Tag: teaching

To The Wolves – 9th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The wolves are gathering
Circling their prey
Armed with razor claws
Wet teeth on display
Surrounded by enemies
Fallen down ill
Fears turned to acceptance
Of the coming kill
Hot breath drinks blood
Flesh torn and ripped
Life flows away
Once so tightly gripped
Now the hunger sated
Left in the soft snow
The body reconciles
The way we all go

The future of the human race will likely depend on our ability to transcend this tribalism and to see our fate as interconnected with everyone else’s.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Happy and relaxed
Today I’m grateful for:
The confusion caused with communication in our school as there was a meeting in the afternoon that meant we didn’t have classes. It was not clear if we were supposed to attend this meeting, along with all the students and there was enough confusing information that it meant I could sneak away, come home and have a nice afternoon nap! I can see my attitude to miscommunication is positive when the outcome works in my favour like this and luckily in this part of the school everything generally works out like this. This was not the case in our other schools.
The best thing about today was:
Listening to the Pitchblende album at high volume after Amy went out for the night and I ate a weed gummy. I always liked Pitchblende and their music is not easy to latch on to. Last night took it to the next level. If I hadn’t been getting sleepy I would’ve listened to the whole album again. As it was I hopped into bed and fell asleep listening to the jazzcore podcast which was also terrific.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
As I was driving dad’s van back from our Mae Chan dinner, all the u-turns were closed off by police, which happens when a member of the royal family comes to visit Doi Tung and they want the motorcade to be able to smoothly pass on through. This meant we couldn’t make our exit for the last 200 metres home and we were instructed to pull over to the left and turn our lights off and wait for it to pass. Amy was a little frustrated and said “fucking stupid” and her dad was annoyed at where I pulled over and wanted to move 5 metres forward but everyone told him it doesn’t matter though by this time he’d jumped out of the car indicating he was going to drive now. He got back in the passenger seat and I was just bemused by everything. Amy’s dad has some weird reactions sometimes and I don’t get it at all. I can’t see any connection between the way Thai kids react and the way he does. It’s like an alien mindset to me that I just can’t understand. It seems to be cultural but most reactions I can see some sense in but sometimes his are just bizarre. I’m curious about how his thinking works! Anyway, I agree with Amy that it’s fucking stupid to inconvenience so many people like this (hundreds and hundreds of police have to stand around for up to six hours preparing for this)but there doesn’t need to be a reaction to it. In the end, we only had to wait a few minutes and I calmly sat and waited until we could go again and we were home without too much delay.
Something I learned today?
I’m writing this on Saturday morning and recalling events of yesterday and I know there are many small things I learned in passing, by reading, talking and interacting but nothing is stepping forward to announce itself right now. It’s one of those days of learning whilst not knowing you’re learning. Accumulating knowledge, stored in the brain bank and used subconsciously. Today I will try to be more conscious.
In what ways are you good at your job?
I’m good at my job in that I can make the students feel like they are having fun whilst learning a little. I come up with ideas for classes and I try to gauge my student’s feelings and abilities and help them when I can. I’m flexible, patient and understanding. Really these are not specific skills for my job of being a teacher but more for life. Life is my real job. Am I good at that? I’m still a student in that regard and hope to always be.

I took this picture because Cap was super chilled and sunk into the sofa, lost in his fur. No new pictures today so this is a default fallback cat pic!

