Tag: now

This Could Be Anywhere – 10th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Child, let me take you by the hand
Angel, let me walk you home*
The future, waiting to be planned
You don’t need to walk alone

The coming is with each step
Sun rising over dusty hills
The past taught not to forget
The truth each lesson instils

Praise each day’s hidden delight
Adhere to the wisdom of the word
Now let the sunset each night
Angel, your prayers have been heard

*paraphrasing Unrest’s ‘Angel, I Will Walk You Home’. It could be argued that the first line paraphrases Ralph McTell’s Streets of London too.
Title is a line from Gallucci’s ‘You-Wrecker’.
Submitted to No Theme Thursday

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and dizzy because of an evening coffee and then many trips to the bathroom during the night along with Cap wanting to be let in and out of the bedroom a couple of times. Hopefully I don’t sleep in the cinema this afternoon!

Today I’m grateful for:

Going out to see a movie for a change.  I’m grateful that even here in North Thailand I’m not far away from a movie theatre that shows movies in English.

The best thing about today was:

Nothing stands out today in particular.  Everything has been pretty good.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I was expecting to leave at around 2pm today but Amy was hungry and said we will leave at 12.  Well, ok then.

My yearly subscription renewal for Quizizz was automatically deducted today which took out a much-needed 800 baht from my account.  

Not much I can do about that as I need the subscription so that I can continue teaching with this tool next semester.  

I am grateful that they didn’t put the price up which is what normally happens.

Something I learned today?

Okinawa used to be called Ryukyu up until the 1870s and was a tributary state to China before Japan invaded on a murderous conquest.

What made me laugh out loud today?

I don’t tend to laugh out loud much these days unless I’m playing with my students at school – they certainly make me laugh a lot.  In day-to-day life though I am…subdued…. Is that the correct word?

I like to think that I am more emotionally stable these days, as I’ve mentioned before, and not so affected by the ups and downs of my mood.

In today’s thoughts about the best thing about today, the whole day has been pleasant and relaxing without any real highlights and definitely no lows.  This is preferable for me these days.

Perhaps I do need to laugh more (outside of school) and be a bit more playful, maybe.

Sarah took this picture on Thursday because I wanted a photo with Apple, Baipad and Jan to remember them and Iphone snuck in on the right too.

The Great Music Stealer – 26th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Been through all my mp3s
Got them into folders
Making them easier to find
Tagged with genre holders
Downloaded semi-legally
Some, decades ago
Now they are all mine
Apparently so

Now I have cloud storage
Folders I can share
7 million songs
Are waiting for you there
Music, the great healer
In any shape or form
From drum to vinyl to CD
And now digital the norm!

Humorously written in reply to Music the great healer here at Poet’s Corner

Been through all my vinyl
got them into plastic sleeves
protection from the dust and grime
that passing time it leaves
Cathartic, it was wholesome
remembering the time
when I purchased each and brought them
home when they were all then mine

And now I have a flight case
with a selection waiting there
to play on my turntable
and with some others share
Music, the great healer
it is a remedy to cure
or at very least bring respite
as its purpose is so pure

©Jemverse

Today I’m feeling:

A little better this morning. I started feeling a little better last night but crashed out early deliriously in and out of consciousness hearing the duff duff of the DJ and Amy’s screams. Amy was the last one standing, as usual, dancing on her own as everyone else retired and left.

Today I’m grateful for:

Aing and Now, who have been borrowing our bike and car but put petrol in them and got the front tyre of the bike replaced when it went flat last night.

The best thing about today was:

Reading more of this book about the Rise and Fall of the British Empire, this time about the way the British dealt with China from 1800 onwards.  

I’ve read about this history before and it still makes me upset.  I kind of felt smug whilst reading it this time though, knowing how the UK is fairing in the world these days compared to China.

Something I learned today?

In Vietnam, for many drunk drivers, it’s cheaper to abandon the bike than to pay the fine. Now the police are wondering what to do with them all…

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I helped Baipad with work and motivation for about an hour and a half this morning and I think she carried on working after I left and hopefully finished them all.

25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO –  21. Don’t Take Yourself So Seriously. Yeah, yeah, you’re an individual, and people have to take you seriously, I get it. But at the end of the day, we’re all a bunch of ants trying to chase the same things. Lighten up.

I don’t take myself too seriously though I do take what I do seriously.  

People say I am serious but I think that it is just that I am not easily amused by many people, not adults.

