Better but still tired out. I took it easy with my first class but I was still exhausted by the end of it. No exercise this morning either so that is now five days without. I will try to do it tomorrow. I usually feel better in the evenings than in the mornings though. Let’s see.
Today I’m grateful for:
My former self of last week for planning ahead and quickly making up some cards for a quick vocabulary game with my grade 10s. I wasn’t sure exactly how I was going to incorporate it in the class but I figured out a way to make it fun and engaging for everyone.
The best thing about today was:
Gradually getting my mojo back during the day and being able to not push myself or the students too much to stress ourselves out.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
With half of my grade 7 classes missing this week I’ve had to adapt myself to just playing Kahoots about the topic that we were on and making it as fun as possible whilst not putting any pressure on about punctuality and paying complete attention.
Something I learned today?
I forced myself to listen through a podcast of a couple of North American China Hawks discussing what the best way forward was for the USA to deal with China.
It reminded me that at the highest levels of Western governments, people cling to their ideology without growth or learning. Some of the commentary had me contemplating just skipping it but I wanted to hear more opposition to the things I believe and to try to understand where some people are coming from.
Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10
Anchan skipped my class today to prepare for a national (I think) competition for a speech in Thai. She sent me a message to say why she wasn’t there and I wished her the best.
She also reminded me it was her birthday today and so I bought some sweet snacks for her and her friends. They were so cheap that there were so many of them that when I got back to school and my next class, Nemo said that it was her birthday too and so I gave her one pack.
I later tracked Anchan down in another building and gave her the rest of the snacks. She laughed because there were so many but appreciated them too. Whilst I was there, many students wished her a happy birthday and I was surprised by all the people who knew her.
I can understand her popularity though. She is a smart kid who, in my own class, I have seen make friends with almost everyone, investing time in them (and calling out ones that treat others badly). I warned her once last year not to get dragged into the bad crowd and whether she heeded that or not, she worked out what was best and was still able to maintain friendships with them. I could sense what she was capable of and she has even surprised me with her skills. Except English!
I also offered to teach Baipad, along with Apple and Jan, during the holidays if they wished. I know that this will be a struggle to get them to commit to but also maybe get them to see that this is free education that they are being offered. It would also give me something else to do apart from playing XBOX for four weeks straight!
Who would I like to reconnect with?
In some ways, I’d like to reconnect with my school friends just to get memories and stories from them from when we were at school. It’s kind of interesting to discover what ever happened to everyone but at the same time, I don’t care that much either. That seems weird to write down but I’ve lived almost forty years without knowing what happened to everyone it just doesn’t seem that relevant.
I always want to connect with people in the DIY punk scene in South East Asia though and would love to find another kindred spirit in the same way that Kimi was. Parthiban in Singapore is the nearest I have but we’ve only been able to hang out one time previously.
I should also reconnect with folks in Australia, which I do do from time to time but I’m thinking I should chat with Swerve again as we spent a lot of time working on things in the late 00’s and had a lot of fun. There are also plenty of bands that I’ve worked with that I don’t have much contact with these days too. I should get back to that.
I took this picture at 7.14 am just as I was about to leave this morning. I was surprised to see clouds on the horizon and I shot this at the very first peak of the sun rising above them.
Exhausted but Amy has me up and running around again. It’s ok. It’s 1pm and it feels like I’ve done about 8 hours already. That feeling is good sometimes. Still plenty of day left.
Today I’m grateful for:
The salted caramel popcorn Amy brought back from Australia. It’s pretty good, not too sweet. There’s also a pack of chocolate-drizzled popcorn here to look forward to too.