Crooked Smile – 8th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Is he laughing at or with?
The thief of dreams
Time was never his to give
Stolen in extremes
The folly of wasted youth
The crooked smile beams
Dirty with the truth
Liew, scrubs and cleans

The media never met a potential apocalypse it didn’t like.

from Superfreakonomics

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
The National Geographic English textbooks the school somehow obtained and I’ve been able to use in one of my classes and figured a way to push 4 of the better students by giving them higher graded books. I hope it pushes them a little.
The best thing about today was:
Playing, teaching and having fun in class, trying to motivate them and helping them find the correct answers to questions and seeing their faces light up when they get it. They may forget it by tomorrow but in those brief moments, I feel like I may be a legitimate teacher!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
A few of my smart students in one class were very distracted by having their phones and I’ve noticed them slacking off a bit lately, just copying work and not really attempting to learn. Instead of getting angry or upset I talked to them after the class and let them know that I was aware of their changed behaviour and was a little disappointed by it. They looked a little sheepish as expected and I’ll have to wait and see if it has any impact. I’m pleased with myself that I kept calm this time.
Something I learned today?
From listening to the Oh Brother podcast I learned that the curmudgeonly Mark E Smith always returned his empty pint glasses to the bar. It reminds me that I usually clean up after myself in the cafes I go to when I’m finished and I wonder if I’m also a curmudgeon and this is my small act to show others that I may be a good human after all.
Are you going to do something exciting?
One would hope so…. But…. I’m not very exciting these days. Chiang Rai is not particularly exciting and it’s all suiting me just fine. I kinda miss being excited but with highs come lows and I prefer to avoid the lows. If Amy starts a business here then that will be kinda exciting. Is it stress that gives me excitement? Organising a SEA tour would be exciting but it’s the stress, the heightened awareness, the lack of sleep etc combined that holds me in awe. So, it seems the answer may be no, or, kinda….

I took this picture because this little innocuous waterfall sits outside the school cafe and I walk by it every day, noticing it but never really looking at it so today I stopped for a second to enjoy it.

Blues Understanding – 7th December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Confront suffering
By making peace with the world
Whilst fighting against it
Embrace it wholeheartedly

Structure, inseparable
Death and suffering
Within lies freedom
The contradictory idea

Accept injustice as real
And never stop fighting against it
Every path is correct
With the blues understanding

1st Jun 2024 – Submitted to Weekly Prompts Colour Challenge

Your complicated parts are your best parts. They are what make you interesting and special.

Tarzan Kay

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Google Drive and being able to store my files for lessons there and then to adapt them to suit my schedule and plans. Having this in place has made life more flexible for me and waste less of my precious time.
The best thing about today was:
Being back in the classroom, into the thick of it, enjoying what little control I have over my students. I’m sometimes surprised they ever listen to me at all. A good start to a three-day week for me.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I discovered about ten of my students did nothing for my class yesterday and when I discovered that they had the ability to do it but just that they didn’t even bother I was a little frustrated. In the end, I pushed, prodded and encouraged them and tried to show them that with a little effort, they could achieve more. I didn’t let frustration overwhelm me.
Something I learned today?
I learned that Nay at House is 30 years old though she could still get away for 19. With her poor English and my poor Thai, we used Gui as a translator and expressed our opposing opinions on fair and tan skin and our reasons for them. No deep insights from this exchange or anything standing out especially today though I’m trying to force myself to recall things that I have read in previous 24-hour periods and finding it a struggle. I was desperately trying to remember the Chekhov story I read last night which inspired me at the time and eluded me today. Coincidentally, it loosely ties in with today’s prompt about earliest memories as the story, Grisha, was about seeing the world through the eyes of a toddler.
Write about your earliest memory.
I’m not sure about my age with some of my memories but they revolve around being maybe from 4 to 8 years old in Whitehaven and I have a few different memories from then and can’t pinpoint which would be the earliest. I also know that I lived in a small hamlet called Blencogo before Whitehaven and I have a vague recollection of the house and garden there but can’t be certain I’m getting them mixed up with other memories, including one when visiting around that area in my mid-20s. I will write more about my early memories at some point.

I took this picture because this is student Amy being smart and thinking that no one will be upset by giving the wrong finger. I threatened to show her mum but she said she was not scared of her mum, so I said I’ll show her dad who I have met before and she was a bit more concerned about that! It was all in good fun though and Amy has grown up a little in the last few months and is very capable of doing my work.