It’s hard to be serious surrounded by naughty 13-year-olds much of the day and whilst it’s still easy to fall down to their level I hope I at least pull them up a little bit to mine.  

I don’t mind being a clown or a fool for the sake of the kids.  It makes me laugh to think of adults looking down on me for clowning around.

The Haunting – 25th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 13 Comments

I see you
I see you on the wall
How can I like you
Curled lip and all?

Your posture
Seems to be exclaiming
Your ugliness
Accusatory and blaming

Your yellowed arms
Wild and free
A broken halo
You haunt me

Shared to Crimson’s Creative Challenge #276 (picture prompt below)
3rd Oct 2024 – Shared with dVerse – haunting

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and sleepy and little prepared for Amy’s planned day ahead, a trip to the waterfall and to the place where she left her charger and then an evening out at Casa Mio with Aing and Now. Ugh. I just want to rest.

Today I’m grateful for:

That we didn’t have to go out tonight in the end.  I was phasing in and out of lucidity as I was eating at the river restaurant and everyone decided it would be best to stay and eat at home together instead.  

I resisted sleeping and felt a little better after medicine but also felt as if I could slip into a long deep sleep easily.

The best thing about today was:

Difficult to pinpoint.  I haven’t particularly enjoyed the day due to my feeling but then nothing bad happened either.  

Oh, maybe the best thing was that Amy got her charger back from the hotel where she stayed and it was close to where we were going too, so all that worked out ok.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

My feeling, unfortunately.  I either felt sick and dizzy from my runny nose and headache or sick and dizzy from the medicine that countered my runny nose and headache.

Something I learned today?

Out at lunch, Aing asked if we knew the DJ at Rad Bar and showed a picture.  I said he looked familiar but couldn’t place him.  

Later, Aing said that he would come and join us for dinner and DJ.  OK.  

When he turned up it was Leo, the Ukrainian teacher in primary.  

And the girl he came with said that she would finally meet the person who made the delicious cinnamon rolls.  

Somehow or other everyone knows everyone and everything that goes on around this little city.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I complied with Amy’s wishes when she needed and in return, she didn’t push too much knowing how I was feeling.

I took this picture from our restaurant table in the river. My body still isn’t flexible enough to sit cross-legged for long periods of time and my ass and back were aching.

Touch, Don’t Touch – 24th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Don’t touch me there
Not today anyway
Show me that you care
And you will stay

Don’t touch that part
I’m not ready yet
Break my heart
And see what you get

Touch me and surprise
Yes means go!
But otherwise
No means no!

Submitted to dVerse Quadrille #195

Searching my tiny little brain for inspiration for the prompt word ‘touch’, I suddenly remembered the lesson I taught my grade 10 students yesterday about sexual abuse.

On one of the slides I showed a cartoon boy and girl in underwear with the title ‘Don’t touch me there’ and we discussed where it was ok to touch another person without permission.

The final slide contains the text ‘Whatever we wear, wherever we go, yes means yes, no means no.’ I love hearing the kids say ‘no means no’, not just because of the meaning in this context but because NOMEANSNO is one of my favourite lyrical bands that has stayed with me throughout my life.

So this all came together quite quickly in the end and it was just a matter of squeezing everything down to 44 words for the challenge.

Today I’m feeling:

Not so great this morning. I didn’t sleep well as snot dripped out of my nose when I slept on my left and my shoulder ached on my right. Will have to get some medicine to fix me up as we have a housewarming to go to tonight.

Today I’m grateful for:

Being free to take a long sleep of recovery from about 11 am until 4pm. After taking some medicine and reading for a little bit I fell into wild and crazy dreams, stirring in and out of delirium each toss and turn.

The best thing about today was:

I haven’t felt like there was anything today that was best. I enjoyed reading some more of Thurston Moore’s Sonic Life. That’s about it for today.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Being at this housewarming is out of my control. I feel sleepy and medicine dizzy. Not unhappy but not particularly sociable.

Something I learned today?

Aing and Now, who arrived here last night for Now’s friend’s graduation had to travel by bus from Bangkok this time, with a day in Chiang Mai on the way. Money is tight for them these days and I know they appreciate our free accommodation.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

After my long sleep, I thought that I would be ok for the housewarming and drove us there through, familiar to me, beautiful green rice paddies which Amy enjoyed, especially as the sun was moving into the golden hour.

At the party though, I wasn’t feeling good and the thumping over-extended PA was giving me a headache as all-comers were slowly slipping into a typical village drunken mania.

