Watermelon – 13th December 2024

The fertile soils know nothing of humanity
As it is tilled into dust
Masses of molecules, ambivalent
To all the partitions discussed

Oblivious to gods, watermelons grow
In amongst the shouts
The squawks of the barbarian
Echo along the valley of doubts

Bring another flood to wash clean
The fields of blood
Plant the watermelon seeds
In this god-forsaken mud

Never mind the river or the sea
There’s no mountain owned
All the king’s horses and men
Will see the kings dethroned

Beaten Heart – 24th October 2024

And so it must be repeated…

…when the cat scratches at the door wanting to be let in
come, come

And so it must be repeated…

…when screeches of missiles fly overhead
run, run

And so it must be repeated…

…when Mama’s voice soothes the frayed edges
there, there

And so it must be repeated…

…when the fringe comes to the centre
win, win

And so it must be repeated…

…when the image of the devil is hailed as a hero
praise, praise

And so it must be repeated…

…when all the signs of dying breaths disappear
gone, gone

And so it must be repeated…

…when the locks are bolted after sunset
tight, tight

And so it must be repeated…

…when shiny ribbons emerge from the dust
curiouser and curiouser

And so it must be repeated…

…when the tide rises to overwhelm the bloodied sands
rush, rush

And so it must be repeated…

…when the swarm of flies search for new flesh
buzz buzz

And so it must be repeated…

…when the ghoulish fiends build castles on the haunted beach
higher and higher

And so it must be repeated…

…when the night breaks so does the heart
beat

beat

beat

Shared with dVerse Poetics: Of Mantras, Repetita Juvant and The Sunday Whirl Wordle 676 and inspired by this post at Sunra Rainz

The Great Satan – 1st October 2024

Now settled in for the greatest joyful genocide
Where evil is no longer ashamed to hide
Death and mutilation a spectacle cheered
No prayers answered or conscience cleared

A playground of rubble where the children lay slain
Brothers mop up the body parts that remain
Rag-dolled and ruined by murderous intent
Fires fanned by despair of the innocent

A holy hand grenade signed and sent with a laugh
Floating ashes never find peace on this path
This fertile ground may never satisfy the beast
Once the Great Satan has been unleashed

The First Time – 15th August 2024

Cloth cut and gathered
Then stitched and sown
I rented the suit and tie
She made the dress her own

A true story, my first wedding. Submitted to Weekend Writing Prompt #376 – Handmade


Today I’m feeling:

A little down with a headache behind the eyes.

I didn’t sleep particularly well and woke up at one point with a disconcerting dream where I was trying to find my friends in an AFL stadium but ended up outside, around a car parking area and went through a fire exit door that led into a dank dark wide stairwell and off to the side, a cavernous tunnel dug through the concrete, dirt and rock, the pathway littered with old beer bottles.  Obviously, a place for nefarious folks to gather. 

As I stepped through, a dodgy youngster stepped out of the shadow, saying, ‘Well, well, what have we here?  Welcome to The Pricks.’  I replied with a ‘What?’ And attempted to get back to the fire door to exit, somehow knowing and submitting to the fact that I wasn’t going to make it and my legs were as if stuck in treacle.

Unable to face my fate, I woke myself up, wondering who won the football and scared to go back to sleep.

Health:

Physical: 6
Mental: 8

Today I’m grateful for:

My old student Cake, who is in grade 10 now, is in the Science Program and aiming to be a doctor.  She took me to the stand where she was demonstrating what worms are made up of and how they work.

She looks and behaves so grown up now that last Thursday, when students don’t need to wear a uniform, I mistook her for a teacher!

Also, Jet, who showed me a little about how Instagram works and Tonaor, who showed me how to follow everyone in their class.

The best thing about today was:

Watching some of my students perform a dance routine that I had seen them practising for the last few weeks. I thought that they were just doing it for fun but I was amazed at how professional they were when they were on stage today.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I arrived back at school at 10:20 to discover that today is Science Day and many of my 10:30 grade 12 class were taking part in it and those that weren’t wanted to go and watch them.  Well, ok, I guess. 

I didn’t know anything about this (though I do know that tomorrow is another event that disrupts my classes) but I rolled with it and went to check it out for a little while too. It was pretty fun, though I’m not sure how the sexy dancing competition fit into the theme of the event but everyone seemed to be having a good time. 

After an hour, I headed back for more coffee and reading and writing ( and my final grade 8) class, asking to skip today to go to the event, but we all knew that it would be finished by then and they were just trying it on. 

