Tag: Ween

Little Miss Imperfect – 16th February 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

It was a missing tooth
Some wayward hair
A smudge of a nose
That almost wasn’t there

It was a crooked smile
Dry cracked lips
An inch too much
Sitting on her hips

It was a minor lisp
One leg longer
A scarred wrist
Now grown stronger

No, she’s not perfect
As far as all could see
But it’s all those little faults
That has attracted me

Today I’m feeling:

Pretty good.  I did some chest and arm exercises this morning, trying to avoid straining my shoulder and also hanging for a minute to stretch myself out.  Had my first cold morning shower of the year, which was a bit of a challenge but sure woke me up properly.

Today I’m grateful for:

Nong Ploy for saying that she wishes I was still her teacher because she enjoys writing in English the most, which is something I like to have the students practice.  And then have them read from what they’ve written.

The best thing about today was:

The winding down and relaxing feeling of the end of the semester.  

I was trying to put myself in my student’s shoes about how they must feel each day, being amongst their friends at school all day and then going home to their families each evening.  They obviously enjoy being at school and being with their friends but suffer the having to study part of that.  

I was trying to remember what it was like for me at their age.  Usually, I was excited to get out of school because when I got home I was usually out again after eating dinner and having even more fun with my friends.  

The situation here feels different both because of the family set-up in many homes and the availability of mobile phones and internet.  It makes for an experience that I only understand as an adult, not as a growing child.

Something I learned today?

“OpenAI’s latest model takes text prompts and turns them into ‘complex scenes with multiple characters, specific types of motion,’ and more, the company said.

The text-to-video model allows users to create photorealistic videos up to a minute long – all based on prompts they’ve written.”

As AI improves, and it seems to be doing so quickly, this could go either way.   Folks could create and post anything that conforms to their narratives.  

For example, the BBC could post footage of concentration camps in Xinjiang, where they keep insisting they exist.  People could easily believe it, especially when it is reinforced with pictures and videos.  

However, I also want to look on the positive side that due to this new capability journalists will be forced to detail, verify, check and double-check and be held legally accountable for what they publish.  It’s optimistic but that is the way it must go.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

At the morning flag ceremony KanomBang was crying heavily as her beloved dog had died.  She was inconsolable so I just put my arm around her and gently patted her arm.  Other students were still laughing and playing and I’m not sure what they were saying but Nomsen gave her some sympathy and support too.  She was ok by the afternoon and showed me a picture of her dog and told me it had been hit by a motorbike which is a common occurrence here unfortunately.

I called and messaged Khaofang as her jumper was in the classroom where she lost it the day before yesterday.  When she came to collect it she was very appreciative.

What was peaceful about today?

It’s difficult to find peace when you are surrounded by thousands of students. So perhaps the first hour of the day, having just woken up and quietly brushing my teeth before going to exercise, feeding the cats and then hopping into the shower, all the while the sky slowly lightening into the morning bloom.  Then I eat some breakfast whilst reading a little and the sun finally appears over the mountains and it’s time for the peace to end.

At the end of the day, post-shower and into bed.  Amy on her side, me on mine and Cap swapping between us, Amy quietly scrolls through Facebook and I read books and comics until we both give in to the joy of sleep.

25 THINGS ABOUT LIFE I WISH I HAD KNOWN 10 YEARS AGO –  18. Give Without Expecting Something in Return. Don’t keep score. You will become a bitter person if you do that. Give solely for the joy of giving. If you get something in return, great, if you don’t, great.

I may not give out too much but I expect and want little from anyone else.  

Over the last few years, I have started giving out gifts as random acts of kindness and my only hope would be that the receiver will pass on the kindness to someone else.  

Whether they do or not is out of my control.

What was my Ween discovery timeline?

I had read about Ween often in Flipside and was curious when their first album God Ween Satan came out so I picked up a copy.  It started off well and punky with You Fucked Up but I was unprepared for everything else that came on the rest of the album.  Slowly it worked its wackiness on me and I enjoyed its eclecticism over time.  

So when the second LP, The Pod,  came out I was looking for more of the same and it didn’t deliver for me.  This seemed like weird droning moaning music and so I gave up on them, even selling both discs.

I occasionally heard them on the radio when I was living in Australia with their ‘hit’s Push The Little Daisies and Voodoo Lady but didn’t think on much further about them.

Around 2010 sometime, my friend in Melbourne, James McGauren had met and fallen in love with a Swedish girl and was making the move there and he decided to sell off a big chunk of his music collection.  He had all the Ween albums.  

Fuck it, I thought, I’ll give these guys a go again and picked up the whole catalogue for cheap.  Slowly I worked my way through each album and fell in love with them all.  I scoured the internet to find quality live shows and all their demo recordings and ended up with about 50 discs worth of Ween to enjoy.