I anticipate a couple of cars ending up stuck in the paddies later. I made my retreat telling Amy to call and I would come and pick her up later.


I took this picture because this is the view from the open kitchen at the housewarming we are at. The other three sides are rice fields too. Nice. Perhaps the wooden shack in view is the original house. There seem to be about ten or more people sitting in there, cooking, eating and drinking.

Dying Dynasties – 9th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

Incapable of relinquishing self-image
Narcissus drowned in his own pool
Flailing wildly at the reality around
The king becomes the fool

Trying to satisfy their own myth
Yet satisfying neither foe nor friend
History shows that for every rise
Every dynasty will surely end

Soon the fall accelerates
Mistakes compound exponential
Rulers rue their overreach
Whilst the ruled realise their potential

A letter from future me (sent 9th February 2023)

Dear FutureMe,

I recently received a letter from PastMe which I had written one year previously. In that letter, it was scout week and Aing and Now were here for Aing’s graduation. And so it is this time, scout week and Aing and Now are visiting again for their friend’s graduation.

Yesterday we went on a walk up to Khun Korn waterfall where I couldn’t help myself and stripped down and jumped into the freezing waters and felt the breath pushed out of my body by the water dropping the ten metres or so onto my head. It felt amazing. I feel revitalised but also tired today.

It was a funny coincidence that for scout week the M3 students were also at Khun Korn so I dropped by and saw them all getting cold, wet and dirty. They looked like they were having begrudging fun.

The future is not clear so I’ll just keep going until I receive this letter and can reflect back on what happened. Amy and I have discussed possibilities such as my going to Australia for a little break and then coming back together. This would be around the end of the year. She is also considering going to work with Mai for a while if she gets pregnant again. She is definitely going to Athens and Santorini in July before coming back to help me with my visa again. We also discussed her return here to maybe teach a little again and think about opening a small cafe/restaurant here. I still hope she decides to do that because that was one of our original plans when moving here. I wonder what the situation will be by the time of reading this!?

The world is open to many possibilities for us, which is a good place to be.

Will I remember the struggle this year of dealing with my troublesome classes? Will it have been any better with my new classes? I hope I have found some strategies for better dealing with it.

I’m also busy being lazy. Reading, watching TV, listening to music. But also spending a lot of time updating 1994ever.com. Not that it will ever be finished but I hope I’m closer to having all the pre-2000s information completed by now. There’s still a lot of stuff to go through.

I’m enjoying life though not quite as much as last year. Right now, I feel a little stuck in an anticipatory wait. Maybe I need to make something happen next. Or maybe it’s just a feeling and not my reality. How am I feeling now?

These letters to myself are not as easy to write as they are to other people!
So with that I’ll be off for now!

Today I’m feeling:

Sick with a cold.  My sore throat was hurting through the night and I woke up with a head full of snot.  I think I’ll not hang out for too long this morning before heading home and finding some medicine, rest and sleep.

Today I’m grateful for:

The pharmacy that was open in the village where I bought medicine for fever, sore throat and itchy nose.  KhaoTang’s mum’s shop was closed today as were a few other places, possibly due to the Chinese New Year.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling very relaxed despite my sickness.  I had nowhere to be and nothing to do beyond whatever I wanted.  I wrote to Rob and caught him up on some of my news.  I’ll try to keep that communication going again.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Despite being hungry, eating was a bit of a struggle.  I didn’t really have an appetite and even though I knew the food was tasty my receptors weren’t getting the message.  I forced myself to eat it all though.

Something I learned today?

China made a microchip that uses light rather than electrons. It is said to be three thousand times faster than its electron equivalent and uses so little energy in comparison that it could last for 500 years before needing a recharge.

25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO –  15. Rest Before You Are Tired. Even if you love your job, and every day seems like a holiday, you need to take time to rest. You’re a human and not an android, never forget that.

I love rest but I also hate it.  I lay down too much and spend many hours reading in that position.  I love reading.  It feels like resting.  I like to get things done.  I always like to be lazy.  I push myself too much and my body forces me to stop.  I’m still working on getting the balance right.  Another decade or two and I should be good to go!

I took this picture because I thought these tiny little flowers were cute when I walked around Mum’s garden last week. My mind has been focused on words rather than pictures this week.