I took it easy with them, though and we had a fun class practising what we did yesterday, introductions and asking conversational questions and I came up with an interesting idea for them to try next week. Basically, getting each of my grade 8 classes to go and record themselves interacting with each other, having the same type of conversations. It will push them a little and will show me who is motivated.

Something I learned today?

In the Middle Ages, what we now call a hedgehog was called an urchin. That’s a fairly useless piece of information.

I also heard about a Palestinian man who went to register the birth of his three-day-old twins and came home to find that Israel had bombed the apartment where they were staying (as they had been displaced) killing the babies, their mother (who was a well-liked doctor) and grandmother. 

Sickeningly, some Israeli online commenters said that they were happy to have taken away everything from this man.

This is how terrorists are made.

I took this picture because we had a visitor again when I got home. Uncle cowman had already chased him out one time today but there must be something good with our grass. I didn’t chase him out, hoping to get some free lawn mowing. Our cats looked on, slightly bemused.

Justin Time – 31st July 2024

He just, just, just couldn’t get it together
Metaphor not needed, no ray of sunshine
Petering out, always under the weather
He’ll be here when he’s ready, he’s Justin Time

Jimmy the door so that us fools can rush in
Do not harry him, his heart is so sublime
So mark my words, when he’s ready to begin
He’ll be here when he’s ready, he’s Justin Time

Submitted to the AllPoetry’s Expressing Yourself course; write a two-stanza poem using metaphor and Poets and Storytellers United Friday Writings #137: At the Last Minute. Inspired by an old school friend called Justin who inevitably got called Justin Time whenever he was late for something. An added bonus of a boy’s name used in each line too.


Today I’m feeling:

Sleepy with sore eyes.  Slept badly, with Tigger waking everyone up at 3 am for some unknown reason, perhaps complaining about the rain.  Reset my alarm to get an extra 30 minutes of rest and skipped exercise.

It’s another grey day to dull my aching eyes and even the kids are less enthusiastic today, amplifying the dark, depressing atmosphere.  Though kids will no doubt not be able to help themselves from being kids.  Will the adults, this adult, be able to be an adult today?

Today I’m grateful for:

Nong Spain carrying half of the workbooks for me up to the classroom this afternoon.

The best thing about today was:

Doing a little catching up with my four free hours. I got another lesson finished plus more ideas along with some reading and writing. No one thing particularly outstanding today.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Nong Praew came over to me to help her in the morning class and I guided her to the correct answers. Weirdly, I can feel my Thai improving as I’ve been helping her as she generally only speaks Thai to me unless I ask her to read.

As I was helping her, we used her phone to look up things and I noticed that she had been searching for ‘die, dead, death’ in Google, which she quickly tried to hide. She brushed it off when I asked her about it. She had also told me that she forgot to take her meds in the morning.

Anyway, after she had finished the classwork, she wanted to play but ended up annoying me enough that I left to the cafe to keep working.

In the afternoon class, she was a little concerned that she couldn’t charge her phone and would run out of battery before being able to call her mom to pick her up.

Without being able to charge her phone, a few minutes later, she became teary and I tried to calm her. I looked at her phone and she still had 8% battery left so it didn’t seem like a big deal. In her fragile state though, she couldn’t see it like that.

We did a difficult spelling test and she got deeply involved in that and then I finished up the class and she disappeared quickly.

I messaged her later about why she reacted so strongly to not having her phone charged and she said that she had to walk home. She only lives a couple of blocks from school but it was raining a little.  

I wasn’t sure whether to believe this but Kru Jern had mentioned to me that her parents indulge her in everything. In this context, her behaviour makes more sense.

Whilst I will indulge her in learning, I’ll make sure that she knows where are the boundaries.

Something I learned today?

Israel has managed to fire rockets and kill targets in other countries with remarkable precision yet somehow cannot do the same in Gaza, bombing the shit out of everything and anyone. 

This clearly shows their intentions. Things are starting to kick off and I can’t see it de-escalating soon.

Vendetta Generation – 25th July 2024

Voices trembling, yet as one to sing
A collected mind travels the crow road
Where prayers and prophets seek to bring
The moon silk dreams once borrowed

A shatter as the violence worshipped returns
A zigzag missile homes in on the heart
Faced with the darkness, the torment burns
The moon silk dreams soon fall apart

Submitted to The Sunday Whirl Wordle 664 wordlist.


