Tag: brain dump

Get my kicks, feel alright -1st September 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Swipe away the ants.

Woke up early and thinking about school and teaching. Maybe I don’t need to push so hard – I don’t want to be thinking so much about it. But I enjoy it and get a kick out of watching kids grow and learn. Why I didn’t do that for Hayden? Guess I did what I could. Circumstances didn’t always help.

Fatman Report

Weight: 79.1kg
Resting heart rate: 54

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for access to YouTube to be able to watch interesting and thought-provoking videos. It’s my own private learning.

Adventures will await you – 31st August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Nice dreams but don’t recall. Sleepy – wake up. Tired, learning time just now. Slow reactions.

Already thinking about class. It’s fine, I’m enjoying it. I’m enjoying everything. Keep going.

Get fit – don’t push it. Healthy body, healthy mind. Enjoy everything – there’s no time – there is lots of time. Full days, things get done. Balance. Washing and reading. Cleaning and music.

You did good. You do good. Chase away the snakes!

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to be able to grab coffee at school, even though it is not tasty it does the job and gets me going.

To-do list

  • Compliments and awards ½
  • Savouring
  • Random act of kindness ✅
  • Thank you mantra ½

A good couple of days. I notice that I have been talking a lot – a little bit like I’m on a high and just want to talk about stuff and I’m hoping it’s not a bipolar type high that is followed by a low.

I woke up at around 5 am this morning and couldn’t get back to sleep because I was thinking about classes and students. I really don’t want to get so involved with them that it keeps me awake. I remember what it was like before when I was working in Primary. I’m really happy with all the positive interactions I have with the students – they make me laugh a lot.

We have Monday and Friday off, so another nice long weekend. Tomorrow I really want to take some time to savour something.

You need some kickin’, not just sittin’ – 28th August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Busy day ahead but ready for it. Slept in the same position most of the night – must be tired out. Slept deep and well though – feel good – full workout this morning, proud of myself.

I do a lot – sometimes too much but the thing is that ‘I do’. Do something.

Gratitude Journal

I’m so happy and grateful for my deep sleep last night. I feel good.

To-do list

  • Keep that positive energy buzzing ✅
  • Full workout in the morning ✅
  • Compliments and awards ½
  • Blog posts and TCRAH recording on Sunday ✅

School on Friday was busy and rewarding. I had to take time out to talk to one student, Aon, because he was disturbing other students. He’s a good kid, pretty smart, but he can’t stop talking. After several warnings, I asked him to leave. He didn’t want to and I told him that’s OK if he’s not interested in my lesson but there are other students who are and he is stopping them from learning.

It was nice to see that everyone picked up on the gravity of this little time out. The rest of the class was fun.

Saturday afternoon Amy and I went to Mae Sai. I could feel that Amy wasn’t quite her usual happy self – but unhappy but a little sharp and direct in her conversation. She was happy again as we arrived at the market and quickly got to shopping and headed off to Chiang Saen for pizza. It was starting to get dark and I had a splitting headache.

At one point I went the wrong way and Amy got a little upset because I stopped and looked at Google Maps because I wanted to understand exactly where we were. She was right and I turned round and went in the right direction. The conversation died as I struggled to see the road but I wasn’t going to let Amy’s bad feelings affect me. I enjoyed listening to music and drove a little slower because I wanted to hear more.

Amy warmed up a little by the time we got home but I think by then we were both worn out and went to bed and to sleep. I was happy with the way I handled the situation and didn’t escalate any bad feelings. After all, it was only a slight issue. I think we understand each other well and we know our own, and each other’s, faults and behaviours very well.

Some might feel that our relationship is boring and stale but I think we are happy and understanding. I love this relationship so much.

Today (Sunday) I was happy to record two podcasts and sort out all sorts of little bits and pieces in my room. I’ll have to sort out those little annoying ants in there soon.

My days feel full but mostly without stress. I have lots of things I want to do but know I could drop dead tomorrow – really there’s no rush. It’s pretty insignificant in the scheme of things. I’m just happy to do what I’m doing whether it is interesting or not. I’m happy with this attitude.

I’m alright, I’m alive – 20th August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Good Vibrations by the Beach Boys? Where did that come from?