Wonderland – 25th October 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Pinned to the floor, mouth full of dirt
Listening carefully for the next scream or roar
Unable to feel hurt, waiting for a hand
To pull back up to the new wonderland

No feeling in the toes, eyes red and wet
Blood pulses slowly down the nose
It’s not over yet, a forever-shifting sand
Every day a vision of this wonderland

Darkness surrounds, night is as day
Sharing space in these sacred grounds
Desperate again to play, desperate again to stand
Amongst the ruins of this wonderland

In and out of sleep, time for final dreams
All the promises no one was able to keep
Who knows what it means when it was all planned
And the devils came to play in this wonderland

24th Jun 2024 – Submitted to FOWC with Fandango

Today I’m feeling:

Sleepy but alive. As my body slowly revives from another rude awakening I’m sitting outside watching birds searching through the long grass for snacks or useful detritus for nest building, which I’m grateful to see they are taking full advantage of all our trees and safe nooks.

Today I’m grateful for:

Aing, Now and their two friends who helped look after our house and cats and best of all were very quiet and gentle so that us and our cats weren’t disturbed.

The best thing about today was:

Sushi buffet for dinner that I had saved up my hunger for, only eating a couple of pieces of bread around lunch time.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Having our house back to ourselves has set Amy off on a cleaning frenzy despite being tired and full after dinner and this leads to lots of ‘do this, get that, get this, do that’ to which I oblige and after a little while say ‘anything else?’ hoping that there isn’t!

Something I learned today?

Talking with my student Baipad I found out that she is part Lahu and of Chinese descent. I only discovered this when she told me she was staying in a village somewhere and when I looked it up it was the Lahu village that Bruno and I stopped at the time we rode out to Tha Ton.

What’s an opinion I held for a long time but changed?

When I was younger I ignorantly believed in freedom and anarchy. I say ignorantly in that I just didn’t know enough about it but I believed in the good of people in general, to help each other and make it work.

Age brings cynicism! I understand the appeal of less governance but ultimately I feel as if it is from the perspective of Western self-centredness and that leaves a lot of places for some to be left behind. Over time I’ve come to appreciate the ‘benevolent dictatorship’ of China, if I can call it that.

A well-governed country may not satisfy everyone when it comes to freedom but it seemed ironic to me when visiting that there was a feeling of more freedom in China than there wass in Australia (though I appreciate this was speaking as a guest).

Thailand is also way more relaxed in its rule of law, which has its upsides and downsides, of course. The government here is also not quite so benevolent to its people, or as well organised.

Governments that are corrupted are the scourge of the planet. It doesn’t matter what form the take. Corruption is the key.

Who Wears The Crown? – 23rd October 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Where the waters glisten night and day
With all the pearls of wisdom on display
There’s a bridge over untroubled waves
That draws the diamonds a gambler craves

Awash with stories, a rain with dice
There are twenty floors of a winner’s advice
A promise of the life richly deserved
Park your dreams in the spot reserved

Pearly smiles are this devil’s greeting
The chase of the highs is forever fleeting
One more roll, one more spin or turn
The future is no longer of concern
From the shore or dreams, ships depart
Into the mists of the broken heart

Today I’m feeling:

A little anxious about all the things that need to be done when we get back home but also thankful that home is there waiting for me.

(Later) Amy was straight into cleaning mode so I dashed out for coffee revival at Utopia. Once back home though I got sucked into the whirlwind.

Today I’m grateful for:

The hotel staff who helped us in the morning, the taxi driver who told us about his BYD electric car, the Thai Smile check-in staff who was very helpful with our bags, the airport staff we interacted with, the pilots for flying us home, the cabin crew who gave us a snack and water, Aing for picking us up at the airport on time, Now for washing the car (badly but I appreciate the effort), Art for a great first coffee home, the seller for his fish for our dinner. All the people in and out of my space that didn’t kill me today.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling positive and content despite all our running around. Getting back to our home was a little strange for a moment but when I jumped on the bike to go to Utopia I suddenly felt free again. 

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Aing and Now had two friends staying over and asked if they could stay for a couple more days. For me, it doesn’t really matter as we are still busy running around and Amy didn’t have any problem either except when we met them they didn’t say anything except hello. Amy was upset about that and I tried to rationalise it away. It’s pretty Thai style but still…

Also, despite us just getting back we had to drive into the city for dinner at Amy’s parents as her brother was here for the weekend and flies back early in the morning. It was literally, drive there, eat and drive back!

Something I learned today?