The best thing about today was:
Pretty much everything I guess. The time has gone so quickly despite what I wrote earlier. I guess I’m trying to squeeze in the things I normally do when I’m here by myself along with all the things that I’m now doing with Amy too. I’m kinda looking forward to going to school tomorrow because I only have one class so will be able to spend time with my best friend, coffee, all morning.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
The neighbour’s kids all came and played with me yesterday whilst I was picking weeds out in the driveway. They even came with me into the entertainment area when I was hanging from the gym rings. Of course, the boys wanted a go too so I lifted them up and they grabbed on and they screamed for me to help them as they lost their grip. Today, uninvited, they came right up on our terrace whilst Amy was trying to sleep so I quietly went out and tried to keep them entertained but that lasted all of about ten seconds. After entertaining them again for a few minutes I managed to usher them away and came back inside to find Amy reluctantly awake. She wasn’t grumpy about it though. As I watched things on TV and Amy read, they snuck back and around the side of the house and started tapping on the window. Amy said not to engage with them and after a while, they got bored and went off on other adventures. I don’t mind the kids at all but our cats hate them and always run off and hide somewhere. I don’t want them coming back every day thinking they can do as they please here.
Something I learned today?
China just tested a new high-speed train that can reach 453 km/h! This could make a train trip from Beijing to Shanghai just 2 and a half hours. That’s pretty wild. I just hope that one of these things never crashes!
What is something I’ve been wanting to try, but haven’t yet?
Hmm…I think that probably the obvious choice for me now is to travel to Vietnam, Cambodia and Indonesia. This was one of the reasons for us to be located in Thailand, ease of travel in Asia. Somehow at the moment, I’m a little afraid to travel again though. I feel like I’ve lost that mojo a little. My life has been so comfortable here that I can just enjoy everything without going anywhere.
I took this picture because being a cat (with a caring owner ) has got to be the best life.Fatman report
The music store in Germany where I bought a bunch of CDs from that arrived today. More music to listen to! I’m also grateful to the band from Istanbul that contacted me to help with their 2nd album release. It’s aces and I hope I can be involved somehow.
The best thing about today was:
Feeling energetic again. I cruised along getting things mentally crossed off lists of things that needed to be done and that I wanted to do.
I also enjoyed playing with Tokyo out in her driveway as she rolled around happily. She got a little bitey but not aggressively. She’s a lovely dog that could benefit from some proper training.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Both my classes had control problems today. The first was noisy but happy and mostly doing what I asked of them. I handled it by letting them do as they wished once they’d completed their tasks.
The second class were late and after ten minutes I shut the doors and started teaching, not letting anyone else in. This meant less than half the class attended and it was excellent as I could focus my efforts on everyone. I handled the situation without getting annoyed or upset and letting the kids enjoy their choice not to be in class. It’s up to them now.
Something I learned today?
Today I consciously thought ‘ah, this is something I can write for this section today’ and now…..blank! What was it! (10 minutes later) Nope. It’s gone. I’ll probably remember sometime tomorrow. I should make a note of it straight away! Duh!
What is something I want to do for others in the coming year? I want to help musicians to spread their music further into Southeast Asia as much as I can from my remote location. I also want to help my students improve their chances of being able to go abroad by motivating them to study English more.
I took this picture because this is the Kim Chi lookalike from the hairdressers yesterday. I like that the shot is not correct, focus in the wrong place and half the head not in frame. It was an action shot. I took another picture just before this that did have everything correct but favour this one.
On Friday and Saturday, I felt very muddle-headed but thankfully woke up yesterday running at about 80% and the day felt much more enjoyable. I’d finished the cough and nose meds and just have the rib injury meds to go now. My chest is feeling generally better but I have pains in different areas than before. Also, having just been lying down or sleeping for most of the last 4 days I developed a bit of lower back pain. As I was starting to improve last night and weighed myself before bed I realise I need to push myself much more as my weight has been slowly flourishing and that’s not the direction I wish to continue. I pushed myself a little more this morning and will also do a short evening workout, I think. I certainly feel a lot better this morning and feel calm in my class of whirlwind kids. My patience was tested but I just keep reminding myself that I’m doing what I can for them. I also have to remind myself that they are still just kids, finding their way and working things out. I could be talking about myself.
If you got nothing to talk about then there’s always the weather. Over the last couple of years though, the weather has become a major conversation for most people. Extremes are getting hit everywhere. And now having said that……
It’s not just a surprise to me that it’s so cold here in North Thailand at the moment, even the locals say they’ve never felt anything like it. We all probably forgot what it was like last year. It’s a bit of a shock to the system though and apparently, this ‘winter’ cold will be over within the week. It’s actually a nice temperature but I can’t enjoy it because everyone got sick and thought it best to share it with me, so I’ve been rugged up and sleeping it off for what feels way too long. Hanging out daily with hundreds of sick kids doesn’t help much either.
