Tag: quote

The Tech Ghosts – 25th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The victim of these spectral slaves
Invited into our rooms
Ghosts of make-believe realities
On which this monster consumes
Mere cogs of a mega machine
Assimilated to technological production
With immediate planned obsolescence
And the means of its own destruction

We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.

Joseph Campbell

Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good, a little relaxed
Today I’m grateful for:
Kru Fluke coming to assist me in recording my voiceover for the flower festival this year. She helped me with pronunciation of the Thai words and translating with the audio guy. She didn’t really need to come and help but I appreciate that she did.
The best thing about today was:
Being around the students for the open day. We were all happy that we weren’t in classes. I was super happy that some of them were even doing the work I asked them to do!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I guess this is connected with the comment above. I asked my students to do some work for me as we didn’t have classes. I realised pretty quickly that many of them wouldn’t bother doing the work and most of them weren’t around to be able to follow up with. There was no way I could control this situation and whilst I feel a little disrespected by the students who won’t do the work out of laziness or sheer bloody-mindedness I have to let it go. So I’m thinking now about how I can reward those students who did do the work.
Name 10 people you love.
Amy
Hayden
Jochen
Kieran
Chrissie
Sharon
Aaron B
Kimi
Steve
Mum

I took this picture because there are new monsters everywhere.

What’s Not Mine – 24th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

My favourite mug smashed to pieces
Now strewn across the kitchen floor
Happened a thousand times in my mind
And so this is what I’ve prepared for

Whenever you must learn a new skill or alter your career path later in life, you reconnect with that youthful, adventurous part of yourself.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Mostly happy, a little tired.
Today I’m grateful for:
The Bath and Body Works car freshener that lost its smell in the car but I brought it inside and shoved it in the screen door and pierced it slightly so the fluid can slowly drip. In the afternoon the sun hits it and the bedroom smells great.
The best thing about today was:
Not having to teach. Can’t complain about days like that.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I was expecting to have to teach today but at the last minute realised that I wouldn’t be able to. I hastily prepared some work for my students to do in their own time and was able to feel that I wasn’t neglecting my students or just skipping out. I doubt if most will do my work so at least I can see who is conscientious at least.
Describe your family’s greatest catastrophe to date.
I suppose this would be my father dying which undoubtedly affected things around me but as I was less than two years old I can’t say that it affected me directly at the time. It’s also not possible to say how it has affected me since as I have nothing to compare it with. I don’t think there has been anything catastrophic in my life since though no doubt some things may have felt so at the time.

I took this picture because Kim didn’t really seem to mind balancing across these parts of the sofa.

Til The End – 23rd November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Make sure to watch til the end
This video needs the stats
Nothing happens at that point
As you can see within the chats

But make sure to watch til the end
Cos this video needs to go viral
A dollar for every ad served
Within this ever-downward spiral

Make sure to watch til the end
If you really want to laugh
Forget about the time you’ve wasted
Cutting your life in half

Make sure to watch til the end
Scroll and pause, pause and scroll
You’re the product in this game
And the devil wants your soul

So make sure you watch til the end…

The foundations of a free country is that your freedom to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.

