Stupid Delusion – 1st January 2024

No longer intoxicated
Awoken from my dreams
Meaning was a delusion
A stupid delusion it seems


Yeah, happy new year!


Today I’m feeling:

Happily lazy again.  I ate lots and did little over these last 4 days and it’s been a good wind down to the end of the year.  Tomorrow it’s back to exercise, work and reality. I plan to just do abs and legs this week to try and get the ache out of my shoulders before working on any upper body exercises again.  I’m stiff from sitting and laying down so much recently too!

Today I’m grateful for:

The internet, YouTube, the BBC, John Peel and Thinking Fellers Union Local 282 whose John Peel Session I have just found and listening to as I’m writing this.  Excellent!

The best thing about today was:

Finishing the excellent John Cooper Clarke biography.  It feels good to finish reading a book on the first day of the year.

Also releasing the SpeechOdd/HighxVoltage album for pre-order through Bandcamp today which got a few folks interested.  It feels good to have a record release on the first day of the year.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

There wasn’t much to be done today, lots I could’ve done but decided not to, so there was little to get out of control.

Perhaps I could say that though I was happy to play a little guitar this afternoon I was also really bad at it. Just missing a few days sets me back. And then after watching some Thinking Fellars live footage I marvel at the genius of their guitar interplay and wonder if I could ever become as skilled as they are. It’s half inspiring, half frustrating. What a great band. I fucking hate popular music – what a waste of skill!

Something I learned today?

I came across an interview with a YouTuber I follow called Nathan Rich titled Scientology, Punk Rock and Addiction.  Wild!  I know him for his investigative journalism opposing the Western anti-China narratives.  Life is long and varied and I’m looking forward to watching this and learning more about his past.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I made Amy’s bed for her without being asked.

I cleared as many hairy worms as I could find around the hose and drowned them all in a bucket.  All this was in an effort to stop Amy’s allergy to them which makes her itchy and brings her out in a rash.  Somehow I’m not affected by them.

A close member of your family has committed murder. Would you keep quiet about it? What might your silence depend upon?

No way.  The circumstances of the event may have an effect on my attitude towards them but covering it up would be out of the question.

Write a message to myself to be reviewed one year from today.

Why? Everything I write here is up for review at any point in time. Review that.

Art took this picture a few weeks ago on his trip up to Mae Hong Son. I saw it on his Facebook page and it jumped out at me with its magnificent misty morning glow. No new pictures today.

Mine – 13th June 2022

This here is my property
But it’s only a word to say
It’s just a thing to hold on to
And let go of again one day

Built on years of hard work
Though hardly blood, sweat and tears
Each inch contains a memory
That remains ’til the end of years

That twinkle is all I can hold
And will always take me to that time
That feeling cannot be taken away
And will forever then be mine


The turbulence was purposeless, but in huge quantities of purposeless turbulence, purpose took shape.

Liu Cixin from The Dark Forest

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to Thinking Fellers Union Local 282 for making music that makes me smile and tap my toes in the morning.


The Week That Was – 26th August 1979

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #70 – Dead End – 27th December 2020

Shut Down! Dead! Run out of town!  Sheltering over the border, we bring this one last episode before fleeing the despots.  One day we’ll be back!  Look out for DJ Donut Trump – he’ll bring you the future of rock ‘n’ roll.

This week there’s all sorts of music – weird, noisy, experimental, fucked up strangeness, straight-up punk and pop all delivered with no compromise.  Join our other 3 listeners to check out the end!

Incidentals taken from the Church of the Sub Genius Hour of Slack.

Listen right here or Mixcloud, Stitcher, Apple, Amazon…..all those cool places I guess.

https://www.facebook.com/The-Chiang-Rai-Alternative-Hour-107307097314670/

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for all the students I have met since I started teaching. I have learned something from all of them.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #53 – 29th August 2020

NO MORE BABIES!

This week there’s music from Built To Spill, Doo-Dooettes, Tangled Hair, Records, Man Man, Institute, Bob Drake, The Playn Jayn, Sea Monkey See, Godzilla Black, Human Cabbages, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282, Billy Childish and the Black Hands, Seam, Funkadelic, The Who and The Wipers.

Intro and background music by Utotem.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for this beautiful sunny Saturday morning filling me with happiness.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #39 – 23rd May 2020

Music from Pregnant Neck, The Fugs, 35mm Dreams, Tsushimamire, Skurge, Mudhoney, George Duke, Electric Light Orchestra, Lightning Bolt, Unknown, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282, Dennis Brown, Wild Youth, Vibrato Fetish, Spanish Dogs, beNt, Cockney Rejects and The Temptations.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my shower in the morning, to cool and refresh, and prepare for the day.

To-do list

  • Continue video editing ✅
  • Enjoy Baew’s birthday party ✅
  • Record TCRAH if time
  • Find warm up video and then exercise
  • Read some more – I want to finish this book! ✅

I enjoyed learning the video editing software today. Amy was obviously in her monthly bad mood so it was good to be out of the way. She was baking cakes too. I find it hard to deal with her when she’s in these moods and even she knows that she is not herself.

She was happy when we got to Baew’s though and we started eating and drinking. I had to stop after a little bit though because I was tired and I ended up sleeping for a couple of hours!

Tomorrow – get up and go again.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #17 – 21st December 2019

Music from Captain Beefheart, MIA, Danielson, Screaming Maldini, The Crowd, Lovely Little Girls, Bruno Nicholai, GISM, Sajjanu, Mason, Don Cabellero, Caroliner, Thingy, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282, Family Fodder, Teenage PHDs, The Girls, Soul Junk, Naked Raygun, Discharge.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to have developed my friendly personality. I never used to be like this but have practiced hard and now have the self-confidence to talk to people openly.

To-do list

  • Talk to a stranger.
  • Compliment as many people as you can (sincerely).
  • Record new TCRAH.
  • Upload latest TCRAH.
  • Read 3 chapters.
  • Study some more Thai.
  • Sort some more CDs.

Did it list

  • Managed to do everything on my to do list today.
  • Talked with a stranger.
  • Complimented as many people as I could – Fern, Khawthang, Phuli, Sea, Prang, Amy.
  • Recorded new TCRAH.
  • Uploaded and shared latest TCRAH.
  • Read 4 chapters of Anna Karenina.
  • Studied a little more Thai.
  • Sorted CDs and music files.
  • Helped Amy prepare for tomorrow.
  • Got up before 8am.
  • Started looking at old writing etc.

I didn’t think I’d completed my to do list today but realised I did talk to a stranger, JaJa. She was sitting with her cat outside the copy shop. 
I complimented a few people today but realise I could compliment even more. It was good that it was in my mind though. 
Recording TCRAH felt a little rushed today because we are quite busy with other things – this meant that I didn’t get to experiment as much as I would’ve liked. 
Studying Thai at my own pace seems to suit me a little – if I can form that habit continually it will make me feel good.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #05 – 28th September 2019

Music from All Right The Captain, Plastic Blues Band, Phleg Camp, Replacements, Tanjaret Daghet, Sweetheart, Mike Watt, Flin Flon, Drive Like Jehu/BlackPink, Keukhot, Birdsongs of the Mesozoic, Ruins, Free Salamander Exhibit, The Halo Benders, The Red Krayola, Eat Avery’s Bones, Idiot Flesh, Thinking Fellers Union Local 282.

Gratitude Journal

Thank you to me for always growing and learning. I know it has been hard but it got my where I am today.

I’m grateful for our friend Baew who always shows us kindness and caring. I’m thankful she is in our lives.