I’m no fan of trigger warnings – this is real and happening in the world. We NEED to deal with it.
~~
without conjecture without further classifications they were HUMAN BEINGS
– two ‘girls’ – two ‘foreign’ girls – possibly ‘runaways’, ‘problem’ children
one thing can be classified though and that was the act – ‘rough fetish’ sex – (useful adverbs, not useless adjectives) yet fetish implies consent
and how do we know? because Mister E. said so casually describing how the bodies were buried in the hills outside Zoro after being strangled to death during the act.
this is no longer ‘A Serbian Film’
“please arrange payment to this Bitcoin address 3cr9tpvegeg4zg ppeddzmmc94hzusebhn”
Vows are hammered into hinges, genders stapled to locked doors. Obedient to the Bibles; The cradles are nailed to the floors. The dominion of the supreme begins in the caucasian stables; Penetrating the hearts of those white-washed brains of Western fables.
2) Religion
All the steeples report to a single inbox, apostles with Wi‑Fi, prophets push notification; Every creed is poured into the same jar, hymns auto-update to the latest revelation. Bug fixes, patch notes for heresy. Your faith, imported; kept in the cloud. Mono-denomination default settings, dual logins are disallowed.
3) Education
Orchards replanted in straight lines, discipleship needs an iron fist. Chromosome combinations unapproved will be quickly dismissed. Microscopes tilt toward Bethlehem; Maths will subtract the deviations; History will match the doctrine of the chosen ones’ observations.
4) Media
Breaking news of the devils trending as every headline lands baptised. With commentary lighting every doubt because evil is always disguised. On camera confessions sung like hymns single note songs of divine opinion; Here’s John, making the weather 100% chance of dominion.
5) Entertainment
Scripts scrubbed until jokes stop sinning, audience triggered by canned laughter Donate now and pay salvation to the never-ending hereafter. Keep the sermons and cut the kissing, rehearsed repentance on the count of four; This is the Kingdom theology that evangelised entertainment is made for.
6) Business
CFOs reassign the spreadsheet cells so that the wealth flows like a river up the hill. Coins are passed down as tidy miracles, smaller pockets are easier to fill. The market wears a crown of certainties, the tides baptised and taught not to turn. Forever and ever in expansion; Quarter’s profits are the Kingdom’s concern.
7) Government
Every sermon is a filibuster, committee meetings adjourn for prayer. Laws paved with verses that do not bend so that the illusion of choice seems fair. The New Apostolic Reformation writes the new biblical constitution, to take control of the seven mountains and be the singular institution.
Coda
They said, “Climb,” but meant, “Conquer.” Said, “Kingdom,” but meant, “Yours, then ours.” The mountains are moving without consent, replaced with unattainable ivory towers. The cathedrals make the most of the shadows; The valleys must play a game of pretend; These steeples demand your worship; The gods are just around the bend.
Don’t look now, but your church might be legitimately evil. While you’ve been paying attention to other things, the New Apostolic Reformation has been rolling its tank tracks over the skulls of both secular democracy and traditional Christianity.
If you are from the USA and perhaps even more so, if you are also Christian, I recommend reading this, even if only to share your point of view.
16th Jan 2026 – shared with dVerse OLN, hoping to get a few more eyes on this.
Today’s Daily Stoic poem:
Where, Who, What and Why
Where do you stand? Who are you today? What are you doing with yourself? Why are you doing it anyway? Superficial-sounding questions are pointing towards the deep Are you able to answer them? Or are you still asleep?