Listening back to The Pod these days, I can understand why I didn’t enjoy it at the time but now I rate it as a favourite.  

I never saw them live but have their live DVD and whilst I appreciate their entertainment abilities I prefer the quirkiness of their records.

I took this picture because this old man was looking relaxed when I got home.
Fatman report

Recognition Of Reality – 22nd December 2022

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Am I sitting down yet?
Are my feet touching the floor?
No recognition of reality
Is it worth existing anymore
Am I breathing air?
Is blood pumping through my veins?
No recognition of a life itself
No usefulness remains

*inspired by a story from Seneca

You determine the quality of your mind by the nature of your daily thoughts.

Robert Greene, Daily Laws

Today I’m feeling:
Happy but a little on edge
Today I’m grateful for:
Our air fryer which nicely cooked the Hainan ginger fake chicken I ate for dinner with rice and cucumber (to counter the hot chilli sauce dressing). Amy has made me 3 servings to freeze for when she has gone too. I suppose I could learn to use the fryer too but I just don’t bother cooking by myself.
The best thing about today was:
Undoubtedly, both my classes which I took a very relaxed attitude towards whilst still having the kids semi-engaged with activities. Even the kids that get annoyed with me did some work and seemed to enjoy what we were doing. Some days I love them all. Today was one of those days. Tomorrow should be too. One class making Christmas cards and another two just doing online quizzes and then it’s the weekend again (finally – last night I thought it would be Friday today until I realised it wouldn’t and felt the energy drain out of me!)
What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?
Amy is grumpy today, maybe PMT, so I’m trying to not bite at her and let it pass. I’m not always successful and she got angry when I misheard her about something and reacted badly. I let it blow over and apologised for misunderstanding and just tried to carry on as if nothing happened. I don’t think we’ll have good communication for the rest of the night, so let it lie and wake up tomorrow to a brand new sunny day, or at least we get to start again.
Something I learned today?
Hayden has Covid again. Hopefully, it’s not as bad as the first time and he recovers soon. I messaged Ellen too, who I haven’t been in contact with for about six months and since China relaxed their lockdown policy a couple of weeks ago, she and many of her clients got Covid too. I think China’s tough covid policy was the best way to deal with it and hopefully, now the virus is weaker there will be fewer deaths from infections. It’s amazing to me that other countries didn’t take it as seriously.
What tattoo do you want and where would you put it?
The next tattoo I get will be some Cardiacs lyrics on my right calf. I also want to get a Boognish tattoo but not quite sure where yet. Still thinking about the weird Trumans Water Spasm Smash cover too.

I took this picture because there’s spiders living in the trees!

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #70 – Dead End – 27th December 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Shut Down! Dead! Run out of town!  Sheltering over the border, we bring this one last episode before fleeing the despots.  One day we’ll be back!  Look out for DJ Donut Trump – he’ll bring you the future of rock ‘n’ roll.

This week there’s all sorts of music – weird, noisy, experimental, fucked up strangeness, straight-up punk and pop all delivered with no compromise.  Join our other 3 listeners to check out the end!

Incidentals taken from the Church of the Sub Genius Hour of Slack.

Listen right here or Mixcloud, Stitcher, Apple, Amazon…..all those cool places I guess.

https://www.facebook.com/The-Chiang-Rai-Alternative-Hour-107307097314670/

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for all the students I have met since I started teaching. I have learned something from all of them.

The dearth of new ideas makes us wallow in our shame (The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #16) – 14th December 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 1 Comment

I’ve been considering what content I can put here as some of my personal thoughts and feelings about this particular place I am now living (and enjoying) could cause me trouble. It’s funny how Thailand is known as the Land of Smiles but often times it feels like the Land of Fake Smiles. Having a couple of years experience here now, I understand these reasons but cannot fully support a positive attitude towards it. This is the balance I am trying to find in my world.

Perhaps that balance has always been there even in the other places I have lived but I haven’t noticed it so much and oftentimes found myself in difficult or at least odd situations. I don’t ‘play the game’ very well still but I’m getting there. If this sounds like generalised waffle, I apologise. I will try to make an orderly composition of my thoughts at some point.

Out of one of the most difficult times I’ve had in Thailand I found myself keen to focus some energy into something personally (and somewhat selfishly) fulfilling. In what little downtime I had when I was pushing myself too hard preparing lessons for my grade 5 English class I would throw my iTunes playlist on shuffle and found myself quite enthralled at the collection of digital music I collected.

The randomness reminded me of those late school nights furtively listening to John Peel’s radio show under the covers, falling asleep as I lay hoping to hear the latest and greatest punk tunes in amongst all the other genres being pioneered. This exposure to many different styles of music laid the groundwork for events many years in the future when I was organising shows for bands in Sydney and subconsciously decided on mix billed being the best way for people to hear new music. Never a way to a successful financial business model, it kept my brain satisfied and able to calmly appreciate music I didn’t particularly enjoy, anticipating music that I would.

