Tag: teaching

History Now – 8th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

You don’t need to worry about the future 
If you made your foundations solid today
Soon this day is done, there’s only looking back
And reflecting on how you got along this way
Say to yourself that you work and you exist
And it’s some kind of history you’re making
What’s done is done and all is set
That’s the future that you’ve been creating

Today I’m feeling:

Struggled to get up as sleep was interrupted a little by being too hot but once I settled in to exercise my body started to feel good and ready to go. My mind followed suit. I’m writing this as I’m stuck up on stage waiting for this ceremony to finish but I’m not resentful or bothered about being here. Rather than feeling like a waste of time I can read or write in relative peace. The two quick coffees I downed before getting here probably helped a lot too.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Karn dragging me up onto the stage for the ceremony today. Although I didn’t understand anything it was nice to watch the traditional Thai dance and the beautiful song that was sung. And then Kru Karn asked if I wanted to leave as she said she had class so I managed to escape before it got too boring. A nice way to start the morning.

The best thing about today was:

In the morning, my body feeling good after exercise and my brain feeling good after coffee. Hearing the song the children sang and chatting with Kru Karn, meeting many of my students in a slightly different setting than normal outside the classroom.
In the afternoon, enjoying dealing with my last class for the day and at least making it a little enjoyable for those that are still struggling to understand. Even the students I mildly punish left smiling. Chatting with Kru Fluke and Kru Fang and then gossiping with some of the students before enjoying the drive home listening to a podcast about Killing Joke’s first album.
In the evening, before running out of energy, I enjoyed revisiting the rest of the day.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

When I got home around 4 pm I dashed out to go and get the fried fish from the walking street that I usually enjoy but they either weren’t there today or I was too early so I came home empty-handed and had a quick microwave spaghetti meal which wasn’t really enough so I had some pomelo and then some raisins with rice crackers. Even then I didn’t feel sated. 
Around 7 pm I suddenly ran out of energy and feel exhausted and spent. There are a few things I’d like to be doing but feel like I may have to just go to bed. I don’t feel sleepy, I kinda don’t feel anything.

Something I learned today?

I learned that some states in the USA are suing Hyundai and Kia (I think) for their cars being too easy to steal! Now those companies have to keep some hundreds of millions of dollars in reserve for possible compensation claims.  Totally ridiculous!

Where did I make progress?

I made a little progress with my Thai learning and also with my classes. A little progress with working my abs and hanging for 15 seconds a couple of times a day. This progress is slow and steady and is the best type of progress.

How has my personality changed or evolved over time?

I would say I have followed a fairly traditional evolution of personality, gaining wisdom through reflection and not being in such a hurry as in my youth. I’ve learned better control of my emotions, though that has been a long hard road to navigate.

I took this picture because today is ‘respect the teachers’ day and although I was going to skip out I ended up getting dragged up on stage with everyone. I watched the beautiful dance but better still was a choir who sang a really nice Thai song. It made me think about learning some Thai songs to help with language learning.

Three Rivers – 7th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Stepping into the river of joy
I’m held high with its pleasure
Even taken up to the heavens
Where our gods now take their leisure

Dragged along in the river of grief
The weight forever bearing down
Can I push my toes against the mud
Swirling dark yellow and brown?

Rowing around the river of need
Searching for a friend and destination
Sometimes smooth, sometimes wild
Within an insatiable compellation

inspired by Red Hand Files #248 (I think)

Today I’m feeling:

Good all day. Nothing got in my way. No annoying students, no annoying adults. Not even the crappy coffee in the school cafe could get me down as I rose with the caffeine hit.

Today I’m grateful for:

One of my new M4 (grade 10) students asking me if I would still be teaching her class next year. I said I didn’t think so but didn’t know for sure. She said she wanted me to teach her next year too! I’ve been teaching her for three weeks! Sometimes I wonder exactly how these kids see me through all their different eyes. I’m grateful to all of them for all that they teach me.

