Tag: tinnitus

Kintsugi – 12th April 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 23 Comments

Her perfect features cracked
At time’s many trials
Cool, calm and collected
Thoughts camouflaged with smiles

Bluffing her admirers
A morning mirror does not lie
Putting on a face
Of a beauty, none could deny

Refreshed and worthwhile
No longer a broken cup
She strode into the day
Happily made up

Shared to NaPoMo
25th Jun 2025 – shared with dVerse Poetics: Building from the Broken

Today I’m feeling:

It’s still early but I think I feel a little more motivated than yesterday.  I’m lesson planning already and that’s going well, so it’s a good start.  

I think I need to be busy, doing stuff, to keep myself occupied.  If I get lazy and don’t move my brain and body I start to atrophy.

Today I’m grateful for:

The poetry folks who post prompts and ideas that inspire me to write.  I don’t know how many other people might think that I write quite well but I write for myself and when I look back at things that I’ve written I often feel proud and impressed.

I started a free poetry course at one site and struggled with the first assignment which was to write about yourself.  It should be easy, most of my poetry is about myself but when asked specifically to do it, where do you start?

Oddly enough, I ended up writing a poem today that was written for four different prompts but ended up being about myself almost directly and I will use it as a part of what I submit.

The best thing about today was:

Getting enough lesson plans done to feel comfortable that I know what I’m doing.  I can see the way forward to having enough done for the semester and working out what is needed for the rest of the year too.

Let’s hope that the students reach my expectations of what I have planned for them; otherwise I will have to do some quick revisions.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’ve been happy to get a lot done today but have also felt a little annoyed at times, though not acted on, just in my head, by little things.  It was when I was watching TV, though, that I really noticed bad tinnitus in my left ear and it’s still bothering me now.

I’m not sure exactly what has brought this on.  I did play guitar for about 20 minutes but it wasn’t at a volume as excessive as I sometimes play.  Usually, the ear ringing comes and goes but it seems to be hanging around today.

Something I learned today?

Utopia will only open in the morning this weekend as they will all go and celebrate Songkran in the city in the afternoons.

A couple of days ago, I learned that Nick at Daytripper will leave for Australia, where he’s hoping to work as a barista in Sydney.  With him going, Art decided to close the shop completely as he is too busy to keep it going.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

As I mentioned above I did get internally annoyed many times today.  However, biting my teeth through all that I did everything that Amy asked of me, particularly when she ran in from the garden with her skin boiling up in an allergic reaction to something.  I got her ice, rubbed on lotions and creams, and did this and that.  

She’s disappointed that she is allergic to something (probably the hairy worms), as when the temperature is good, she enjoys pottering about out there.

I took this picture because Fat Tig was taking a break, as was I.

No Sacrifices – 21st April 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

Hey boys, the war is over
Even though it wasn’t won
There will be no spoils to share
But it definitely is done

No more letters to the front
Or eating rations in the mud
All the winners are losers
With the spilling of their blood

The rules of engagement
And decisions to be made
Must be around a table
And no sacrifices paid

Today I’m feeling:

I’m ok today but not that excited. It’s nice to have reasonably breathable air again even though the smoke is filling in the gaps again after being blown around yesterday.

Today I’m grateful for:

Candles and tea lights (see below). Also, Febreeze (again) as Tigger decided to spray the sofa where Cap sits which is right next to where I sit.

The best thing about today was:

I watched a movie today and also listened to some music. I wasn’t overly impressed with either but it’s a sign of a slow return to normality. I also received an email from Sharon which I wasn’t so surprised about as I had already been thinking about my mum when I remembered it was her birthday yesterday and that was also the reason for her email. I still haven’t replied to her one from Christmas so I’ll get on that this week. Hopefully, I’ll get back to the UK to see Sharon and family again one day.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Another fairly violent storm rolled through between six and seven pm knocking out power to the whole village, maybe even further. The breeze block holding down the roof failed and I managed to get another up so had two now holding it down. It sounded like they failed too but I couldn’t tell yet as it was now totally dark. I found a few candles and there’s a nice breeze blowing through the now-open windows. It’s been four hours now and I’ve been reading on my iPad and contemplating trying to sleep. However, the rain has stopped and the temperature is likely to rise to unbearable even during the early hours. Hopefully, someone is out there trying to untangle wires.

Something I learned today?

Looks like this power outage is extensive as even my phone has no service. I write this because I usually look back at what YouTube videos I’ve watched to see if I might’ve learned anything. Now I’m going to have to test my short-term memory.

As I’m laying here thinking I realise that I am learning the sound of the night. No buzzing transformers, the hum of machines on stand-by, pumps pushing water and no doof doof from garaged PAs or the nightclub. It’s Friday night and an occasional frog and cricket is having a brief discussion. Otherwise, all I can hear now is the loud ringing in my ears.

What am I most proud of myself for accomplishing this week?

I’ve managed to keep Amy’s indoor plants alive (just about), my remaining two cats alive and myself alive. That’s an accomplishment. I just continue with what I’m doing. Things will never be completed, they will just stop when I drop dead. Accomplishments? Little things get crossed off little mental lists and when that final day comes will I have accomplished anything? ‘Here lies Shaun, finally accomplished nirvana.’

But I do carry a little pride in what I do.

I took this picture because it shows our roof trying to take off and drenching our cactuses in our entertainment area during the storm yesterday. Another is forecast today but there’s no sign of it so far.