Tag: Sarah

Taking A Ride – 12th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Flying far above the troubled waters
Only the wind knows where it goes
Exiting the city through deep ravines
Up across mountains where little grows

Just one more mile, one more minute
There’s safety on the other side
From one prison wall to the next
The pleasure is in taking the ride

Submitted to FFFC

Today I’m feeling:

A little rundown.  I slept a little earlier than usual and when Tigger woke us up at 5am, crying with the sunlight, I reset my alarm to skip my exercise.

When I woke I was still sleepy and soon realised I had stuffy nose and a little sore throat.  I think it is from the air pollution but I’m hoping it doesn’t turn into a cold.

I think the air pollution is also contributing to the tiredness as it perhaps inhibits enough oxygen intake and though not noticeable as the day goes by it could be having that effect.

Today I’m grateful for:

The little story I wrote below about Ozone and friends.

The best thing about today was:

The good mood of the students that were at school and then the four hour break I was able to take between classes to do some reading, writing, studying and thinking.

Something I learned today?

Whilst watching the video yesterday about RipX DAW there was mention of AI music makers so I’m giving one a go right now, Suno.ai.  

The ‘punk’ option is generic pop punk which I could guess at.  Trying to see if I can get anything weird out of it next.  

Hmm – nope.  But I don’t think that is all the fault of the AI but me not knowing how to use the prompt correctly to get what I want.  

I may try again later.  I also may not….

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

BB ran up to me this morning saying ‘Help me, help me’ and she pulled down her mask to show half an earring sticking out from her nose!  She wanted me to push it in for her!

I gave it a little push but couldn’t stand to think that I was causing her pain so told her to keep trying by herself.  I tried to find a needle for her later but to no avail.

She eventually gave up and decided to go to the shop to get it done.  Probably for the best!

Monkey girl Sarah was playing with Ozone’s wallet so I held out my hand and Sarah gave me all the notes folded up in there.  Then she unzipped the coin section and I held my hand again and she handed me all the coins.  Ozone was watching all this but didn’t complain too much, until I left with all her money in my pocket.

I went back to my classroom and Sarah appeared a couple of minutes later trying to get the money back but I sat down and held my hands over my pockets.  They begged and tickled and fought with me but I wouldn’t give the money back.  Eventually I agreed to go back and hand the money back to Ozone directly.

She was sitting in her classroom talking with her friend and I jokingly told her that I already gave the money to Sarah.  Sarah screamed that I was lying and we all laughed as I pulled out the money and handed it back.

Afterwards, I was thinking about this little game and realised that Ozone, Sarah and all feel that they can trust me. They know that it is just a game and that everything will turn out right.

Sarah took this picture yesterday and this is another monkey in her class, Praewa. Praewa came to my grade 7 class today to be with her boyfriend and it occurred to me that KanomBang from that class is a younger version of Praewa. She is a little more restrained but playful in a fun way and comfortable to play with me.

Nobody Knows – 11th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 23 Comments

“Why does Spring once again offer its green clothes?”*
A break from the darkness, sprung from where nobody knows

Clinging to warmth on those dark winter nights
Hiding under covers as daylight dallies. Nobody knows

where the world is heading, these paths to be unmuddied
Always turning, the coming and going. Nobody knows

when the lights will turn off, green concedes to the dark again
Again, again – why the black dog barks, nobody knows

These clouds shower down a ridiculous rain
As I long for the green, now gone where nobody knows

*From Pablo Neruda’s ‘Book of Questions’
Shared with dVerse Meeting The Bar, a ghazal somewhat meeting the criteria!
31st Jul 2024 – Submitted to Moonwashed Weekly Prompt

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty bright and positive.  

My lower back is sore from sitting in the cinema for three hours and this morning a bit of tooth, or porcelain (I don’t know what is mine anymore) broke off whilst eating yoghurt and has left it very sensitive.  

I have an appointment on Thursday anyway so hopefully I can hold on until then.

Today I’m grateful for:

The positive feedback that I’m getting on some of my poetry.  I’m also grateful to have found many prompt pages and ideas around poetry forms which I’m enjoying trying out.

The best thing about today was:

Watching a group of various students, some of whom I knew, bonding together as there are few students around this week.  They were bonding by playing truth or dare and a drinking game, though with an assortment of soft drinks, of course.