The best thing about today was:

Amongst many things, the clouds and sun on the mountains as I was driving home this afternoon. Huge white sunlit clouds towered above lower-level rain clouds across the mountain tops and then some valleys were highlighted with sunshine reminding me of a Miyazaki anime, all topped with a fan of rays further into the blue skies up high. Just six or so weeks ago all this looked like a nuclear winter and now it is magical. What you see has a big effect on mental health.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’ve been getting parents’ email addresses from my class’s homeroom teacher if they would like an email to see how their children are doing in my class. I got information quickly and easily from a couple of teachers but another tried to palm me off perhaps not quite understanding what I wanted.
When I asked them again today they told me that most of their parents don’t have email addresses which is just a plain untruth and indicates to me that they just can’t be bothered or don’t want to help.
Maybe they are concerned that parents will start asking them more about their own classes. I know the teachers here are given ridiculous tasks to do all the time so sometimes it doesn’t surprise me that their focus is on themselves and not the students.
It’s also true that many parents of students at this school don’t care about their kid’s work or how they are doing. One annoying foreign teacher isn’t going to fix everything. But I’ll settle for anything.

Something I learned today?

I saw a review of the Apple Vision Pro headset which looks pretty interesting with some amazing technology. It’s not something that I would buy right now but perhaps after it got to a later generation and fitted in with what I would like a computer to do. Being able to read a comic or book just by moving your eyes would be cool. As it develops I’m sure more exciting uses will come to light for it.

What do I know for sure?

Honestly, the only thing I am sure of is that I’m going to die, everyone and every living thing I know too. Anything else is up for question.

What qualities do I want to embody in my daily life?

Honesty, caring, love, gratitude, understanding, empathy, kindness….all the words from all the self-help books.

I took this picture yesterday because, much like today, the clouds, sky and mountains were making me feel joyful.

Crop Rotations – 6th June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Living happily as hunters
Roaming around with a herd
Someone planted a seed
And no one said a word
Toiling away ever harder
For a minimal return
There’s no going back now
We will never unlearn
Now our tribes grew bigger
Each and everyone breaking backs
And then foul weather ensures
You’ll never again relax
An arrogant virus we are
Thinking to tame this land
We made ourselves slaves
Without it ever being planned

Today I’m feeling:

Good, all day. My annoying students were annoying but didn’t annoy me. Annoying adults didn’t annoy me and annoying technical problems didn’t annoy me. I feel satisfaction today.

Today I’m grateful for:

My eyesight and the fact that I didn’t go blind from the gunk that hurt my eyes last night.

The best thing about today was:

Nothing stands out above anything else really. These are the best kinds of days and I would like more of them!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I feel stuck for words today. Everything has gone well today and that doesn’t mean that everything went the way I wanted but that anything that didn’t I could mentally accept and not let it bother me. As my air con didn’t work last night I still slept ok but didn’t feel so refreshed when I woke up in the 29-degree bedroom. Abs exercise soon woke me up. I was so into what I was doing in class this morning that I forgot it was only for one hour, thinking that we had one more to go! Considering my skin felt like it was burning and was actually blistering by the time I got home I didn’t even really think about it throughout most of the day.

Something I learned today?

Good days sometimes creep up on you unawares.

What is the greatest life lesson I’ve learned?

Patience. When I was younger I was patient with some things and then wildly impatient with others. As I’ve gotten older I have managed to get almost everything I might have been impatient for before under control. It is hard to teach patience to children. They are not designed to comprehend it yet.

I took this picture because this is the tree/plant that has covered me with its sap that is now burning my skin everywhere. An uncomfortable night last night as the aircon stopped working again and the two fans I was using were next to useless in keeping me cool, even whilst sucking in cooler air from outside.