I caught up with all my Substack reading over the last couple of days so lots of stuff went into my eyes and possibly made it to my brain. I think I read one article twice without even realising it. Anyway, one thing that I do recall is a breakthrough in quantum computing. I don’t understand exactly what the machine was doing but the computation took one-millionth of a second whereas it was estimated it would take our current fastest supercomputer ten billion years to complete! That’s outrageous! But will it be useful? Time will tell.

What’s my earliest childhood memory?

I’ve answered this before and I’m a little curious if I would say the same thing now. It must be something from living in Bransty, Whitehaven. I have quite a few memories from there but can’t quite put them in order. The most important memory is from when I was 4 years old (and I even wonder now if that’s right but I’ve made it that age over the times I’ve recalled it) and crying because I didn’t want to die. I assume this may have been triggered by talking to my mum about why I didn’t have a father like other kids. Learning about death is pretty traumatic for a four-year-old.

I took this picture because I’m back home and our giant asparagus plant thing is about to do something. I don’t recall there being amazing flowers but it’s obviously part of its reproduction cycle. The other one that grew before hasn’t flowered again since it did back three or four years ago.

Left To Stay – 16th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Time doesn’t have to make sense
In fact, it never will
Every now becomes a then
Forever standing still
A life amounts to nothing much
Just another day today
Gone are the years to come
There’s nothing left to stay

Today I’m feeling:

Aircon worked all night again though I changed the setting so it wasn’t freezing but I still woke up a few times and on top of being worn out, I woke up groggy, already thinking about tomorrow’s sleep-in. However, I got going with some exercise and my body feels good. Hopefully, this first coffee I’m waiting for helps keep my eyes open through my four hours between classes.

Today I’m grateful for:

My poorer students. Sometimes it is more enjoyable to watch them discover something than to watch the ones already up to speed rush to finish first. In my morning class, I was worried about how to fill the time but thankfully many students struggled with the task and we ended up finishing just five minutes early.

The best thing about today was:

I just finished playing guitar for about an hour and enjoyed making a bad racket for no one to hear. My whole day was enjoyable with tiring but fun classes filled with laughter.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I couldn’t stop myself from getting a late afternoon coffee as I was running around after school. I think it kept me going but may also keep me up tonight. I will handle it by sleeping in tomorrow if I wish.

Something I learned today?

I found out that at the end of the month is scout week again plus two days holiday too! What a life.

What is a recent accomplishment I am proud of?

That’s an interesting question. I think my accomplishments may be diminishing in grandeur these days but that is fine. I’ll bite off whatever I can gum. I’m quite proud of myself for my improving Thai skills though I’m still way off from being able to carry out a decent conversation but I was happy for my students to tell me that they appreciated that I spoke a little Thai with them and one student told me my pronunciation was the best of the foreign teachers in the school. It’s a bit of a delicate balance as the schools generally don’t want the foreign teachers speaking Thai but I’ll do whatever I can to help my students understand.

I took this picture because Tokyo is not an excitable puppy anymore but now has a chunky body with a skinny neck and a thin face. She spends her day mostly lazing around like this.

Almost – 7th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

You became the master of money
And accumulated great wealth
Became a master of muscles
And maintaining physical health
But that final puzzle piece
Is still hidden as if by stealth
Couldn’t master your mind
Couldn’t master yourself

18th Apr 2024 – Submitted to Word of the Day Challenge

Today I’m feeling:

Happy and relaxed, waiting for the sun to drop so I can do some watering again. I’m hoping for an early rainy season again but I think this year may be long and dry, unfortunately.

Today I’m grateful for:

Manus at the post office for always being helpful and friendly and trying to help me remember the Thai word for ‘registered’.

The best thing about today was:

A long chat with Amy about different ideas and plans for the future.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I had just gotten on a roll with updating more blog entries when Fui came to House and we started talking. I’m never sure how long he will stay but I decided I had no hurry today and we ended up chatting for about 90 minutes. We often go over the same things but we learn a little more about each other each time. At points, I was keen to get back to what I was doing but I told myself to relax and enjoy this time.

Something I learned today?

You can buy a cock ring called the Tally Wacker that counts your thrusts when fucking. I’m not sure if it syncs with your health devices but maybe 100 thrusts equals a calorie?

What is one lesson I am learning right now?

We’ll have to generalise ‘right now’ a little because if taken literally all I’m learning is what I can remember from ‘around’ ‘right now’!

I’m learning a little how to relax and even be bored again. This week involves a lot of TV and reading, playing guitar and listening to music. Much like many other weeks but interspersed with even less teaching than usual.