Ryan Holiday

Today I’m feeling:
Reasonably happy.
Today I’m grateful for:
The old auntie at the market that made an old-style Thai dessert that is hard to come across. It’s a little like Japanese mochi, made with sticky rice and flour and other things I don’t recognise.
The best thing about today was:
Explaining some work to a couple of students and seeing the joy of understanding on their faces when it clicked for them. Small steps. Interested students are a teacher’s pleasure. Uninterested students are impossible to get through to and those moments of understanding are far fewer with them. So even a poorer student that shows interest is preferred.
Daily thought
Who is someone living that you admire?
I’ve been thinking about this off and on all day and as was commented on where I found this question, it is much easier to come up with a person that is dead. Why is that? A finished story perhaps. A life that no longer can be spoiled… I admire many of my musician friends, just for their abilities to create music that sparks me. This can apply to artists I don’t know too but the connection feels vaguer these days. This admiration is not necessarily for who these people are but for things they created, though there is a strong connection in the qualities of patience and persistence amongst other things. If I have admiration for who a person is then that would be Amy. She has her ups and downs as much as anyone but in general, is a happy person whose positivity is seen by most and I’m sure has helped guide her through life with good results. I admire her attitude. I’m not like that, not like her in that way. I wish I could be but I just can’t. It’s one of the reasons I want to be with her though. She’s a counterbalance for me.
What’s your best advice for teenagers?
The best advice is what I have learned through reading about Stoicism and understanding the dichotomy of control. As I am teaching teenagers at the moment this often comes up for them in learning about dealing with relationships and situations. It is always something I have to remind myself about every day though. I think I’ll make that a daily question for myself from tomorrow.

I took this picture because this is typical of my students in class. Today I laughed with them but actually, I feel disappointed for them. The environment is just not conducive to learning.

Your Daily Meditation – 22nd November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Let’s waste some time
Kick a ball
Forget our problems
Forget it all
Let’s watch TV
Take a nap
Rest your brain
Don’t let it snap
Breathe it in
Nice and slow
Fuck it all
And let it go

Revolution starts within each of us – in the demands we take up against the world, in the daily fight against nihilism.

Hua Hsu article about bell hooks

Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good by evening time.
Today I’m grateful for:
The psychiatrist at the hospital for not being upset with me for missing my appointment 3 months ago. The way they work here is just in the outpatient department, just get in line and wait your turn. I’m guessing most of us are just getting re-ups on prescriptions anyway. I’ve been lazy to go recently even though visits don’t usually take more than 30 minutes. If I’m feeling good again in the next few months I may cut down to half a tablet and see how it goes.
The best thing about today was:
Sitting at Daytripper, thinking about the morning, my students, my actions and my reactions. It’s a nice environment with tables of uni students around lazily studying. Usually, there will be interesting people to watch and invent stories for (only in my head). I always think about what other people’s lives consist of, even in their mundanity. I want to see and experience every boring corner of everywhere and everyone’s lives. Do we tick the same?
Daily thought
What is something that surprised you recently?
I’m not much surprised these days, to be honest. I think I need to look out for it again, otherwise, life will just feel like an endless series of disappointments.
Have you been skiing?
I haven’t. I wouldn’t have minded to try when I was younger but the cost always felt prohibitive or not worth it in my mind. It probably would have been a better option than buying a skateboard when I was 40. I gave that up at the first fall landing on my hip.

I took this picture because I noticed the foliage around the stupa has been cut down making it more visible from below and obviously making the views more open from the top. I already have a few good pictures from here before but these are even better.

Rose-Tinted Tears – 21st November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Not understanding consequences
The future impossibly vast
Fire the only guide
With no lesson from the past
Naivety is nature
For kitten and the pup
A world set in wonder
To drink from this cup
Bitter-tasting tears
Wiped from cheeks so red
Whispered-coated rumours
Of words perhaps not said
Blind lead blind in battles
Swords laid to the heart
Voices deepen in anguish
As the youth set to depart
Wisdom-thickened skin
Hardened by the aches
Practised and repeated
Then learned from those mistakes
Where did they go
Those sadder lonely days?
Reminders of a time
Enjoyed in so many ways.

The truth I believe is that silence – like darkness – is a little unnerving but unlike darkness, the apprehension comes not from the fact that it conceals but in that it reveals.

Thomas J Bevan

Today I’m feeling:
Exhausted, a little happy but a little down.
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy being back in the kitchen and cooking up a storm. Before we got home we went shopping and found some vegan pork belly cubes and Amy cooked them and they were delicious.
The best thing about today was:
Chilling at House after a reasonable first-thing morning class. The kids were fairly well-behaved and most got their work done. I got a few things done whilst drinking coffee and enjoyed relaxing.
What book are you reading right now?
Quite a few different ones but the main one is 100 Selected Stories by Anton Chekov. Only just started yesterday but the first two stories were great.