The Safest Space – 2nd June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

In my orbit, looking down
Twenty-six thousand kilometres per hour
Is the earth spinning?
Am I moving?
It’s safe up here
In the most dangerous place
Nearly on earth
Nearby goes Elon’s debris
Who was he when he was alive?
I have so many questions
Like why won’t they let me return?
Unable to experience the thrill of danger
With feet back on the ground
I remember the old pictures
From encyclopedias tattered and worn
The lights of humanity
Turning on in darkness…

Today I’m feeling:

A little tired, it took a bit of effort to not snooze my alarm but I got going and did some chest exercises again along with a distracted meditation. A cold shower and breakfast and I got going, feeling good and upbeat.

Today I’m grateful for:

Paul (Fatty) for contacting me to advise he’ll put out a vinyl album of Atrox, the band I was thrilled to join back in 1984 or 1985. I didn’t do any studio recording with them but there are a couple of live tapes with me and maybe he will use some of those. I’m cool with the idea though joked about having two hundred copies left over under his bed. We also admitted that neither of us even owns record players anymore!

The best thing about today was:

At lunchtime, I came back to school a little early from House where I’d enjoyed coffees after my morning class. I went over to the new building where the little store is to buy some rice crackers and my new grade 10 students shouted to me from the third floor.
With an hour to spare, I went up to meet them and they were in good spirits as their teacher hadn’t shown up for their class. They had lots of fun interrogating me about tattoos and piercings and they seemed happy and comfortable to be able to talk with me.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I got frustrated at my last class of students as they were all spread out around the room shouting ‘teacher, teacher ‘ whilst I was trying to sort things out. I banged the table really hard and shouted at them to be quiet and if they had a problem they need to come and ask me not just shout from where they are. I asked them if they treated their parents like this at home shouting for help from their bedroom. They were stunned into silence.
Though I was loud and a little angry at the behaviour, I wasn’t upset and smiled at them for being quiet. The rest of the class went ok after that and I think they get it now, more than last year. They have a little better understanding of the limits with me and more self-control.
Whilst this was going on Noah and little Nicha were nagging me to go to the bathroom but I had asked them to wait whilst I checked their phones were set up correctly. I’d just sent them off when I had my meltdown. I came over to help Nicha after they got back and she looked very upset and Noah said she wasn’t feeling well. They were still around at the end of class and Nicha was adjusting her skirt with Noah’s help. Nicha picked up another skirt and said ‘teacher, look’ and there was blood on it. She had borrowed another skirt from a classmate. I told her not to worry, that it happens sometimes and it’s just a normal thing and Noah said the same to try and comfort her.
As with many situations with kids she soon appeared to get over it and was laughing and playing about twenty minutes later in the playground. After all this excitement though I realised that I had hurt my vocal cords shouting so loudly and I’m pretty sure my throat will be sore in the morning and I just hope it doesn’t lead to a cold or flu.

Something I learned today?

When I got home and sat down to eat, a video recommendation on youtube came up about classroom management that was totally appropriate to my day. I’m not sure I need to implement the good ideas from it just yet but it also made me realise that I do have a great rapport with about 90% of the students in each of my classes and we can and will work out the classroom together.

What am I looking forward to this month?

I look forward to every day. I look forward to nothing in particular. When I look back I can see forward.

Amy’s friend took this picture as part of a video because she was impressed that Amy could sing Aussie karaoke in the pub so well. In the picture is another Amy that my little Amy met and they decided to do this duet which I think was a Fleetwood Mac song.

Cheers Big Ears – 1st June 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Fighting over artificial instincts
Whilst slowly marching to unity
We come together as we fall apart
Unable to counter inevitable entropy

Fighting it is fighting oneself
Let’s all move this thing along
A cheer for you is a cheer for me
Hear the harmony within its song

Today I’m feeling:

Sweaty and in a good mood. A little tired and looking forward to the weekend, finding out Monday is yet another holiday. I also feel a little cautious and cynical in that things are going well and that I must be prepared for anything that might happen to upset that. Do I deserve to feel so content?

Today I’m grateful for:

The lady at the market for giving me a 10 baht discount as I’ve been to buy food there twice this week and bring my own plastic bag too. Maybe I’ll try and learn her name next time.

