A Pink Code – 21st February 2023

From orange to red, we’re ready
To march off into four-cornered war
Fortunes hold battle lines steady
When it’s forgotten what we’re fighting for

And twenty years of resistance
Have been unable to remove the stink
Yet perhaps with a little more insistence
Peace may be found with CODEPINK


Today I’m feeling:

Content. Happy that I have the afternoon free from classes.

Today I’m grateful for:

Lachlan and Mike for sending me the lost package replacement of the HCT album release from last year though they unfortunately also sent me vinyl instead of the t-shirt I ordered.

The best thing about today was:

Going to Daytripper and learning a new card game with some of the students there. The game is called Keng (I think) and after getting a quick understanding of the rules I played a few hands before I had to go and could see there was a deeper strategy involved.

I’ll play again if I see those kids there again. I’ve seen them there before but today was the first time I’ve been introduced.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Struggling to think of anything, except my students as per usual but even that didn’t bother me today.

Something I learned today?

From listening to Jello Biafra’s podcast I learned a little about Ukrainian history and if I remember correctly Ukraine is where the original Russians are from, something about Vikings moving down from the north.

I also put 2 and 2 together about the connection between Russia and the ‘rus’ in Belarus though I think I might’ve acquired that knowledge many years ago and since forgotten.

Whilst listening and considering these things it makes one wonder why we’re fighting over arbitrary borders that have changed over the years. One of the interviewee’s stories was about a family member who had lived in three different countries without ever moving house!

What are some of my favourite memories from past travels?

The extreme dry heat in Rhodes, the smell of a new world, swimming at the pool, riding around the island on a motorbike, getting naked at the pebble beach, the broken bottle of ouzo in my luggage on return.

Landing in Sydney for the first time, the smell of lemon-scented gums, riding on highways wider than I’d ever seen, through so much beautiful scrubland, mountains and rivers.

Landing in Guangzhou, China, clueless; again, the smell of a new world, wandering around the Forbidden City in Beijing and a ruined part of the Great Wall in the countryside, the food! The food! So many different places around China and crazy stories. One day maybe, they’ll be written down before forgotten.

The temples in Kyoto, the flashing neon of Osaka and Tokyo, the food! Beautiful walks in Nikko and the onsen in Minikami.

The crazy car ride from the airport in Kuala Lumpur with Epit, meeting up with Lex at Batu Caves, the start of a great friendship with Kimi and staying in his many residences over the years, the food, the monkies, the waterfalls, the monitor lizards.

In Thailand, the rice paddies, the valleys, the waterfalls, the beaches, the food!

I took this picture because my routine doesn’t vary that much and I’m here again at Daytripper though this time at a different table than usual. The temperature is cool due to the haze though it doesn’t seem to be from smoke or at least not the usual lethal smoke.

A letter to future Hayden (sent 21st Feb 2022)

Dear Future Hayden,

Hey buddy, who’s got yr belly?

You can tell I’ve been watching too much Trailer Park Boys recently.

So I’m sending a letter from the past. It’s Feb 21st 2022 and I just talked to you this weekend. You sounded pretty upbeat and happy. You were helping your friend move house. Is that friend still around?

It was great to hear you sounding happy. And at least if things weren’t going your way you still seem to be being positive about them.

Right now, it’s been a couple of weeks since Amy came back to Australia. We miss each other a lot but support each other in what we’re doing. I wonder where we all will be when you receive this. Right now, I’m hoping I’ll still be chilling in Thailand, maybe even not working.

All right, take it easy, young man.
Love
Dad

Looking Good – 9th January 2022

This shiny apple, so appetising
Fools your sense without realising
Inside, the maggots, breeding more
In fact, it is rotten to the core

We sold the apple, sold it well
From the outside, no one can tell
This analogy can be multiplied
Across your beautiful nation wide

Within is decay, or already dead
No matter all the pretty words said
A conspiracy in which we all take part
Only the truth can fix this heart


Fuck the fuck off back to where you fucked on from.

Ricky LeFleur, Trailer Park Boys

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to the lady that gave me a 2-hour massage yesterday. It was painful but awesome and I’m still in pain now, but awesome now!


I slept super well last night after a spoonful of kratom and feel great this morning, though I’m too early for Tha Sut and no cafes are open yet, so I’m back here writing.

Yesterday was relaxed but the time disappeared quickly. In the morning, Amy and I took Na up to the university cafe for her English lesson and it was good to go somewhere different. Na was very sweet when she said that she will miss Amy.

After lunch, I watched the Youth Brigade/Stern Brothers documentary, which was pretty inspiring and reminded me that I also wanted to start a Better Youth Organisation in Dorset. I didn’t know what I was doing, just as the Sterns admitted but I wonder turn my life would have been like if anyone had responded to my leaflet to do something more like that.

After that, it was time for a deliciously painful massage that loosened up a few places in my body and made me contemplate my future with my hips. Will I need some kind of operation at some point? What can I do now to delay that possibility?

I left Amy in the city to meet her friends and came back to watch some TV bits and pieces and chill out with kratom and before you know it, the day’s gone.

Today we’ll go shopping and hopefully not much else. Life is great.

What’s The Point Of Your Third Eye When The First Two Are Blind? – 13th December 2021

Standing in the garden at night
Looking up at the brightest star
The darkness blankets me in comfort
I cannot fathom where you are

I’m just beginning my investigation
An infinite universe to explore
I’m not afraid of this vagueness
It’s what every idea is for

It’s a new way of seeing
A view of the world with open eyes
No limits to where I roam
With childlike wonder and surprise

Repressed ideas often leak out
But they no longer make me afraid
I challenge myself for the pleasure
Of this wonderful life I’ve made


Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that Amy got up with me this morning to join my abs workout. It was tough for her.


The crappy TV break yesterday was less than crappy. It was perfect.

I watched some YouTube videos and some Trailer Park Boys. I dismissed TPB when it first aired because it wasn’t laugh-out-loud funny, just amusing stereotypes at play. After 15 years, I decided to give it another shot and I’m glad I did. One thing I like about it is the appearance of how much fun they must have had making it. I’m very curious what these people are like in real life but I don’t want to find out yet, that would spoil the illusion for me.

The environment for the setting of the show reminds me so much of when I used to visit Turlin Moor with Justin and, occasionally, Rupert and Jeremy. Looking back, that place was scary. Turlin Moor was an area in Poole where recently released convicts were rehoused. Needless to say, not many had been rehabilitated.

I don’t really remember how often I went there but it was enough to feel somewhat welcome and protected. We hung out at a family house. A mother (Pam) with two kids and then all the other wastrels hanging around. There was usually 10 to 12 people lounging around the living room.

I never went on my own, always with Justin, though I may have stayed there overnight sometimes and Justin went to his home, which was within walking distance.

Friendly though the people there were, they weren’t always the brightest sparks and trouble was never far away. I managed to avoid getting involved and just relished this little family community that accepted anyone.

My other main watch this weekend was on YouTube, where I discovered someone had uploaded the Sensational Swans video. Something I’d been trying to find since its release in late 2005. It was available to buy from the Sydney Swans website but I didn’t want to pay full price for it and hoped it would turn up in the video store and I could just rent it and rip it. I did that with the release of the Grand Final from that year but the Sensational Swans was an hour and a half review of the whole season. In comparison the final was not so excting.

Anyway, watching this on the weekend got me wound up. Remembering names and goals and faces but the best/worst things was feeling the tension watching the little game reviews, even though I already knew the result.

I love watching the AFL and the Swans (when we play well). I’m excited for the coming season already.