The Tech Ghosts – 25th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The victim of these spectral slaves
Invited into our rooms
Ghosts of make-believe realities
On which this monster consumes
Mere cogs of a mega machine
Assimilated to technological production
With immediate planned obsolescence
And the means of its own destruction

We must be willing to get rid of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.

Joseph Campbell

Today I’m feeling:
Pretty good, a little relaxed
Today I’m grateful for:
Kru Fluke coming to assist me in recording my voiceover for the flower festival this year. She helped me with pronunciation of the Thai words and translating with the audio guy. She didn’t really need to come and help but I appreciate that she did.
The best thing about today was:
Being around the students for the open day. We were all happy that we weren’t in classes. I was super happy that some of them were even doing the work I asked them to do!
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I guess this is connected with the comment above. I asked my students to do some work for me as we didn’t have classes. I realised pretty quickly that many of them wouldn’t bother doing the work and most of them weren’t around to be able to follow up with. There was no way I could control this situation and whilst I feel a little disrespected by the students who won’t do the work out of laziness or sheer bloody-mindedness I have to let it go. So I’m thinking now about how I can reward those students who did do the work.
Name 10 people you love.
Amy
Hayden
Jochen
Kieran
Chrissie
Sharon
Aaron B
Kimi
Steve
Mum

I took this picture because there are new monsters everywhere.

What’s Not Mine – 24th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

My favourite mug smashed to pieces
Now strewn across the kitchen floor
Happened a thousand times in my mind
And so this is what I’ve prepared for

Whenever you must learn a new skill or alter your career path later in life, you reconnect with that youthful, adventurous part of yourself.

Robert Greene

Today I’m feeling:
Mostly happy, a little tired.
Today I’m grateful for:
The Bath and Body Works car freshener that lost its smell in the car but I brought it inside and shoved it in the screen door and pierced it slightly so the fluid can slowly drip. In the afternoon the sun hits it and the bedroom smells great.
The best thing about today was:
Not having to teach. Can’t complain about days like that.
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
I was expecting to have to teach today but at the last minute realised that I wouldn’t be able to. I hastily prepared some work for my students to do in their own time and was able to feel that I wasn’t neglecting my students or just skipping out. I doubt if most will do my work so at least I can see who is conscientious at least.
Describe your family’s greatest catastrophe to date.
I suppose this would be my father dying which undoubtedly affected things around me but as I was less than two years old I can’t say that it affected me directly at the time. It’s also not possible to say how it has affected me since as I have nothing to compare it with. I don’t think there has been anything catastrophic in my life since though no doubt some things may have felt so at the time.

I took this picture because Kim didn’t really seem to mind balancing across these parts of the sofa.

Til The End – 23rd November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Make sure to watch til the end
This video needs the stats
Nothing happens at that point
As you can see within the chats

But make sure to watch til the end
Cos this video needs to go viral
A dollar for every ad served
Within this ever-downward spiral

Make sure to watch til the end
If you really want to laugh
Forget about the time you’ve wasted
Cutting your life in half

Make sure to watch til the end
Scroll and pause, pause and scroll
You’re the product in this game
And the devil wants your soul

So make sure you watch til the end…

The foundations of a free country is that your freedom to swing your fist ends where someone else’s nose begins.