Today I’m feeling:

I woke up with the light before 5 am and knew I wasn’t going to get enough sleep, so I reset my alarm for a little bit later.

Even then, I still felt like I could go back to sleep easily, even after breakfast, driving to school and coffee!

As it was a special event day today, though (Thai Language Day), I soon perked up walking around school and talking with students. There were very few classes going on, so there was a fair amount of excitement in the air.

I cancelled my grade 12 class, giving them a small assignment to do instead and took it easy with the grade 8s in the afternoon.

The best thing about today was:

Chatting with students Jee and Pemai this afternoon. It started off with their gossip about Freya and helped me understand their point of view about her behaviour.  More interesting, though, was discussing differences between schools in Thailand and the West and also talking about some of the teachers and other students that they like and admire. 

Something I learned today?

Amy’s mum has shingles on the right side of her face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen the effects before but it looks really bad and painful. I need to investigate more about it so that I can try and avoid ever having it too!

I took these pictures of Anchan and Jee because they gave speeches in Thai about the importance of education (so they told me) for today’s event.

The Horror – 2nd July 2024

Unrecognised alive
Ash and dust
Swirl around your eyes
As the grim sun starves
Flies start investigating
The first on-scene
To witness the horror

An unrecognised state
Take a breath
Before the bullet
Where revenge rises from the shadows
Books and bodies burned
On the wrong side of the fence
The olive trees have no branches

One day, one day
God’s wrath will flood the earth again

Inspired by Palestinian poet, Noor Hindi.
Submitted to Weekly Prompts -The One-Day Prompt (3)


Today I’m feeling:

Happy, though a bit undecided.  I woke up with a start, enjoying my sleep and a sexy dream (with Amy) and struggled through my first 20-minute video exercise, which made me feel good but also on the edge of over-exertion.

At school, the kids that I regularly visit in the morning were all in pretty good moods, and we chatted and played a little.  Now I’m waiting for the first coffee to kick in before heading back to school early to help Kru Tang again, and then my first class of the day with my grade 8s.

Today I’m grateful for:

Gui for allowing me credit again last month and then for getting paid and being able to pay off the debt.

The best thing about today was:

I felt a bit rushed today but still got a few things done. I got to Kru Tang at 9.30 and whilst waiting for her students to arrive, my grade 11 students were doing an online speaking exercise that instantly gave them a CEFR and IELTS score. 

I tried to help them a little bit and also thought it would be a good test to do with my other students too.

Something I learned today?

As I was leaving school yesterday, a car drove by and a shout came, ‘Hey, Teacher Shaun’.  I looked around and waved back to see ShinChan driving an old car.  This morning I saw him and asked him how old he is, to which he replied, 15!

He told me that he lives with his dad and they have a motorbike and a car.  Sometimes his dad will take the motorbike, so he has to take the car to get himself to school.

He has a motorbike license, but I don’t think he can get a car license until he is 18.  He knows to be careful, but could get caught out if someone crashes into him.

It’s good that he has taken some responsibility at an early age, and I have to chuckle a little at the way things work here.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

I caught up with Anchan briefly this morning and found out that her mum should be home in a couple of weeks’ time. That’s great news for her if it happens.

Sitting with Baipad and Fahmai this morning, Fahmai said that Baipad is smart and beautiful. I told him that Baipad doesn’t think that she is and asked him why he thought that might be. He said he couldn’t understand that, and she quickly stated, ‘I’m not confident’. Hopefully, these kind words her friends say about her are remembered and will accumulate to bring her confidence in the future. Fahmai said that he is smart and beautiful, demonstrating his confidence.

Later on I was chatting online with both of them and I asked them about whether they did anything kind today which they both found something to say about each other. Well, that’s a start.

Kids playing together, July 2024. Earn, Dena, Namthip, Nicha and Fah, my old students, now grade 9.

Chimera – 14th June 2024

A fiction in fact
Feigned and fabricated
A figment intact
An invention stated

Imagined free will
A prayer to the sky
Blessed to kill
And martyred to die

A daydream nation
A fancy illusion
Fabled creation
Another final solution

A lie is a lie

Submitted to dVerse’s Quadrille – figment


Today I’m feeling:

Contented and happy.  It’s the end of the day now, and it feels like it’s been a big, long week.  I think it may only be the second full five-day week of teaching I’ve done in the first 7 weeks of this semester so far!