Another annoying thing is that the temperature had just become appropriate to crack open the bottle of Malt Whiskey I’d been sitting on since last year. After a couple of nights of enjoyment, the sickness took hold. Maybe it’s related? When it’s not school holidays I’ve pretty much stopped drinking now, so I’m a bit out of practice. This has had some positive health effects in that I’ve lost a little bit of weight without having to do any exercise. I would like to do some exercise though but……I’m fucking sick.
Anyway, in between working and coughing I’m also in the middle of planning a ten-day or so South East Asia tour for Worlds Dirtiest Sport from France, which is basically Kevin from Trumans Water and his one-man band. I’m very excited about this. It’s a great excuse for me to get to see some other parts of Southeast Asia that I haven’t visited yet, to enjoy watching Kevin play each night and to discover the local scenes and bands there. As well as catching up with some old (and newer) friends.
Whilst doing this I also have to arrange myself a new UK passport, as that is what my Thai visa is attached to. I got this Australian passport that I’ve never used and not sure when I’ll be able to! This will mean having to make two quick trips to the British Embassy in Chiang Mai on working weekdays. This is my opportunity to use the word palaver.
those days
Dealing with the moving targets of Thai bureaucracy has hardened me somewhat to the bullshit bureaucracy I had to deal with in Australia and the UK with all the visas, passports and information requirements. This time should be a cinch. Famous last words.
these days
Gratitude Journal
I am so happy and grateful to be around the kids at school. Even if they are shitbags they never fail to make me smile many times a day. I can go home with those smiles and forget about how little they actually learned.
Did it lists
“You may not wake up tomorrow”
What did I do well today? Where were my discipline and self-control tested? Where did I do good? What did I do bad and why did this occur? Furthermore, how can I improve?
Wrote in gratitude journal.
Understood more about my students.
Prepped next week’s regular class worksheets.
Downloaded Daily Stoic Introduction and saved to Drive.
I had a nice though busy weekend and managed to cross a few things off my to-do list.
Time does seem to go too fast though and I often try to recall that feeling of being bored and struggling to think of things to do – but then using my creative mind to start something. I still have some remnants of this and now never struggle to find new ideas and activities to pursue.
We have so many more options now – not just for entertainment and relaxation but for everything. Everything is at your fingertips – when life has no struggle it can be difficult to give it meaning.
Gratitude Journal
I’m so happy and grateful to have the chance to travel around South East Asia whilst helping other people with their music. If all goes to plan I’ll be able to again in April and finally make it to Kota Kinabalu and Yogyakarta. I’m really excited and looking forward to new adventures.
14th Apr 2021 – Covid 19 pandemic spoiled these plans.
Distributed throughout South East Asia by Terr-Records.
eventos inevitáveis (2017)
daniel: bateria, voz (2,3,4,6,10), guitarra (4) murilo: guitarra (1,4,8,9,10) baixo (2,5,7) teclado (3) lamim: voz, guitarra (2,3,6,8), baixo (1,3,4,9,10)
baterias e vozes gravadas no estúdio afra (brasília) capa: leonardo oliveira (bit.ly/2xWMD9p)
South-East Asia version split cassette from Make More (Melbourne) and Leavings (Brisbane) released by Terr-Records and tenzenmen. Artwork by Errol Charles Hoffman.
[Editor’s note: Pangbianr’s man down under (actually, he lives in Beijing) Bob Blunt writes in with a report on Shaun Tenzenmen, founder of eponymous Australian DIY label/distro tenzenmen. Shaun’s one of the earliest and hardest-working proselytizers of Chinese music abroad. Between his distro, his Alternative China tumblr, his Sino-Australian Music Exchange program, and his general web omnipresence in all matters China-music-related, he is nothing short of an indispensable component of the greater Chinese rock diaspora. If you’re so inclined, you can get 30% off all Tenzenmen releases through Bandcamp during the entire month of June. And here’s Bob with some background on the man behind the Tenzenmen enterprise:]
Fans – those who love what they first hear, they find it, follow it, fuck with it, it fucks with them, then they meet friends, acquaintances, lovers, and presto- a lifetime passes and the memories are sweet, the stories are long, and no matter how many times you scratch the itch, it won’t rub out- it’s in your blood, tiger, so just enjoy it.
