Take your time, try not to forget – 4th December 2019

How has a failure set you up for future success?

When I was studying to learn to teach I was doing well in the first week but failed the initial assignment, eventually being given a pass. Then I failed the second assignment, eventually passing. Same with the 3rd and 4th. Initially discouraging I persisted until passing.

Those failures taught me about trying my best, not giving up. Now, when I have a bad day teaching I can consider all the factors and try my hardest to make improvements.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Amy again as she has soldiered on and cooked for me when I’m feeling under the weather but she is also not well. Today suddenly I have an urge to visit England again.

21st Apr 2021 – Just pre-Covid, this bug knocked me down for about 10 to 14 days and was by far the worst I’ve felt with the flu in the last few years. It’s unlikely that it was Covid and I think I eventually got rid of it and passed it on to others. I seem to remember a lot of people getting sick around this time.

Nervous, I’m nervous, so nervous – 18th January 2018

Don’t complain about the weather.  Don’t complain about the weather.  Don’t complain about the weather.  It’s boring!

Faaaaark it’s hot!

It was 42 degrees today here in Adelaide.  Luckily I slept through it and it was only 41 degrees when I woke up at 5pm.  Dropped down nicely to 31 degrees when I went out for my walk at 10.30pm.

Yes, it’s boring to talk about the weather.  But when you live in Australia and plan to move to Thailand it’s quite a relevant topic.  I didn’t own a jacket for the first 7 years of living in Australia, and I only had one after that because it was a present from a girlfriend.  I do appreciate some warmer clothes during the winter here these days though, these old bones are getting creakier. I have seen frost in Sydney once too – about 12 years ago.

Amy has suffered through the Thai winter where there is a regular annual news item about how could it is each year.  This year the lowest overnight temperature was around 8 degrees.  Looks like I might still need a jacket then.  For the two weeks that it lasts anyway.  Kind of the reverse to an English summer.

I’m promising myself not to ever complain about hot it is in Thailand.  Let’s see how long that lasts.

Front

Amy has gone from bored-to-stressed in 24 hours, as she has been running around dealing with the people who will build our kitchen and walk-in wardrobe.  Figuring out who will build our bed base design and special wardrobe in the second bedroom.  Expanding the outdoor kitchen area and deciding to put the washing machine out there and renaming the laundry to Amy’s craft room.  Choosing the wall paints and figuring the guys building our fence deserve a bottle of rice whisky when they finish – to keep in their good books if we need any other help in the future.

Back

Hopefully, the paint goes on in the next few days so Amy can see how everything will look and change anything before it’s too late if she decides.  It’s still so weird for me to be here just looking at photos and only being able to visualise living in a finished house, rather than be involved with its development so closely.  I hope I like it!

Fence

I emailed off my application for the CELTA course in Chiang Mai, starting in April, after Songkran.  They wrote back quickly and I’ll need to do an interview with them sometime soon.  I want to do a video interview but need to make sure the internet is stable enough.  I also need to be on top form and with only have a day and a half break between shift changes again this week I can pretty safely assume I won’t be up for it.  As well as this, I’ll be moving house on Tuesday evening and there won’t be any internet connectivity for a week or so.  I guess by then though I should have a long enough break to be alert enough to what I already know will be a difficult interview.

I’m just a little petrified about my ability to do this course – it’s been so long since I’ve been in a study situation where I’ve had to actually care about what I’ll be learning.  I was sent on so many useless courses in my old job that I never really paid much attention. I know my focus and concentration is not as good as it used to be too.

But hopefully, with a more meaningful result and benefit at the end of the course as the reward, I will be motivated enough to push on through and do my best.  I really want to learn to do something that has more meaning, to myself and to others.  I hope that I can be a good English teacher, and a great mentor to those I will end up teaching.

Once done I’ll start investigating opportunities to work in schools and also to do some private tuition, which I think will be what I might end up doing longer term, once I’ve done a couple of years to get a good grounding on the best way to do things.

I’m still nervous though.  If I can’t pass the course, what will I end up doing?  I do take comfort in the knowledge that other of friends have passed so if they can do it, so can I!

 

*Damn you! – 8th September 1998

Email with TLJ

S: It’s 8.28 and I’m thinking about you sweety. I been thinking about you all night and all morning. Hope you got to uni OK and that you can concentrate today. Did I mention the pills. I’m sure you haven’t forgotten anyway.
Call me when you can. I would dearly like to see you later even if only to drop you home. Let me know what you think.
Your best friend

T: well i took the pills and feel pretty awful now. I’m getting worried cause i seem to be having bad luck lately.