It’s taken me a long time to learn to relax and in the back of my mind, I’m confident that when the time comes necessary I will be able to get right back on my game again.

I took this picture because I wanted a different angle to look at the garden. I like this mini bamboo plant that apparently cats like to eat. Not sure ours ever do though. The leafless frangipani has more focus than the other trees near it which are also now losing their leaves. The frangipanis are just starting to show leaves sprouting through now. You can also spy the tops of some of our cacti too.

Letter to future me (sent 7th Feb 2022)

Dear FutureMe,

It’s the 7th of February 2022 and I’m sitting in the cafe, Le Paradis, next door to CRPAO, where I am currently an English teacher. It’s scout week and us farang teachers have nothing to do for this whole week. I’ve decided to clock in, show my face and go home again unless anyone wants me to do anything.

I’m feeling pretty happy these days. Amy has been in Australia for a week now and has gotten herself a job already, which she will start in March, after travelling to Albury and Adelaide first to visit friends.

Tomorrow I will go to visit Bruno and Nut for dinner and on Sunday Aing and Now will come to stay for a few days, for Aing’s graduation ceremony. She will look around the area with the intention to start some sort of business here, which is great news. It will give us a local cat sitter that we can trust!

By the time you are reading this, it’s possible you are no longer working – that might even happen as early as the end of the semester in March. Whatever happens, it will be ok, though I’m enjoying having access to almost all my income for a change.

I am still thinking too much about George and the way he is treating me but I am slowly able to push it aside, made easier by just avoiding him at work. I don’t feel anything bad towards him. He obviously feels hurt by my actions towards him, which in my mind have been fairly minimal and understated. He seems to have a higher expectation and can’t deal with that not being met. At least that’s how see it, with the little that I managed to get out of him to try and find out his true feelings.

Everything I accuse him of, I can accuse myself. It doesn’t matter. We’re just not compatible but I don’t let that interfere with staying polite.

I have written many times about my ability to keep myself (my mind) occupied and I don’t easily succumb to loneliness. I would rather be alone than struggle to maintain a difficult friendship. Perhaps this is something that I will improve on in the future but I am happy with myself the way I am. Real, good friends will find their way to each other.

Do I want to tell you anything? Just keep going. You’ve done so well to get where you are now. This year is looking bright to me, right now, with so many possibilities. Some will happen, others will wait.
I’ll go and make some music.

PS – look at your blog for this day in the past, over the years. Do you notice anything?

FutureMe – take it easy.

Ritual Of Panic – 6th February 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

There’s no rest for the wicked
And no rest for those of virtue
Adrift in a world that never sleeps
The feeling of dread is gonna get you

Gasps of dismay at faint sleights
A skin now brittle and thin
This ritual of panic has become
The default state to be in

Today I’m feeling:

Relaxed as no classes today but maybe too relaxed as I’m sleepy.

Today I’m grateful for:

The wide variety of food available especially on market days like today. I got some deep-fried fish with riceberry rice and chopped unripe mango covered with chilli fish sauce. My mouth is watering as I’m writing this!

The best thing about today was:

Sitting in House for 3 hours drinking coffee and adding blog entries, finishing off the old diary with my gig list.

Tomorrow I start adding 1983 entries and consider figuring out other gigs I went to after 1992 which is when I stopped writing them down.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Nothing has needed to be completely in my control today. It has passed by reasonably uneventfully!

Something I learned today?

The French live 6 years longer than Americans on average and work fewer hours and produce one-third more than the British. I’m not sure how this was calculated, or even true, but I’m siding with the French against my own birthplace!

What do you think gets better with age?

I’m going to treat this as what gets better as I age and that is wisdom. As it should. There’s something wrong if you are not getting wiser.

I took this picture because the dry winter has ignited a growth spurt in our cactuses. They are going crazy.

The weekend disappeared in some kind of rush of nothing in particular.
Domestication took over as I cleaned up around the house as Aing and Now arrived on Sunday morning and I should at least make everything presentable somehow.
And the biggest chore at the moment is watering the garden daily as it is so dry.
Amazing how quickly months and months of rain can disappear even in winter.
I happily received a nice online order with the release of the Ad Interim album and anticipating another release from a cool band from Istanbul that approached me recently.
And, in my endless search for interesting music, I found a band called Focusrights whom I felt immediately compelled to contact though they weren’t able to commit to anything.
I still get off on the feeling of discovery of music that gets my heart pumping.