The best thing about today was:

Getting through it without much hassle. Thursday is three two-hour classes with only one one-hour gap in there. The struggling kids I was able to help along with the assistance of some of the better students in each. It gives a feeling of teamwork and camaraderie that I hope continues. The kids have learned quickly that they can have fun with me but that they also need to get things done too.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Can’t think of much again today except running out of time to do all the things I might like to do. It’s not that big a deal. 

Something I learned today?

I finally gave in to having Amy teach me some Thai. I’m at a level now where she seems a little bit impressed that I remember and have learned a lot of new things and that I’m also a little more confident too. I learned easy and difficult (ง่าย and ยาก), strong and weak (แข็งแรง and อ่อนแอ), thick and thin (หนา and บาง).

What are my priorities for this month?

Pretty much just school and the classroom for work and then to do more regular learning of Thai.
There are a few other things that are on my mental list that would be best to get done such as getting the car cleaned and the bike serviced.

I took this picture because I drive past this tree every day on my way home. I’m usually in too much of a hurry to stop and take a photo so I deliberately took the time at lunch to go and take this one. It feels like it is telling a story.

Soundbyte Generation – 29th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

SO … ten seconds … pass
UND … er the joker’s … glance
BY … the power up … above
TE …. ll him he’s … dreaming!
GEN … tle into the … night
ER … ror code … repeating
AT … death’s end, soon … here
I … wonder what … happened
ON … those days gone … by

1st Apr 2024 – Submitted to RagTag Daily Prompt

Today I’m feeling:

As I slept so early last night I woke up at around 5 am with the sunrise. That wasn’t enough to get me up though. However, I’d left the aircon on high and although I think it is only working as a fan it was sucking in cold air from outside and I was starting to shiver. I turned it off and tried getting back to sleep and just as the start of my dream felt like it was going to get interesting my alarm went off.

I got up, stiff and in some pain. I think the topple off the bike yesterday jarred something badly in my upper back and it’s pretty sore. Some exercise couldn’t loosen it up either. It’s the kind of sharp pain that stings with almost any movement and will be annoying all day. But I feel good, energised by seeing all the crazy kids and their stories this morning. Now I’m waiting at immigration for my 90-day report.

Today I’m grateful for:

Right now (whilst I’m at school) I’m grateful for the light rain and the anticipation of seeing how well (or more accurately, how badly) the tape on the gutter is working out. I hope it can at least hold some of the water back. (Later – seems it didn’t rain at home!)
I’m also grateful to the neighbours who swept up the grass that I had cut in the road. I was too stuffed to do it at the time and I was surprised this morning to see it all gone!

The best thing about today was:

Feeling happy and wanted at school. I feel that students appreciate that I am close with and care about them and that whilst breaking down the student-teacher barrier they still have respect for me. 
I think some teachers don’t like my style in this way but it is something that helps me to enjoy the time that I am in school and I feel more closely connected with the kids than with other teachers. 
I mentioned this to Bruno yesterday, that I can’t connect with many other adults here because I find them and their lives boring and that the pleasure I get from being around the kids derives from their unpredictable energy and ideas. 
Sure, I miss being in that youthful state (minus the depression of course) so what better way to relive it than through the lives of my students?

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Recently whilst learning guitar, I’ve been playing along in the Yousician app for up to 30 minutes and then loading some of my favourite songs in Capo and playing the chords along with them so some days I might end up playing for 90 minutes or more.
Today I was getting frustrated with Yousician and not being able to play something until getting it right. Sometimes I feel like my fingers are working without me thinking and when I realise that I start thinking about it and then screw up!
Today I just couldn’t push through and wanted to stop. But after a minute or two I loaded some songs into Capo and after playing along to about five I started feeling more positive again. Like anything I guess, some days it’s pleasure and other days it’s pain.

Something I learned today?