I took this picture because everyone loves a chilled dopey dog. Tokyo can get pretty bitey but I’ve learned to keep her happy and she’s often found like this.

Someone Else – 20th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Confident and handsome
A mirror, to make smiles
Smart enough to understand
Dumb enough to be ignorant
Wanting for nothing
Always in control
The best of health
Someone else

How much pain have cost the evils which have never happened!

Thomas Jefferson

Today I’m feeling:
Tired but happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Little Amy being her usual happy self. Her own energy rubs off on me and pushes me even though I’m tired. I need it. I need to move my body despite everything inside me telling me not to.
The best thing about today was:
Cleaning, moving, cutting, planting things in the garden with Amy and enjoying the fruits of our labour.
Does your family make any special dishes for the holidays?
My family? Who is that these days? Amy will make special dishes but doesn’t need a holiday to do that. This app like many things one might come across on the Internet is US-centric and is referring to Thanksgiving but this annoys me really. Most of the world does not live in the US or celebrate Thanksgiving or the genocide of indigenous populations. I felt the same in Australia when people always talked about the seasons not thinking that half the world doesn’t follow the same seasons! So, in general, in short, I guess my answer is no. With a cherry on top.

I took this picture because my student Anchan took my phone and replaced my Gloomy wallpaper with her selfies so I had to find some new Gloomy wallpaper images. I love Gloomy, and Anchan too!

Famous For Less Than 15 Minutes – 19th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

His name is in the papers
Overcome with joy
Running around excited
As a little boy
There, upon a page
Was indeed his name
A minor accident
Bought a day of fame
It surely won’t last
As other events soon came
But it was still a source
Of pride just the same

inspired by an Anton Chekov short story

Coould be worse, think of all those poor people who have to answer emails in an office all day.

from Soaring Twenties Social Club newsletter

Today I’m feeling:
Exhausted
Today I’m grateful for:
Our old vacuum cleaner that still soldiers on despite all the cat hair and mummified lizards. The floor will look good for five minutes. As soon as the cats come in from outside bringing dust, dirt and grass with them it will be back to normal.
The best thing about today was:
Talking to Hayden for a good thirty minutes. He’d received the blog posts that I’d printed out for him and we chatted about those amongst other things. It was good to share with him and I think he appreciated my sending them.
Daily thought
What would you do with the ring of Gyges?
I’d like to think I would be a guiding hand for good. Stop cats and dogs from getting run over, and somehow help people make better decisions and not get stuck with problems. Perhaps I would be a little Robin Hood too though. Try to spread the wealth and happiness around further. It’s all perilous though. Maybe there’s a set balance in the world and for every good in one place something bad would still happen somewhere else. Maybe if just be a voyeur and trying to understand the ways people think about things.
Write about your favourite/worst haircut.
I liked my hair when it covered more of my head. I liked it when it was shaggy. I always like it messy too. I liked when it was blue too but that was only for one day as Amy refused to be seen with me with my hair that way. Haha.

I took this picture because Pi’ti was looking cute here and the only places I went today we’re here at Utopia and the car wash. Not many photo opportunities there.

Squash – 18th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Some days feel so full of lack
And nothing goes right at all
Remember that you’ll be bouncing back
Just like a small black rubber ball

It is only when you meet someone of a different culture from yourself that you begin to realise what your own beliefs really are.

