*Operations – 6th September 1998

Email with TLJ

T: how’s your day been so far? hope it’s going well. apparently, sheera’s real name is princess adora – hah! pat wrote and told us all. anyway, sorry for keeping you up last night. still want to hear everything you did last night. real tired, only had about 5 hours sleep – how about you. anyway, how come you haven’t emailed me yet?
just doing sdd stuff. got a timesheet to do. email me babe.

S: Only just got here sweety. Remember I went to the doctors this morning. I have to have an ultrasound and may need surgery! Not sure if the Workers Comp will cover that and worried they might want all the money back. I’m real tired too. I wish you were here.
Missing you. Need coffee.
I mean REALLY missing you. Not the normal every day missing you that I day but a long heart aching miss of your breath on my cheek…..

T: i’m sorry you have so many things wrong with you (though i think you’re perfect!).
anyway, had the weirdest dream….I was supposed to meet my SDD group at 11am, and mel (from my sdd group) had sent invitations for this dinner/party at her house, that started at 1, and she didn’t want anyone turning up later than 1. anyway, in actuality, i don’t know what mel thinks of me, cause when we were doing sdd, we weren’t really on the same wavelength in understanding each other – but we were the two that knew and understood the most about it, but i left it to her to compile our documentation together – so the fact she invited me was weird – and i was really eager to see what her husband looked like – (just curious, because she talks about him sometimes).
anyway, when i got to uni whilst waiting for the sdd meeting, i went to see this performance, and they were giving out free magnums (the iceblocks – the food had to come in somewhere) and I saw eric and told him i couldn’t sell his friend my SM textbook. he said it was ok.
then i realised it was 2pm, and i had missed the sdd meeting AND mel’s party – but was still keen to go to mel’s.
also, i didn’t have anything to take to mel’s and thought she’d resent me even more if I didn’t take anything along – so i went to shop for wine, and met some other people on this grassy hill (kathleen was there for some of my dream).
anyway, that’s not the wierd part. i was phoning you from outside your office – like at csc when you ring from the phone just outside the door, but our lines crossed and i started talking to your boss jacqui and you.
anyway, she sounded like a real bitch and really sarcastic, so I decided to muck around with her a bit – being a real smartarse. and she was sarcastically asking for paper for the printer or something, and i was feeling pretty smug saying shit back to her.
then she hung up, and i got a scare because she burst out the door and grabbed hold of me and told me i was never going to work at csc ever!!!!!!!!!
i think it was a premonition. anyway, sorry to bore you with my dream, but it was so vivid, and funny that i dreamed it. i even remember what jacqui looked like and was wearing!
anyway, please explain it to me. i couldn’t write anything raunchy last email cause i was talking to the first year who thinks i am a militant lesbian, and well, i couldn’t ruin the fantasy for him!!!!!!

S: Not sure I can explain but it’s funny as fuck! Lucky you not having to ever work at CSC!! Not sure I like you being someone else’s fantasy. I think you should be just mine – actually I guess you are my reality (as you help me with my fantasies). Anyway – don’t want them thinking funny things about you. Tell them you have a mean mother of a boyfriend who’ll come beat him up. You never bore me sweety. Oh yeah – I’m still missing you.
Lots to say but too little time and also brain is on go slow due to tiredness. Mail me all day though!!

S: Ahh, yr the sweetest little thing

T: i remember after she came and yelled at me though, that i’d blown my chances and i’d never be able to work at CSC – and i was real disappointed. do you think jacqui would do that to me?

S: Anything to get things the way she wants them – watch out babe this is the real world and prepare to be crushed.

T: will keep emailing you. hearing from you is fun. missing you too babe.

S: I love the ding of new mail

T: just physio tonight?

S: Yes. and sleep at last.

T: i think our family is living on the edge and perhaps going indian tonight – cause nat’s bored with chinese.

S: Well, that’s what i was thinking last night while I was talking to Dharmini!!!! ONLY JOKING – DON’T HIT ME – well not til I’m ready.

T: we didn’t get mum anything so i feel bad, but i hope the party we throw her will cheer her up.

S: Is she unhappy – how can you tell.

T: anyway, i’ll keep looking. dad made croissants this morning, and kath got her chocolates and dried apricots or something (though mum made it pretty clear to her she didn’t want chocolates or flowers this year!) but dad
doesn’t seem to get the message – how could anyone not want chocolates and flowers i ask you? or kitchen appliances for that matter – or irons………..

S: Someone to iron too hey

T: real tired as well, though my fingers aren’t keeping up with the brain so well (what’s new) – and there’s so much i’d like to tell ya. notice the length of my mails to yours – mine’s longer – but what’s new? – ha!

S: I’m sorry but I’m happy. Thanks for your beautiful time

T: i’m full of energy babe, full of you, tlj

S: I’m full of you and I’ll be full of energy too if you come right here and sit on my lap.
Soon, sooner, soonest

T: that dharmini comment’s the funniest thing i’ve heard all week – can’t stop laughing – i look like a git. man that was such a good call…….you bastard!

S: I’ll take that as a compliment!

T: love the name. also love ari for a girl.

S: The singer in the Slits was called Ari Up.

T: anyway, if you’re that bored with chinese, try something else.

S: Well, I’m not, so there!