I walked down the old, sandy wooden steps to the beach I had been here decades before everything looked different but the smell was the same a salt that cleared the nose and spits in your face time and time again
I remembered the flashing lights reflected on the water all the good cheer the dream that this day will never end up before the sun patiently impatient the horizons are soon to reveal the truth
…but this Christmas I wanna die I’ve seen Satan and Jesus in a crimson-bloodied sky angel wings pummeling the city to dust
Shared with an AllPoetry.com contest by Bad Jonny, who gave us the italicised lines as starters. I decided to use both and link them. 30th Jan 2026 – Shared with dVerse OLN #400
Spark-lit dancers under crescent moon On a hilly heather discotheque The nighttime gathers the darkened gloom In the ninth house, strong intuition Vibrates in sync and to earth attune A circle storm, a drummers dreaming Through the night and to the wilds commune Seen from afar on this pale blue speck Mother Earth awaits the day’s costume
The following is a letter from December 28th, 2023, delivered today from the past
Dear FutureMe,
You turn 57 today. This is it, the downhill straight hurtling towards the finish line. Finish with a flurry, why not?
Right now I’m sitting in House, this very familiar spot, looking out into the messy garden here. My body aches from chest and arm exercises but it feels good. Slowly making this machine the way it was supposed to be. A little late….but never too late.
It’s the 28th of December, the kids all had sports day yesterday and it was a blast. So much fun for everyone. Today is a combined Christmas/New Year party day and sure to be fun too. I’ll go back to school soon and stick around for a while before heading home for a five-day break. We talked about going to Chiang Mai which I’d really like to do but being short of cash means we’ll just be at home, spending New Year’s Eve at Mum and Dad’s.
I wonder what life will bring between now and when receiving this letter. I don’t have any definite plans but Amy is planning to go to Turkey and Europe sometime this year and maybe even a quick trip back to Australia.
I’d like to get back to other parts of South East Asia again to meet friends but also need some other motive, like a band tour to tag along with. I also only have April to take a break like that without getting penalised payment at work. Let’s see.
School has been great this year and the connection I feel with my students grows exponentially as I’m introduced to a new batch each year. I really hope I can stay here in this fulfilling role for a good while.
Sat here staring at the walls Tracing back this year of ruin The picture hung now calls To settle any trouble brewing Transcendence roams these halls Embracing the silence here It’s the holy land that recalls The artist’s vision clear
Walking through the lives And visions of those long gone A tiny thought survives Where this moment must belong When this awe arrives Angels will serenade the air Unfolding before the eyes Of those chosen to be there
Great. Got up as usual and did some arm exercises, went for coffees and then headed off to meet Bruno and walk up the LiKhai Valley. After a good walk up there and a super refreshing swim in the waterfall, I felt even better. A delicious affogato at Utopia after some veggie noodles and I relaxed into a fabulous afternoon nap before preparing for guests in the evening as Amy prepared Korean food for her mum, Dad, Auntie, Nong Aun and her friend and I talked a little with everyone. A wonderful day.
Today I’m grateful for:
The lady who made vegetarian noodle soup for my lunch. To be honest it was pretty bland and tasteless but somehow it felt filling and refreshing. The lady was in the shop by herself and there weren’t many customers (probably due to the holiday) but I’m glad she was there.
The best thing about today was:
Definitely jumping in the water in the stream running down the valley. The bottom of the stream wasn’t visible and I slipped down into the water, completely submerged before breast stroking across to where the water was pouring over the rocks from above. The weather today was perfect and the water was a good (cold) temperature to refresh and revive.
Something I learned today?
After NASA banned any cooperation with China in connection with space, they are now asking for samples of moon rock that China recently brought back from there.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
As we were coming out of the valley a foreign couple that we’d seen ride by earlier stopped and asked about going to Mae Salong, so I gave them the rough directions and some advice on how long it would take and where else to go.
I loaned Amy’s dad some Kabuki comic books that I have though I doubt if he can understand them fully. He borrowed some books from me a couple of years ago and still hasn’t given them back. I reminded him again as he was taking these!
If I could relive any day from my past, which day would I choose?
This ties in with the question on Sunday about my favourite parts of the city and the walk I like in Sydney. I would relive the day that TLJ and I went exploring down there when we snuck out of the office for a long lunch. I was desperately excited with new love at that time.