Still, it is obvious to me where that idea will lead.  What can I say, that’s what we all did at that age.  You live and learn, hopefully without anything untoward happening.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

It was a little annoying that all my first class turned up in the classroom this morning which meant I had to stay around for a while and babysit them, though I took time to visit the other classrooms too.  

All of them were lazily playing on their phones or making up their own ideas of fun.  

I managed to get out about 30 minutes early at least.

Something I learned today?

Britain mocked France and Egypt when they were building the Suez Canal until they realised what a benefit it was for them to be able to get to India two months quicker than previously, in case there was another uprising there.

When Egypt soon came unstuck and wanted to sell its share in the canal, Britain eagerly snapped it up.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I offered some emotional support to Praew who has become slightly isolated in her class recently. 

Also to Kwang who told me that her mum, who is in Bangkok somewhere, has blocked her phone calls.  I don’t think there is any animosity in it but it must suck to know that your mum is too occupied with other things to take your calls.

I took the motorbike for a little ride, sticking in some petrol and charging up the battery a little for Amy as she wanted to go to the market tonight but hasn’t been able to use the bike since it needing to be kick-started on its back stand. She’s too little to pull the bike up onto it though I reckon she could if she really needed to.

What is one thing I want to learn more about?

I’m watching a video about RipX DAW and reminded that I still need to learn more about using a DAW, particularly the one I already paid for (Ableton Live – which has been so long since I tried it that I had to look up what it was called!) and bought a midi keyboard to use with it.  

I’m really interested to do it but can see that it involves a lot of time investment that I don’t really have enough of at the moment.

Sarah took this picture of Ozone because she stole my phone out of my pocket as Praewa dragged me off to dance on the other side of the room. As she filled up my phone with pictures I only found three worth saving at the end of the day.

This Could Be Anywhere – 10th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 4 Comments

Child, let me take you by the hand
Angel, let me walk you home*
The future, waiting to be planned
You don’t need to walk alone

The coming is with each step
Sun rising over dusty hills
The past taught not to forget
The truth each lesson instils

Praise each day’s hidden delight
Adhere to the wisdom of the word
Now let the sunset each night
Angel, your prayers have been heard

*paraphrasing Unrest’s ‘Angel, I Will Walk You Home’. It could be argued that the first line paraphrases Ralph McTell’s Streets of London too.
Title is a line from Gallucci’s ‘You-Wrecker’.
Submitted to No Theme Thursday

Today I’m feeling:

Tired and dizzy because of an evening coffee and then many trips to the bathroom during the night along with Cap wanting to be let in and out of the bedroom a couple of times. Hopefully I don’t sleep in the cinema this afternoon!

Today I’m grateful for:

Going out to see a movie for a change.  I’m grateful that even here in North Thailand I’m not far away from a movie theatre that shows movies in English.

The best thing about today was:

Nothing stands out today in particular.  Everything has been pretty good.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I was expecting to leave at around 2pm today but Amy was hungry and said we will leave at 12.  Well, ok then.

My yearly subscription renewal for Quizizz was automatically deducted today which took out a much-needed 800 baht from my account.  

Not much I can do about that as I need the subscription so that I can continue teaching with this tool next semester.  

I am grateful that they didn’t put the price up which is what normally happens.

Something I learned today?

Okinawa used to be called Ryukyu up until the 1870s and was a tributary state to China before Japan invaded on a murderous conquest.

What made me laugh out loud today?

I don’t tend to laugh out loud much these days unless I’m playing with my students at school – they certainly make me laugh a lot.  In day-to-day life though I am…subdued…. Is that the correct word?

I like to think that I am more emotionally stable these days, as I’ve mentioned before, and not so affected by the ups and downs of my mood.

In today’s thoughts about the best thing about today, the whole day has been pleasant and relaxing without any real highlights and definitely no lows.  This is preferable for me these days.

Perhaps I do need to laugh more (outside of school) and be a bit more playful, maybe.

Sarah took this picture on Thursday because I wanted a photo with Apple, Baipad and Jan to remember them and Iphone snuck in on the right too.

Melt – 7th March 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

No melt off
Here in the tropical East
Hell’s getting hotter

Submitted to Haikai Challenge

Today I’m feeling:

Exhausted despite a long sleep.  I don’t feel good after arguing with Amy last night.  Amy also doesn’t remember some of the things we discussed last night but just remembers that she’s upset.  