Building myself up to do my five minutes of exercise, tired this morning – don’t want to, want to sleep more – push through.

Crazy Kim was here trying to climb to the highest point. What is in the mind of a cat?

Go to Hill tribe school today – hope it’s okay – worry the kids can’t understand what to do. What’s Plan B?

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful to have Dad’s truck so I can drive to the hill tribe school today.

To-do list

  • Laugh and enjoy the day ✅
  • Make sure others enjoy their day too ½
  • Compliment new people (anyone really) ½
  • Another blog post when you get home ½

It’s a week later already. I have managed to fill my time up with many things including converting old DVDs, pushing and promoting the podcast, watching interesting TV and documentaries along with most of the usual things I’ve been doing such as school and online teaching.

I’ve been working with a girl called Kelly who has taken a few lessons to warm up but I was very heartened to see her become more confident and sure of herself in her speaking. That made me feel like my effort was worthwhile.

It can be the opposite at school where you can feel you are getting nowhere. I think I have successfully managed to understand this scenario now though and it will be a very long and slow process for things to improve.

Currently, there are lots of student protests in Thailand – more free and democratic government, less corruption and more equality. This too has been going on for nearly a hundred years. Things change slowly here.

I’ve been happy with myself recently and been able to deal with sudden changes and minorly stressful situations. I think I’ve become a better person and always looking to move that forward.

Tomorrow is my long teaching day – including in the evening but I’m looking forward to going to Mae Sai on the weekend and also dropping by an orphanage for girls to see what we can do for them. I hope that I can get involved in some way.

We got that attitude! – 10th August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Brain dump – not sure date – two-day break from routine – hard to maintain on weekend but I really should try to do it. Stop with tramadol. Tramadol has helped me stop drinking – now stop taking it.

Good weekend come and gone – don’t be sad because today will be great. Rob Whitham in my dream – it was interesting – I wanted to stay in it but can’t remember what happened now. Oh, cats so cute this morning.

Life is very good – I hope we can keep it this way for a good long time. We are so lucky.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my masks to help protect me from viruses. I’m getting used to wearing one now.

Poisoned with knowledge of good and evil – 3rd August 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Dream of sleep and shape-shifting snakes. Very tired – short fuse with drunk Amy last night – wore me out. Should I drink? Don’t want to much any more but feel at odds with Amy’s lifestyle. Maybe motivate her somehow. Not talked with her this morning, not sure what mood she is in. My mood is better but niggly, can push me over. Must try to stay calm.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful that I can wake up in a more reasonable mood than the one I went to sleep in.

How do you hide from something you have found? – 24th July 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Thinking how much better I feel mentally and a little bit physically. My body hurts in so many places but if I do my five-minute exercise every day I can feel it is making me feel better. I spent too many years ignoring my health and it’s hard to catch up but I’ll keep on.

Dreams – no recall. Today – last day of week with four days off.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the big breakfast I had this morning. Not sure I need to eat again today!

Too much is not enough – 23rd July 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Oh No! Bruno! – brainbox. Dream? I’m not sure but I am tired this morning – did not want to wake up. Exercised (five minutes) feel good. Mozzie heaven in my room in the morning.

Read back into my past – what was I thinking? Some days good, some days bad. Tim Smith passed away – only 59. Seven years older than me. I want to live longer. Especially now I am happy.

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for my glasses. I feel really disoriented without them. I love being able to see properly.

I glanced back on my life – 22nd July 2020

~ shaun tenzenmen ~ Leave a comment

Last night as I was going to sleep I remembered more of the dream that I had yesterday night. We – not sure who – were in some kind of outdoor festival/playground and I was scared to go headfirst down a cardboard tube in the ground. I don’t recall last night’s dream at all. Quick one today – want to meditate.

23rd Sep 2022 – Perhaps I had recently been remembering the time when I was six or seven and wouldn’t get on an escalator with my mum at a London Tube station. Escalators were truly scary for a little boy who had no idea what it was or how it worked and despite mum’s assurances that it was fine, I stood at the top crying my eyes out as she disappeared downwards. A very nice man walked me down the stairs to reunite with her a minute later. Such trauma!

Gratitude Journal

I am so happy and grateful for the foot inserts I can wear to try and make my feet feel better.