Fans again – the people that write fanzines, those that hunt record stores, those that collect old dusty vinyl, have crates of scratched CDs, manage their friends’ bands, and, if they are clued up enough, they may even start a label or a venue of their own, spreading some germs to different corners of the world.
Well, if you get my long-winded drift, then meet Shaun Tenzenmen, he of his own self-named label, and one responsible also for the distribution and touring of fine Chinese bands into Australia, as well as other corners of the world. He’s a trooper, a fan, and a lovely guy.
I couldn’t help first asking him if he was fucking mad to pursue such a thing and all he could say was:
“Perhaps it’s a sign of madness that I’ve never even considered the possibility. I live in Australia so it makes sense to promote music into this country though I’m pleased that I get attention from all over the world. Still, it’s not enough to make me any money, but then that’s not really my motivation.”
Bob Blunt: Of course, it isn’t your motivation, and generally it isn’t with a lot of us. We just like what we hear, and if someone else isn’t sharing the love, the motivation within us to share it somehow is the essential part of what fandom really is. Am I right?
Shaun Tenzenmen: First and foremost I’m a music fan. I’ve always liked my music a little less conventional so even in my youth I would enjoy the weirder ends of the spectrums within a specific genre. For me, it has always been about discovery, whether searching thru the racks in record stores and taking a chance at the look of a record sleeve, or scouring the internet for some obscure gem from a backwater band in a garage. There are plenty of easy ways to find Western music so it seemed less interesting to me to add to that, and instead focus on something that not many other people were doing. After moving to Australia and becoming exposed to many other different cultures, I became curious about music from the East. Japan was already known about, but how about elsewhere? I got curious, I started investigating and I started finding gems! What was particularly attractive was that some of the equivalent music scenes were still in their genesis and hadn’t become segregated by micro-genres or jaded with time. It was a return to the origins of punk and all of what was encapsulated in its ideas. Many of these musicians are dealing with the struggles of daily survival and it’s amazing to see the communities born out of this adversity. As a comparatively rich observer, I felt I could lend my support to these scenes by promoting them and making it easier for others to discover them just as I had.
Shaun left England for Australia in 1994 when he was 27, thankful that he had been exposed to a burgeoning punk scene that even made it to Dorset in the south. It was there that the seeds were sown for his love affair with punk and DIY culture, which he still can’t shake off and wouldn’t want to. Here goes his background story:
ST: Whatever romantic notions you may have about England, it’s not a great place for a young lad prone to depression to grow up in. I found solace in the punk scene as best I could living in the countryside in Dorset. During the late ’70s and early ’80s, punk was such a huge phenomenon that it had penetrated even the remotest parts of the country, so yes I’m thankful for that. I was a vocalist in a couple of bands and after growing up a little I got somewhat involved in the organization of shows with a bunch of friends. I was also writing a bit for local zines and was somewhat immersed in the DIY ethic which was born out of the Crass/anarcho-punk scene. Not really having any idea about my future at this point though, when I fell in love with an Aussie girl I accidentally found my escape!
BB: How did that transpire in Sydney then?
ST: I sought and found the local punk scene here in Sydney and quickly got involved with it, most notably putting together a complete Aussie special edition of Maximum Rocknroll. Also at this time a record label I had been involved with released some noise recordings I had made back in England and this went under the moniker of Tenzenmen – it’s a bit of a collector’s item and may finally see a re-release on cassette through a good friend in Finland. Anyway – that was the start of the name, though I wouldn’t see or use it again for another 10 years.
BB: So what spurred you on as a kid then? I’m guessing you for postpunk blood?