But, it was a day with three different but interesting classes that I enjoyed a lot.  The first was with grade 11s, where they are putting together presentations, and I taught them about using grammar checkers and ChatGPT to spice up their content (and hopefully, they don’t get smart enough to use it to write their presentations in full!)  I was actually surprised no one in the class knew how to use it already.

They all went through their presentations again, and though they are mostly still ranging from awful to average (with a couple of very good ones) we are going through it slowly and adding, improving and practicing and I’m hoping that they can feel that they are slowly improving over the course of the semester.

After that, I did the Thai Ghosts lesson with the Hospitality/Japanese grade 11s, and they were all quite interested and keen on it, though I was happy to acquiesce to their demand to finish off the work as homework so that we could all get out for lunch a little earlier.  I had to go to the bank, too and could sneak in an extra coffee at House whilst out.

So, after the morning disappeared in a flash, it was on to my grade 8s, where all they had to do was a 30-question online quiz based on the 6 texts they’d written and previously answered comprehension questions on.  I told them that they couldn’t finish until they got more than 75%.

I can remember writing about this last year and the fact that the lazy kids who forget their books are going to get caught out as they won’t have what they need to refer to.

This year, the class did much better, and it was really enjoyable helping those that are struggling with the English and showing them how to find the answers.  I could feel them getting all serious as it was starting to dawn on them that when they’ve just been copying answers before, they haven’t developed the skills to find them for themselves.

I directed them through their books, giving them clues on where and how to find the answers, and they were all quite proud of themselves by the end.  It made us all happy.

Once home, I’ve just sat in front of the TV trying to unwind.  I’m tired but not sleepy yet.  As I’m writing this, though, I’m reminded of just what a good day it has been.

Today I’m grateful for:

Finding old videos of Ipswich Town from the 70s and 80s on YouTube and feeling all nostalgic about those days of watching football on TV with a picture quality worse than 360p.  

It’s interesting to read some of the comments of others who were around at that time too and how much respect Ipswich got for their achievements, even from fans of other teams.

The best thing about today was:

Pretty much as written above.  Very enjoyable.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

In my last class my student Ten has finally fallen out of favour with almost everyone after his closest friends have deserted himself, realising that he just treats them like shit.  They talked with me about him today, and they are struggling with it because they try to help him and encourage him, but Ten gives nothing back.

I can see clearly that he is compensating for his lack of ability to learn and develop social skills, and I can also see that my behaviour at times would have been similar.

He sulked around the classroom, not really attempting the work, and I decided to let him stay that way while I was helping others.  I asked him a few times to get started, but he just slouched off elsewhere until I found him again staring into space.

Finally, I translated for him, ‘Pick yourself up.  Look at how hard students like Nut and Namsai are trying to understand.  You can do this too.’

After about 80% of the students had finished and I started letting them go, I found Ten in the next classroom with Ploy, KanomBang and Namsai helping him, showing him what I had just shown them.  I joined in, and we all encouraged him, and by the en,d he managed to pass and felt a little better about himself.

He’s learning some big lessons right now, and it will take him a while to recover.  It will be interesting to watch.

Something I learned today?

Kru David told me that Thailand ranks something like 140th in the world for education.  I joked that there are not many more than 140 countries!  It’s sad for these kids but good for me.  I’m trying my best, and I have my own expectations, but in general, the expectations of the school won’t be that high.

Review your acts, Good and bad.

As last week, I dropped into Kru David’s least favourite class to teach (but with some of my favourite kids) and helped Nicha and Fah to try to get to grips with what was trying to be taught, which was alliteration in poetry.  They both looked perplexed and wanted to give up but were happy to let me try and explain to them so that they could at least get something from it.

Whilst I was writing something to help Nicha, she was playful and brought her eyeball up to mine and then her nose to mine and laughed and said to Fah something along the lines of ‘I almost kissed the teacher!’  I ignored it and brought her back to the writing, but it was a little weird, I guess.

I have no problem being mildly affectionate with my students in a fatherly way and Nicha could still pass for a primary student as she is so small, skinny and still a little immature in her behaviour.  But afterwards, I was thinking how I would react if she had pecked me on the lips!

I know some of these kids are testing things with me because they feel comfortable and safe to do so, but there is also a line that has to be drawn.

Anyway, Nicha and Fah went to Kru David with the bare amount of understanding but at least now had the confidence to do so, instead of running out of the class as they had been doing in past weeks.

Day 7