I took this picture because this was the swimming hole I enjoyed getting wet in today.
It’s time to leave, time to live The tough have already got going The soft remain inactive But deep down already knowing
It’s time to go, time to be gone Let the waste remain in this place Time is forever marching on And taking up so much space
The magnetic pull unwavering Stick the cynics in the bin Tomorrow is not worth savouring If the journey doesn’t begin
Once again, inspired by this post at Spinning Visions. I am usually inspired by things I see, hear and read (more than conjuring things from the depths of my brain – at least, these days) and I’m catching up on reading Makenna’s journey via her blog.
The Blackened Screamo powercell from İstanbul, Jornada Del Muerto (featuring members of The Ousted, Burn Her Letters, ria, pembe, Noisy Sins Of The Insect, Slave Training) unveils their brand new full length “Pinturas Negras” via 11 DIY labels (see below) Mixed and Mastered by Pete Grossman at Bricktop Recording who has an excellent discography, such as Inclination, Frail Body, Uglybones, LUCA, Crowning…
Having released a cathartic and well-written debut album in 2021, the blackened screamo act Jornada Del Muerto dedicates Pinturas Negras to Goya’s “Black Paintings” in lyrical and musical ways. 14 songs for 14 paintings.
The band took it to the next level with their new release: while the band is maintaining the short-songs-with-violent-outbursts kind of approach with their songs, it is very clear that Jornada Del Muerto has given a lot of thought to the instrumentation of their new songs as the riffing and the song structures are very on point. The band makes it known to their listeners that very diverse influences are musing their sound, and Jornada Del Muerto transforms these muses into gut-punching screamo anthems with sheer explosions.
Jornada Del Muerto is Alican, Görkem, Mutlu, Onur
Recorded at PUR Music Studios Mix and Mastering by Pete Grossman at Bricktop Additional Cello by Öykü Opuz Artwork by Nazan Aydın
Sabbath Video credits Directed by Doğuş Asan & Mutlu Oral Animated by Doğuş Asan Character Design by Eda Dursun Written by Mutlu Oral & Görkem Arslan Edited by Mutlu Oral
Judith and Holofernes Video credits Video by Görkem Arslan & İdil Kocabozdoğan
Co-operative release featuring the following labels: Mevzu Records No Heroes Records Dead Red Queen Records Fresh Outbreak Records Friendly Otter 5 Feet Under Records Dingleberry Records Pumpkin Records Salto Mortale Seitan’s Hell Bike Punks tenzenmen No Funeral Records
Today I’m feeling:
Happy and content. I’m so happy that Amy is back and made our house back into a home again. Everything is clean and tidy! It’s not that I’m terribly messy and dirty but my standard and its importance is lower.
Today I’m grateful for:
Kru Jern for fixing up some things in the class attendance system for me. It’s important to have a good connection with some co-teachers because sometimes there are things that need to be done that I can’t do by myself.
The best thing about today was:
Unprompted, Kru David commented positively on my new Monotone trousers today. It’s nice to hear that though I never would expect that about my trousers as they are relatively plain when compared to some of the shirts I wear!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I have a smart kid in one class (Kwang) who suffers from a lack of direction and absent parents. She’s smart enough to avoid working hard and avoid getting in too much trouble.
This week she explained that her phone touchscreen is broken and that she can’t do my work whilst in class but promised that she would do it at home in the evening, which she then didn’t do.
As I have two old spare phones I figured I would donate one to her so she could do my work in class. I struggled to remember to find it this morning but in the end, I picked it up and found the charging cable too.
I waited for the homeroom teacher to appear in the morning and told her of my idea which she thought was a good solution. However, Kwang’s grandparents sent a message that morning that she wouldn’t be in school today!
I left the phone with the homeroom teacher as Kwang will likely show more respect for receiving it from her than from me.
Something I learned today?