I got a message from my old student Boss (the boy I took to the psychiatrist last semester). He messages me about once a week since he started at a new school but today surprised me by saying that he’s come back. I’m not sure why yet but I can guess maybe it was more stressful there. 
Our school is super relaxed in comparison with others and I think it doesn’t help prepare students for the tougher realities of life once they leave, even just to other local schools.
It’s good for me in that I don’t need to be so rigid either. 
Anyway, I’ll get his story soon enough no doubt.

What would I like to accomplish this week?

This week I hope to figure out the best way forward with using Quizizz in my classes, without having to change what I’ve already done. I think a clearer way forward will appear over time so that I tighten up my lessons overall.
I could set some targets for this or that but I think I’m doing well with all the little tasks I submit myself to every day without having to add too much more. 
I guess I’d like to get this tightness out of my upper back by the end of the week though by tomorrow would be preferable.
Maybe I could get down to under 80kg before bedtime this week. I’ve been slowly moving in that direction for the last week or two.

I took this picture because it makes no sense to me. Tattoo and bakery? And all I’ve ever seen there is a small of street food kra pao dishes! Maybe it doubles as a nifty trendy bread and tattoo shop in the evenings!?

Writing For Myself – 25th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 6 Comments

The words I write, they are for me
Sure to be making assumptions
We are brothers and sisters in arms
(and anyone that cares to fall between)

Sometimes listening to the wind
Eases my burden, settles my heart

The hard code of my heart
Has been passed along for generations
back to the dawn of time

Now at this time of life, whenever it is
Let’s hope the engine keeps running

I only stop learning to rest my eyes
Things long gone are encoded and not forgotten
Whatever is coming towards me
Is all a part of nature’s play

A paraphrasing of section 1 of Walt Whitman’s Song For Myself
2nd May 2024 – Submitted to dVerse

Today I’m feeling:

Like I had a long day with three two-hour classes. I enjoy the days filled with work just as much as the days with little to do. I don’t really have a chance to think about how I’m feeling until I get home, have a cold shower and rest my aching legs. By that time I’m happy with the work being completed.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Tongjai for offering to write some instructions for my classes in Thai to help sort out the login problems I was having with Quizizz. She said she would do it at around midday. However during my classes that morning I figured out how to fix the problem myself and finally understood how it worked. When I saw her in the afternoon I told her I had sorted it out and she was happy because she had gotten called away to do something else too. I’ve learned to trust in things working out in time but this one was getting me worried as all my lessons are arranged around using the website. As I’ve been looking deeper into the website reporting I am also seeing more and more great options for the classroom. So I am grateful to Quizizz too.

The best thing about today was:

As mentioned above, figuring out fixing that problem felt pretty good. Along with that was some welcome rain and a continued good feeling amongst the students at school.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Finding out my student lists are all messed up was a bit annoying but then I remembered that this happens every year. One upside of this was figuring out who students were by their student ID numbers stitched onto their uniforms in Thai script. I need to learn how their numbers are written.

Something I learned today?

Looking at what I’ve written already I can see that I’ve learned many things today that are at least of some use in my day-to-day life. Maybe not substantial life-changing knowledge but useful at least.

What changes am I experiencing in my life right now?

Some physical changes due to aging such as getting tired more easily and not being able to get all my pee put easily. Will the upside of that be that I won’t suffer incontinence though maybe kidney stones instead? 
As to mental changes, I believe I am still learning and getting smarter each day. I think I’m happier as I age too, the irony of which is not lost on me.
As to life in general I don’t feel like there are any significant changes really. Nothing beyond what I can expect. There will be a change soon enough when Amy gets back in October which will have to be dealt with but I feel confident we will work things out for the best.

I took this picture from the top floor of our school building because I have to remind myself how nice it is here. I am comfortable and relaxed with my work stresses. Things are going well.