Ryan Holiday

Today I’m feeling:
Reasonably happy.
Today I’m grateful for:
The old auntie at the market that made an old-style Thai dessert that is hard to come across. It’s a little like Japanese mochi, made with sticky rice and flour and other things I don’t recognise.
The best thing about today was:
Explaining some work to a couple of students and seeing the joy of understanding on their faces when it clicked for them. Small steps. Interested students are a teacher’s pleasure. Uninterested students are impossible to get through to and those moments of understanding are far fewer with them. So even a poorer student that shows interest is preferred.
Daily thought
Who is someone living that you admire?
I’ve been thinking about this off and on all day and as was commented on where I found this question, it is much easier to come up with a person that is dead. Why is that? A finished story perhaps. A life that no longer can be spoiled… I admire many of my musician friends, just for their abilities to create music that sparks me. This can apply to artists I don’t know too but the connection feels vaguer these days. This admiration is not necessarily for who these people are but for things they created, though there is a strong connection in the qualities of patience and persistence amongst other things. If I have admiration for who a person is then that would be Amy. She has her ups and downs as much as anyone but in general, is a happy person whose positivity is seen by most and I’m sure has helped guide her through life with good results. I admire her attitude. I’m not like that, not like her in that way. I wish I could be but I just can’t. It’s one of the reasons I want to be with her though. She’s a counterbalance for me.
What’s your best advice for teenagers?
The best advice is what I have learned through reading about Stoicism and understanding the dichotomy of control. As I am teaching teenagers at the moment this often comes up for them in learning about dealing with relationships and situations. It is always something I have to remind myself about every day though. I think I’ll make that a daily question for myself from tomorrow.

I took this picture because this is typical of my students in class. Today I laughed with them but actually, I feel disappointed for them. The environment is just not conducive to learning.

Twatter – 7th November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Smash them in the shitter
Fry their dicks in batter
Friends of Gary Glitter
Fuck ’em, they don’t matter
Freedom, guns and fuck yous
The new intellectual debate
Pretending to be news
In the amphitheatres of late

You must always respect those who struggle, even if they are defeated.

from Burmese Moons by Sophie Ansel

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Trying to engage some of the ‘bad’ girls in my class and able to draw them into enjoying finding solutions or seeing how to think about something in a different way.
The best thing about today was:
Catching up on some things during the three-and-a-half-hour break between classes. Each day of the week has a different schedule that I can utilise in different ways. Mondays will be catch-up days.
Daily thought
Do you rule over yourself?
I try. But there are some things that I don’t wish to give up that just to feel that I do rule over myself. For instance, I take a mix of sertraline, tramadol and kratom which keeps me very well-balanced and in a good state of mind. I understand that it would be preferable to be able to maintain that balance without these things but I’m happy to let them rule over me for now.
What are three things you couldn’t live without?
How to answer this? Air, food, water? Or, really there’s nothing that I couldn’t live without? I enjoy the things I have in my life but if I didn’t have them I could still live. So, I guess I could think of the question like this – what are three things you prefer not to live without. Maybe that’s easy too. Amy, books, music. If I could have four then I would add cats.

I took this picture because on our bike ride on Saturday Bruno and I ended up in Doi Hua Mae Kham and rode around this developing village with freshly laid concrete. The format of the panorama doesn’t show quite how steep the road is or how spectacular the views were (unless you zoom in a little).

Makes Me Laugh – 2nd November 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

It’s difficult to see your point
When you are the one affected
Cos I’m just going to carry on
I choose not to be infected

Your cold hard exterior
Makes me laugh so much
Your two faces finding
There’s things you cannot touch

Hello and good morning to you
I care not your reply
Every day the same
It’s not my business to wonder why

Most people are stupid and lazy and really only concerned with getting through the next couple of hours with silliness and stimulation and something to eat. Be polite.

Katherine Hepburn

Today I’m feeling:
Happy. A little breathless.
Today I’m grateful for:
The printer at work where I finally was able to finish scanning one of the books I use for one of my classes. I was also happily watching the kids outside doing fun and funny activities with older students. It made me realise the different ways kids learn some responsibilities here.
The best thing about today was:
Reading a stack of different comics this evening. I know I do this most evenings but the stories were all particularly enjoyable tonight.
What is your favourite photo of yourself?
Probably the one from Dean’s party the week after Torpedo Town in 1986. I’m standing tall, topless and skinny, pointing at the camera with a cigarette. It was the second time I’d ever taken acid and at this party Emma and I did it together (her first time) and we had a great evening, night and morning. The original photo got sent to an American gay punk fanzine, which I got sent but without the original picture returned. So now I only have this photocopied copy of the picture.