ST: Looking back further I can remember my mother taking me to see her boyfriend’s folk band playing in pubs around the Lake District – I was 5 years old. She had a limited music collection but I really remember the band Mud and Lonnie Donegan standing out because they were so much faster than the other things she had. Next thing I remember is I’m watching Top of the Pops, as much of the nation did every Thursday night, and these out-of-control freaks are playing “Pretty Vacant”. I tell my mum that the bass player looks like Frankenstein. I’d start taping things off the TV (cassette tape – no video back then!) and I kept listening to this track and remembering the performance. And that was it – punk rock fever set in at the tender age of 10. I was quite rigid in the music that I allowed myself to like back then and I had to sit through some awful disco music to hear the occasional punk tune, but in retrospect, I was hearing a lot of great music in that period and it all had an influence. The definition of punk was also extremely broad and that is something that has really stuck with me so it is of particular annoyance seeing kids these days just go and see one style of band play, especially on a mixed bill lineup. You don’t have to like everything you hear – but to me, it’s all punk. In fact, this is a phrase we used a lot back in England in the early ’90s as gentrification was taking place: “It’s all punk rock, innit?!”
Twenty years on from 1977 Shaun became curious about China, and particularly its influence around Sydney at that time. You indulged in all things Chinese, am I right?
ST: I started going to the library and reading whatever I could find – be it history, culture, anything. I made myself a profile on an old China Friend Finder website, signed up for [Chinese chat program] QQ and started making friends. With the help of a few of them, I took the plunge and headed over in 2001, having no idea what to expect, which in turn produced a myriad of amazing stories that I needn’t bore you or any of your readers here with. Asides what was amazing about this first trip was that it was much cheaper than I expected and I could afford to go again six months later. Of course, both these visits coincided with the May and October holidays, as that was also the only time my new-found friends had time off from work. On the second trip I picked up a weekly English-language newspaper which was only about 10 pages, but it was great to be able to find something I could actually read. In there was an article about this tiny, tiny punk scene in Beijing. Very curious, the only clue I had about it was that they hung out somewhere near a train station (whose name I forget now). Of course, I went there and only saw thousands and thousands of your everyday Chinese going about their daily lives. No pink Mohawks and no leather jackets.
Shaun then took the plunge starting Tenzenmen, and it was then that he first toured a Japanese band, Limited Express, inAustralia. Through this, he was able to garner a shitload of contacts for people to help book the shows, and then…
ST: Everyone was coming to me and asking me the same questions – who do I contact here or there to book a show. I decided to start keeping a database to share this information with everyone, and as that expanded, I started investigating who would you contact in all the Asian countries to do the same thing.
BB: And China?
ST: Through all this investigation I found out what I could about those punks in China. Through an amazing set of circumstances, I ended up back in Beijing in 2007 and went to D-22, as I had a feeling this was the place to be. And boy, it sure was. What I saw there was amazing to me. In just six short years something was born out of almost nothing. And the energy and enthusiasm were infectious – I couldn’t really believe what I was seeing and it felt like I was watching history happening. Whilst some of the music was very Western-inspired, I was pleased to see a couple of bands really push the boundaries with what they were doing. I don’t remember all the bands I saw but I reckon it was all the top ten bands at the time. Can’t believe how lucky I was to have been in the right place at the right time.
BB: Now that it has been boiling for some time now, how do you see it all evolving?
ST: This is a difficult question for me to answer as I haven’t been to China for 4 or 5 years now, and as you well know, things change constantly there. I think already there is a feeling that artists need to take more control over their own destinies. Perhaps 7 or 8 years ago there was only the dream of being signed and somehow being made famous. I think these illusions were quickly shattered as everyone, as elsewhere in the world, is struggling with how to be able to make money with music these days. Piracy culture is even more prevalent in China than elsewhere, so artists know they really need to engage with their audience. There is also the two-pronged approach to promotion with bands obviously keen to market themselves abroad, but I think increasingly now bands and artists are more aware of nurturing something locally as that is really the long game.
BB: What about punk and DIY attitudes. Is there a real voice there?
ST: Continuing on this thought about developing a local scene really plays into the punk and DIY attitudes. It’s a grassroots thing and this is how I see it surviving. There will always be artists kicking against the pricks even as others fit into the mainstream or leave through frustration. There are already small waves starting to happen in the more experimental genres (who truly fit the definition of punk these days).
