Tag: Amy

Your house is falling down (The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #67 – Frightened and Scared) – 4th December 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

This one is not a morning scribble but at night and I want to get some thoughts out before I try to meditate which I didn’t do for a few weeks and I can feel my head whirling, whirling.

Step out, step out! Nothing lasts forever. Step out, step out – demolition – look at it fall down.

Distraction. Music is a distraction and I love it. I love my room – my room from youth and now I return – here in my room. No window, ceiling or floor!

Music, music, music. People in and out. Relationships, people – why do I find it so difficult?

Never mind, I think I’m okay. I’m fine I don’t need to find excuses. Inside my head is okay – when I’m feeling okay – I don’t need anything or anyone – except my one true friend. I love Amy very deeply I’m a little scared if anything happens between us but I know I’ll be okay. Everything is always okay. The world spins. And all those cliches. But anyway – it’s not something I think about really – not something likely to happen as far as I know. Out, out, out, you fleeting thoughts – settle down and breathe deep.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to each of my students for the different ways they make me think. It’s a nice challenge to everything.

Imagine a world where children are not sexually harassed by their teachers…

Now listen…..

This week there’s music from The Nubs, The Sawtooth Grin, Jesus Lizard, Theatre of Hate, Spermicide, Gelbart, Abali, Esmectatons, Radio Myanmar, Big Black, Secret Chiefs 3, Miss Madeline, George Danquah, Karate and OMFO.

Incidentals taken from the Church of the Sub Genius Hour of Slack.
Listen right here or Podbean, Stitcher, Apple, Amazon…..all those cool places I guess.

https://www.facebook.com/The-Chiang-Rai-Alternative-Hour-107307097314670/ (the Facebook page got hijacked!)

We got that attitude! – 23rd November 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

I am so happy and grateful for everything in my home. I love it there. I love to watch the garden growing and changing over time. I love all the different ideas Amy comes up with to change things around.
I am so happy and grateful to be able to afford a MIDI keyboard and to have time to experiment and mess around with it. I hope I can learn how to use it properly.

2nd Feb 2023 – I can’t believe I’ve had the keyboard for two years already. It still sits in front of my computer screen generally gathering dust. It’s not that I couldn’t have time to use it but that I have enjoyed playing guitar regularly and at the moment I’m more focused on getting old information uploaded to here, which is a pretty monumental task. Also, despite my loving my home, the set up of my desk and computer are not really conducive for sitting for long periods of time so it’s not quite comfortable. I know it will take a good period of time, effort and concentration to learn to use the keyboard in the way that I want (actually it’s the software, not the keyboard particularly) but I am still weirdly optimistic that I will make more time in the future!

Got up on the wrong side of life this morning – 10th November 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Empty nonsense in here. Bitch Magnet – John Fine – Your Band Sucks. Reminds me of me. Just wanted to rock.

What is life outside? Happiness – I’m content but Amy is so unhappy. Resolution must be found. It’s easy here for me, my style makes it easy. But I can live anywhere – I just don’t want to make my life harder. I don’t see the point. But we will start thinking about how and when to move back to Australia. I can live anywhere so long as I have my things around me. I have lots I want to do and can be done from anywhere.

Poor Amy I don’t like to see her so sad.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for all my years of life. I’m reading Jon Fine’s book at the moment and it takes me right back to the desperate feelings I had in my early twenties. Those feelings got us both to where we are today, for better or worse. I am grateful that I have the opportunity to be able to look back and reflect on this.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #61 – 24th October 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The dumbest rock podcast on the internet as voted by everyone, everywhere. Dumber than the POTUS.

Highly curated, carefully selected and specifically ordered* for your listening edification by world-renowned DJtenzenmen, who has over 500 years of experience in this business.

This week there’s music from An Atomic Whirl, Diminished Men, Magma, Indian Jewelry, Liliput, KLS, Funkadelic, Bee Gees, Captain Sensible, The Skatallites, Unwound, Peter Black, Not From There, Dinosaur Jr, Nothing Painted Blue, Rudimentary Peni, MnM’s and KEN Mode.

ARE YOU READY TO BE THE DUMBEST PRESIDENT EVER!?

Find us on Twitter and Facebook too. Tell us if you like it, tell us if you don’t.
Listen right here or Mixcloud, Stitcher, Apple, Amazon…..all those cool places I guess.

