984

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Record of the week: DOA – Bloodied But Unbowed

6th February 1984
Knackered. Physics was alright. Maths was totally shit. Lunchtime was boring. I was depressed by now. Social Studies made it worse. As did H.E. Bus home was alright. Hill Street Blues was good – cheer me up. Chucked Andy out of the group.

7th February 1984
R.E. – no teacher. P.S.C.E. – Jim’s shit. Maths – shit. B. Studies – shit. English – good, right piss around. P.E. – basketball – quite a laugh. Told Simon about Andy – no practice Sunday. Grange Hill was good. Went out on bike, down the road and round about. Looks like a good film on later ‘Visions of Death’. Football on instead.

8th February 1984
H.E. – made some bread. Physics – did a mock practical – quite good. Spent 80p on sweets. R.E. was ok. English was ok. B. Studies was boring. Maths was shit. Went out on my ped again. Didn’t do much else really at all at all at all at all at all….

9th February 1984
Art – Ok. P.E. – slaughtered Chesh at badminton. Social Studies – not bad. Business Studies – cut my thumb on a typewriter. English – ok. Fuck all to do at home at the moment. Reading Paul’s fanzine at the mo’. Ped just ran out of petrol or something.

10th February 1984
Did my English exam today – don’t think I did too well. English was a laugh. About 30 of us got caught smoking today. Burdet was lippy to Brooke and has got to see Crud. H.E. – boring. Maths – shit. Played football at lunch – good laugh. Art was ok. Business Studies was ok. Physics was alright. Jim’s decided to go vegetarian. Quite an eventful day so far. Watching telly now – well, there’s not much else to do.

11th February 1984
Got up at 8.15. Went to Poole. Saw Burd. Saw Lisa, Justin etc. Got some vivisection posters. Bought DOA LP. Met Paul around 3.20 and didn’t do much. Went to Arts Centre with Fish, Gilly and Paul. Quite a laugh. Came back home – played records, watched telly. Watched the horror movie – was fuckin’ shit. Talked til about 2.30.

12th February 1984
Woke up 10.30. Played records. Played darts and cards with Paul. Didn’t do a lot. Took dog for a walk. Took Paul back to Wareham. Not a lot on telly tonight. Read book most of the night. Couldn’t stay up for Sgt Bilko.