She forgot part of our plan this morning for taking Cap to the vet and heading to get the truck first.  It was annoying to me as it triggered another argument last night and yet was forgotten by the morning.  

I feel dumb even writing this down.  

I should be more patient, more forgiving, more understanding.  I should be better than this and I don’t know why I behave the way I do sometimes.  

As I was drifting off to sleep last night I was reminded of what I told Baipad when she was having problems with her mum, that we ‘save our worst behaviour for the people we love the most.’  I want to change that.

Today I’m grateful for:

My job and this school, today organising a great graduation event (at least after all the boring parts were completed anyway) for grade 9s and 12s, some of whom we won’t be seeing again.  

I could feel that the students were in a celebratory mood but also with a slight tinge of sadness as life will change for them all in the next couple of months, whether moving on to university, high school or a job.

The best thing about today was:

Definitely the atmosphere in the school.  It was a relaxed party time for everyone.  

I had a lot of fun with some of my monkey students and couldn’t believe what time it was when I thought about leaving.  A few kids were also keen to introduce me to their parents. 

Days like this make the grind worthwhile.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Only a couple of minor and inconsequential things that were easily dealt with.

Something I learned today?

Starbucks is having to lay off workers as the company is being boycotted for its support of Israel.  Good.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I took Amy (and Cap) to pick up her truck and she will take Cap to the vet.  Between us, at some point today, one of us needs to pick up her mum from the hospital and take her back home.  

If I’m available then I will do it, no problem.  However, as today is the M3 and M6 graduation ceremony I don’t know exactly what times I will be able to get out.

What moment from today do I want to remember?

I want to revel in the happiness that my grade 9 students were feeling for completing their first three years of high school. 

It hasn’t been easy for them or us as teachers as they were particularly affected by pandemic restrictions and having to study online for much of their first semester together.  It took them longer to bond and get into the swing of studying once back in the classroom.  

I can still remember them and their immaturity, slowly changing into young men and women, slowly figuring out their places in their world.  It’s a fabulous feeling and I really enjoy watching it.

Some photos will help me remember too.

I took this picture because Sarah is the funniest monkey. She was a problem to deal with in grade 7 but she found her way and can still have fun but also learn some things too.

Nine Horses – 15th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

Bring me a barter
Let’s trade in the market
The nine horses
Unburdened of their wares

Wipe clean your brow
Let’s share a meal together
The nine deer
May feed us all tonight

Tell me another story
Let’s craft these words on silk
The nine monk’s poems
Will a society built

While the winds burst
Let’s change our direction
The nine dragons
Will always guide us home again

24th Jul 2024 – Submitted to dVerse – horses

Today I’m feeling:

Initially bright and energetic but then sleepy as I was driving to work. The first class went ok and kept me awake and then I almost fell asleep at the dentist’s. Looking forward to sleep tonight for sure! I wonder if I will still be sleepy then though.

Today I’m grateful for:

The dentist, for giving me a 10% discount, letting me pay $6000 baht today and the rest next month and then giving me 4 free gumbrushes.  My gums are sore now though.  

Today she cut down two of my teeth to make temporary crowns and a temporary bridge.  

Next appointment I will get the permanent bridge and then think about all the other fucked up things about my old teeth that need fixing.

The best thing about today was:

I repeated one of my lessons from yesterday with the other grade 7 class and whilst not quite as successful due to their poorer skills it still went well so I was happy with that.

Then spending some time with my old students (see below) was a lot of fun and it’s sometimes nice to not have the pressure of being the main teacher and can just try to experiment with styles of teaching or make learning fun for one or two students without having to manage the whole class.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Spending so much time at the dentist meant having to scoff two coffees down (just using one side of my mouth) and no time for reading, writing or preparing new lessons.  Getting my teeth sorted was quite a pressing need though.

Something I learned today?

The UK is in actual recession as their economy shrank 0.3% in the last quarter.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

As I was lying in the dentist’s chair I was wondering if I would be ok for my afternoon class.

I was still inspired to get back though and rushed back, grabbed everything I needed and despite getting distracted by many students walking to building ten, I was only a couple of minutes late.  However, when I got there, there were only a handful of students and they were sitting on the floor playing Uno.