George Orwell, The Road To Wigan Pier

Today I’m feeling:
Good but a little frustrated.
Today I’m grateful for:
The couple of orders I received for tenzenmen products after a quick promo post a couple of days ago. I don’t sell much these days but I appreciate everyone who shows interest.
The best thing about today was:
Playing with Tangmo with the rope as I went off to the post office and market and him proudly running off and presenting the rope to the aunties back home. When I came back I rode up and collected it from auntie Sue and we both chuckled. Tangmo had gone off in search of other adventures by that time.
Daily thought
How are you going to remember to keep fighting when the storm is around you? Running away is the easy option and sometimes serves a purpose but how are you to calm yourself down in the heat of the moment and carry on?
What is your “grit” word?
A ‘grit’ word? Is this a thing now? A word to remind yourself to keep going? I could have done with that today. After leaving my class early because I was annoyed by the attitude of some students, I talked with Saipan later (she is one of the smarter, motivated ones) and told her I wasn’t happy with the classes behaviour today and she just looked at me and said ‘keep fighting ‘ like she was a wise old auntie. Keep fighting or ‘su-su’ in Thai is what everyone says to a complaint and in my mind, there’s an underlying implication of ‘shut up and get on with it.’ Maybe this is my grit word.

Someone took this picture because they need a friendly foreign face for the school promotional material and it was my turn. I seem to be looking off to the side but at least my eyes are open! The girl is JubJib, a smart one in my class who I can’t really teach as her skills far surpass many of the other students whose level I have to teach to.

God’s Deal – 17th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

It’s catching up, chasing at our heels
Kicking guts and stabbing in the feels
Lumps are growing, now we’re knowing
This is the worst of God’s shitty deals

We stand before the world, in all its majesty and torment, and say ‘we mean something’ – we, who contribute in some way toward the betterment of the world; we, who have skin in the game; we, who improve matters; we, who care. We find, to our utter astonishment, that we have faith in ourselves.

Nick Cave

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
The rain again. It’s not long since the rainy season ended but in that short time, the garden was getting parched and forcing me to water far more often than my laziness would like. But today, I can lie down and relax and watch the downpour doing the work for me.
The best thing about today was:
Taking about an hour to leave school as at every turn there were new groups of students wanting to chat. I had good conversations with many of them, my current students, my old students and even some I don’t teach.
Are you in control of your life?
As much as it is possible to be. So many factors can not be controlled and honestly, it is better that way.

I took this picture because this cutie was above the door into the bathroom at school and though the picture doesn’t show it is bigger than my hand. What a beauty.

My Cockroaches – 15th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Lizards are my cockroaches
Skittering everywhere
Hiding in dark corners
Always on a tear
Cats always chasing
Mostly without reward
Lizard shit on everything
Cannot be ignored
Second life and tailless
Laying eggs in sheets
Cute little babies run
And so it all repeats

We are so focused on improving our lives, we forget how to live them.

paraphrase Alan Watts

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Breaking routine and going to Sammakhi to meet Kamboom instead of going home straight after classes. Sometimes it takes an effort to get out of my comfort zone.
The best thing about today was:
Walking around Sammakhi with Kamboom and meeting a couple of other old students of mine. It was interesting to be on the grounds of another school and Kamboom is a good kid with a lot of potential and is in a good place to realise it. I also understand better that where I work isn’t so bad for the students when I consider that some of the old Anuban students are now at Sammakhi and they were very poorly skilled before. Sammakhi is supposed to be the better school but I imagine they also have to cater for a wide range of skill levels.
Daily thought
What are you in doubt about at the moment?
I doubt when I talk myself into it.
I have felt doubt about how things will be when Amy returns but when I’m thinking about it now I know everything will be fine.
I doubt myself on bad days at school but that turns around when the next day is fine. These doubts are good reminders though, not to take things for granted.
Who is your favourite singer or musical artist right now?
At my age, it is so difficult to answer a question like this. There’s too much information in my head, too many favourites from the past, from maybe yesterday to last week, year or decade. Why even force a decision like this? It’s a conversation question but not really a journal question. 20-year-old me wouldn’t even hesitate to answer this though. Is 55-year-old me smarter or wiser?

I took this picture because Don’s new puppy was at 22 Grams today and I haven’t met before. The same type of dog as Amy’s dad and just as bouncy and active.