So it was that iTunes on shuffle kept popping up a classic tune (classic to me), a dodgy old punk demo, an experimental noise soundscape and a 60s garage rocker, with many things in between. Nothing really modern mainstream though. It’s amazing some of the music from my youth was considered mainstream back then. It shits all over what is mainstream now.

Anyway, digging this vibe I even ended up downloading a bunch of reggae and African music that Peel always used to play – just to try and get that reminiscence in full force. Things I may not listen to as a full recording of suddenly make a lot of sense squished in between things I was more familiar with. I ended up down many paths of discovery of experimental music from around the world – as opposed to ‘world music.’

With need of some distraction, I decided to put together a ‘radio’ show and upload the result to the Mixcloud platform. I mostly take the tracks as they were shuffled through iTunes and do a bit of back announcing. I also decided to play around a little with some of the songs and introduce some moments where I could read a paragraph or two from books from my shelves.

To give this odd mix a little focus I decided to target my audience to the university students at the local uni which is less than a kilometre away from where I am. I roped in a few of my student friends from there and also from my favourite local coffee shop, to do a bit of speaking and to have their pictures taken. So was born The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour and the push for musical world domination.

The tenzenmen music library
Gus, Mink, Nu and Aing – in the music library.

Understanding that my tastes are almost niche beyond niche I would not expect a huge audience for what I’m doing but really that is not the purpose. I do it for myself. I really enjoy putting it together and messing around with things, trying to come up with some new ideas for presentation. I’m contemplating how to do this mix in a live setting and finding a place to do it but I don’t have much time to practice that part as well as not having a completely reliable equipment setup. A new laptop is a little out of reach at the moment.

So, if you’ve read this far you may be curious to hear what these shows sound like? Or scared to find out. Either way, it seems like this is a good vehicle to post links to each show and also force me to write at least once a week as new episodes appear.

“Remember life on earth is but a flash of dawn
And we’re all part of it as the day rolls on”

Music from Ween, Magic Mushroom Band, No Babies, The Ebonettes, goat, Andy Partridge, Acanthus, Banned, Hebosagil, The Yellow Payges, Bad Brains, Daniel Striped Tiger, Martin Archer, Teenage Depression, Mudhoney and Donovan.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that I could do so many things yesterday and keep going even though I was so tired by the end of the evening. I kept a good attitude and wasn’t so anxious about things that I wanted to do compared with some things that I had to do.

Did it list

  • Encouraged Fern to learn to make my coffee at Utopia.
  • Got my haircut.
  • Uploaded TCRAH podcast.
  • Recorded new TCRAH podcast.
  • Prepared and executed a quick fun game for my two students today.
  • Got through a little of the never-ending sorting of music, on computer and CDs.
  • Wrote another blog post and enjoyed the process of writing.
  • Got passport photocopies done.
  • Rosie offered to do quick drawings and send them out as postcards. What an awesome idea so I asked her to do Jochen, Lachlan and Kyaw Kyaw.
  • Finished reading Lonely Boy

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #13 – 23rd November 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Music from DMBQ, Sebadoh, Belly Button, Units, Amateur Drunks, Round Eye, Blame Game, Minutemen, Ilaiyaraaja, Ween, Motorhead, Széki Kurva, The St Thomas Pepper Smelter, Hebosagil, Tall Dwarfs, DNA, The Milkshakes, Samla Mammas Manna and Pryapisme.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be working in schools and with a not so serious expectation of my teaching skills. Of course, I always try to improve but the fact it is a little more relaxed has meant that I can enjoy interacting with the kids more. I don’t see many of they other teachers getting involved in the same way so much especially not the Thai teachers. All the kids want to talk to me all the time. I feel like I am a great asset to the school. I hope the school feels the same.*

17th Apr 2021 – * – It didn’t.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #12 – 16th November 2019

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Music from Ibrahim Maalouf, Pm 7_Jupiter, Vialka, Doctor Coffee, The Fugs, The Fall, Pavement, The Dickies, Turnpike, France Gall, WannFunTastiKlons, uSSSy, Birthday Party, Ween, The Who and And So I Watch You From Afar.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that I have learned not to be afraid to stand up for what I believe in and also accept those consequences even if they are not in my favour. Others may do things differently and that’s their choice.

11th Apr 2021 – You’ll have to keep reading to find out more about those consequences – the period between September 2019 and March 2020 was very trying indeed! The last sentence mention of ‘others’ is just about the advice given by other teachers to me and how some considered that it is impossible for a farang to change and improve things within any Thai system. I fought against it and arguably, I lost – at least at the time. Longer term though I consider the minor changes I did create were worth the effort. Being a teacher is not about taking it easy for me, it’s a responsibility. I see others putting up and shutting up, but to me, that is just lazy. Never give up.