T: now you tell me, what’s irish and spanish cuisine like? heard an awful lot about the tapas and paellas – fiery!

S: Jeez, man you the one who watches all the cooking progs on TV. Din’t you see Iain Hewitson (or whatever his fat name is) do his tour of European cuisine. Only remember Italy actually but sure they went to Spain too. As for Irish they just eat anything and potatoes and you have to drink ten pints of Guiness at lunch time then it doesn’t matter what the food tastes like.

T: love to try them all one day, won’t stop til i’ve tasted all the nations – i’m very multicultural.

S: Watch out for Pauline. Yes – we’ll try them together – you go the meat I’ll go the veggies (cos I’m cool and yr not)

T: quick thinking – i thought you were tired, but you’re just crude.

S: Don’t understand this comment

T: i hate that in a man, and in english food – getting fucking tired of just plain old bangers and mash!

S: What the fick are talking bout sweety. PLEASE EXPLAIN!

T: better keep me satisfied babe, tlj.

S: Well, howm ah doing?

T: ps – HA!

S: PS HA2! Loving ya sexy

T: well, you vague little thing – you say you’re getting bored with Chinese, so I’m a gonna get bored with english. get it? you were talking bout girls (I was talking about food)

S: Ah, well now I understand you see cos you are always thinking bout food and I’m always thunking bout girls and in particular one little cute girl on the end of these mails, namely you , you understand.

T: so know i’m talking about both – men and food (bangers and mash and you). still don’t get it? i’ve gotta go.

S: Yr gone.

T: have fun, love tlj. ps – you’ve kept me entertained this morning. thanks babe.

S: The same!

*I had fun – 14th August 1998

Email with TLJ

S: talking to you last night. Let’s do it again.
Are you going home after uni or do you have time to meet – I can take you home or to Turramurra – whatever madame would like.
Hope you have a good day today and I look forward to seeing you soon baby, sweety, gorgeous etc

T: sorry babe, was going to go straight home after uni so i can get a lift to turra with my folks. i don’t know my uncle’s address or how to get there.
anyway, what time do the wreckers start? i don’t think i’ll be doing anything tonight, but if i am, i’ll call you.

S: Wreckers should be on at nine or thereabouts. There’s only two bands. I’ll go home first I think unless we get time to meet somewhere or anything. I’ll leave home about eight I guess. Got to bed after 2am this morning and I’m starting to get a little cranky! (So come cheer me up!) If you are in the city then definetely call – call anyway. If not I’ll probably go home at a reasonable time – I have to go the Doctors first thing and still have lots to do to tidy up the flat – it’s insane!!!
Catch me if you can sweetheart. Call before you go home if you go home OK!
PS Did I ever tell you how beautiful you are?

*(?), (Zen), Manitou, The Cat – Academy, Bournemouth, UK – 25th February 1985

The Week That Was

Record of the week: Atrox – Screaming At Deaf Ears demo, Manitou – Something Happened (live)

25th February 1985
Work was pretty boring. Mike’s back but I’m not talking to him and he’s getting the message. Pulled a muscle in my back. Got home, watched Grange Hill. Rode down to Bournemouth. Managed to find The Academy. Saw a Brighton group called The Cat – ok. Manitou – good (had a laser show). Sold two singles. Fucking foggy.
7

26th February 1985
Only slept 5 and a half hours last night. Cos I started talking to Mike he’s fucking following me again. He nearly started crying cos he fucked up an order. Had a good game of football. Not going to Salisbury tonight. Some timber course or something. Came home. Don’t remember what I did tonight. Went to sleep at 9.30.
5

27th February 1985
Woke up at 6.30. Decided not to go to college. Went back to sleep. Didn’t get up til 3.30. (Slept 18 hours!) Felt pretty dizzy and tired. Drum kits falling apart. Went down Youth Club. Felt like I was pissed. Had a go at Bennett cos he pissed around on my bike on Sunday. He said he didn’t but he finally admitted it, so I had another go and went and told his mum. Came home.
3

28th February 1985
Went to work today. Can’t remember a lot of what happened today. I can remember what happened tonight though. Me, Muz and Crabb had a laugh around Gaunts. Took the piss out of Jasper. Went back to Muz’s. Recorded some shit. It was as well.
5

1st March 1985
Went to work. Left at ten to go to Winton for Sales Training. Mr Andrews was there, I said I wasn’t going to be there in the afternoon. So Mr Andrews chucked me off the scheme cos I walked out. Told MJ. Went to Job Centre. Came home. Went to sleep. Made appointment for interview tomorrow. Spent an hour looking for everyone. They raided Dumpton. Jasper, the twat, nicked a fire extinguisher.
6

2nd March 1985
Got up late. Went down Gaunts. Everyone was pissed off with each other. Went home. Went to Wimborne. Had interview at 4. Sounds like good work – hope I get it. Came back after an hour. Scott was gonna get some videos but didn’t, so had a game of Spotlight. Took the piss out of Crabby. Came home. Film last night – Mean Streets.
7

3rd March 1985
Got up at 10. Rode down to Wareham. Got train to Dorchester. My singing was pretty bad so Paul said. Didn’t do a lot otherwise. Came back. Borrowed Young Ones book and Toy Dolls LP and demo. Came back. I think I stayed in this evening. Young Ones book is good too.
6