* ie totally random.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to love and trust and have the love and trust of Amy. We understand our quirks, thinking and opinions. It’s just so great that we found each other.

The Chiang Rai Alternative Hour #58 – 2nd October 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

The most challenging rock podcast on the internet as voted by everyone, everywhere.

Highly curated, carefully selected and specifically ordered for your listening edification by world-renowned DJtenzenmen, who has over 50 years of experience in this business.

This week there’s music from Mission of Burma, The Darkening Scale, Karl Blake, Dysrhythmia, Sonic Youth, Hawkwind, Billy Childish and the Blackhands, No Submission, Zoo Types, Kid Creole and the Coconuts, Parquet Courts, Orthrelm, Cause For Effect, Jimi Hendrix, Everyone To The Anderson, Terminal Cheesecake and Ian Dury and the Blockheads.

Intro and background music by Utotem, Phantom Tollbooth, Daniel Striped Tiger and someone else I forgot.
Incidentals taken from the Church of the Sub Genius Hour of Slack.

ARE YOU READY FOR THE CHALLENGE!?

Find us on Twitter and Facebook too. Tell us if you like it, tell us if you don’t.
Listen right here or Podbean, Stitcher, Apple, Amazon…..all those cool places I guess.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to share my life with Amy. Even though I enjoy being by myself I miss her being around when she goes away. I know she does lots of work around the house and it takes me a long time to do all those things.

I like it when it’s over and another one’s begun – 29th September 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Image is AI-generated ‘a cat dreaming about birds’

Quick one. Kim staring at me. What’s in her brain – what does a cat think about? Dream about. Birds! Birds chattering – go away cat!

Forgot Drops yesterday. Oh no! 60-day streak gone. Oh well – get up, go again.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that Amy can go to Bangkok and visit her friends and we don’t have to worry about money, I can stay and look after the cats and fish and then next month we can go to Phuket together.

You need some kickin’, not just sittin’ – 28th August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Busy day ahead but ready for it. Slept in the same position most of the night – must be tired out. Slept deep and well though – feel good – full workout this morning, proud of myself.

I do a lot – sometimes too much but the thing is that ‘I do’. Do something.

Gratitude Journal

I’m so happy and grateful for my deep sleep last night. I feel good.

To-do list

  • Keep that positive energy buzzing ✅
  • Full workout in the morning ✅
  • Compliments and awards ½
  • Blog posts and TCRAH recording on Sunday ✅

School on Friday was busy and rewarding. I had to take time out to talk to one student, Aon, because he was disturbing other students. He’s a good kid, pretty smart, but he can’t stop talking. After several warnings, I asked him to leave. He didn’t want to and I told him that’s OK if he’s not interested in my lesson but there are other students who are and he is stopping them from learning.

It was nice to see that everyone picked up on the gravity of this little time out. The rest of the class was fun.

Saturday afternoon Amy and I went to Mae Sai. I could feel that Amy wasn’t quite her usual happy self – but unhappy but a little sharp and direct in her conversation. She was happy again as we arrived at the market and quickly got to shopping and headed off to Chiang Saen for pizza. It was starting to get dark and I had a splitting headache.

At one point I went the wrong way and Amy got a little upset because I stopped and looked at Google Maps because I wanted to understand exactly where we were. She was right and I turned round and went in the right direction. The conversation died as I struggled to see the road but I wasn’t going to let Amy’s bad feelings affect me. I enjoyed listening to music and drove a little slower because I wanted to hear more.

Amy warmed up a little by the time we got home but I think by then we were both worn out and went to bed and to sleep. I was happy with the way I handled the situation and didn’t escalate any bad feelings. After all, it was only a slight issue. I think we understand each other well and we know our own, and each other’s, faults and behaviours very well.

Some might feel that our relationship is boring and stale but I think we are happy and understanding. I love this relationship so much.

Today (Sunday) I was happy to record two podcasts and sort out all sorts of little bits and pieces in my room. I’ll have to sort out those little annoying ants in there soon.

My days feel full but mostly without stress. I have lots of things I want to do but know I could drop dead tomorrow – really there’s no rush. It’s pretty insignificant in the scheme of things. I’m just happy to do what I’m doing whether it is interesting or not. I’m happy with this attitude.