Of course, surely, I learned many things today but they all seem relatively minor and inconsequential as I try to summon them here to write.
Name five ways you are quite difficult to deal with?
I still have a childish reaction to being told what to do and how to do things sometimes, even when offered in good faith and it being a better solution than what I’m trying.
I enjoy things that most people don’t and I detest many things that others seem to enjoy. I’ve softened somewhat over the years and can bear small amounts of detestability. In general, this revolves around entertainment such as music and movies mostly.
I’m happy to be by myself and don’t need much interaction to be satisfied. It’s not that I don’t like people, I really do. It’s more that I don’t find a large percentage particularly interesting and I often don’t feel like investing the time to go deep with them. Others though, will appear that immediately interest me. I can wait for them to show up.
I still sometimes struggle with changing tack after I’ve invested time and effort into the direction I’ve been going. Working in Thailand has definitely made me improve myself with this as changes can manifest with little warning.
In the past, I was quite contrarian, in connection with point 1 here. However, I would say that I am not at all outwardly like that these days, though the thoughts are still entertained internally!
I took this picture because this is an accurate reflection of my place in this world. At the walls of my palace sit the beasts and the jungle.
Conditioned to live up to the image imposed Wasting time searching for perfection Society’s dictates are not as supposed So stand tall to issue a rejection
Blow away the prejudice clouds One’s own nature is found only in fact Forget about the opinions of crowds Practice how to think and act
Words are as powerful as bricks Their poison remembered forever Fall not to the devilish tricks Of the twisted dogmas made clever
Heal the wounds held within Another’s reality can no longer touch Getting even is considered a sin And never accomplishes much
No questions asked, assumptions arise Understand and be understood The best is the one who always tries And whatever the result, it’s good
Super tired. I’m not quite ready for an early start and return to school tomorrow yet. But, that’s my new reality so it’s going to happen whether I’m ready or not.
Today I have to clean up my man cave and move back in. Amy will be happy to have me out of the house!
Today I’m grateful for:
My working desk that almost fell apart as I was trying to move it out of the house. It did break in a couple of places but there are enough bits holding everything in place that it can still be safely used.
The best thing about today was:
The satisfaction of scrubbing the floor of my man cave clean and getting it looking almost new again.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
It seems there’s a problem with my stereo that keeps muting the sound at what seems like random times. Also none of the USB ports were working on my computer after the move. I’m dealing with it by trying again tomorrow as I’ve run out of energy this evening already.
Something I learned today?
Israel’s bombing of Gaza has killed 35 UN workers helping refugees, destroyed 20 UN buildings, bombed the safe spaces they advised Gazans to go and it looks like they’ve also killed 50 Israelis that were recent hostages. It looks like they wish to completely wipeout Palestine and that will probably draw others into a bigger war.
And at the same time as the USA is arming and protecting Israel, Americans are busy killing each other in their own cities.
Can this world find any peace?
How do I utilize my strengths on a daily basis?
Patience is the main strength that I get to utilise every day. Monday to Friday at school and then back at home with Amy for the rest of the time. I don’t mean to imply that I need to be patient all the time but that it will be tested at various times during the day.
I took this picture because the pandan has really grown over the last month and outside our back door now smells delicious!
Tired but healthy. I just couldn’t make it up with my alarm and ended up with an extra couple of hours of bad sleep due to aches and pains in my shoulders from my exercise this week. But I got the washing on and have to go shopping and I’m mentally preparing for the stack of shirts to iron. I might even finish the vacuuming that I started last week but didn’t quite complete the kitchen and dining room!
Today I’m grateful for:
The Thai basil plant that Amy planted a few years ago but I was unable to keep alive since she’s been away. However, whilst pulling grass out from amongst the random cactuses we have growing I found a new Thai basil plant growing. Woohoo! I pulled the old one out and threw it over the fence and moved the new one into its place and hopefully, it will survive the move and grow as big.
