Tag: YaYa

In Her Sleep – 8th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 10 Comments
Image credit; Marianna Smiley @ Unsplash “Thrive” by Danial Pooper a sculpture in Fort Lauderdale, Florida.

Under her ribs
(She spread them open
Pulled apart with the strength
Only a goddess can claim)

Under her ribs
Exposed for all to see
Grows the green heart
Life given, life giver

Her perfection cracked
Time-worn and serene
Her beauty unaffected
Welcome to her world

Welcome to thrive
Life sprouted on edges
Breathing in the goodness
Breathing out goodness
In her sleep

Shared with WDYS #237
16th Aug 2024 – Shared with Ragtag Daily Prompt – cracked

Today I’m feeling:

Good again.  Pretty peppy with an underlying exhaustion just from adjustment to this routine again.  

Mai, Dave and Yaya, along with Mai’s parents, arrive in Chiang Rai this morning and Amy will be busy with them for the next four days and I’ll be joining them after work this afternoon.

Today I’m grateful for:

Our step ladder so that I can try and organise our vine plant to grow over our entertainment area and perhaps stop a little of the rain in the future, though will undoubtedly block the gutters with dead leaves too.

The best thing about today was:

Getting on top of everything in preparation for being back in the classroom.  I think I have a fairly clear idea for each class now and can adapt as I go.  It was a good feeling to be back in the game so to speak.

I had felt pretty on the ball at the start of the holiday but then slacked off a lot for the last three weeks.  I put up a self imposed barrier in my mind though thankfully found it easy to overcome.  Though I’m damned tired right now!  Tired but feeling great and positive.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I felt increasingly positive and happy as the day has gone on and nothing could stand in my way or bother me.

Something I learned today?

Mai’s husband Dave was so excited when he got to Thailand that he overindulged in smoking too much weed last night and had to spend the day sleeping today, so I haven’t actually seen him yet.

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

I drove Amy and I back into the city at 5 pm and the traffic is getting busy again after the holidays.  I picked up Mai and her family and took us to the restaurant for a really nice meal with Amy’s mum and dad joining too.

I took this picture because this is another Yaya that I know.

Plucky – 7th May 2024

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ 2 Comments

Pray tell me, where it is you go
Lady of this loveless moon
Underneath the stars on show
Could it be considered too soon?
Kisses taken nice and slow
Youthful daring saw this romance bloom

Submitted to RDP – Plucky

Today I’m feeling:

Exhausted (at the end of the day).  I got through the morning exercise easily, hurting my legs further after two 10,000-step days.

I kept running ok throughout the day but once home in the afternoon, I flaked pretty quickly.

Today I’m grateful for:

Kru Keng and Kru Bright, who provided me with a table to store my stuff in their room in the new building, where I will generally be teaching now.

The building is a little removed from the rest of the school but if I keep parking out by the cafe it means I will have to walk through the canteen and the main playground so I will be sure to still meet many of my students.

The best thing about today was:

Meeting the new teacher in Primary. He’s an Aussie ‘activist’, obviously a weed smoker and hinted at being a conspiracy theorist.  He was quite interesting to talk to for a while as he had been in China around the same time I was there and knew some of the bands.

He mentioned how much he was looking forward to teaching here but I got the feeling from his personality that he won’t last long.

12th Dec 2024 – I found out later that he didn’t even make it a full week!

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

Back to school, back to disorganisation.  There was a message about the Songkran blessing with the school directors and I was told it would start at nine, so I got back from coffee at that time but then the word was that it would be somewhere between 10 and 11.

I contemplated going back to the cafe but instead decided to check out where I could put my things in the new building and after moving my things, the teachers there told me it was just about to start.

No sign of George or David (though I had heard he was spotted there in the morning) so I was the only representative of the high school English teachers.  Hopefully, someone has noted that somewhere that I have been a good boy!

Review your acts, and then for vile deeds chide yourself, for good be glad. — Discourses 3.10

A customer at House left their charger in the wall and I alerted Ying, the latest new staff there, who ran out and gave it back.

I also dropped the word search book around to Baipad this afternoon.

After I closed the gate this evening, Amy ran out asking me to take her to the twenty-baht shop to buy a gift for Yaya, Nong Mai’s daughter, who we will meet tomorrow.  A minor annoyance but at least the 200 metre ride to the shop was nice, cool and refreshing!

Did you do something difficult or challenging today?

Back in long pants and long sleeves, I was heating up quickly and easily today.  I didn’t complain though and just got on with everything.

I should have been doing more lesson plans but ended up writing more poetry and updating the blog.  I did scan over what I still need to update and tomorrow, I will work on the next couple of IELTS lessons and Thursday, more of the presentation lessons and then Friday figuring out what else I need to add.  I just put the seed in my mind for today.

My old student from grade 7, Yaya, sent me this picture because I asked her to. I usually send her a message once a year to see how she is doing since she moved away. She was another smart kid and I’m happy to see her doing well. She appreciates my asking after her too.

Beautiful Idea – 8th April 2023

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Always searching for the elusive
Open to interpretation
Blown along like leaves in the wind
To catch on to inspiration
There’s no dogma here on the fence
With a view of the garden on each side
Just going along with the flow
And the push and pull of the tide
We’re humbled by the mysterious
In awe of those who rage
There’s a beautiful idea here
Just waiting for the page

inspired by Red Hand Files #229

Today I’m feeling:

Flat, sad. The fucking smoke outside isn’t helping as the light barely gets beyond a dusklike feeling all day. It’s like a typical English dull grey weekend sky. This just makes me want to sleep. The slight mood upswing yesterday has been brought right back to earth. How do I miss a cat so much? Is it my mistake to have focused all my love onto Kim without even realizing it. Is it safer to not love?

Today I’m grateful for:

Amy being able to visit Mai in Albury which helps distract from her own feeling of loss and discomfort at not being here. It’s hard for me to be enthusiastic on video calls but seeing Mai’s daughter YaYa is pretty entertaining as she is a very lively and active 5-year-old.

The best thing about today was:

I’m still unenthusiastic but the first coffee was good and the 20 baht of strawberries I picked up outside 7/11 were ripe and juicy. It’s good that the garden got taken care of and also to see Amy and YaYa.

What was out of your control today and how did you handle it?

I’ve not quite got a grip on my emotions yet and finding it hard to be here without Amy. I know things will get better and it will take time. 

Something I learned today?

I came across the movie Made in Britain on YouTube today. I can remember watching it in 1982 and being excited by the music and the fucked up attitude of Trevor, played by Tim Roth. I seem to recall being confused by it at the time because it wasn’t clear to me what the message might have been as it amounts to either conform or go to prison. I know that was the purpose of the movie, that there didn’t seem to be any other options but that was little consolation to angry 14-year-old me. My solution was to run away to Australia which I think was the best decision of my life. Watching it again now made me kind of unhappily nostalgic. Those times were depressing yet they were all I knew. I guess inside I did still have a will to find a way out because that’s what happened. I can’t imagine what I would be doing if I was still stuck there. I was useless, with a bad attitude but I never had the guts to do the dumb things Trevor did in the movie. When my old schoolmate Jeremy boasts about having been in prison I don’t think that’s something to be proud of. Fuck I’m glad those times are over yet I still wish I could live them again.

Describe a perfect day from start to finish.

Right now I feel like answering this like my students would answer it – sleeping!


I took this picture because the gardeners came today and cleaned things up but this picture still reflects my sadness as all the things are still set up in Kim’s room in the centre. Going in there and sorting things act may be the final admission that she’s gone. I still can’t understand it.