Isolation – 22nd May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 18 Comments

Trapped within these walls
There are no words to share
Bare functions, dirty nails
Life lived less there

Rats outside running scared
The snakes all need to eat
From sundown to rise again
A dead circle again complete

The echo chamber of the heart
Energy gone to waste
Dreams quietly smashed apart
With only bitterness to taste 

The many paths that led here
Beyond the now closed door
Content in isolation
Left alone forever more

16th Aug 2024 – Submitted to Poets and Storytellers United

Today I’m feeling:

Positive and happy. Mondays are a breeze for me so I enjoyed the whole morning drinking coffee after greeting all the students at assembly. When I went back to school I made some photocopies for David to help him out a little. He is still confused about how things work here and doesn’t really try to help himself in that regard. I chatted with him for a fair while too. He was trying to guess my star sign as he is really into astrology but he guessed wrong and I wouldn’t tell him after that.
I had my first class with new students and took it very easy with them. They were cautious but seemed happy enough. The class didn’t feel too big even though there are 29 students. I felt good and came home as that was me done for the day.

Today I’m grateful for:

The gummy sticky oily rubber tape that Amy’s dad bought to hopefully stop the guttering from leaking in the garage next time it rains. I sanded the metal down and cut the tape to size. The tape smells like it’s full of cancer which, I don’t know, maybe gives it a balance in that something made of carcinogenic material is likely the only thing to stop the bad thing from happening. I’m reasonably hopeful it will work in the short term but all the different types of relentless weather tests even things made of stone. I also need to get on the roof and check the gutter is clear too. Dirt gets trapped up there easily and plants and weeds here don’t need much of anything to start growing.

The best thing about today was:

Almost all my students coming to me saying that they miss me and they want me to be their teacher again. I know they’ll soon get over it but it definitely made me feel good.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Oddly, despite this being the first day back in class I can’t really find anything that felt out of my control. Talking with David he started saying he doesn’t know how I do it, in reference to just getting on with my job and not letting the people around me bother me. It took me a while to figure it out and find the balance I need to be stable. David overthinks things sometimes and sure people are out to get him in some way whereas I’ve come to the conclusion that other people are thinking about you very little, if at all. And even if they are gossiping it’s none of my business. I’m doing what I’m doing and if that’s not good enough then I’m sure someone will let me know.

Something I learned today?

Well, I guessed I learned a little about one of my classes of new students. I see them again first thing in the morning and will do little interviews with them to get a better idea of where they are at.  I will be learning quite a lot this week – more than the students!

How can I make today amazing?

I don’t do amazing. Why is amazing something to strive for? My mundane days are full of amazing things. Every interaction with every atom around me is amazing for what it is. Of course, I’m not always thinking about each of those interactions but when I do I find myself in awe.
Today was filled with love, joy and happiness.

I took this picture because this cactus that got smashed a couple of weeks ago is starting to sprout new wings already.

My first day of teaching and I only have one hour to teach, annoyingly at 1.30 so I have to wait around all morning. This is ok though. I can get a bunch of things done and ensure that I have things prepared for the rest of the week.
Recently I haven’t been taking Tramadol very often and I’m surprised at the lack of side effects not taking it this time; usually, I get really dizzy. But I think I’ll pop some again once I get back into the working habit.
I’m feeling pretty okay again. I’m glad to be out of home, as much as I love it there.
One of my students, Eing Eing, was a little reticent about studying with David this semester and kept telling me she wanted me to teach her and that she loves me. Quite a few students are disappointed that I’m not teaching them.
It’s a nice feeling to have their appreciation. But this is life and we don’t get everything we want.
Soon enough they will be telling David that they love him too.

Moving Forward – 17th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Now living in a generation of hope
This is a world in which to move up
One where all the collected spoils
Can be shared from the same cup

The test of the promises made
Will be seen when faced with the burden
Where the whisper will turn to cries
Yet claimed that none ever heard them

Today I’m feeling:

Reasonably upbeat and positive after doing half an ab workout this morning and then coming home early to enjoy the rest of the day. Tigger spent about three hours sleeping next to me on the sofa where Cap usually sleeps. 