The best thing about today was:
A relative feeling of accomplishment. I managed to get clothes washed and dried despite the big rain, though it did add another five shirts to the ironing pile which is something I didn’t get done today. I pulled up some grass and weeds, sorted out recycling, took it to our garage and got a haircut. Got all my shopping done too.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
It was time for my 4 or 5-month haircut (see below) as I’d been hacking at it myself recently and as I sat in the chair for the couple of minutes it takes to roll through my hair with the electric razor a big rain blew in with no end in sight. Ah well, a free shower and clothes wash for my ride home. The mountain rain is cold but the air is still warm so apart from drops stinging my face and blurring my glasses it wasn’t too uncomfortable.
Something I learned today?
By chance, I found an app called Sleepagotchi and recommended it to my sleepy struggling student. It needs a bit of setting up and perhaps a wearable device which I doubt she has but it looks like a more fun way of sleep tracking for teenagers than other apps I’ve seen. I’m trying it out to see how well it works.
What are my top three priorities for this week and why?
Finish grading my students as requested by the school. They’ve only requested to fill in 50% of the scores which is ridiculous as we have to have it all completed soon anyway. Why not just do it all? That’s what I’m doing anyway. As I’ve mentioned before grading is a farce here when no student is allowed to fail and 60% of the class must be graded 3 or more (out of four).
Pay the electricity bill, for obvious reasons. Though perhaps if someone is reading this in ten thousand years’ time and is unfamiliar with what may then be an antiquated technology, electricity is something that helps us live comfortable lives.
Get my shirts ironed. What a shit priority! Better to say; keep exercising, reading, writing, playing guitar etc. but they are all things I’m going to do anyway.
Take a view from above.
I sit in the hairdresser studying the hair across the floor. A sunburnt old man, probably younger than me is flat, laying back in the chair as the chatty hairdresser slides a cutthroat razor skilfully around his chin.
A clean tiled floor, two wooden park benches not designed for comfort for customers, and a fridge with a bag of fruit on top. Old dusty fans and faded pictures of landscapes and kings. There is so much dust on the old tape deck that it looks like it hasn’t been touched for years or would even work now.
The ubiquitous plastic chairs badly stacked next to a plastic sink in the corner, dirty from use at weddings, funerals, and dinners.
The room is full yet sparse with the rotating barber seat really the only signifier that this is a room for hairdressing.
The TV blares nonsensical (to me) words from the corner. An emotional lady talking about I don’t know what. Both the man in the chair and another old man younger than me waiting his turn are glued to the woman now tearing up but looks to me to be manufactured viewing fodder.
The little ginger cat is not sleeping here today. Where are you sleeping? Or are you chasing mice somewhere?
The stuffy air in here is filled with the hard-working old men’s sweat. Not particularly unpleasant but a positive reinforcement of satisfaction of work done. Lives worthwhile. The open windows and fan are merely feathering the hot heavy air. The stillness is reflected in everyone’s speed. There’s no hurry here.
Second in line, I’ll sit here happily waiting. I have things to do but they’ll get done when they get done.
I love the utility of this place. A room is only a hairdresser’s when there is someone cutting hair, otherwise, anything can happen here.
Am I nostalgic for poorer days, a voyeur into a past I escaped? I remember the days of make-do and mend and pulled myself sideways to avoid it. There is a sense of community in the struggle that no longer exists for those of us who found bootstraps to pull. The values of freedom and independence are a privilege that often finds us struggling still.
Remembering that the best part of the journey is what you find on the way and not what you find when you arrive pushes us onwards.
Let’s not be nostalgic, not be complacent. Let’s struggle more. Let’s revel in our simplified suffering. We are not facing life and death whilst simultaneously facing a slow life and death.
The woman on TV’s voice is quivering again and it’s my turn to get my hair cut.
I took this picture because this tells Amy exactly where I am and what I’m doing.
1994ever 