The ambiguity of terms like “indie” and “alternative,” and the marketing of them at will, to some extent “punk” also, can have a blurred effect on what people’s perception of style and voice really is. Shaun has some interesting thoughts on this:
ST: DIY is a very ambiguous term these days, and will probably transform in the same way “indie” has changed over the last 30 years. For me, DIY has developed out of the early punk cultures where one took control of their own work and output, and didn’t necessarily buy into the existing systems in place which generally benefit others rather than the artists themselves. If I analyze the work I do, it is not correctly called DIY as most things I do are for the benefit of the artists. I just do my best to break even and if I don’t that’s no big issue as this is my passion. When you ask about labels I assume you mean such as “punk,” “DIY,” “indie” etc – to me these are just quick identifiers that point in the general direction of a sound but it’s all very vague these days. It’s pretty useless and pointless to debate what does and doesn’t fit into one label or another. Just listen to the music and decide if you like it or not!
But your question also begs the question about labels such as Tenzenmen or EMI etc. From my point of view, I see Tenzenmen as a literal “label,” like Heinz or Louis Vitton for example. It might help identify for people something of quality or meaning when compared with something from another label. I push artists to take as much control of their work as possible. To be honest, I shouldn’t even have to do Tenzenmen – artists can do everything for themselves! And this has become the case quite often with artists coming to me saying they already have a product, everything already paid for and ready to go – nothing for me left to do except promote and distribute. These artists are keen to be part of the Tenzenmen label because they might see it as an advantageous association or they’re happy to help build a little community of understanding around the label. (Maybe there are other factors I don’t know about – I guess it’s a question for the artists.) Either way, it’s all positive and indicative of a culture of everyone pitching in to help each other to make something happen.
BB: So what now? I mean you’re a 9-5er in an office gig, where do you get your strength and longevity to do this love of your life?
ST: I’m worse than a 9-5er – I’m generally on call 24/7/365 and often have to work over weekends too. My strength is in my passion for what I’m doing. I do question my sanity on a weekly basis, and there are a lot of things to get down over, but there always seems to be something that comes along that picks it right back up for me. Right now I’m hoping to do a 7″ with a new-ish Sydney band that I’m really excited about. It reminds me of the traditional 7″ from the late ’70s – not in sound, but in style. A two-minute infectious pop song gem on the A-side and a more experimental, longer track on the B-side, which starts to stand out the more you play it. I don’t know if this will end up on Tenzenmen, but it is things like this that keep me excited. In amongst all this, there’s so much great stuff coming from China, too.
So the main struggle is time and how to wind down. I do have the help of a friend or two now – one who sends out the weekly mail list for underground/non-commercial shows in Sydney, a list which has come out weekly for the last seven years or so. And also a young web guru who helps me out with the website and also ideas to help promote what I’m doing. Ideally, I’d love to be able to start working with someone who has the same keen attitude who could keep Tenzenmen going as my involvement drops off, as I have plans to go live in South East Asia myself and kick back if I can remember how. Otherwise, I think I might have to draw a line in the sand sometime in the next few years and say, that’s it for the label for now.
[Editor’s note: I’ve been sitting on this article for far too long. In that time Tenzenmen has pivoted in the direction of focusing even more exclusively on Chinese music. I asked Bob to oblige my sluggishness in posting this by hitting Shaun up with a few quick followups:]
ST: As for now I’m pretty much doing what I’ve always been doing — helping with distributing Maybe Mars and Genjing products around Australia.
BB: A labor of love hey?
ST: It’s what it is. That’s not to say there’s no interest. I mean it is still a niche thing. As always there are things in the pipeline and who knows what is in store for this year. But really I’ve been seeing and feeling that for the last 2 or 3 years.
BB: What do you mean by that?
ST: What I mean is that things grow fairly organically and at a steady rate, but obviously not fast enough for me to make a fortune and retire though…
After Michael Crafter toured South East Asia, they met SMG and fell in love, decided to make things official (grind-style) and release a split 7″. Both sides features songs written and inspired by the S.E.A. DIY scene. For lovers of mincing, power, mincecore, violence and vibes.