They told me that most of the class were doing some singing and dancing competition this afternoon (which I had heard going on in our building) so I settled in and played a round of Uno with those who were there.

After that, I decided that I would go and help Kru Ren, who was teaching my old students from last year.

I get on well with all of them and after asking Kru Ren’s permission I helped many students to create a dialogue.  They were all very reluctant because Kru Ren isn’t strict with them but as I bounced around the room playing, helping and inspiring he got himself involved too.

I see the Thai teachers just assigning work and hoping that some of the kids do it.  I don’t blame them because of the extra tasks that they get given but it’s not something that I am very comfortable doing unless I’m tired myself and want to step off the gas a little.

What is a defining moment of my life?

I think I’ve answered this before. I could easily point to my two immigrant moves, from the UK to Australia and then from Australia to Thailand.  I could point to any of my three marriages or the special time with TLJ.  Travelling to China, to Malaysia and Singapore. 

But probably the most defining moment was something that I wasn’t even aware of and that was my dad dying when I was just 18 months old.  I can’t even say how this was a defining moment and even as I’m writing this I’m wondering if it even was.  Does it define me?  I don’t feel like I can even be defined by a single moment so perhaps all of the above apply?  I thought about this moment of my dad dying because my life would have been totally different if that event hadn’t happened.

Sarah (at front) took this picture because she is always trying to snatch my phone out of my pocket and today she succeeded. I knew she took it but I was busy talking with other students. I couldn’t find her for about five minutes and was expecting 1000 photos by the time I got my phone back. Fortunately, there weren’t too many and among the predictable shots of the floor and ceiling, I thought this one was quite nice. Sarah and her accomplice, Iphone.

Johnny Two Doors Down – 22nd December 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

It’s the offer of a night to remember
Riding around with the hood down
A petrol romance in a warm September
Exploring every corner of the town

Further out into the smaller hours
The soundtrack radio begs the stirring song
“It’s just me, you and the night flowers
We’re right where we belong”

Johnny, he’s furnished with all the skills
But the pleasure here is a book
These are a different set of thrills
A reward for the patience took

inspired by this post at Spinning Visions

Today I’m feeling:

A bit stronger than yesterday.  My exercise was easier and it put me in a bright mood which I hope continues throughout the day.  I know I’m tired but I don’t have the feeling yet.  Perhaps because I’m ‘on-the-go’.  If I sat and relaxed somewhere it might be a different matter but the plan is for no relaxation today!

Today I’m grateful for:

My lip balm.  One time a year I need it, just when the air cools and gets drier.

The best thing about today was:

In my first class, Baibua was wearing a bootleg Iron Maiden sweatshirt.  Thailand has lots of knockoffs like this and people wearing them have no idea what they mean or represent.  Anyway, I asked her if she liked Iron Maiden to which she just looked at me blank-faced.  Namfon joined and she couldn’t understand either.  Eventually, I pointed to the shirt and even knowing what I was talking about neither of them knew what Iron Maiden was.  Well, let’s do some teaching.  I searched YouTube for The Number of the Beast video and blasted it through the room speaker to everyone’s laughter and my pleasure.  What a way to start the school day.

Also, watching some of my students playing football after classes finished and chatting, and playing with everyone around.  It was a good atmosphere, everyone happy and having fun.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

There was a lot of plan-changing going on today, for things happening today and tomorrow.  I’ve gotten used to it now and don’t get annoyed at some plan that has been made that isn’t quite what I feel up for.  More than half the time the plan changes back to nothing or something I’m more interested in.  The rest of the time I just accept my fate.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I rubbed the hands of some students who were cold throughout the day.  Skinny Nicha in particular has no fat whatsoever to keep herself warm.  I told her to jump up and down which she did for a little while before hugging herself around my arm.

What are five positive characteristics about Amy?

Happiness.  I first noticed Amy at the cafe where I daily bought my double-shot cappuccino because she was always happy.  Many pretty girls were working there and I could have chosen to talk with any of them but I chose Amy.  One of the first things I said to her was ‘Why are you always so happy?’ Because it’s pretty much the opposite of my default mode at the time.  She just replied ‘I’m a happy girl.’ Well, this sounded like someone whose influence I could enjoy.

Outgoing.  Amy is somewhat extroverted but not in an obvious way.  She told me that when she was still in high school her friends couldn’t believe that she would just go up to foreigner strangers in bars and start talking with them.  She has no fear in this regard and can make friends easily.