I took this picture because this sequence all happened pretty much in about 60 seconds. Cap was happily by my pillow. Kim came in and sat on the bedhead which I was surprised about as she usually goes straight for play and hence me taking the picture. As I was sending the picture to Amy, Kim had gone into attack mode and I took the second picture. Cap quickly jumped over to the other bed and Kim seemed satisfied with that and nonchalantly returned to her slumber on the bedhead.

Pie Time – 26th October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Savour the crumbs of the pie
Scraps picked from the floor
Be sure to breed and multiply
The cogs must turn some more
Money is power is oil is gold
Not for some to touch
And so the story has been told
From parent to child as such
Oil is power is money is gold
Only for some to touch
And so the lie has been sold
There’s already too much
So savour those crumbs of pie
Get back to the factory floor
Sons step in as fathers die
And so remains the score

Leaving this will be easier than living it.

Charles Bukowski

Today I’m feeling:
am: happy and relaxed – pm: tired and subdued
Today I’m grateful for:
My hair bleach to make me feel younger, at least when I look in the mirror. I’m still mixing up old congealed powder that I bought years ago and too thrifty to throw out. It’s not perfect but it still does the job.
The best thing about today was:
Crossing a few little bits and pieces off the to-do list. I have a few more that I have to remember for tomorrow too including picking up a cake for my birthday that Amy has arranged for me. Thank you my lovely little Amy.
What jobs do you do in life that you don’t get paid for?
Thinking in reverse, I do one job of teaching that I do get paid for and I don’t get paid for anything else so it comes down to what might be considered a job. I have a hobby promoting musicians and their music that does have minimal income but I don’t consider it as getting paid and loses more money than it gains. I don’t have any philanthropic jobs. I do work at things but none of them are jobs.

I took this picture because Kim Chi is enjoying sitting on the toilet mat and doesn’t move out of the way when I want to go. This is what I look down at!

Lazy Princess – 20th October 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Princess Amy, she’s so lazy
She will never become the queen
Made her teacher really crazy
Because she lives inside a dream

Princess Amy still never learns
But all her friends are growing
They are all taking their turns
Off to bright futures going

Will the princess ever see
The wisdom of work instead?
Will the princess ever be
Able to get out of her bed?

a poem for one of my students

The laws that govern circumstances are abolished by new circumstances.

Napoleon

Today I’m feeling:
Happy
Today I’m grateful for:
Amy’s parents bringing me food again. I was out at the time, at Daytripper, doing more lesson preparation and dropped by the market to pick up some dinner. A stall was selling pla duk foo which I hadn’t seen there before so I grabbed that and some bananas. When I got home I saw that Amy’s parents had left some food and when I checked the bag it was pla duk foo and bananas! I’ve got a lot of eating to do!
The best thing about today was:
Reading some random text from a teaching English book and being able to add an idea to make my lessons more interesting for my students next semester. Doesn’t sound too exciting I know but I was inspired enough to update all my lessons immediately.
Another thing was coming across a KLS video from 2016 that was fantastic to see and got my little brain running again about organising a tour for them here. I think it would go really well. I need to start looking into this more.
If you started a sports team, what would the colours and mascot be?
I suppose I might pick blue after my childhood soccer passion for Ipswich Town and Italy. The red and white of Sydney Swans would perhaps remind too much of Arsenal. As for a mascot, I don’t know. I must admit I would not be a good person to make these decisions as I consider them to be irrelevant though I understand their purpose, it’s just not something I’m interested in.

I took this picture because I was surprised to find Kim here on Amy’s pillow. I also find it cute to see cats sleep in this position. In fact it makes me envious. Unfortunately, rockets from the funeral next door sent her off hiding behind the bed again soon after I took this.