Today I’m grateful for:

My old students Porpieng and Baitong telling me about their new school, Tessaban 6. I was pleased to know that they are not allowed phones during the day and also have to do homework. I think they will both benefit from a bit of a tougher atmosphere in school though they are not particularly thrilled about the change right now.  I have high hopes for these two students as they stood out to me in my classes.

The best thing about today was:

Feeling inspired enough to check out some more Thai learning apps and sitting and doing some study and revision. I’ll get back into the habit again so I can try and communicate more.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

This morning I got up as usual and did everything as normal. As I was driving to school I noticed that another school I drive past was closed today. That was weird. Then I noticed that traffic was much better today too. And as I got closer to my school it became obvious that it was a holiday today but no one had told me. There was also nothing in my online calendar about any public holiday either. Well I just tuned right around and drove back straight to Utopia and enjoyed a couple of coffees there. Never mind the wasted petrol, here we are already with a day off after only two days back at school. Take what you can get.

Something I learned today?

I guess I learned (a little too late) that today is the Royal Ploughing Ceremony holiday and that the schools shut because of this.

What impact do I hope to make in the world?

Bereft of youthful idealism I hope that I can encourage some of my students to push themselves to make better futures for themselves. Perhaps this is elderly idealism. At least I still cling to an ideal.

I took this picture because Tig enjoys my book in a different way than me! He came for cuddles and rubs and ended up staying.

Fair-weather Fan – 15th May 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Cheering on the cheerleaders
We’re practising our cheer
It’s our team’s turn to rule
We are the leaders clear

Inspiring on to further heights
We’re living our best days
Until complacency at the top
Sees a change of ways

No longer on your side
You’re slipping down the ladder
Only winners get our support
There’s no time for being sadder

Who was that team we knew?
They’ve disappeared somehow
Forgotten heroes of the past
Are left to linger now

Today I’m feeling:

I’m happy and looking forward to teaching again. Meeting my students was fun and brought me happiness but I still feel I’m missing something deep down.

Today I’m grateful for:

All the class homeroom teachers who will take care of my students. I know all of them so I think we can work well together to mould the students to my wishes in class. It gives me a bit more confidence at least.

The best thing about today was:

Hanging out with my students again. A lot of them are disappointed that I’m not teaching them much or at all this semester. That was nice to hear but I know they will adjust quickly. I enjoyed being around them so much that I stayed until 2 pm even though I could’ve just gone home at 9 am if I’d wanted to. I met some of my new students too. They mostly seem shy so far. I’m sure that won’t take long to change though.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I got my timetable for the semester which threw a few curveballs. Just one one-hour class on Monday which would be great but it starts at 1.30 pm so I have to go to school at 8 am and then hang around for five hours before teaching. I don’t really mind this. It gives me time to read or write or prepare… I can fill the time, no problem.

Something I learned today?

There are rumours that US NGOs paid voters for pro-democracy candidates in this weekend’s election in an effort to influence Thailand away from China and towards the US.  Whilst I think this is probably likely I would still hope that a new, younger government will be able to improve the situation for the majority of people in Thailand. There still seems to be a feeling of hope for the future. No doubt there will still be some form of finagling for the military-backed establishment to make sure they maintain power so it could all go to shit in a second so we’ll just have to wait and see. Thai people in general seem quite positive and accepting of their lot. Of course, they all wish it was better. It would be nice to get a sense of optimism for the future here though.

What is a book, movie, or song that has deeply affected me?

Too many to mention but off the top of my head Dostoevsky’s The Dream of a Ridiculous Man and Notes From Underground, Tolstoy’s Anna Karenina for books. Movies – movies seem to have a less deep impact though I enjoy many. There is one in particular though that I wish I could forget. That is certainly one that affected me and not in a good way. As for music, I think that is all about nostalgia. There are many songs that give me goosebumps.

I took this picture because Tigger was looking cute and relaxed on the chair under the table but he sat up before I could get the picture I wanted. I got this instead. What a life for a fat cat! Cap and Tig have been through so much and seem as happy as they’ve ever been.