Hardworking.  When she has a goal in mind she will work hard towards it.  From running her own business in Thailand to moving countries, studying, cooking and more lately housekeeping – she puts all she has into it.

Good with money.  Amy has always managed to budget well even in what seem like difficult circumstances. And she can still enjoy herself without fear of spending money when it makes her feel good. I’m happy for her to take care of our finances.

Loves cats (and good dogs!).  A first judgement can be made on many people by their love of animals.  A love of animals shows the ability for compassion.  Amy will do anything for our cats.

I took this picture because Hayden called me as I was talking with these students and they all shouted hello to him. I figured he might like to see his new fans, Sarah, Toey, Iphone, Pump and Ozone.

*The Week That Was – 26th March 1984

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Record of the week: Conflict – Cruise
Record of the month: Anti-Sect LP, Sex Gang Children – Children’s Prayer, Mauritia Mayer, Abyss, Confessions of Sin – Loose (Live)

26th March 1984
Woke up at 9 minutes to 8. Physics – had a go at Hayward. Maths – shit. Lunch – didn’t go for a fag. Social – messed around with Mandy and wrote a song. H.E. – had a go at Pritchard. Pissed off really. Watched some telly. Went down club – got some baccy. Bike’s not working properly. Watched Hill Street Blues.

27th March 1984
Got up at right time. Had Physics practical most of the morning. Went for a fag after it. Lunch – pissed around with Burd. Went to typing exam all afternoon. Did ok in that I think. Bus home was quite funny – it was very quiet. Look at bike to see if anything was visibly wrong. Went for a runaround – seems ok. Doing some more art – it’s coming on quite well. Enjoying The Dickies. Just about to watch 5-a-side football. Night, night.

28th March 1984
H.E – (?) with 4 years – had a chat with Sarah. Physics – organising the PCH party. Lunch – me, Jim and Burd went for a fag down in the woods. R.E – ok. English – did this play. Biz – had a chat with Julie. Maths – shit. Waiting to watch Milk Cup replay and soccer six later. Not a lot else really. Can’t wait for PCH. Liverpool 1-0 Everton. Went to sleep.

29th March 1984
Art – burnt a picture and nothing else. P.E. – played football, pissed around. Lunch – nicked some clackers (?). Should be able to get drums from Sponge. Played football. Social – did projects. Biz – did (?). English – read play. Went out to Just’s – gave cassette to his mum – he wasn’t in. Came back to Gaunts. Me, Muz, Burt and Graeme went up to Houldeys. Chased them home. Came back – typed up PCH, organising songs. Went to sleep.

30th March 1984
Assembly – snore. English – did fuck all. H.E. – wrote some songs. Maths – shit. Lunch – played football. Art – ok, new ideas for pictures. Biz – typed up PCH cos Bell wasn’t here again. Physics – pissed around – wrote a song ‘Apeshit Hayward’. Went to see Dandy. Went on over to Burd’s. Went to club with him and Ben. Went over to Roo’s – nicked his bike as he’s gone to Devon. Ben rode it, Burd on the back of me. Met Rich down at Gussage. Played cards in the Drovers. Did a smart wheelie on the way back. Burd came off the back. Came back to the club – me and Ben got chucked out. Came home. Watching horror film Dr Phibes Rises again – looks pretty silly.

31st Match 1984
Football’s not on so went to Poole. Burd and Ben were on bus – wrote song. Found out Mike doesn’t like me. Gilly was fucking following me everywhere. Met Paul and friends, still he followed. Met Simon, still he followed. Met Paul again. Finally Gilly pissed off. Got the bus back. Burd got on at Wimborne. He got off at my place. Ate some frogspawn, wrote some songs. Went to Houldey’s – tried to shit up Jamie. Put road sign in someone’s drive. Came back, recorded some stuff. Took Burd home. Came back, watched Comic Strip and some of the film. Also found out that can get some drums now. Get them on Monday.

1st April 1984
Got up. Did some typing. Chris came round. He went to get me some roly papers – told my mum he was getting some chocolates. Had some jam roly-poly. Pissed around doing fuck all. Watched TV. Went to Simon’s – didn’t stay long. He went and practised with Ian Bryant’s group. Came back, watched Spitting Image, film and Sky At Night.