T: ok, so i’m supposed to be in D D/b right now, but i’m not – so????? if I had got to uni at 2 instead of 3 (because someone refused to drop me) then i might have considered it. anyway i got there and looked at the back row it was so funny. marty was sitting reading the uni newspaper, joe was asleep with his head against the wall, and jeff was asleep and sprawled over his desk – all three sitting there together. marty said the harbour cruise was the best fun. couldn’t find sue di or tu at the lecture, they had all just left.
sandie’s keen on her friend’s friend – tell you about it later.
bored….
catch ya babe

S: Sorry you are in such a bad mood but it really is NOT MY FAULT!!!
Why’d you get there so late? And I didn’t refuse to take you – you pleaded with me not to bother……

S: Thanks for calling last night. I’m sorry I was real tired. I didn’t feel at all good. I went to bed at 11 and didn’t even read a comic before going to sleep. I just got home whacked some stuff in the oven, ate, watched TV for ten minutes and went to bed. My neck is still really sore causing me grief in my eyes. My right leg hurts too. Weird. Thinking about you all the time. love you muchly. Speak to you when you can.

*Yes – 7th September 1998

Email with TLJ

S: You know Yes is my favouritist word. I think I got da bug – I got running things out my behind and I think I have go to the toilet now and my big fat tum aches inside. I know the cure so come rub me better. Thinking, dreaming of you always and what you are and who you be and what it means to me. Angel like, that’s you

T: in a rush, gotta go, just writing to let you know how much i like you. i like you very much – love even, well maybe.

T: well, di wants to go shoppng instead of working,

S: She’s such a girl

T: so i’m gonna exchange my dad’s shoes

S: and she’s conned you into going shopping too right

T: and then probably go home (or to your place) to do some work.

S: Yes,yes,yaasss

T: I’m really worried about marketing now, cause we actually have to do 9 chapters!!!!!

S: Don’t worry – you’ll be cool -I’ll leave you alone OK.

T: anyway, tu split up the chapters between us, so i only have to do chapter 8. but i still won’t feel comfortable not having summarised all the chapters myself!

S: Yeah, I agree – well read it all and you will explain it to me.

T: how did the ultrasound go? hope you’re ok babe.

S: I’m OK aren’t I?

T: love tlj

S: I want your love

*All right – 1st September 1998

Email with TLJ

S: Hey sweety I’m missing you and wanna make things good with you. Wanna know you’re all right with everything. Want you to know that I think you’re great, happy and full of life. (We all have our bad days – me particularly)
Love to you

T: you know what? whatever.
No only kidding – just knew that would piss you off.

S: Hang on – I’ve put my sense of humour down here somewhere….

T: Planning on going shopping with sue, di, and tu in about 1/2 an hour.

S: Window shopping I hope. Or a present for me of course.

T: josh asked if that guy on friday night was anything special,

S: Tell me the truth – is he?

T: and made a reference to Jack (whom he has heard a bit about from nat) – i think I said something bitchy though to cover up. anyway, he’s moving out with jay and joe to Newtown tomorrow. sue, di and tu asked if i wanted to go white water rafting in october – i’ll think about it, though it’s 90 dollars + you have to find transport (can get a lift with sue and di, or you wanna drop me? i think it’s at Shoalhaven or something).

S: You know I can drop you – can I come too – or is that a girl thing too (or a uni thing). I think I’d like to be in a dingy with three beautiful teenage girls (hang on I’m just going to the toilet).

T: Shaun also offered to pay for josh’s skydiving ticket!

S: OK – will he pay for me too? (and I’ll promise to be his friend)

T: no, things are good with me, i only wanted to spend the night together and really have fun – no worries or anything.

S: We’ll have a long hot bath – I’ll massage you and you can fall asleep in my arms.

T: di can’t make tomorrow girlie thing, so i may be able to see you.

S: Oh, but I’m seeing Di…oops! No no that would be cool. I look forward to it.

T: As well, i may try dropping around to marty’s party, or maybe even newtown to see triple J’s (get it) new house.

S: I can always drop you there too sweety.

T: Sunday’s out though, cause i may be getting together with di to work on IS & OD. and monday night, we may be having our girlie night (if mum lets me).

S: Oh well. If you can you can if you can’t you can’t – no sweat. You know I’ll be waiting for you.

T: anyway, what are your plans?

S: I might try and get a swim in this weekend actually – otherwise more work on the equipment and some noise plus comic reading and taking it easy.

T: love tlj
ps – i’m wearing his pants for her………….

S: Can I wear your pants…
Hope you get this – our mail server is fucked today

T: ok, so we didn’t get to go shopping but i’ll be going after the marketing lecture til 5, and then i’ll come see you at about 6pm at the physio.
we were talking instead and boy have i got some juicy goss to tell you! the best!
catch ya babe

*I hope – 31st August 1998

Email with TLJ

T: we can see each other tonight and that would make us both feel better.
had an awful dream last night. They’re still looking for people to lab assist comp prac – or a subject similar to it. They want 9-1 on fri morning’s. If i could move my marketing principles tute, i could make it 2 hours, although i will miss out 1/2 hour of IS &OD either way! DAMN! and i’m in marketing principles with all my friends and we’re doing the group assignments together (sue, tu, di, me and jeff!)

S: Hey – I feel good anyway. Don’t you? I can make you feel better (I think!). Anyway – I hope I can see you too. Meet me at the physio as soon as you can – maybe we can go get a coffee somewhere? Sorry about your dream (Can I make it better?)
Cheer up Miss Blue – I’ll be here for you (no expectations no demands plenty of rope)